I woke to a purring noise. I sat up slowly to see the cat sitting on my dresser. Well it looked like a cat, mostly. Most cats however are not bipedal. Most don't have long tufts of curling fur on the ends. And most aren't sipping martini with a fish skeleton as a toothpick. I attempted to be as eloquent as possible when being woken by an intruder "Go away." I said as my pillow sailed through the air and caught the demon squarely in the jaw. He made an extremely satisfying yowl as he was sent flying off my dresser and into the wall. I debated for a moment but knew that if I didn't nip this new intrusion in the bud I was going to be dealing with it for the next week. "Aegemon!"

The demon appeared, his spectacles atop his nose "Ah, glad to know my efforts were worthwhile on cleaning your biohazard of an apartment and that you are ready to use the book of EverNight."

Before I could break his hopes and dreams the feline demon tore through my pillow and emerged with a hiss that was far less threatening than intended. It is tough to be scary and covered with cotton and torn fabric. I giggled. It was unexpected. I stopped as soon as it escaped.

Thankfully neither demon noticed, they were glaring at each other with the same amount of love I shared with my sister Candace. Aegemon was the first to speak "You're poaching!"

The feline folded his arms and sat back upon my dresser, the languid affect ruined by the white innards of the pillow still sticking to his fur "It isn't poaching if you can't close the deal." He purred, he hacked up a martini glass filled with vodka and a second later a fish skeleton "You've had this one for how long? And you still haven't nabbed her. It is time that someone with real skills brings her into the fold."

I threw a metal plate at the cat as I snarled "She is right here!"

He ducked, his drink tumbling and splashing into Aegemon's face. The cat lifted his head with a look of shock on his face, he touched the stub where his ear had been before and a deep gash across his jaw and eyebrow. "You cut me!"

"You woke her up." Aegemon responded as if it explained everything. He wiped the spilled drink from off his face with a black handkerchief.

The freshly wounded cat stared at him incredulous. "Are you serious?! She's a human! They aren't allowed to harm us! and if they do we tear flesh from bones and use their spine like a swizzle straw to suck up their brain goo!"

"That wasn't wise." the larger demon said as he took a large step backwards.

"Enough!" The furry demon hissed before he licked his wound with a tongue so long it could have been used as a yardstick. "This is stopping now!" He turned to me. "You join now or I vivisect you now!"

I pulled the string tied to my bed post. The chandelier cobbled together from a hundred different religious artifacts slammed into the cat with a clatter, he was pinned to the wall like a fly on glue. I got up and pulled a shirt on over my sports bra. I shuffled over to my new prisoner and poked him with a fireplace poker. "I don't like ultimatums." I purred dangerously, i had been hoping it would sound like the interloper but instead it just sounded slurred. I hated trying to talk when first waking up. "I've studied your kind for years, learned all the tricks in the book and the only reason I don't come down and kick all of you so hard that you can taste your underwear, is because it'd make me late to work. Do I make myself clear?!"

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The cat stared into my green eyes and what he saw there scared him. He attempted to vanish but the only thing that happened were sparks that shot up around him, quickly doused by the power of my trap. He thrashed in an attempt to get away. But just like a fly stuck to glue it was fruitless.

I turned my eyes to Aegemon and in a conversational tone asked "Should I let him go?"

The taller demon pondered it.

The cat hurried to convince him of the logic of letting him out "Please, please, please!"

"Mmm, I don't know. he is annoying."

"And loud." I added helpfully.

"It might be best to just do away with him." he said with finality.

"Well, he could also owe you a favor I suggested. Aren't favors from demons a big deal?"

Aegemon's smile appeared "Yes, that's true!" his eyes traveled back to the cat. "But he wouldn't go for that, that would be really stupid. Best to kill him."

"Are you that stupid?" I asked, my eyes still on the smaller demon.

"No, yes!" the cat was clearly losing focus beneath the power of prison. "I promise I owe you a favor!"

Aegemon smiled with all teeth now. "Splendid. let him go!"

I lifted the chandelier and the cat vanished in a poof of fire.

Aegemon didn't say anything for a long time. "You didn't know that trap would work...did you?"

I winked at him. "Hadn't a clue."

"And all your mentions about studies about hunting demons?"

"Got if from some movies and shows, no clue how any of this stuff works. The 'trap' is just an art piece I of different things I found in a second store and twined them all together and hung on my ceiling as an ornament."

"but the string..."

"oh, yeah, the mountings on the ceiling weren't perfect and if the string isn't there it slams down and hits the wall, took a few tries to get it to stop slamming down every few days."

Aegemon looked from the ornament to me a few times before he muttered "You just bluffed a demon?"

"He was a moron." I answered as I climbed back into bed. "and the way he was dressed he was asking for it."

"He wasn't dressed." he countered.

I grabbed another pillow and pulled it in close "Exactly, now turn off the light before you leave."