CHAPTER 67: SOUL SEARCH

Soren sat in a lotus position in the area Myrin had cleared with his strange plants. His thoughts churned for a second before getting startled by Myrin.

“Before we start, I wanna confirm what you know. Are you aware that a Soul Search isn’t something most beginners look to do until they have at least three months of practice with their Soul Realm?”

Soren nodded. “Yes. I also know that once I begin this Soul Search, I won’t be able to stop until I acquire what I am looking for.”

According to what Sienna had told him briefly as well as what the Axiom Codex had mentioned, Soul Searches are a practice that all magi must go through in order to discover their affinities. Just like how one first unlocks their Soul Realm, they must enter the Three Layers of Self and look for signs that indicate what their affinities are.

However, it was easier said than done. Since your True Self resides within the deepest layer of the Heart’s Shroud, what a magi must look for needs to be the ‘Shades’ of that True Self. These ‘Shades’ manifest themselves secretly in random areas within the Three Layers, but the harder one tries to look for them, the harder it becomes to maintain your existence within.

The reason for that was simple. The ‘Shades’ of one’s self are nothing more than reflections—each one representing a single personality trait of the person. But the more a magi discovers these ‘Shades’, the more contradictions pop up, resulting in an unstable Soul Realm. Because of this, most magi limit themselves at only discovering one or two affinities—any more and you’ll simply drive yourself insane.

This however, did pose another obstacle to Soren, who was in a time crunch. He had to somehow search for his first ‘Shade’ and discover his first affinity by the end of this week. No, even that was too much time—he needed to do it in a few days so he could finish up his studying for the week and report back to the Mistress.

Myrin sighed as he shook his head. “Your impatience knows no bounds… If you had left this for after this week, you may have had more time to prepare…”

Soren closed his eyes and frowned. “I can’t wait any longer, Myrin. My time is slowly ticking—haven’t you heard about my condition? I only have one year to find another Abstract Rune, or I’ll be doomed. If I can’t progress as a magi quickly, I won’t have the strength to search for it.”

Myrin’s mouth opened slightly, as if he wanted to say something but chose not to. He sighed again and slammed his hand against his forehead. “Do what you will… I will watch over your body in the meantime here and I'll also cast a few wards around you to avoid any disturbances.

“Ah, also. Do not think for a second that I can hide what you are doing from the mistress. I am sure she already knows. Prepare to be scolded when you come back.”

Soren smiled, “Thanks, man.”

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An hour had passed and Soren had still not located his first ‘Shade’ of Self. It was interesting to say the least—he was currently located within the shallow regions of the Heart’s Shroud—the murky white fog shifted evenly around him.

His visit to the three layers was much simpler this time. Unlike before where he needed to use that tool Myrin had granted him, all he had to do this time was simply expand his Soul Realm around him, then contrast it back into his eyes. The effect was immediate—he was able to peer into the three layers like a spectator, something he couldn’t do back then until he looked past the Veil of Perception.

This however, didn’t mean there were no active threats. The three layers were still exerting their influence on him—he had already seen countless new illusions within the Heart’s Shroud that he had to ignore. The same could be said for the countless thoughts springing randomly within his Echo of Mind.

Most shocking of all, however, had to be the actual attacks he was receiving—this was something new. When he first arrived in the Echo of Mind, a tempestuous storm kicked in immediately, and then, a rain of lightning showered above him. This wasn’t fake lightning either—it was real. If he hadn’t immediately focused and created thought bubbles around them, he would have died. And it didn’t stop there either—he was bombarded by waves, tornadoes, wind blades, and occasionally, even whirlpools forming beneath his feet, all of which formed randomly without any echoing from his own thoughts—something that was clearly contradictory.

Eventually he got the hang of it and managed to speed up his focus, leading him to sink into the Heart’s Shroud, but respite wasn’t found there either. Illusions of Spirit Beasts, Magi, and Even other Phantasms he had seen in the nightshade raid continued to show themselves—all of them were hostile. And what’s worse was the fact that he couldn’t even fight back against them—if he tried, it would only add weight on himself within the fog.

Why the hell did Myrin not warn me about this, he cursed, causing the fog to weigh a bit more. He took a deep breath to calm himself. There’s no way he wouldn’t—this situation must not be normal.

Nevertheless, by the nature of these illusions, he had to ignore them—an answer he didn’t mind at all. Everytime the fog stirred, he simply turned around and left without even waiting for what might manifest. Eventually, he reached the bottom. The ethereal golden light beaming beyond the murky fog became clearer and clearer until he finally reached it.

His True Self.

The Records remained the same as his last visit—its shimmering golden pages flickered like flames as it levitated mysteriously. A thin layer of fog surrounded its form. If he were to be honest, he was hesitant about reaching this place again—especially because of the corruption from the rift that attacked him last time.

I wonder if that spatial crack is still there… The thought reminded him of the pain from the ravings and whispers that encroached upon his mind—the weight of the fog rose once more.

Focus, Soren…

Taking another deep breath, he approached his True Self. Just as he thought, it had remained at the same page he was on last time—the revelation it showed him.

The reason why he was here was simple. After searching through his three layers for an entire hour and seeing no results, he suddenly got an idea. If his True Self was The Records, then could he use his True Self in the same way? After all, it did display information to him last time through the book itself, so it wasn’t that far-fetched of an idea.

He took a deep breath and grabbed the ancient tome—its radiant warmth entered his ethereal palms. Soren closed his eyes and imagined the thought just like he would usually do. Just when he thought that his idea was a failure, his Soul Weapon’s pages broke apart into countless tiny golden butterflies that swam into his eyes.

The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.

He did it. He could see the unseen. [Eyes of the Fairy] had activated. He almost couldn’t believe it—his True Self was truly representing itself as The Records, his Soul Weapon.

All around him, the fog had dissipated. In its place, countless colors and fractal shapes flooded his vision. Each fractal shifted chaotically, but he could tell something was inside of them—his memories. Every memory he had ever conceived was being represented here.

I need to leave. NOW. Without any hesitation, he held firmly to the ancient tome and channeled his thoughts into wanting to leave the Heart’s Shroud. His visage turned incorporeal once more as his plane of existence shifted to that of the Echo of Mind, one layer above where he was previously.

He sighed in relief. The worst didn’t happen.

Because of his [Eyes of the Fairy], being able to see his memories aso meant being able to see the corrupted whispers of the rift. And his intuition wasn’t wrong. Just moments before his visage disappeared, he spotted countess rune tentacles heading his way—the corruption had noticed his presence and was itching to invade his mind once more. Luckily, he reacted fast enough.

Soren glanced down at his True Self which was still sitting in his arms, wide open. His [Eyes of the Fairy] had deactivated, but the Soul Weapon itself hadn’t. If he had to be honest, what he just did was a gamble that he wasn’t sure would pay off. Afterall, the last time he came here, he wasn’t even able to move it, but now, he could take his True Self with him as he roamed across his three layers of self. It was fairly odd, but he decided to ignore it.

I have to find one of the ‘Shades’ quickly… Although only an hour passed for him here, he was still unsure how much time was passing in reality. Myrin said it was random—for some, time passed normally—for others, it was much more distorted. And the effect varied every time a person entered the three layers. Not to mention, his [Eyes of the Fairy] also had a distinct effect on time, so he needed to be careful when using it.

He sighed as he glanced around the chaotic storm erupting around him in the Echo of Mind. He focused his thoughts and formed more thought bubbles.

Let’s begin the search.

First, he activated [Eyes of the Fairy] and focused his vision on mapping the layer of self. The last time he arrived here, he was fairly curious as to how far each of these manifested realms extended. For the Echo of Mind, the ocean went as far as his eye could see. Sadly, he had no time or reason to wander around that time.

His Soul Weapon activated [Record] and began mapping his route as he ran across the endless ocean. Occasionally, he would need to change routes to avoid waves, storms and attacks from illusory lightning. But even after another two to three hours, nothing had changed. He had found absolutely nothing to show for his efforts.

Sighing, he let himself go and laid down on the ocean-like floor. What am I doing wrong? He felt as if he was walking in a loop.

And he wasn’t wrong.

Glancing down at the map in his Soul Weapon (True Self), a glowing line showed his route. He had truly been going in circles this entire time.

“Is this some sort of trick or is this supposed to happen?” He wasn’t sure. He cursed his lack of knowledge—if he had spent more time researching the three layers, maybe he would have known this.

But there was no point in considering what-if scenarios. Wasting precious time without knowing what his affinities are would only hurt him in the long run. He needed to figure something out quickly.

He frowned as he glanced down at the map—small cloud and lightning icons were shown to him as they moved across the Echo of Mind. It wasn’t hard to know what those were. They were the countless thought storms manifesting from his own chaotic thoughts.

To think my Soul Weapon could [Record] things like this too…

His thoughts continued to echo out as he sat there, pondering what to do next. He had searched every nook and cranny of his Echo of Mind, and he had found nothing.

Let me try the Veil of Perception next…

Even then, It felt as if he had spent two-to-four days and yet nothing had changed. Mapping the Veil of Perception had shown the same result. Even as his reality shifted into countless forms and environments, the map itself showed a clear boundary and that his movements were the same—a circle. There was also the time dilation aspect—his perception of time tended to shift and twist on its own in this realm just like it did last time. He was no longer sure how long he had been Soul Searching.

With no choice left, he decided to move back to the Heart’s Shroud, regardless of the danger, and yet, even this final layer of self had nothing but illusions of bad memories and mirages of Phantasms hungry to spill his blood.

His ‘Shade’ of self was nowhere to be found.

“This is bullshit…” He almost couldn’t believe it. Even though Myrin said that finding them was tricky, it should not be this difficult, especially since unlike normal magi, he was able to cheat and use his Soul Weapon’s abilities to aid himself. Even after mapping out every layer completely, he found nothing.

“Do I just not possess any affinities?” The thought made his heart sink. He didn’t want to believe it. But it also held some merit—his circumstances were anything but normal after all. Not only was his Soul Chain and the Runic Existence it orbits missing, but even his True Self had somehow manifested as his own Soul Weapon. It seemed like he was destined to be a weirdo compared to others in every aspect.

Although the thought made him chuckle, he couldn’t help but get worried.

Calm down, Soren… He didn’t know how many times he had said those words by now.

“There has to be something I am missing…”

He decided to review his maps again. His Echo of Mind was once again showing the same clouds and storms—his Soul Weapon was tracking their movements. As for the Heart’s Shroud, the map was showing different icons of manifested illusions of his memories. The Veil of Perception was also no different aside from the fact that it was the shape of the terrain itself that was changing.

All of it remained just as he had suspected it would. There was nothing suspicious that he could point to.

“Just where the hell is this shade at…”

But that’s when he realized something. Why… Were his maps even changing in the first place? Why were they showing these indicators and icons?

The more he thought about it, the less it made sense. His maps were only supposed to update themselves if his [Eyes of the Fairy] focused on those details. After all, seeing the unseen didn’t mean seeing everything that was unseen—Soren needed to focus on the thing he wanted to see most—in this case, it was the terrain itself, not everything on the terrain.

And that wasn’t the only oddity. Although his mapping ability was very meticulous, it never updated on its own. When he was using it to navigate the Illusionary Barrier in the Feylith Forest, he had to constantly reuse [Eyes of the Fairy] to update their route as the barrier shifted things around then use [Record] to store this new information. But what he was witnessing right now was different. The icons showing where the storms were moving in the Echo of Mind were shifting on their own—this was information he hadn’t chronicled himself, and it was happening in real-time.

“[Eyes of the Fairy] isn’t even active right now and it’s still chronicling and showing me changes in the maps….”

And that’s when it struck him. A thought so ridiculous, it would have made him laugh if not for the fact that the evidence supported it strongly. And most curious of all, his own Soul Weapon (True Self) agreed with this conclusion.

New Revelation Recorded: [The Only Shade] (Mystery)