In the time since the agents left, Tina had earned a new respect for actors. Pretending to be an enthusiastic teenager had been a grave mistake. Why hadn’t she opted for the emo route instead? It would have been so much easier to feign indifference. Well, water under the bridge now. They were finally going to catch a break, and not a moment too soon.
While Tina’s nerves had been strained during the last day, Caroline’s nerves had been completely wrecked. For some reason, she handled the threat of constant surveillance about as well as fish on land. Make no mistake, Tina was not a fan of it either, but at least she didn’t mentally collapse.
Hopefully, their potential watchers would not associate Caroline’s apathetic behavior with anything more suspicious than PMS. The worst part was actually not knowing if they were actually being observed or not. Perhaps they were just experiencing the effects of nocebo from their paranoia.
They were currently headed for Britney’s place by horse cart. Unfortunately, the autumn rain had wrestled control of the skies. Because the cart had no roof, they were draped in heavy raincoats with warm clothes under.
As for why they were headed to Britney, Tina wasn’t entirely sure. Apparently, Caroline had come up with some sort of scenario they would follow. In said scenario, Tina would already know most of what was happening, so Caroline had been unable to serve her a full round of exposition without raising suspicion.
From what she had gathered of the scenario, Tina was only supposed to stay for a week with Caroline. The week was now up, and they were visiting Britney before Tina was handed over to someone. Who? Caroline hadn’t told her.
She put her hand on Caroline’s shoulder, trying to calm her former classmate. “Your shoulders are stiff as a board. Relax, we’re safe now,” she tried comforting her.
Caroline turned to her with tired eyes. “I guess we are,” she hesitatingly agreed. “I’ll do my best to put my stress aside.” It was not a very convincing statement, but there was little Tina could do to help, except maybe distract her thoughts.
“Now that we’re no longer under constant surveillance, can you tell me what the plan is?” she asked curiously.
“Ah, I’m really sorry for keeping you in the dark,” Caroline looked apologetic.
Tina waved her apology away. “You had very good reasons outside your control, so there’s no reason you should feel sorry about that.”
The older woman nodded and released a long sigh. “I need to start with some background information. You remember Janet in our class?”
Tina did indeed remember Janet. She had probably forgotten half of Martin’s classmates, but Janet was not one of them. The freckled girl had been something of an oddity. She was a unique person, not fitting any of the classic stereotypes. It was just as likely she would spend time mingling with the cool girls as she would be completely drowning in a book. She had a real talent for dancing, both choreographing and performing, something she demonstrated with new partners every year during the school’s talent competition. Martin hadn’t gotten to know her well at all, so her personality remained mostly a mystery to him.
“You see, she managed to discover magic on her own,” Caroline stated.
Caroline went on to explain how Janet had shared the secret with her closest friends, and then the group of initiates had slowly expanded. Some awakened magic of their own, some did not believe her. Only the believers remained in the group.
For some reason, Tina felt a bit of sting upon realizing how close she had been to discovering magic during her childhood. Well, close in some sense of the word, at least: Several of her classmates had been among the chosen, but it was fairly unlikely any of them would have reached out to him. He had not maintained a friendship with any of them, outside the minimum expected of classmates.
The older woman pulled some wet strands of hair out of her eyes and continued her tale. During middle school, their group was approached by an agent of the Council. The agent, a girl in her forties, had been quite friendly and shared a lot of relevant knowledge with them. First and foremost, she had taught them how the Veil worked and forbidden them from inviting or even displaying magic to anyone outside the group. According to her, they would not be punished because they were unaware of the Veil, but now that they were, any further transgressions would have severe consequences.
“Ever since middle school, our group has stayed in contact. Mostly on facebook these days. Some have moved and one died. Patrick, if you remember him. He returned to his homeland once the civil war was over, but it was not safe…”
Tina vaguely recalled Patrick. He was a refugee from Lebanon, and quite good at socializing with girls, unlike most boys in Primary School. And now, apparently, he was dead. She felt no sorrow: They hadn’t met since Middle School, and even then they hadn’t actually known each other. Her only thoughts on the subject were that it might have been useful to check Facebook every now and then. Now, that was no longer an option without leaving a digital paper trail leading back to herself.
Caroline seemed to feel some sadness telling about his death, but it was somehow dulled. Tina caught the impression that this was quite a long time ago, at least ten, so any emotional scars had partially faded by now.
“The rest of us gather monthly, mostly for social purposes. Britney is, as you have probably guessed, a part of the group. The reason we’re going to her is that she is the one living closest to me, and I want to ask her for a ride in her car the rest of the way. I could have asked her to pick us up at home, but I don’t want to give our observers more information to work with than strictly necessary.”
That made sense. Having said that, Tina would not be surprised if the Council knew of these monthly gatherings. For someone so hellbent on protecting the secret of magic, a group such as Caroline’s seemed like a wildcard they ought to keep their eyes on.
“So, the short version is that we’re headed for the monthly reunion,” Tina summarized, “Then what?”
Caroline looked a bit unsure. Well, not looked, more like felt. Tina could hardly make out her face under the raincoat hood.
“I’m afraid that step of the plan is a bit fuzzy,” she admitted, “I intend to tell the others of your circumstances and hope that one of them decides to help hide you.”
“Are you sure it’s wise to reveal everything?” Tina asked. “Not that I have a better plan, mind you...”
Caroline turned towards Tina with a look that reminded Tina of motherly concern. “I’m not certain, though I can’t abide the alternative: Throwing a fourteen-year-old girl out on the street. Well, that or keep you in danger by having you stay at my house. At some point, our cover will be blown.”
Tina couldn’t argue with that. In addition, the days would only get darker and colder, had no idea how she would survive living on the streets or in the forest on her own.
Everything she owned was in a suitcase on the back of the cart. Almost all of it consisted of the clothes Caroline had generously donated.
They rode in silence for a while, allowing the sound of raindrops to reign supreme. By the time they arrived at Britney, about half an hour later, Tina was chilled to the bone.
Like Caroline, Britney lived on a farm. Unlike Caroline’s farm, the stables and horse enclosures seemed to have actual gates which prevented the horses from coming and going as they pleased. The farm itself seemed to be a bit more modern and a lot bigger. Even with Tina’s severely limited knowledge, she could tell that there was room for at least twenty horses in the big building.
Caroline sent Tina to the door of the main building with the suitcase while she brought the horses inside the stables. Tina hesitated a moment before ringing the doorbell. It took only a few moments before a brunette opened. Despite the twenty years that had passed, Tina instantly recognized her. It obviously helped that she knew who it was in advance, but even without that, she was reasonably sure she’d recognize Britney. Yes, she was certainly older, but apart from looking more mature, her face remained virtually unchanged.
“Hello there, how can I help you?” Britney asked, unsure what a teenage girl was doing at her doorstep.
Tina decided to keep the gig up a bit more. “I’m with Caroline,” she explained, smiling. “Aunty is putting the horses away.”
Britney peered through the heavy rainfall, barely making out the horse cart, now without any horses attached. She probably wondered why Caroline hadn’t mentioned this in advance.
This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.
“All right,” she recovered, “Come inside, you look soaked.”
A few minutes later, Caroline entered without knocking. Tina was sitting inside in a comfy chair covered with a blanket and a cup of steaming tea in her hands. Britney certainly knew how to pamper her guests. Her host hadn’t asked her anything much, delaying the curiosity until Caroline arrived.
“Hi, Aunty,” Tina called out from her quite comfortable position as her guardian entered the living room. Caroline’s expression could best be described as deadpan.
“Do you want a cup of tea or coffee?” Britney called out from the kitchen. Caroline called out her preference for coffee and lowered herself onto the couch, borrowing a blanket herself.
Britney arrived from the kitchen with a tray containing two cups, and some biscuits. She claimed the other half of the couch.
“You’re much earlier than I expected,” she exclaimed to Caroline. “Care to do the introductions?” she asked with an amused smile. It was obvious the two of them had their own set of internal humor.
“Actually, I’m her secret love child,” Tina interjected before Caroline could answer.
Britney looked at her in shocked disbelief. It took only a second for Caroline’s giggling to erupt into full-blown laughter, and about as long for Britney to understood she had been tricked. She joined in on Tina’s giggling. Caroline’s laughter was just too contagious.
Caroline finally managed to calm herself. “I think I’d have preferred that scenario over our current situation,” she said while wiping away tears from her laughter.
“Britney, it is my honor to reunite you with our classmate Martin, featuring his most recent makeover,” she explained, in a clearly exaggerated manner.
Britney was entirely unconvinced. Tina sensed a slight hint of irritation, probably at how far Caroline was stretching the joke. The brunette decided not to give Caroline up for now and instead focus on the younger girl. “Perhaps it’s better that you introduce yourself,” she suggested, “since my friend seems to be preoccupied with all the jokes in the world.” She sent a casual glare towards said friend.
Tina tried to serve the most serious expression she could summon: “I’m afraid she’s actually speaking the truth. A very truncated version, but not in any way false. It might help adding that magic is involved and that I’m not voluntarily in this body.”
Britney looked back to Caroline, still in a state of disbelief.
Half an hour and a full explanation later, she was much more amiable. She even found it proper to launch jokes of her own. “So, Martin, or rather, Tina. Feeling in touch with your feminine side?”
“I’d say,” Tina answered without missing a beat, “at least if having my first period counts towards that goal.”
Britney failed to hide her surprise. “You’ve had your period?” she asked, more disbelieving than amused.
“I’m reasonably sure that’s what the bleeding from my vaginal opening is called,” Tina kept up their little game.
Britney looked back at Caroline, who shrugged with a smile. “That was my reaction, too,” she offered.
It was evident that while Britney had accepted the explanation rationally, she faced a serious challenge connecting the facts emotionally. Then again, unlike Caroline, she hadn’t seen it happen.
“Forgive me for asking directly: Is this a secret desire of yours or something?” she glanced at Tina again. She had always been the more direct of the two, not afraid of stating her questions even if they were uncomfortable.
“You’re asking if I had a secret desire to be a woman and that Mrs. Clover’s fate-weaving somehow recognized that wish?” Tina tried to read between the lines, “The answer is no. I did not possess a conscious wish to be a woman, or to experience a woman’s point of view, prior to this incident.”
There might have been a tiny part of her that was curious during her teenage years, but that was quite some time ago. And besides, Martin’s mind had been much more occupied with getting into a girl’s pants using the more common interpretation. She decided not to openly admit that Martin at that time had had sexual fantasies featuring the other two women in the room.
Britney seemed preoccupied with formulating questions that would give her useful answers. Seizing the opportunity, Tina launched a question of her own: “I was wondering, are you a druid like Caroline?”
The brunette seemed to snap out of her daze. “You’re asking what sort of magic I have? A big, fat zero, that’s what. As you probably can tell, I believe in magic, but that is not the only requirement to awakening your own. It’s actually really fucking difficult to learn.”
There was more than a hint of frustration in her voice. She had obviously desired magic of her own and failed, and it was still a sore point. Tina hadn’t actually considered that point: She had somehow assumed that since Caroline managed it, it couldn’t be that hard. More of her prejudices on blondes showing their effect?
“She’s right, you know,” Caroline came to her friend’s rescue, “magic can’t be taught, it must be learned. You can teach someone formulas in mathematics, but not actual understanding. That is something the teacher hopes the student somehow achieves throughout the process.”
“Don’t think I didn’t fucking try,” Britney swore, “I recited mantras, meditated, focused on my desires, danced naked in the forest… None of it worked for me.”
“You actually have to do all that before you learn magic?” Tina asked somewhat troubled.
Caroline shook her head. “Those are examples of techniques that others have used to awaken their own magic. Some of them have successfully been reproduced, though none of them are reliable. You need only one to succeed, so if you’re eager enough, why not try all? Although I have my doubts about the authenticity of the last one.”
“Yeah, a big fucking lot of good that one did me,” Britney cursed some more. “Except give me a cold and hurt my feet.” Did she always have such a foul mouth?
“Let me take a wild guess: This is a rather sore topic you usually avoid when I’m not nearby?” Tina ventured.
“No shit, Sherlock,” Britney replied, more frustrated than angry. “Imagine living in a world where magic is real, only to find that you can’t access it?”
Tina wasn’t sure how to answer. She wondered why this remained such a sore point after all these years. “Yeah, well, I can sort of understand that, considering I’m in more or less the same position,” she tried as sympathetically as possible.
Britney stared at her for a moment, a bit of fatigue present in her eyes. Caroline said nothing. They had agreed in advance not to speak of Tina’s own brand of supernatural talents. Even without knowing that in advance, Tina was pretty sure she would have been able to tell that Caroline was bursting to say something.
Tina observed that Britney caught that as well, but seemed to misinterpret it. Maybe he friend had tried cheering her up a few too many times.
“I’m sorry for my excessive reaction,” Britney sighed as she looked down. She felt down, too. “It’s been some time since anyone confronted me about this. The others just avoid the topic, as if that makes things any better.”
Britney shot a glance towards Caroline. Her friend seemed to feel an intense need to stare at her coffee cup. Certainly guilty as charged.
“Well, from what I can tell, you have accomplished one of your goals,” Tina pointed out, “namely working with horses.”
Britney nodded, lightening up a bit. “Yeah, I guess that’s true,” she nodded. “It’s honestly easy to take such things for granted after a while. Also, since I don’t have magic, I can actually have neighbors closer than a mile away.”
Tina raised an eyebrow. “You have to live that isolated?” she inquired Caroline.
“Well, yes and no,” the blonde replied. “I’ll try to explain it as best I can, though I’m actually heavily borrowing from what I was told myself. You know how you can make a razor blade float on water if you’re really careful?”
The younger girl nodded. She vaguely recalled a physics experiment at some point in time.
Caroline explained that the casting magic was like balancing a razor on the surface of water: It was possible, despite the metal being heavier than water, as long as the water was entirely still. Like a razor, if you failed to perfectly balance the magic, it fell through.
“Now, imagine that every person outside the Veil is a fishing bobber dancing in the water. It creates rings in the water at irregular intervals. The further away from the bobber, the less noticeable each ring becomes, until they are virtually invisible.”
“So proximity is a huge factor,” Tina summed up.
“Yes, but here’s the deal: You can learn to make your magic float, so to speak, as long as you compensate for the incoming disturbances on the water surface,” Caroline went on. “Every person has a distinct ‘pattern’, a rhythm, if you will, for how they form rings. Live with a person long enough, and you can work magic even in their presence. Probably less powerful and elegant compared to with no interference, but not impossible. That’s why living with my ex was not preventing me from working my magic.”
“Yeah, he only prevented you from enjoying your life,” Britney added with a generous amount of acid. Caroline sent her a glance, but did not retort her assessment.
“Now, the deal about Earth’s magic field, or whatever the professionals call it, is that the constant disturbances from the fishing bobbers everywhere, no matter how distant, ensure that the water is never entirely still. Thus, all Earth magicians need to be reasonably talented in order to work magic at all.”
“And that’s probably why I can’t awaken mine,” Britney interjected again, this time with a serving of self-pity, “I would probably be able to awaken magic in another world, but in my own world? Fuck, no.”
Tina wondered how to best deal with the brunette. She felt almost bipolar in her mix of directness and self-pity, and as far as Tina could tell, she wasn’t faking it. “Maybe the two of us should go a different world then, Britney?” she tried, about half of it a joke and the other half serious.
“That would be pretty neat,” Britney smiled a weak smile. “Except that I like to stay alive, and from what I gather the odds are often not in your favor out there.” She drained the rest of her cup.
At loss of words once again, Tina decided to switch back to their original topic: “Tell me, if the ‘fishing bobber’ problem is only present on Earth, why would that be useful on other worlds where there is no Veil?”
Caroline looked considerably less certain. “I don’t quite understand that part myself. From what I have heard, it is a lot easier to cast magic on other worlds, though the more advanced magic still requires significant skill. Apparently, the skills required to weave magic on Earth despite all the interferences translate really well to advanced magic skills on other worlds.”
With no more questions of her own, Tina allowed herself to be grilled by questions from Britney on what being a girl was like. It was exhausting.