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The Tent: A collection of short stories
"Simon and Piper": Funhouse: Chapter 4

"Simon and Piper": Funhouse: Chapter 4

Sometime later

Piper is awakened by a sudden explosion of light hitting her closed eyelids. She blinks rapidly, trying to see. From high above, Piper watches as Simon is led on a rope to the center of the tent. So they were still inside the tent? But how?

The insane clown, sans his right eye, yanks hard on the rope encircling Simon’s neck. Simon’s wrists are also bound. He yanks on his bindings, unfazed by the cruel clown leading him across the floor. Piper repositions her body so that she is kneeling on the net’s ropes. She reaches an arm through and waves at Simon.

“Simon, I’m here. I’m right here, baby. I’m here.”

Simon glances up and spies Piper, a weak smile crinkling the corners of his eyes and drawing up one side of his mouth.

“I see you, baby! Although, I am a little tied up at the moment. I’ll get to you as soon as I can.”

Piper grips the net with both slender hands and peers down at Simon, unable to suppress a tiny giggle at his unexpected joke. That’s Simon. Always finding humor where there is none. Down below, the ringmaster crosses her arms over her chest and scowls discontentedly.

“Tie him to the post and drop the other one!” the ringmaster orders in a raspy voice. “So we can begin the test.”

The clown securely fastens Simon’s rope to a large pole at the tent’s center. Afterwards, he crosses to another pole and unties the rope found there--unceremoniously dropping the net holding Piper to the floor many feet below. She hits the floor hard, crying out and grasping at her right ankle. Simon pulls against his rope, trying to get at his injured wife.

“You crazy son of a bi—!”

“Be nice, Simon!” the ringmaster interrupts, raising her gold-tipped cane into the air and waving it in Piper’s direction threateningly. “You should be careful how you speak to my servant.”

Simon silently seethes, wanting to tear both the ringmaster and her clown henchman into a million tiny bloody pieces. However, she is right. For now.

The ringmaster approaches where Piper sits nursing her sprained ankle. Piper recoils as the vile woman draws closer, eyeing her with suspicion. Tapping Piper’s ankle with her cane, the ringmaster grins evilly, her eyes sparkling with purplish light. The pain in Piper’s ankle disappears. Piper looks down at her ankle in disbelief. The ringmaster turns to Simon and extends her arms in an exaggerated gesture.

“See? All better. No need to have such brutal thoughts…Coursing through your insignificant mind.”

The ringmaster twirls in a half-circle and grins widely.

“And now! The test!”

The ringmaster snaps the fingers of her right hand and two chairs appear from nowhere. She snaps her hand again and Piper finds herself being repelled backward—and onto one of the sturdy chairs. Another finger snap and a second Piper appears. Both women stare at each other in utter shock. Chains snake across the floor and bind each woman to their assigned chair. The ringmaster grins more widely and leans forward on her cane.

“And now…The fun part.”

The two chairs, and their occupants begin spinning clockwise. Forming an odd figure eight, the chairs traverse as if on a hidden track, spinning rapidly the entire time. The ringmaster and the one-eyed clown chuckle with glee, clapping their hands loudly. Simon watches in horror—knowing whatever is coming will not be good.

Once the chairs stop spinning, a large cannon rises from the tent floor. The ringmaster takes off her purple top hat and bows low in a sarcastic gesture. She cruelly meets Simon’s gaze.

“Your test will be to pick which of these two women…Is your true wife. Which one is Piper? Choose wrong…And she dies. Horribly, I’m afraid. A cannonball leaves a very nasty hole.”

“I won’t do it!” Simon bellows.

“Oh…Then, she dies right now!” the ringmaster threatens. She snaps her fingers and a lit match appears in her hand. She shrugs nonchalantly. “The choice…Is yours!”

“Just do it, Simon!” one of the Pipers says.

“Just do what she says!” the other Piper says at the same time.

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Simon looks from one identical woman to the other. He studies them both before nodding resignedly.

“Okay. I’ll do it.”

“Great!” the ringmaster says, blowing out the match. “Now, we get to play. Percy, stand behind the cannon. Be ready!”

“Yes, Master!”

Percy positions himself behind the cannon, grinning his usual insane grin. Simon tenses as he considers the implications of the game he is to play. A wrong guess could be the end of Piper.

The ringmaster grabs a chair seemingly out of nowhere and spins it around. Straddling the chair, she stares over the top at Simon.

“We shall begin the test. Each…Piper will tell you a fact about themselves. You will decide if it is either true or false. Would the real Piper lie to you? You must get two answers out of three correct, or…Well. Do you understand the rules, Simon?”

“Yes.”

“Good. And by the way…No emotions allowed. Emotions can be so telling. I’ve turned them off…So that each Piper will appear as lifelike as a piece of clay. Have fun guessing.”

Simon swallows and waits for the first Piper to speak. The lifeless mannequin of a woman turns her hazel eyes on Simon and utters a solitary solemn sentence.

“I have strong feelings for your brother,” Piper One says in a dull voice.

“Huh?” Simon says, eyes bulging. “What?”

“You heard what was said, Simon!” the ringmaster barks. “Is the statement true…Or false?”

Simon glances from one Piper to the other. His eyes shift as he tries to think of any time he has ever suspected his brother, Nate, of creeping behind his back. Never. The statement has to be false.

“It’s false. That’s a lie. Piper would never cheat on me!”

The ringmaster grins maniacally and narrows her eyes.

“Sorry, Simon. That one was true.”

Simon’s mouth gapes and he is momentarily stunned into silence.

“No! That’s a lie! You’re purposely trying to split us up!”

“I have no reason to trick you. I already have the upper hand. Time for the second round.”

The ringmaster twirls her cane in the air and the chairs perform another spinning figure eight. They stop moving again and the ringmaster rotates her head on her shoulders in boredom.

“I’m pregnant,” one of the Piper’s says, voice low and emotionless.

“Pregnant?” Simon says. "I…I think that’s—. Piper doesn’t want kids. She told me so. I don’t…I mean—.”

“What is your answer, Simon? True or false?”

Simon takes a moment to study the Piper who has spoken. Truly study her. He exhales deeply, hoping he has chosen correctly.

“It’s…True!”

The ringmaster roars with frustration and whirls her black cane in the air. The chairs commence their dizzying spin a third time. So he was right. Piper is pregnant. One more question. Best two out of three. No pressure.

“Final round!” one-eyed Percy cackles from his spot behind the cannon.

Simon swallows yet again and his stomach muscles grow tense. The ringmaster’s appearance once again becomes that of the old hag, her black talons tapping the wooden chair back.

“Final round,” she says in a snakelike hiss.

“I married you, because I thought I was pregnant. If I had not thought so…I might have married Nate instead. He’d already told me he loved me. The night of Sheridan’s party. He never understood why I chose you. He said he could offer me a better life. More security. For the baby’s sake, I had to tell him ‘no’. But then, there was no baby. I love Nate. But I love you too!”

Tears pool in Simon’s eyes and he bites down on his lower lip. He studies the Piper who has spoken very hard. With a trembling voice, he turns in the direction of the ringmaster.

“That statement…Is false!”

A rumble like thunder feels the tent and the ringmaster bellows in anger. Purple ribbons of electrical energy spark and ripple within the tent's massive interior. Leaping to her feet, the ringmaster swipes her chair away and points threateningly at Simon.

“No! No! NO!”

Percy grimaces and backs away from the cannon, his one good eye warily bouncing everywhere.

“NOOOOO!” the ringmaster yells.

As Simon watches, the ringmaster grows in size, her bones snapping and popping. The long talons on her hands stretch as well, growing to the size of large kitchen knives. The enraged ringmaster storms towards the two Pipers, intent on murder. However, her enormous body slowly dissolves, becoming faint like smoke. She swipes at the closest Piper, presumably the real one, but her talons pass through the innocent woman. The ringmaster whirls on Percy, needing vengeance and searching for an easy target. Waving a hand, the ringmaster sends Percy flying through the air—cannon and all. Then, she turns on Simon. She points a black talon in his general direction.

“It has been a long time since anyone has beaten my tests. You were lucky. I will not make it so easy next time.”

The ropes around Simon’s neck and wrists drop off at the same instant that the second Piper disappears. A strong gust sweeps through the enormous tent, blowing around anything which isn’t tied down. The wind is so strong, it topples Piper’s chair. The purple electrical flashes intensify, and the air within the circus tent grows thick with the smell of smoke and sulfur. A piercing wail goes up. The tent’s flaps move as if in a hurricane, whipping madly back and forth.

Simon races to Piper’s side, as she struggles to free her wrists from the chains. As he bends down beside her, the chains pop open. The shrill screaming of the angry ringmaster pounds against Simon’s eardrums. He presses his left ear against his left shoulder, to block out some of the sound, and helps Piper to her feet. Husband and wife hurry toward the front of the tent—hoping they won’t fall into nothingness.

The whipping tent flaps reveals a thin strip of daylight. Simon puts on the speed, pulling Piper along behind him. Grabbing Piper around the waist, Simon launches himself from the tent.

============================================================================

Beep, beep, beep

Simon slams a large hand down on the snooze button of his late grandfather’s bronze alarm clock. He stretches and turns over on his back, eyes wandering toward the ceiling. Narrowing his eyes, Simon sits up on the bed. Piper calmly sits up beside him.

For what amounts to a small eternity, Simon and Piper stare around the room. They turn to each other with wary expressions.

“We are so taking a plane,” Simon says.

“Yep,” Piper agrees.

“What about your parents’ cake?”

“We leave early enough…We can order one.”

End Story One