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To Fly the Soaring Tides
126 - Slime Time

126 - Slime Time

As Kuja said, the goblins sure looked happy. They tore away at the pile of meat ravenously, climbing on top of each other or scurrying away with hands full of innards. Cira had the fleeting thought that perhaps an equitable food distribution process would have been the wiser choice here, but again, she had no time for goblin politics. Perhaps it made her a bad leader, but her citizens would have to wait. It was time to empty her mind of all but slimes, lest she end up in a bind.

Cira took the initiative of pioneering their path into the first tomb, pulling a stake out of an ostensibly bottomless pouch at her hip and tossing it into the ground. It slid through the stone like soft dirt and runes came to life on impact. In seconds, a bright crimson haze filled the tomb, even washing out the Lamplight. Cira tossed another twenty or so feet ahead and motioned everyone to follow.

“You can cut the Lamplight now,” Like a trail of shining breadcrumbs, Cira formed a path.

“That’s really red.” Jimbo commented, avoiding direct eye contact with the artifacts.

“Well, it has to be. We don’t actually need flame just to keep them at bay. Like this, they can’t swarm us because they must condense their form to approach or they risk taking damage. See? There’s one now.”

A black snake wriggled out from behind one of the caskets lining their path, about as thick as Joe’s forearm. Jimbo yelped as it was right next to him and reflexively pulled out his sword, but before it even left its sheath, a shimmering white disk not much larger than a coin flew past him and lodged itself in the serpent. Cira hit her mark and they could hear a faint sizzling noise.

Before long, the snake started bubbling and suddenly exploded in a blast of pure white light. Her crew all shielded their eyes and twisted around screaming. “How is that not a bomb?!” Gil demanded.

“It’s a textbook mana conversion artifact.” Cira pulled another out just to be ready, “I contemplated inventing some manner of shaded eyewear, but the materials just weren’t there. I also couldn’t come up with a name for them.”

“How about bullshit blockers?” Still clasping his hands over his eyes, Jimbo’s suggestion wasn’t bad.

“I like it, but you guys better get ready. Now they know we’re dangerous.”

Tawny, Gill, and Cedric all had special roles to play here and took the positions of front, center, and rear, respectively. Tawny, actually right behind Cira, held a polished wooden staff embedded with rubies and topped with… an even bigger ruby. Truly a beautiful piece, but only bolstered her capabilities with flame. Cira made up for this by lending her a bracelet to increase her control over wind and instructed her to form a barrier of furling flames in front of the party that came together at in a wedge.

The inspiration here was the stonebreaker ships she once saw that were designed to push through dense debris fields, so it should work just as well for the colony of slimes surrounding them. To mitigate this, Gil held a purpose-crafted artifact that turned out looking like a banner. It had a wooden haft and extended over his head, sourcing a flaming bubble which surrounded their group.

It was a pure, animalistic instinct to sneak up on or simply approach one’s prey from behind. It was typically the most vulnerable side. As creatures of instinct, predatory slimes do this as well, so Cira placed her fastest mage in the rear. Cedric’s staff was crafted of countless stratoclam pearls, melded together through sorcery, and passively exuded wisps of electricity like Breeze Haven had when she fended off the sharks. Without speaking a word, he could blast out lightning bolts, and blast he did. The stifled thunder of his first attack sounded the start of battle as a shadowy racoon rolled over and started melting. It desperately clawed at the shadows which seemed now so far away, but Cedric finished it off with another strike.

“I-Is it dead?!” He cried.

Cira Tossed another coin at an amorphous lizard that was trying to swipe at Eros as he gawked at the spectacle, “Pay attention! If they’ve disconnected from the shadows, we can kill them!”

That was mainly true for killing them without using a Sunbearer Coin, as the crimson glow forced them to pick a distinct form in order to reach them, but the artifact would work either way. Cira just didn’t want them unloading their stores into the abyss because who knew how many there truly were. A full extermination would have to wait for her aura if Kuja wanted to proceed with it.

Now, the tomb was dark. Darker than anywhere should reasonably ever be, much more so than a simple closed-off room. Even the crimson beacons barely held up against the abysmal pressure and Cira wondered if there were no lights, if it would feel like the crushing depths of the sea.

The bordering caskets didn’t help either, as the ground to their sides was still pitch-black. Her stakes weren’t very tall. I have an idea… Cira tossed the next Slimewarding Stick into the ceiling and watched a writhing mass of half-formed creatures scurry away to reveal bare stone.

“Hey Kuja, why are there so many empty caskets?” Most had lids, others’ were crumbled, but a surprising number of the ones she could see into were barren. “I thought your ancestors ran out of room.”

“They did…” With light now shining from above, Kuja’s face was taut, seemingly alarmed. “Could the goblins have desecrated this place?”

“I can’t imagine why,” Cira skillfully took out a pair of slimey hyenas and they silently burst into light, “But it’s possible, I suppose.”

Cira did not want to worry her with the other possibilities—she would cross that bridge if they came to it. After all, missing skeletons could easily be attributed to curious slimes if nothing else.

“How are you guys talking so casually?!” Captain Shores seemed out of his element as he frantically threw a coin at a malformed wild boar before shielding his eyes, “I tried not to say anything with the goblins, but these things are scary as hell!”

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Everybody was equipped with a few hundred Sunbearer coins. They were small and relatively simple to produce. The product of multiple sleepless nights for Cira’s artificers—notably not for Cira. Despite their fear of the vicious slimes, the results spoke for themselves. The mages who had been so ruthlessly pushed back just a few days ago were immolating slimes as easily as pissin’ in a barrel, as it goes.

“This is practically a stroll on the docks, Captain.” Lero stated while pelting another lizard, “I thought we were gonna die last time. Now… They just walk right up to us.”

“It’s kind of sad,” A flash of light marked Tawny’s umpteenth kill. “I was really expecting to put my life on the line in a fierce battle. Not that I wanted to, but this is a little too drastic.”

“Like it or not, I’m responsible for you gangly lads ‘n’ lasses,” Cira watched Tawny’s infernal plow practically melt through the sea of slime, “Did I not tell you my intention was to make this process as safe as possible? A sorcerer overcomes their trials carefully and methodically.”

“Didn’t you curse a witch and burn her kneecap away with her own magic?” Using both hands to increase his throwing rate and making sound effects, Jimbo laughed at Cira. “I seem to remember you getting hammered and blowing soup all over some drunkard for no reason. What trial was that?”

“You saw that?!” Cira was mortified—her drunken magic test in Milty’s Tavern was something that even she had forgotten about. It came flooding back like a tidal wave of fresh soup. “You must be thinking of someone else… More importantly, we should hurry!” Another stake lodged itself into the ceiling, “Unless you guys want a real fight to the death on the way home, I suggest you ration your artifacts better. The slimes certainly aren’t thinning out.”

Jimbo had figured out he could just toss them into the nether and kill any given unlucky slime as the group inhabited but a meager crimson haven within their mass.

“I also think we should hurry!” Captain Shores backed her up and the crew matched Cira’s pace. “I don’t like it here.”

“He’s going to love it down below,” Mac neglected to omit a drawn-out yawn from his telepathic message, “Looks like you’re having fun.”

“Hardly” Cira replied, “You going to tell me what’s down there or what?”

It appeared she was the only one who heard his voice, while the others all casually fought off slugs and weird birds. Cira was in a constant state of squinting her eyes from the bright lights. All the revenants around must have simply disappeared into the walls at some point to avoid it. None had shown themselves since the fighting started, but it was possible they avoided the slimes in general. Revenants were stronger, of course, but they could surely be overwhelmed.

“I’m sure you’ve guessed one of those things,” Mac chuckled. The very fact that he could make a joke instead of reply truthfully meant that Cira could certainly expect skeletons.

“Great… and…?” Cira maintained this conversation while lighting the path and vanquishing her foes, all while keeping a close eye on their defenses. Their flaming dome and plow really did most of the work and even the crew was holding menial conversation with each other. Shores was the only one who seemed uncomfortable at this point. “What manner of beast awaits us in the next tomb or two? Don’t tell me it’s all slimes.”

“Okay, I won’t.” He only lasted a moment before he snickered amusedly, “Just kidding, just kidding… slimes are easy because their ‘souls’ which me and your elderly friend can see are really just scraps left over from their food. Think of how you fleshy creatures eat vegetables and retain a little iron. But if I’ve never seen a particular creature, I can’t identify it so easily by soul alone.”

Did that guy just compare human souls to broccoli…? Cira did her best to move past it.

Perhaps there really was something to the name Valley of Curses if there were undead walking about. In theory, all it took was one cursed person to die and become one with the soil before their corrupt mana spread. Hell, combine that with an endless source of a particular mana that resonates well with curses, and a skeleton factory was not outside the realm of possibilities. As curses were corrupt mana, they could easily deform under such conditions to do any number of unreasonable things.

Nothing I can’t solve handily… It’s the mysterious monsters which worry me. I really don’t want to make another trip unless it’s to carry the soul thresher. “Kuja, how far are we?”

“About half of the way to the next stairwell.” She replied with a big smile on her face. “I never would have dreamed we could walk through here so easily.”

A nimbus shark darted out from the shadows and Kuja tossed a coin into its maw and ducked, but another slime used the flash as a distraction to get the jump on Cira as soon as it cleared. A massive beak like a woodpecker’s but sized closer to a javelin emerged in the blink of an eye. Kuja gasped and reached for another coin, but she wouldn’t make it in time. The sharpened beak would pierce Cira through before her hand left the satchel.

With both hands wrapped around Shadow Quill, Cira saw it coming. The way her warding bracelets were positioned there was only one place the slime could aim for on Cira’s torso.

You would dare pierce my breast?! Cira leaned back and tipped the quill up just enough to catch the slime. “Hahhh!” A grinding noise drew everyone’s attention as the remarkably rigid beak jutted up and into the flaming dome, revealing a disturbingly elongated bird approaching Cira rapidly with no feathers useless appendages hung from its back in place of wings.

It had no face, but Cira dropped the quill and went for the neck, “You slimy bastard! Face my Slime Purging Gloves!” Instead of clattering against the ground, Shadow Quill floated along behind Cira, courtesy of Captain Wick’s door and only the most cutting-edge floating basket technology.

Cira’s glove started to glow pure white and so did the slime, starting at the neck. These gloves were made of something that Cira hated deeply—solar widow silk. The illogical arachnids were much larger than her and liked to hang off of clouds. Without spatial sight constantly active, they were impossible to see with the sun behind them.

Easily the biggest reason Cira was content considering higher altitudes an unexplored frontier, but the materials! Wait—

Cira delivered a ruthless punch with her other hand into the deranged bird’s gizzard and a burst of light spread throughout its body before ultimately ending in a violent explosion that resonated in the screams of her crew.

Why were they all watching? Boy, do I love these gloves though. Naturally, her dad sourced the materials, and it was better if she just didn’t think about it.

The gloves held the same effect as the coins, but using silk which wouldn’t break down from absurd concentrations of light. These were something of a backup, but Cira had to admit that punch felt good. Thrilling, almost. Definitely satisfying. Perhaps that’s how the late King Goblong felt absolutely walloping her in the face. It could not be discounted either that a floating staff made her feel more comfortable all around, not that she could use it without grabbing it and doodling in the air. It just made her feel better.

If only it weren’t for this damn leg, I would feel great. It hadn’t been feeling too bad as they had a few slow days, but the stairs were a great reminder that she indeed cut her leg off and replaced it with a stick.

A small bear cub trundled out of the dark and Cira uppercut it so fast she was reminded of the helpless ghosts of Fount Salt dematerializing in an instant. Despite having to get up close and personal, these artifacts seemed to work better than the throwaway versions, and it turned out to be a great way to save on munitions. Cira’s mind was already far past the First Tomb. Slimes weren’t worth her time. She had to mentally prepare for the challenges ahead.