The green, flickering darkness was hard to find. But Threadbare and Graves and Tane had plenty of practice dealing with dungeons. They left the Mousewife outside to mind the children, and walked into the space between worlds.
Black there, blacker than the void, with green shimmering pillars holding people and things, and flickering green letters and numbers scrolling by overhead.
This was the core chamber, the reality behind the dungeon. This was where the Rumpus Room was designed and reconfigured and controlled.
And there in the central pillar of green light, sitting on the oddly-solid ground and holding her face, was Mrs. Beemer.
Threadbare looked around, at the pile of items they kept in here to rearrange the testing grounds. She'd shoved mannequins and living supplies into empty monster slots, and tucked Reason into one of the boss pillars. Reason raised her hands apologetically and waved at the tiny bear. Stuck, Threadbare knew, until the master willed Reason to be free.
“Please empty the pillars once they're open,” Threadbare said. “Tane, could you enter the master pillar when she leaves it?”
“Me? I... I'm not trained in this.”
“Graves?”
“I'll do it, then.” Graves patted Tane on the shoulder. “I've been studying these for years. I should be able to keep things safe and under control.”
Threadbare sat down in front of the master pillar. “Mrs. Beemer? Please come out. We're done here, I'm afraid.”
She didn't stir at first. But slowly she looked up, eyes puffy and tears streaking her face, spectacles nowhere to be seen. She stepped forward, eyes not meeting his, and the second she was gone Graves slid into the pillar behind her.
“I... why did you step down? Why did you leave us?” Mrs. Beemer whispered. “So long as you were in charge, we were safe.”
“I wasn't in charge,” Threadbare said. “I was one of many councilors—”
“But you were the central one! All of this is because of what you did, what you chose. You're the one who found us the way forward, the one who defeated the old king.”
“Celia did that. I only helped her.”
“She would be nothing without you! She would be dead! And she's... she can't protect us,” her face sagged, the brief flash of anger melting it like wax, back into sorrow. “The things they're saying. The things they keep saying about us, keep accusing us of doing... we're not... but... we can't... they keep lying, and...”
Threadbare's anger was fading. He had tried to carry it up to this point, but now that he was here, his pity was greater than his rage.
So instead he said nothing and hugged her.
If she had been wounded, he would have healed her with that hug. But she was untouched, had suffered no hurt save for the one he couldn't heal.
“Edith,” Tane said, finally, his voice raw. “Come on. It's over. We'll get you out of here. You can rest and we'll sort this out. It's over.”
“You should have been our king,” Mrs. Beemer whispered into Threadbare's ear, as she hugged him back. “We wouldn't have minded if you ruled us forever.”
Threadbare felt a pain that had nothing to do with his torn stitches and stretched stuffing, a pain that hit him in his soul. “That is why I had to go,” he whispered back to her.
And it wasn't the only reason, but it was one of the big ones, and she was sobbing too hard to hear the other reasons anyway.
Meanwhile, behind his back, the biggest Reason in the room clanked out of her pillar. “I am sorry,” she said. “Mrs. Beemer said it was an emergency. I tried to let you know I was okay.”
Reason's voice was a muted, slightly hissing bellow of steam and gears. Designing her voicebox had been tricky, since it had to be loud enough to be heard over the sound of her boiler. But still, some of the chagrin and hurt came through.
“That was what the thumbs up was about,” Threadbare said, solving that particular mystery. “Well. Nevermind. Tane, please take her out of here. Graves, please rearrange things so that she can have a comfy room. Reason, do you remember how the configuration was before you... were transferred?”
“I don't,” said Reason, whose jobs were mostly about combat and fighting. “I'll have to go and fetch the instruction books again.”
“We'll wait,” said Threadbare.
Eventually, after Reason went and found the huge-sized manual that the facility staff had prepared for her to read, she was confident enough to swap places with Graves and take over the master pillar.
Graves, when he got out, was not happy.
“This is going to have to go up to the Council. I'll have to raise it directly. It would be bad enough if we'd managed to solve it without fatalities, but we have a dead Doll Haunter... permanently dead, mind you.” he sighed.
“If I had been thinking, I would have cast a Soulstone when Daffodil was destroyed,” said Threadbare. “But it was over too quickly.”
“Don't blame yourself. I told him I had a pair of soulstones in my pocket, and to hop over if things went poorly. But I checked them while I was in the master pillar, and they're empty. Damned if I know why,” Graves sighed again. “He went through the operation once. He should have remembered to go for them. But then, death is disorienting at the best of times.”
“That doesn't make it any better,” Threadbare said, pulling off his top hat, and realizing that he was still a bit torn up. “Mend.”
The popped stitches sealed, and his stuffing healed, but the pain in his heart didn't go away.
They had won, true, and saved almost everyone, but this had been one of those times where almost wasn't good enough.
“Give me a little time,” Threadbare said, making a decision that eased the pain a bit. “I need to break it to... her.”
“Celia? I was going to ask you how she's been, lately.”
“Not well,” Threadbare said simply.
And those two words left volumes unsaid in the silence that followed.
**********
It was a crappy tavern, the sort of roadside inn that catered to bandits, rangers, and very lost halvens on the occasional road trip that focused around disposing of stolen jewelry or annoying dragons or something of that sort.
The innkeeper paused mid-swipe in his neverending quest to stir his spit around every unused mug behind the bar, and glanced upwards as the stairs creaked. Heavy brows furrowed, and he got his club, lovingly carved with the name “Ed Nocker,” out from its holster.
A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.
“Ain't nobody got nothing worth stealing so get back down 'ere Rondo and stop yer.... sneaking...” and his voice trailed off as wooden feet clacked down the stairs.
“Er...” he said, staring at the somewhat familiar wooden man that was adjusting his jacket and grinning at him with whitened birch teeth.
It was the smile that did it. “Ah! Hello sir. Didn't expect to see yer back again. I ah, yer room's been rented out,” the innkeeper stammered. “But I could find yer another if ya want. Same price. So... yer a doll haunter now?”
“Gaslight,” said the wooden man.
“Wot?”
“I've always been a doll haunter,” the wooden man said. “Don't you remember?”
And the innkeeper did.
Memories of this man's weathered, fleshy face faded, and in every memory the innkeeper tried to dredge up, he couldn't remember a time when the man hadn't been a jointed wooden mannequin.
“Ah. Right you are then, sorry,” the innkeeper said. “Shall you have your usual supper? Pale ale too, right?”
For a second his mind warred with the image of a wooden man consuming a rack of lamb and a cheap beer, before he told himself he was being silly. Doll haunters didn't eat or drink! Mostly, anyway.
“No need,” the wooden man told him, as he sat in the corner, and pulled one of the complimentary hooded cloaks that the innkeeper left out for old men with maps who enjoyed getting new adventurers killed. “I'm meeting someone. Won't be long, I think.”
Mollified, the innkeeper went back to his spitshining.
A few hours later, a young woman slunk through the door, cast her eyes around the room, and gave the innkeeper a hard look before heading toward the corner.
The innkeeper moved down the bar a bit, as they started whispering, and managed to get into position to hear her say “It's in the cart. I don't think they noticed it's missing. What are you going to do with it now?”
Then a wooden head turned, and glass eyes gleamed out at him from under the hood. The innkeeper froze, then shrugged, keeping his face blank. “You want sumpin?” he asked, sounding nowhere near as nonchalant as he'd intended it to be.
The wooden man scowled, the joints of his face rearranging itself. “They Say... you're a bad bartender. They Say... they're coming to get you. They Say... if you're here when they get here, you're a dead man.”
The innkeeper dropped the mug he was polishing, and fled for his life.
THEY were after him, after all! And oh, oh, oh the things THEY were saying!
After he had gone so fast that dust puffed up on the road outside in great billowing clouds, the young woman whistled.
“That was mean.”
“So are the rooms he lets here. They're more like bedbug feeding pens,” said Daffodil Copperfield. “Ah... listen. That final payment I promised you? It's going to have to wait. I lost my money when I died.”
“That was a slick trick, by the way,” she said, studying him with a smile. “Must have been a hell of an illusion to fool both Graves and Threadbare.”
“Illusion,” Daffodil sighed. “Yeah. Sure.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Just... ah, call it a token regret,” his smile was crooked, but there was a hint of pain in those glass eyes. “Desperate measures. No worries.”
“But you don't have my payment?”
“I do, but not here. You're going to have to come with me if you want the rest of what I owe you.” He stood and stretched out a hand, the sorrow on his face vanishing. “What do you say?”
She stood, taking his hand as she considered, then nodded. “Nothing to lose here, now,” she decided. “So where are we going?”
“East. And that's all you need to know, for now.”
“Still so suspicious,” she said, leading him out to the wagon she'd commandeered, and snapping the whip over the horses' heads. “I told my co-workers I needed to go home and recover, after that mess with Mrs. Beemer. They won't miss me for weeks.”
“You? No. But this is a different story,” said Daffodil as he checked under the straw in the back of the cart.
“I rather think they'll miss this guy,” he said and covered the mercury golem back up as they rode off with the setting sun at their back.
THREADBARE'S CHARACTER SHEET
Age: 8
Guild: Reclaimers Association of Generica
Jobs:
Greater Toy Golem Level 20
Cave Bear Level 14
Ruler Level 22
Tailor Level 12
Model Level 19
Necromancer Level 13
Duelist Level 15
Animator Level 19
Enchanter Level 18
Golemist Level 30
Scout Level 11
Smith Level 14
Sculptor Level 14
Jobs stored in Guild Registry
Shaman 7
Attributes Pools Defenses
Strength: 174 Constitution: 184 Hit Points: 548 Armor: 68
Intelligence: 367 Wisdom: 294 Sanity: 851 Mental Fortitude: 58
Dexterity: 238 Agility: 206 Stamina: 634 Endurance: 78
Charisma: 191 Willpower:353 Moxie: 734 Cool: 26 (41)
Perception: 180 Luck: 134 Fortune: 504 Fate: 30
Generic Skills
Brawling - Level 68 (+15)
Climb - Level 20
Clubs and Maces - Level 23
Dagger - Level 15
Dodge - Level 32
Fishing - Level 1
Magic Items - Resist Fire
Ride - Level 17
Stealth - Level 33
Swim - Level 5
Greater Toy Golem Skills
Adorable - Level 91
Bodyguard - Level 19
Gift of Sapience - Level NA
Golem Body - Level 56
Innocent Embrace - Level 23
Magic Resistance - Level 20
Cave Bear Skills
Animalistic Interface - NA
Claw Swipes - 58
Darkspawn - NA
Forage - 21
Growl - 2
Hibernate - 37
Scents and Sensibility - 25
Stubborn - 13
Toughness - 25
Ruler Skills
Appoint Official - Level NA
Complex Decree – Level NA
Emboldening Speech - Level 25
Identify Subject - Level 62
It’s Good to be King - NA
King’s Quest - Level 28
Kingsguard - Level 10
Noblesse Oblige - Level 78
Organize Minions - Level NA
Proclaim Treaty - Level NA
Royal Audience - Level 25
Royal Quest – Level NA
Simple Decree - Level 22
Swear Fealty - Level NA
Tailor Skills
Adjust Outfit - Level 6
Clean and Press - Level 31
Recycle Cloth - Level 7
Tailoring - Level 57
Model Skills
Adjust Weight - Level 21
Call Outfit - Level 26
Dietary Restriction - Level 95 (+190 to all pools)
Fascination - Level 16
Flex - Level 27
Flexible Pose - Level 5
Makeup - Level 12
Scornful Laugh – Level 1
Self-Esteem - Level 27
Sexy Pose - Level 2
Strong Pose - Level 19
Work it Baby - Level 80 (+80% to raw item bonuses)
Necromancer Skills
Assess Corpse - Level 12
Command the Dead - Level 28
Deathsight - Level 9
Drain Life - Level 8
Invite Undead - Level 19
Mana Focus - Level NA (+13% to sanity)
Skeletons - Level 20
Soulstone - Level 47
Speak With Dead - Level 28
Zombies - Level 3
Duelist Skills
Challenge - Level 15
Dazzling Entrance - Level 18
Disarm - Level 3
Fancy Flourish - Level 16
Guard Stance - Level 24
Offensive Stance – Level 4
Parry - Level 27
Pommel Strike – Level 1
Riposte - Level 2
Swashbuckler’s Spirit - NA (+15 to cool)
Swinger - Level 8
Weapon Specialist - Level 50 (Brawling +25)
Animator Skills
Animus - Level 60
Animus Blade - Level 20
Animus Shield - Level 6
Arm Creation - Level 14
Command Animus - Level 42
Creator’s Guardians - Level 80
Deanimate - Level 6
Distant Animus - Level 4
Dollseye - Level 25
Eye for Detail - Level 21
Magic Mouth - Level 18
Mend - Level 74
Enchanter Skills
Appraise - Level 36
Boost+5 - Level 25
Boost +10 - Level 5
Disenchant - Level 24
Elemental Protection - Level 18
Glowgleam - Level 26
Harden - Level 36
Soften - Level 31
Spell Protection – Level 2
Spellstore I - Level 40
Spellstore V - Level 18
Spellstore X - Level 8
Spellstore XV – Level 1
Wards - Level 3
Golemist Skills
Armor Golem - Level 7
Bone Golem - Level 2
Call Golem - Level 12
Clay Golem - Level 13
Command Golem - Level 33
Flesh Golem - Level 1
Golem Animus - Level 70
Golem Guardians - NA
Greater Golem Upgrade - Level 36
Invite Golem - Level 21
Mend Golem - Level 72
Mercury Golem – Level 2
Program Golem - Level 47
Toy Golem - Level 101
Wood Golem - Level 22
Scout Skills
Alertness - Level 3
Best Route - Level 3
Camouflage - Level 17
Firestarter - Level 12
Keen Eye - Level 13
Sturdy Back - Level 13
Wind's Whisper - Level 26
Smith Skills
Adjust Arms and Armor - Level 20
Refine Ore - Level 15
Smelt Down - Level 7
Smithing - Level 52
Sculptor Skills
Detect Clay - Level 8
Mend Ceramic - Level 6
Refine Clay - Level 18
Sculpting - Level 61
Equipment
Golden Laurels (Enables the REST skill, usable every two hours.)
Inventory
Quests
Unlocked Jobs
Air Elementalist, Berserker, Burglar, Cleric, Cook, Cultist, Grifter, Merchant, Spirit Medium, Tamer, Wizard