[Setting: Four boys are gathered together in some sort of discussion, not too far from where the blonde woman was posted. Three of them seem to be snickering except for one who is looking around himself, as if he is being watched. The scene starts with another boy calling his attention.]

[Off-Screen]: Patty!

[It’s revealed the boys are all sitting together, having tea. How original.]

Pattinson [Pat]: Oh, oh, wh-what happened? What did you say?

Kelvin: You did drugs before you came here again.

Pat: Little bit. [he gestures]

Dinwiddie: The bastard didn’t even offer to share. I mean, you could’ve at least said you had something on you.

Pat [twitching]: What I decide to do in a back alley on the way to commit some crimes with my be-be-bestest pals in the world is no one’s business but my own. So, we gonna do this or what?

Jameson: He’s right, in his own cocaine-filled impossible way. [pulls out his phone] Gerard is paying good money for us not fuck this up. Imma text you all the spots you need to hit. Grab what you need, get out.

Dinwiddie: Why exactly did he make us come out all the way to hicktown anyway? I mean look at these things: Guns, magnets, coolant? Most of this stuff he could afford to just get on the black market himself, wouldn’t he?

Kelvin: Not that I’m complaining.

Pat: Marbles! [the other three look at him in confusion] Wouldn’t they be like, s-s-so fun right now?

Jameson: Anyway, I don’t care why he didn’t do what you just said, but he’s already paid in advance. I can’t verify this honestly, but word on the street is he stole some incredible equipment or something from the Marhsall’s department in this kingdom. Skyforce, the Wayfarers, all of them are looking for him. I think he stole and “Experiment A.” Best guess, he’s trying to keep the heat off of himself by laying low and letting us do the dirty work. Not that it matters, no one here can stop us.

Dinwiddie: Seriously, mate. Remember that kid I told you about that I saw earlier, [he pulls out a pack of cigs], I wish he was here right now. Ol’boy could be my lighter, ha!

Kelvin: He’s not lying. I’ve been doing some scouting around in this town. There’s no one fun or anything to do here. Cocksuckers’ are boring as ‘ell. I’ll do the job, but I wish it was more entertaining than it was now. Give me some type of challenge, huh?

Jameson: Either way, we got paid. So do the job, mate. End the meeting.

[Kelvin sighs. He begins rubbing his hands together quickly, then spreads his arms out. He’s about to clap-]

Dinwiddie: Let’s go rob this flyover town and get Hell out, I say.

[Off-Screen]: Flyover!?! [Isaiah begins to land in front of the group, Batman style, with his feet gently brushing the ground. The little bird isn’t here with him.]

Isaiah: Granted, the way I just got here is a bit ironic, but we we are most definitely not rednecks. Do I look like Uncle Ruckus to you...mate?

If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.

[Dinwiddie, Jameson, and Kelvin all look in shock at the new arrival. Pattinson, tweaking, is looking up at the sky to see where he just dropped from.]

Dinwiddie [drops his cig into his cup of tea]: Bloody!-boys, that’s the bloke I was talking about earlier! It’s him!

Jameson [stands up]: Who’re you? How did you find us? Why the fuck are you even here?

Pat: Some guy just fell out of the sky! [Jameson puts his hand in his face.]

Isaiah: What’s up with Tweak there?

Jameson: Shut up! Who the Devil’s name are you? What have you come to us for?

Dinwiddie: While you’re here, can you light me up? I’m running low of fuel.

Jameson: Wait, you’re saying he actually can use flames?

Dinwiddie: Were you not paying attention when I told you the story?

Jameson: Of course, not you imbecile! No one was paying attention to you. Why didn’t you say something earlier?

Dinwiddie: But I did. You just admitted you weren’t listening...

Jameson: Fuck me! Boys stand up. And you, who the fuck are you!?

Isaiah [mocking British accent]: Well, mate, I’m glad you asked here. Up there on yonder mountain, ya’ll were getting stalked by a Marshall who found you all sippin’ tea and muchin’ crumpets. She sent me here to round you all up and answer some questions, see?

Blonde Woman [interjection]: What the hell did you just say kid?

[Back to Action]

Dinwiddie: Fuck, we got a Marshall on us! How did they find us? Did any of you blokes get tailed?

Pat: W-w-wasn't me, you arse!

Kelvin: Are we going to do something about this, or...

Jameson: Shut up, it doesn't matter anymore. [the boys all stand up, with Dinwiddie and Pat moving to either of Jameson’s sides, while Kelvin, arms still outstretched, moves to the side of the table] I don’t know who the fuck you are, or why you thought it was a good idea to come here, especially without yourself or that so called Marshall up there. But let me tell you how this is gonna go down, mate.

Isaiah: All four of you burst into “That’s What Makes You Beautiful?”

Jameson [moves forward]: No. First we’re gonna kill you here. Then, we’re gonna go up on that “yonder” hill, and kill your Marshall friend. Then after that, we’re gonna go into your little town, and raise Hell. After we’re done with all that, we’re gonna fly home and go to a pub.

Isaiah: Well, we could do that. But I really hoping you guys might be one of the talented groups from your side of the pond. I mean if you guys need instruments, I've got some guitars for you. At least try a couple of Beatle’s songs. I mean, you do have the Ringo Starr nose.

Dinwiddie: Can we kill this fucker already, please!?!

Jameson: Do you know who we are boy? Do you understand what you’ve just done? Kelvin!

[Kelvin claps his hands together. The table and all of it’s wares are sent away with a large BOOM. The shockwave sends the branches of the trees into a violent swinging motion.]

Isaiah: Oh, so that’s where that sound came from!

Jameson: It’s our meeting signal. Do you understand what’s about to happen? We’re the-

Isaiah: Stop!-it doesn’t matter. [The four boys, including Pat, are astonished.] I don’t care who you are, or what powers you have, or who you’re working for. It doesn't matter. What does matter, though, is I need to figure out which of you is the dumbest. It’s obviously not Harry here.

Kelvin: Did you just call him Harry?

Isaiah: Captain Obvious Louis here at least knows what’s happening in the moment. There’s obviously no Zayn here. I mean, you’re all white. Oh great, now I’m Captain Obvious.

Pat:I w-w-want t-t-to be Paul!

Isaiah: Okay so Liam doesn’t know what’s going on. Wrong band buddy! But he’s on cocaine, so his intellect was already shot. That just leaves...

Dinwiddie: Oh for fuck’s sake!

Isaiah: Sorry Niall, but you’re literally wearing socks and sandals. You’re definitely fourth place out of four here. But that’s good news! It means you get to get out of here. The rest of you though...

Kelvin[calmly]: That's enough. Move out the way.

Isaiah: In the words Joe Rogan: Here. WE. GO!