*deep sighhhhhhhh*

Alright.

So, I thought I was up to begin posting this story again. I was still unhappy with it, but I was trying to convince myself that the editing I did was enough and that I'd feel better about it once the burnout went away. Well, in good news, the burnout is pretty much gone (I'm also working on another book, a fantasy romance this time, and I'm not struggling with that one at all) but my unhappiness with Thistlelight remains.

I've been trying to take a hard look at the elements of the story and figure out exactly what it is that has me dreading writing it. At the heart of it, I really like the story—an old man and his grandkids on a journey across the broken world. That is an extremely me story. I also like the weird little system I've come up with. In the end, I think it comes down to two things:

The setting isn't working for me. It's a certainly passible fantasy setting, and I love a lot of the stuff with the mutated system and the plants and animals, but something about it still feels off to me. The atmosphere and tone are wrong, and for me, that completely breaks a book. Again, I know it's decent, but for me as the author, it's not enough.

As a continuation of that, the writing itself feels duller than I appreciate. The story itself is dark, and that's what it's meant to be, but the writing and tone have a strangely dull nature about them that I didn't intend. I try to write my books with a lot of heart in them, and moments of joy among the darkness, and it's certainly here in Thistlelight, but it isn't coming across the way I want it.

Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

All in all, I think I need to rewrite the book. I have a whole 130k draft of this first book written, and a whole arc after this point finished, and there are some good things in it, but again, it isn't what I intended it to be. I've already begun massively reworking the worldbuilding in my head, enough so that editing definitely wouldn't be enough, and I might even change the organization of the plot. The heart and intention of the story will remain the same, but I want it to be better, and I need it to be better in order to be proud of it.

I've never actually had a book give me this much trouble, and this is going to be a long series where everything needs to come together properly, so I'm really in new territory writing this (not to mention the fact that this is my first litrpg).

This is all a very long-winded way of saying that I'm re-writing this book/series, so the posting has to stop again for a while. When I'm finished it with, it will likely be so different I'll have to post it from the beginning again, I'm not sure.

I'm incredibly grateful to all of you who've been patient with me and left so many nice comments the last few chapters. It's extremely heartening to know that people love this story, and that it's worth saving the way I want to save it. I have no idea how long this rewrite is going to take, but I consistently talk about this story and my process on it over on my youtube channel, so if you'd like to follow along there, I'd love to have you. Otherwise, I will be posting it again. I want to tell this story. Apparently, it's just not going to be as easy as any of my other books.

Alright then, I suppose that's pretty much it for now. I'll post again as soon as I can, and thank you all again for giving this story so much love. ❤️