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Transposition
52 - Kayla

52 - Kayla

Not for the first time, Kayla closed her eyes and forced herself to take slow deep breaths. The contents of this damned binder revolted her utterly, and made controlling her temper a struggle—although, realistically, she had no available target, since Arctos had returned for the remaining four. She remained determined to get through it, though. Once any of their new allies got ahold of it, there was no guarantee it wouldn’t simply vanish. Arctos seemed genuine, and Kayla got no warning vibes from him, but who knew where the deepest loyalty of an insanely-powerful wizard might lie in this situation?

“Jace? I need another break. What can I do?”

JC had been tolerant of hard impulsive hugs as Kayla reminded herself that hers were okay and it was over, and had answered questions with a gentleness and tact Kayla probably should appreciate more. A couple of times, Kayla had gotten up from the table, needing to step back briefly, and JC had found her ways to help that gave her some distraction and a chance to do something with her hands.

Now, JC shook her head. “I’m not doing anything more right now, just watching what’s already on. There’s no cleaning to do, and the dishes are done. I’m sorry, I’m out of jobs to suggest. Maybe taking a walk would help?”

Kayla heaved a sigh. “Yeah, maybe. Maybe I’ll call it a day on this. I’m not sure how much more I can stomach right now. Can you...?”

“I’ll hide the binder.”

“Thanks.” Kayla got up from the bench, and stole one more hug, this one quicker and less a deep need to reassure herself.

Fetish maid with latex-like skin or not, the grey eyes that gazed back at her were nonetheless bright and alive, not the glassy eyes of a doll. “You’re welcome. Theo’s in the pasture still, of course, with Max.”

“I’m too predictable.”

JC smiled. Even if it took deliberate decision to do, it nonetheless looked genuine and included everything right down to the crinkling at the corners of her eyes, under the red and brown shadow. “Only in broad strokes on limited subjects.”

Kayla left the kitchen, oriented herself by the light high above at the very top of the fountain, and headed for the pasture.

Erica was just outside, kneeling with the tendrils of her skirt anchored into the ground; she opened her eyes, greeted Kayla with a quick smile, and waved her past. No one, Kayla reflected, was getting through that doorway without Erica’s permission.

Riley, presumably, was still upstairs in the loft. She’d settled down there with her phone and a small but complete Bluetooth keyboard she’d produced from her messenger bag—Kayla was beginning to wonder whether the inside might be bigger than the outside. Apparently she was composing an email to her sister, detailing everything they knew about the situation including the immense degree of help they were going to need as rapidly as possible. She had assured them all that while her family didn’t typically deal with anything this extensive, they did have experience with fast response to a crisis and they’d be able to help despite the incredibly-restrictive real-world timeframe.

That binder was exhausting.

Kayla made directly for Max. They’d crashed in the same bed before; when she curled up beside him, he made space for her without even really waking up. His familiar warmth and breathing and scent were comforting, with her head spinning out of control.

Water splashed, Theo rolling over in the stream and sitting up. Without a word spoken, she started to sing softly again.

That helped. Syncing the gold bracelet or not, Kayla had no interest in fighting it. She trusted Theo and she needed that escape.

She wasn’t even aware of the transition, from the song that made the world go away to the song that gently urged alertness, all bright and optimistic and energizing.

Theo stopped singing and said, “You don’t have to wake up completely all at once, but you’re going to want to go inside the stable. It rains just before sunrise every day, and you’re going to get wet out here. For some reason, I guess that’s bad?” Laughing, she stretched—she couldn’t lace her fingers together, but she could hook the fingers of one hand around those of the other, and the flexibility as she arched backwards was impressive. “Zach and Ali will grab the blankets. Jace and Des have food inside. And coffee, to help with that waking up thing, for anyone who wants it.”

“Bathroom?” Heather said.

“Ah... take turns in the stable, maybe? There’s a hole in one corner with a couple of handles on the walls. It’s basically a black hole that breaks down anything that goes into it. The closest actual bathroom is on the ground floor of the house.”

“Yeah,” Kayla said with a yawn. “What say we leave the hole in the ground to the boys and go find a toilet and toilet paper and all? I know where it is.”

“Worth the risk of getting wet on the way,” Heather said. She stole a quick kiss from Zach before getting up. “Back in a minute.”

Erica’s presence and position startled Heather, though only briefly. The green fae gave them a questioning look.

“Bathroom,” Kayla said. “I’m not using a hole in the ground if a short walk will give me civilized facilities.”

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Erica laughed silently, and gestured invitingly in the direction of the house.

The two women walked in silence.

“There is far too much in my head right now,” Heather sighed after a moment. “I’m hoping it settles down quickly so I can actually get a grip on what I’m thinking and feeling. Other than relief beyond words that Zach and the others are safe.”

“Yeah. I know. It’s going to catch up with me eventually, I’m just hoping I can delay it until it won’t be too inconvenient.”

“Thank you.”

“Oh, god, don’t go there. Let’s just get all of us through this as intact as possible, and we can all claim it as a collective victory, okay?”

Heather smiled. “Fair enough. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“When you were, I suspect, keeping Zach from either freezing up or running, you said that it wasn’t the easy part, it never is. That strikes me as oddly general. From Riley I suppose it could refer to other faelings letting their loved ones see them as they are, but what did you mean?”

Kayla shrugged. “Not exactly a deep dark secret, although I don’t talk about it because it’s usually not relevant to anything. Until I transitioned in my twenties, most of the world insisted on telling me I was a boy, on the theory that physical junk is somehow more important than literally everything in my head.”

Heather winced slightly. “Given some of the nastiness in the world, I wouldn’t bring it up either. I’ve had conversations with clients about their hiring practices. The tortured reasoning in their excuses for transphobia are worse than the ones for sexism.”

That Heather didn’t start backing away or otherwise react badly wasn’t a surprise, exactly, but it was still nice. “Eh, you ask me, it’s all the same thing. Sexism only works with absolute boundaries and a belief in fundamental differences, and transgender undermines that. To say nothing of devaluing the anatomy that they consider so valuable, if some of us will go to great lengths to get rid of it. Anyway. I’ve been through how scary it is to let someone see who you really are, and I’ve watched a lot of other people fumble their way through that phase. It’s not the same thing, obviously. But with how often they’ve all repeated that it feels ultimately natural and right to them, I’m inclined to just take their word for it—cis people, non-trans people I mean, frequently don’t get it, why I was so certain that I put myself through years of physical and social and emotional hell with no regrets. I don’t get how it feels to them, but I can accept it and support it without necessarily really getting it, y’know?”

Slowly, Heather nodded. “Right now, I’m deeply grateful for anything that helps Zach get through this. Obviously he knows. Should I ask how?”

Kayla laughed, opening the front door and stepping back to let Heather go inside. “Apparently Theo told the whole lot of them. Normally I’d be annoyed by that, but whatever help it was to them... eh, it’s fine. Like I said, not exactly a secret, or anything I’m ashamed of or anything, just not really anyone’s business most of the time. Straight back and on the right, just before the swinging doors to the kitchen. You can go first.”

“Thanks.”

Kayla, while she waited, examined the swinging doors. In explaining the bench with the leg that had been repaired in a way that Kayla considered clumsily obvious, JC had told her about Zach’s explosion just as he’d acquired his dragon scales and all, and the extensive damage. These doors would probably always be a reminder of that, since some of the repeated impacts had marked the wood below the paint.

Currently, the kitchen was empty, with no sign of JC, although there were still rich wonderful food scents, and under it Kayla smelled coffee. She didn’t consider herself a die-hard coffee junkie, but she had acquired a taste for it, and all the more so when she felt stressed and questioned her ability to handle a situation.

Finished, they turned back towards the stable. The sky was just beginning to lighten to grey, and Kayla felt a drop or two of rain. That encouraged them to walk fast instead of talking.

In the stable, they found piles of straw with blankets spread over them, forming tolerable seats; she barely had time to sit down before JC handed her a bowl of stew-soup-or-whatever with a circle of flatbread on top, and a mug of coffee.

The latter turned out to be sweet and creamy, the way she liked it, which might be Max or Theo or might be JC’s observational skills and memory.

This stew-or-soup was different from the previous one, but every bit as delicious. No wonder Niko and Des, who had the most exposure to JC’s cooking, loved it so much. Their house fae just seemed to be able to create wonderful food from anything available. She couldn’t imagine JC ever being careless of Des’ lactose intolerance, something she knew made eating anything prepared by others a roll of the dice. Was that still an issue? She made a mental note to ask Des about that.

Regardless, she was perfectly willing to eat anything JC handed her.

The rain began in earnest while they were still getting comfortable, a steady gentle rain that would probably saturate everything thoroughly.

The lighting within the stable was better than it had been outside, which gave the four newcomers a much clearer view of the exotic appearance of their companions; although Kayla kept a close eye on everyone, she didn’t hear anything that triggered her protective instincts, and hoped there hadn’t been while she was out of range. There were certainly some wide-eyed looks in all directions, attempts to absorb all the details but not stare too openly.

Suzi hovered just above the straw, wings tightly folded; while she was near Levi, she was also halfway hidden behind him and Alison, possibly trying to minimize the chance of accidents.

Alison had her feet tucked under her, close to Wade, though not touching.

Zach had coiled himself next to Heather the moment she was down, an improbably tight spiral of violet scales. Kayla saw Heather reach over and run a hand through his hair, before accepting bowl and cup from Des.

Theo leaned contentedly against Max, feet drawn up beside her; pearly blue scales showed on her upper leg where her sarong had fallen to one side, and the water still dripping from her long blue hair made them shimmer in the light. Max had one arm around her, eating with the other from the bowl balanced on his leg, one of Theo’s hands steadying it, and if he even noticed the water, Kayla saw no sign of it.

Finished serving food, JC knelt, back straight, near Kayla, and Des sprawled on Kayla’s other side. Erica stayed just outside, to all appearances enjoying the rain.

Since her faelings took the reactions all in stride, Kayla decided not to make an issue of it.

“This is excellent,” Heather said. “I don’t think I’ve eaten all day. Thank you.”

JC nodded. “Welcome.”

Kayla hoped that their faelings had eaten already, but figured for now she’d trust them to look after each other.