« Nobody would accept you. Why? Because you’re still not acceptable as a person. You still lack this little something that’ll make you acceptable. What do you lack, you ask? Try to remember where you went wrong, you’ll notice by yourself. »
“TRAITOR!” yelled what seemed to me to be the leader of the group, before an archer aimed at me and fired an arrow at my head.
It bounced back once again on my skin. That did hurt me very much, but it didn’t leave a scratch on me. This simple fact terrified the group of bandits I was facing.
“M-Monster!!”
I started to have some doubts about myself. But I would settle them later. For now, I had criminals to judge.
“I would have been a bit more lenient with you all, if it wasn’t for this uncalled attempt at my life…”
I myself didn’t knew how much truth I held in this sentence. Would I really let them be, fully knowing about their crimes? No, that would be absurd of me. Evil doers must be executed, that was the law back then.
Back then… Another flawed memory that made no sense to me…
Amongst their group, I saw a total of three archers, all ready to shoot me again. As that would have been painful to me, I removed those annoyances with a simple thought.
They were confused to see three of their colleagues vanishing without any prior notice.
“Hey, what happened to Jack?” asked one of those fellows.
Who knew? I still wasn’t even sure how this power worked. I could make problems disappear, wasn’t that enough?
“And now… *Sigh*. Why am I losing my time with this? Just convince me if you’re guilty or not, and that’ll be all.”
“You asshole! I don’t know what you did, but if you don’t bring back my men, I’ll drill another hole in your face!”
“That is funny, because I have no face.”
I snapped my fingers, and the pretentious leader disappeared.
Then, it was chaos. Everyone began to spout excuses and random stories at me.
“They baited me in this business!”
“I’ll never do it again, I swear!”
“I have a wife and a daughter, mercy!”
Nope. Nope and nope. They vanished one by one, each time I listened to them and judged that their reason was inexcusable.
Then, I remembered why I always enjoyed playing the hero or the guardian. Sure it was satisfying to protect people against the odds… But I would never have enough of their nonsense when it was time to judge them.
I had been told that I was too rigid on the matter, but for me it was a black or white question. You were guilty, or you weren’t. There was no grey zone where it was acceptable to harm someone. Oh, another clearer memory this time.
It wasn’t that hard to begin with. If you do bad things, you’ll be judged. Why couldn’t they understand such simple principle?
Each of them continued to give me banal excuses, but I didn’t care. There could be no valid reason that would give a person the right to cross the line.
“I repent of my crimes! I repent of losing my way! I repent of ignoring the Rules! My ancestors would forgive me only if I atoned for my doings, so please be the same, spirit!”
A loud voice silenced the annoying bandits. It came from a kneeling young man, looking down while brandishing some sort of symbol at me.
Now that was new. The wish of redemption. I approached him out of curiosity. Upon closer inspection, I thought I noticed a peculiar detail. I quickly dismissed it, as I was too busy focusing on mypart.
“You ask for forgiveness?” I asked the young man. He quickly glanced at me before bowing down again, but it gave me enough time to notice something out of the ordinary. His eyes were not human, but I couldn’t tell which race he was from.
“Please spirit. I have been through the first three baptisms, and I solemnly ask for your pardon.”
I didn’t know what he meant, maybe those baptisms were part of his religion or something like that. But again, that didn’t matter to me. I was actually annoyed by his performance. Instead of making excuses, he was bashfully telling me he was a criminal who longed for redemption. He dared…
“You dare ask for forgiveness?” I grabbed him by the collar and lifted him close to me.
“Why should I forgive you? Why should I forgive you when I haven’t forgiven the others?!”
“B-Because I’m asking you, spirit!”
“Because you asked me? Just because you asked, you think I would forgive you? YOU?!”
My voice was full of wrath. I lifted him even higher until his legs couldn’t touch the ground. He tried to grab my arms, his legs running wild due to the panic I must have induced.
Stolen story; please report.
“How many lives have you ruined?! For how many years people had to live in fear because of you?! How many victims have you actually killed, tell me?!”
Just enunciating the possible outcomes reminded me of the dream. The fire, the blood, the corpses. The falling fortress, the shrieks of agony, I saw them all, again. It scared me to believe that it actually happened. But it angered me to believe that someone in this world would do the same to others.
I became so furious I started to shake the man like a mere ragdoll, yelling at him while ignoring his cries. How could he harm others? How could he accept to bring disaster in other’s life? Can’t he understand how painful that is for the victims? Why wouldn’t he understand? Why?
“TELL ME!!!”
My anger reaching its peak, I… Threw the man against a tree.
I couldn’t see clearly, nor could I hear anything else. My wrath blinded me and made me deaf. And this lack of perception allowed me to recollect my senses.
I… Was so angry. I was angry with him… But also with me. I shouldn’t let myself lose my temper, it was inappropriate for a hero. I was so ashamed of myself, so frustrated with my stupidity.
I let out a deafening roar while holding my head with my hands. How could I be so stupid?
I threw my fists on the ground until it broke under my stubbornness. Why was I so stupid?
What was I, before losing my memory? I wanted to cry, but my body had no tears to spare.
Once I cooled down, I looked around me, but couldn’t recognize the surrounding. I literally destroyed the place, the trees were felled and the ground was upside-down. I couldn’t see any of the remaining bandits, maybe they escaped while I rampaged.
I didn’t care anymore about them, I just hoped they wouldn’t commit anymore crimes and forgave themselves.
“Master.” It was the mymu, it probably stayed behind until I calmed down.
“I… What am I?” I looked at the mymu, asking him for an answer I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear. Maybe it understood my fear, because it either refused to answer me, or simply couldn’t give me an answer at all.
Whatever the answer was, I definitely wasn’t an ordinary man. It wouldn’t be strange to call me a monster at this point, I wouldn’t mind actually.
After all, it was true, wasn’t it?
“Help… Help me…”
A faint voice reached my ears. I looked at the source and saw the dishevelled body of the man I threw earlier. I quickly went to his side, but what could I do?
“What have I done?...” His legs and his right arm were completely messed up, and many ribs popped from his abdomen. He coughed a load of blood, I didn’t think he could be saved at this point.
I wanted to use my power to help him. But how? Until now I only used it to make people disappear, I never healed someone with such magic. Me who claimed to be invincible and unbeatable, I was actually powerless when facing a dying man.
I couldn’t change this fact. I was the one who unjustly killed him.
I tried to comfort him, but I also prevented myself from doing so. What gave me the right to ease his pain? Right, maybe I should just put him out of misery…
Then I saw the mymu getting close, until it… Started to slowly cover the body of the boy.
“W… What are you doing?” I awkwardly tried to do something, however I was too confused with the recent events that I wasn’t even sure what I was trying to do. “Stop… Don’t…”
“Please Master, you have done enough. Let me help him.” Answered the mymu to my complaint.
Help him… I still didn’t know what the mymu meant to do. But what else could I accomplish, now that I turned him in this state? Maybe it was for the best.
I let the mymu swallow the dying man. The water slowly turned red with all the blood it was sucking, turning opaque and blocking my view on his body. It was for the best… Yes…
I waited until the mymu finished with his business. As the culprit, I had the duty to attend this scene to the very end.
A few moments later, the operation was over. The mymu was about to back away when a hand suddenly popped out of its liquid form, quickly follow by the rest of the torso. There, I could see the face of the gasping boy.
He was alive. He looked at himself, how his body rejuvenated. It dawned on him that he was half-engulfed in the mymu, this part must have shook him with terror as he vigorously wrestled to extricate himself from here.
However, he was alive, intact, healed to the bones.
“You are… Fine…” I muttered, but probably not quietly enough as he turned to face me with an expression of fear and surprise.
We both exchanged our gaze, and I was the first to avert my eyes with relief. “You are fine…” I said again in disbelief.
How could I even begin to imagine that such a miracle would happen?
“Ehhhh-Spirit?! Why am I…? What is the mymu doing to me, please? Is it trying to eat me?” He asked me with a frightened tone, petrified in his position while he probably thought any strange movement from him would awaken the monster or something.
I… Wasn’t sure how to react here. All I did was shacking my head in denial, thinking the mymu probably wouldn’t attempt to eat him anymore after what it did.
“The bones have been reconnected. The muscles are stitched to their original position. Anaemia has been prevented after cleaning and reinjecting the lost blood. I have completed the healing procedure, Master.”
It was the mymu’s voice again. It backed away after concluding his work was finished, freeing the boy from its grasp. It must have been quite the loathly feeling as he growled in a dejected manner.
He was alive, I still couldn’t believe what I just witnessed. “Are you alright?” I couldn’t help but ask about his wellbeing.
“I… Yes?” He patted himself where the bones were protruding earlier. He himself probably couldn’t believe that he was on the verge of death a few moments earlier, and now… Now he seemed completely fine, as if nothing happened.
I sighed in relief. He would live another day, that was all I wished for him. How could have I been so rash? It was inexcusable to commit a crime, I still firmly believed in this statement. But then shouldn’t it be my duty to offer them a chance to repent? I should have told them there was a way for redemption. Or should I have? Even if I did, what could I have told them then? It was too late to reconsider. What’s done is done.
“Can you stand?” I wanted to check if he could walk by himself. Seeing for himself, he quickly got on his feet, visibly feeling no tension nor undesirable aftermath.
“Yes I can. Thank you, spirit.”
Another denomination for myself. First sorcerer, now I was a spirit. I didn’t mind, I already accepted the fact I wasn’t human.
I heard him muttering something like “I’m really alive…” while checking a second time his health. The armour he wore was bruised, but not damaged to the point where some part were missing. Even the traces of blood were gone, the mymu really did a good job in taking care of him.
“What will you do now? Going back home?” I only wanted to ease my mind when I’ll think about him in the future. Just imagining him losing his way again of his life after letting him go would leave a bad taste.
“I… Would like to, yes…” But he shook his head “But I can’t. If someone knows I transgressed twice the Rules, it won’t end with just a banishment...”
I became curious about those Rules he spoke about. But I also thought it may not be the right time to start asking various questions. He didn’t let it show, but I was certain he would soon need some time to relieve all this stress.
“Master, we should leave now.” The mymu called for me. “Where to?” I asked back. I had no idea I had any place waiting for me, however this creature here seemed to be special. It held experience and memory, it would surely be useful if I could have it aid me.
“To the chapel where Aederinilitium is located. She can help you recover your memories, and I also believe she knows where Qalendra is.”