Chapter 7 - SHI! Too many questions ;-;

Shi. Shi, shi, shi. Whadafack?

It’s a form of energy existing beyond the scope of mana, and following another set of rules entirely.

No.

Yes. I’m only giving you the post-analysis data. Those are facts.

Run it again, that can’t be right. Do it during Noa’s next training. If it existed, we would have discovered it long ago.

...As you wish, but don’t come screaming at me if the results are the same.

Long story short, the results were the same and I screamed at her. What a bad mother I am.

And so, after I received a second and third confirmation of those data, I started grasping all the occasion I had to look at Noa’s training.

I spotted the first big difference between Mana and Shi quite quickly, during Noa’s second training session.

Shi could be used raw to materialise solid structure. As in, things made out of Shi. That was, of course, impossible with mana. You couldn’t build physical things out of pure mana, only borrow mana to use other things to create solid structures.

Second difference: Shi was supposedly emanating from your body.

“Shi is your life force.” Started explaining dad to Noa, during one of his training.

“It’s the power that sleeps within your body, in your heart, your guts, your arms and legs, everywhere. Drawing Shi is to create an extension of your own body, by taking this life force out of your body and controlling it just like another limb.”

Bullshit. Impossible. I had worked all my life with bodies, tinkering with them, changing them, forging them like you forge tools and never had I encountered this so-called life force, not even once.

Well, I had difficulties accepting it at first but, day after day, my brother was proving me that I was wrong to deny it.

At some point, I was torn between two sides:

Frustration. I was a specialist in bodies. How could I have missed that?

Curiosity. It was a whole new thing altogether, with new possibilities.

In the end, under repeated contact with Shi, my curiosity won over my frustration. It was just so full of potential, I had too many questions ;-;

I also learned, around that time, that Vi’s presence at each of Noa’s training was because she hoped to also be able to awaken her own Shi.

Seemed like girls had a harder time awakening Shi than boys, and nobody knew why.

“But don’t worry.” Said dad to Vi, one day that she was feeling down.

“Nobody knows why girls have a harder time awakening her Shi, that’s true, but another fact is that girls have always a very powerful Shi. Some call it balance, in that it rewards the additional efforts girls would need to awaken, others think that it’s because their Shi is more powerful that it’s more difficult to awaken, just like moving a bigger rock is harder. Vi, whatever it is, keep working, I’m sure you’ll succeed and be a bright star, okay?”

So there were more boys wielding Shi and fewer girls, but girls were more powerful than boys? Didn’t make a lot of sense if you asked me, but who was I, eh? Just the best geneticist in the world, that’s all.

Ho, and of course. Something else happened. How could I forget about that?

I had my Name Bestowal Ceremony! And I discovered something strange.

Things went like that:

Mom took me with her to the city church. Dad and the twins did not come with us as they were already there.

We entered the church and walked along the main alley, with my family and their friends right and left of it, sitting on benches. In a sense, it looked a bit like a marriage.

Marria-

No. Stop right there. Focus on your name bestowing.

...Yeah. Yeah, I’ll do that.

Marriage was a touchy subject for me at the time, so I quickly put the thought under the rug.

Then the priestess started blessing me. Blessing me in the name of Radiance.

What the fuck?

And look at the sculpture.

There, in front of stained glass, light spilling all over it, was a sculpture of Radiance.

My Radiance, the Ljósálfars that was part of ours, the Heroes, group.

...Wait-wait-wait. That oughta be a coincidence. There is no way Radiance would be worshipped as a goddess, right?

“...and by the name of our goddess, Youthful Radiance, I humbly bestow you the name of Elayna!” Ended the priestess.

So your new name is Elayna?

So it is really my Radiance?

Eh?

Eh? What?

Well, did you even hear what name you got?

Ah? No, not really. I mean. Radiance. As a goddess.

She did save the world after all. And she always had good comm.

Yes but, you know. I also saved the world?

Indeed. I don’t know what happened but it seems that only Radiance got the credit.

...Good for her? In a way, it’s a bit sad to see her face like that, but at least she’s honoured properly for her sacrifice.

...You miss her already, right?

It’s only been two months. ...Yes, I miss her. I miss everyone.

Finishing on such a bad thought would have let a bad taste in my mouth, and I asked something else.

And so, this name?

Ah? Oh yes. You’re now named Elayna!

...Elayna. I like it, it’s pretty. Still, it will be difficult to let go of my previous name. After all, I received it from everyone.

I remembered it pretty well.

Year 2338 of the united Callender

“Whaaaaat? You don’t have a name?”

I looked at her.

“No. However, I have a designation. Do you wish to know it?” I answered in the robotic tone that was my usual, so long ago.

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“Yes?” The woman’s tone wasn’t very firm.

“M0rg-Alpha-nastrfi-1425.” They all looked at me as if I was a freak.

“M0-what?” The Ljósálfars girl aw at lost.

“M0rg-Alpha-nastrfi-1425. Is there a problem with my designation?”

“Of course! How do you want us to use that in battle?” This time, an old Dvergar had spoken. His structure was interesting, it would have been a pleasure to dissect him.

“I never had difficulties using my designation in battle.”

“Well, maybe Entropic soldiers don’t have any problems, but you’re not on Entropy’s side you know?”

“Of course I know!” It was the first time I showed them emotions. And for good reasons.

“I hate Entropy. Let’s stop talking about designations and start to move already. This is a waste of time, time we could use to burn Entropy to the ground.”

“Wow easy now. We know that you’re eager to start killing those bastards, but having a name is really important you know?”

“I know!” Exclaimed suddenly the Ljósálfars girl. She had been silent until now, thinking.

“Why not Morgana?”

I looked at her and tilted my head. “Why?”

“Well, you see… Mo from m0, rg from rg, a from Alpha, and then Na from nastrfi, Mo-rg-a-na?” She looked at the others expectantly but, before anyone could say anything, I intervened.

“Morgana. I like it, it’s pretty.” And, for the first time in my life, I smiled at something else than the prospect of destroying Entropy.

Maybe this was not too bad of an idea, after?

Present days

Morgana.

Elayna Morgana, Purple-clad Lady. Doesn’t sound half bad.

It doesn’t indeed. Lost in my reminiscence, I didn’t really see time pass.

And that was all for the day. Now under the name of Elayna, I was starting to walk this world once more.

And so two months went by like that, with me sleeping in moms workshop, Meredith coming from time to time, Noa training under dad’s supervision and Vi’s gaze.

Then something happened.

***

It was 4 in the afternoon, and dad had already started cooking dinner.

Not surprising since he was making a casserole with the fresh meat he brought in today.

The aromas were slowly spreading through the house, making me regret the fact that I couldn’t eat it.

I was in my cradle in the living room with mom, half-asleep under the blanket.

Tired, mom had stopped working early, and was now writing something on a tiny chalkboard, often erasing and rewriting parts of it. If I had to guess, I would have said that she was trying to create a new potion formula.

Suddenly, the door between the living room and the hall opened violently.

“Mom! Mom!”

“Yes Noa?” Mom sprang from her seat, eyes focused on her boy.

“Do you know where Vi is? I’ve been searching for her the whole day!”

It was a Saturday and, like every weekend, the twins were free to roam the city.

Some times they wouldn’t even come home for lunch as they would eat somewhere else with their friends.

But for Vi and Noa to not be together? That was strange.

They were quite different one from another, but they always stuck together no matter what. For Noa to be alone, that felt… wrong, somehow. I sat in my cradle, now fully awake, and looked at the two of them.

“She’s not with you?” She asked back in surprise.

“N-no! I… I’m worried, mom.” He started fidgeting, as if he had something else to say.

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” The way she asked was quite soft, as she saw that Noa was in a pinch.

“W-well. I promised Vi to not tell anyone…”

“But you’ve come to me because you’re worried, right. You can tell me, I won’t punish you or your sister, I promise.” She was quite good at keeping her calm, but I could still feel her worries hidden behind her words.

“...Yesterday we found a hole in the city wall and… and Vi was very excited about it. I think she wanted to search for a flower you talked about… so today she went alone outside of the wall, but-”

“Clac!” Mom’s hands were shaking, so much that she had let her chalkboard go, the piece of black rock falling on the ground.

Dad, who happened to be walking by, passed his head through the door giving on the dining room.

“ Is everything al- what happened?” He asked, stopping mid-sentence when he saw how pale mom’s face was.

“Vi… she’s outside the city wall!” She answered with a choked voice.

“WHAT?

After that, dad went to the city guards to assemble a search party for Vi. Sadly, at the same time, mom received a message from Meredith saying that the old Wise Woman needed her urgently.

So Noa and I ended up being taken care of by Meredith’s apprentice.

“W-will Vi be alright?” Asked an anxious Noa.

“I am sure she will. After all, your little sister is quite resourceful, and your dad is a good hunter. They’ll find her in no time, and I bet she won’t even understand what the fuss is all about.” Answered Mary, her long blond hair flowing around her as she kneeled to put her eyes on the same level as Noa’s.

Noa hugged her and she hugged him back, trying to soothe his worries, but when they let go of their embrace, you could still see Noa’s fear in his eyes.

“Gah! Gah gah!” I said, flailing my arm toward him.

He tilted his head and frowned a bit.

“Doesn’t she want you to take her?”

Yes! Mary for the win!

“You think?” Answered my brother sceptically. He then proceeded to take me and, right when I was in his arms, I started rubbing my head in his neck, all the while making satisfied “Gah!” sounds.

He was surprised at first, I could feel it, but soon enough he relaxed a bit.

Goal achieved!

***

Time passed and I could feel Noa tensing again more and more with each passing hours, minutes, seconds.

Suddenly, in the distance, tormented screams started to resound and, even before Mary could react, the door giving on the hall was violently opened with a “Boom!”.

Entering in a rush was mom, screaming at Mary. “Take Noa and Ayna and go in our room upstairs!”

Following her was dad and Nicklass, with a basic stretcher in hands.

And on the stretcher… I only got to take a short look at Vi before Mary took us out of the room, but what I saw…

She was tied to the stretcher, screaming in agony as snot and tears were mixing on her face. Her left hand was black, the kind of black created by necrosis, like when a snake bit you.

Two gaping holes could be seen on the back of her hand, pus oozing out of it alongside rotten blood.

Then the door closed, cutting our view from our sister. We went upstairs, but the scream could still be heard. It was 8 in the afternoon, and the sun had fallen behind the edges of the world, letting only the moon and stars to pierce the veil of darkness shrouding us.

In our parents’ room, where Mary had taken us, my brother was holding me strongly, tears in his eyes.

Mary carried us in the bed and hugged us while putting the blanket around us, as if to create a protective cocoon.

Vi’s screams of excruciating pain slowly faded away but, as tired as we were, neither Noa nor I could close our eyes. The brief picture of Vi’s state wouldn’t exit my mind, fear and worries swirling and mixing in my head.

***

I had fallen asleep, exhaustion finally winning its battle against worries. I had woken up in the warm and protective grasp of my big brother, his eyes red of the tears he had shed.

I looked around and found Mary, asleep, Noa in her arms. You could have mistaken this for a peaceful night with siblings sleeping together, if not for the distorted face that both Mary and Noa were sporting right now, nightmares set loose, hunting in their dreams.

I took the liberty of running an ongoing analysis of Vivianne. I… may have overdone it, hence your exhausted state.

I don’t give a fuck about my state right now. Report. Please. My short, blunt way of making sentences was a clear indicator of my restlessness

She has been injected with a virulent poison of unknown origin. Seeing the lack of data we have right now, I couldn’t find anything similar. No counter-poison, nothing.

It’s a necrosis poison, targeting cells. Meredith and your mom amputated Vivianne’s left hand, where most of the poison was concentrated, but there is still some in her system. Your mom tried to counter it with a potion of her making, and seemingly stabilised her, but it’s only temporary. She paused for a bit, gathering her courage.

Mom. Vivianne is dying.

I stayed there, my gaze lost in space, dazed by Psaï explanation.

No.

Flashes of memories ran through my mind. Gaïdal Kan’s slow, painful death, poisoned by one of our own. How his body rotted and, yet, how he did not stop fighting until his very last breath, all to battle Entropy, all to save as many people as possible.

I won’t lose a family member. Not again, not ever. Psaï, let’s go.

As if she was waiting for exactly that, Psaï answered softly.

Yes mom.

My Conduit opened in full, blooming like a flower. I moved Noa’s arms with telekinesis, freeing me from his protective grasp. I saw his face distorting even more as he lost his grip on me.

I am sorry, big brother. Big sister needs me. I’ll come back soon. I felt a bit guilty to let my brother in such a state, but Vi was dying, and I wasn’t ready to mourn someone else, not so soon.

I made me float very slowly, preserving my energy, opening the doors just like I moved Noa’s arms.

Soon enough, I was in the living room.

Vivianne was laying down on the table, her eyes closed, her sleep restless. She was covered in blankets, but her left arm was stretched and tied to the table, to avoid her moving it.

From her left hand there was nothing left, nothing but a stump wrapped in bloody bandages. You could see that the poison was still ravaging her, as the blood on the gauze wasn’t red or brown, but nearly black.

She… She’s just seven, seven for fuck’s sake! I diverted my gaze from the stump, unable to cope.

I had seen lots of disabled people during the war. I never got used to it, but each time I saw a kid like that, I made myself violence to not shed tears. After all, you can’t be a beacon of salvation if you showed weakness, despair and sadness.

But now tears were rolling on my cheeks, spilling from my eyes.

Careful. Meredith is here.

I had been so focused on Vi that I had not even seen Meredith sleeping in a chair, not far from Vivianne.

Let’s get to work. At that time, I was filled with determination.