CHAPTER 71: RUINATION

Soren closed the door to the room carefully then leaned against it. His thoughts swirled, images of what he had just done replayed in his head constantly. Was this regret he was feeling? No, it was more so a sense of sadness—one that was directed at himself.

In reality, he should have expected this outcome, but he simply didn’t want to believe in it. Since his childhood, the only ‘help’ he had ever received from others was usually ‘help’ that required something in return. And in most cases, that something would cause him more harm than the ‘help’ he had received for it.

That was just how humans operated. Unless they had a vested interest, there was no reason for them to go out of their way to help you. Selfishness was in their DNA.

Soren didn’t mind this disgusting nature—he himself had learned to be selfish, after all. In fact, he found comfort in it. It was easier for him to relax knowing the person behind him was going to eventually stab him than if he simply didn’t know it. If he knew what the bastards wanted, he could at least form a strategy against them in advance.

And yet, this simple yet effective logic which had helped him survive throughout his teen years had been thrown out the window the moment he became entangled with Star Fate Guild. Yes, they had a vested interest in helping him. They had a reason to add him to their roster. But their goal wasn’t self-serving. They were… Actually being kind to him individually, even before they knew anything about his abilities.

So disgusting, he thought to himself once more. It was this feeling of constantly being looked after with nothing asked for in return that drove him more insane than if he had actually been corrupted by the rift. And more than that, the difference in strength between him and them, which he had been trying to shrink ever since he met them, hadn’t shrunk in the slightest. Even if he reached the first circle, he doubted he could ever defeat Myrin in combat without utilizing underhanded tricks. It bothered him how little control he had over the situation.

Since his arrival, he had constantly been paranoid—awaiting the time Myrin and the others would show him their true colors, and yet it never happened. There were moments he had disliked, such as Myrin constantly peeping in on his thoughts, or Tina’s inconsistent mood swings, but aside from that, they hadn’t done anything major to him to make him doubt their actions.

From Tyrel abandoning the mission in order to escort nameless refugees out of the forest, to Tina trying to assist in stopping the Nameless Mist from spreading in Yadria… And even now, their actions toward him have been nothing but kind. His clothing and even the Spellfocus wrapped around his arm were gifted to him with no demands of anything in return. Even after warning him to not undergo the Soul Search this early, Myrin still agreed to assist him with his selfish request and watched over him for two days straight.

These weren’t the actions of someone fueled solely out of selfishness. This was genuine kindness—they really did view him as family—at least, from his own warped perspective of what ‘family’ meant. He couldn’t imagine his own father doing a fraction of what they have done for him. He couldn’t even imagine his own former chess league doing anything that helpful either.

Since his arrival, he had been in constant thought—if he had met a different group of travelers in that forest, would they have treated him similarly? He doubted it—the dungeon explorers he had seen roaming the city were all brash and shady. Yes, appearances could be deceiving, but he could tell some of them were actual criminals in the real definition of “criminal.”

In fact, he couldn’t even fully blame them for his own circumstances. They had nothing to do with Scribe-of-Worlds or Mr. Unknown or his mysterious interactions with the rift. The Abstract Rune he had unnaturally merged with was a result of his own actions, meddling with forces he had no right to meddle with. Despite these insane circumstances, whether they had a vested interest or not, they still provided him with enough help to at least have a chance to fight against these obstacles. He doubted there was any other guild in Celestine that could have done the same for him.

I guess I am satisfied now, right? He glanced at his Soul Weapon, as if directing the question toward it. I finally have proof I can trust them, don’t I?

Even though he was angry at his circumstances as well as the growing anxiety of what he’ll have to do in this coming year, he was more angry at himself for continuing to doubt them. He needed to let go at some point… It was unhealthy to continue questioning every action they take toward him, especially since they will need to work together sooner or later. Maybe they will eventually betray him, but for now, he knew at least for the duration of this year, he had nothing to worry about.

… Especially since their mistress had sacrificed that much of her lifespan to even give him that year.

He sighed and walked down the dark, gloomy corridor. I guess they got what they bargained for. Soren had already warned Myrin on the skyship that he was a deeply distrusting person. Aside from his frustration at his ticking time bomb of a situation, his outburst was also a way for him to show them who he really was, deep inside. Maybe it was to absolve himself of guilt for distrusting them for so long in secret, or it was simply his way of letting them know what kind of person he was… He wasn’t sure.

Either way, it didn’t seem like they were willing to pursue this further. Although Tina was angry, she also seemed to understand his perspective. How kind of them, he thought in disgust while rolling his eyes.

Glancing down at his Soul Weapon, he flipped slowly back toward his status page.

Status

Name: Soren Andersen

Race: ???

Age: 23

Of course it didn’t change, he chuckled to himself. He was curious whether his emotional outburst had caused his race to shift back to being labeled as human, but fortunately or unfortunately, that turned out not to be the case.

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So the change isn’t mental, but physical? He questioned. Sadly, there was no way to know currently. The only lead he could think of was possibly contacting the Knowledge Demon and asking Him. After all, he did mention something about him being a fairy or a kind of spiritual being. But that was something he wouldn’t dare to touch until at least reaching the first circle.

I guess it’s time to visit her again… His thoughts churned to what Tina had told him before he left Myrin’s room—that the mistress was waiting for him on the upper levels of the library.

As he made his way through the abandoned labyrinthine corridors, pangs of hunger sounded in his stomach. He had completely forgotten that he had been meditating for two days straight.

I should have saved my outburst for after lunch! He just realized how awkward it will be to eat with them later.

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If he had to be honest, nothing could have prepared him for the bombshell Tina dropped on him at the end of their interaction.

Ten years.

Ten years of her lifespan had been shaved away, just so he could live for one more. Even if her lifespan was longer due to her being powerful, that was still a significant sacrifice to make.

He should have expected it. He should have at least asked her about such a thing before they had begun the accord. Even after it was all said and done, when he met Cassia back in the hallway, he should have suspected something was off. The moment Cassia heard about the accord, her frown was clearly visible.

She must have known as well… It was no wonder that the Mistress decided to put Cassia to sleep before they began—she must have known that Cassia would protest against it.

The more he thought about it, the more confused he became. Was it truly worth it? Sacrificing ten years of your lifespan for a stranger. A stranger that may be able to assist in your goal, but at the end of the day, even she was unaware of what role Soren played in the grand scheme of things.

In fact, he could end up being a detrimental factor in her plans, rather than a helpful one. Fate was not one to reveal its secrets, even to a keen pryer like Sienna. It wasn’t as if she was the one that brought him to this world, after all. She too was also a pawn to fate’s machinations.

With his head full of questions, he robotically maneuvered the tunnels until he made it back to the Library Graveyard, eventually taking the platform elevator to the highest floor where she was supposedly waiting for him.

After asking for directions, Soren finally found the head librarian. Snuggled between two enormous bookshelves was a balcony that extended out, giving view to the back streets of the library. The hustle and bustle was continuing till the evening this time, more and more preparations for the festival were happening. Leaning against the railing was the silver-haired maiden he came to know. Even under the bask of the blinding sun, her beauty was not hidden in the slightest.

Why are there so many people blessed with good looks in this guild… He almost wanted to begin doubting them again just because of this. Did they sign a contract with a demon or something? He wanted to curse the gods for being unfair.

Soren, what the hell are you thinking about? You’re also handsome! He confidently strode toward the balcony.

The moment their eyes met, his guilt spiked.

“I-uh… I came just as you requested.”

Her lips widened into a smile. “Perfectly on time. Come watch the city with me.”

Although he was confused, he decided not to question it. He stood beside her, watching the market streets flow with pedestrians and dungeon explorers heading back out from the labyrinth. The citadel’s castle walls were even more clearly visible from this angle.

Even so, he couldn’t help but feel awkward. For a while, they both simply stayed silent, overlooking the city. Soren couldn't find an exact moment to interject. This lasted until a while later, much to his relief, Sienna spoke first.

“What do you think of Celestine, Soren? Have you been enjoying your time?”

He sighed, “To be honest, I haven’t had much time to fully explore it. Myrin did take me out to sightsee two days earlier though—it was fun. The city is very vibrant.”

“I see…” She took a second before asking, “Is that all you feel?”

What does she mean by that? He wondered. His thoughts churned to everything he had experienced so far in the city. From the exotic dancers, street performers and trick parlors, to the wondrous restaurants, architecture and diverse peoples… All of it reminded him of his own home, New York City, albeit, to a lesser degree. This city was just way more fantastical.

“I guess if I had to add anything, the city feels vibrant, but there’s just something off about it? As if it’s artificial, somehow…” He wanted to compare it to plastic, but no such Vinuan words came to mind. Everyone was just… Always too happy. Even with the rough atmosphere formed from dungeon explorers heading out of the labyrinth with less members than they arrived with being a constant norm to the citizens.

“Still,” he continued, “there seems to be some changes happening that differ from the usual. The preparations for the festival are underway, and there’s also a rather jubilant air that differs from the usual… I can’t put my finger on it.”

Her smile widened as she stared out into the city below. “I see,” she said in a mellow voice. Sienna glanced at him, and once more, their eyes locked—this time, Soren could tell she was going to ask him something serious.

“Would you like to see it through my vision then?”

He frowned, “What do you mean?”

“Let me show you.” All of a sudden, clouds of stardust began to coalesce across her figure. Shocked, Soren glanced back at the library full of scholars.

“They won’t see us,” she said. “It will only last a moment for them, after all.”

Lifting her palm, a spinning white star began to form, like a glowing white string wrapping around into a ball of yarn. After it finished gathering enough light, she shoved it into his chest, just like the last time. Immediately, the bright blue sky shifted into a dark abyss, fitted with countless celestial objects and constellations.

But his vision was focused more on the earth rather than the heavens.

All life in the vicinity shifted in color, as if he was viewing the world through x-ray vision. The buildings, streets, wagons were all outlined in black and white, as if he was witnessing the world before the details were added.

“This is the World Fate I can see,” she said. “But this isn’t the important part, let me focus a bit more of my astral anima.”

As she said those words, a slight change happened to his vision. The undetailed outlines of the city began to form… Details. One’s that didn’t belong to what he had originally seen the city as.

Cracks. Countless crevices and cracks were forming on everything. Both buildings and people alike. It was as if everything was a part of a marble statue set that had been eroded for many centuries.

“What… Is this…” He had no way of understanding what he was seeing.

He glanced at Sienna, who’s body had also formed countless cracks from erosion. His heart sank. She smiled at him in a depressing way before saying:

“This is the true nature of Yarian. This is what I call Ruination. The stagnation of this world has continued for too long due to its Celestial Fate being frozen.”