“Revenge is a never-ending cycle that’s hard to break.”
***Deep Space***
***Lisandra***
“I can’t believe that this is happening,” I mumble and take another bite from the protein bar while I study the two children in front of me. Now that I am looking at them in a different light, they look very similar to how my sisters and I looked when we were smaller. Well, just that they aren’t skinny or starved in any way.
Min and Sam are sitting across from me on the other side of the table. In the last two days, they often spent time with me in the mess hall. Answering my questions seems to amuse them. Not that I am not grateful for their efforts at including me in the family.
Silith spent most of her time with mothering Antioch, who is currently confined to the medical bay. It seems like regrowing a lost limb isn’t fun. I have yet to find out how the relationship between a man and a woman works. Silith tried to evade direct answers when I asked her. She compared it to having a sister, but I have a feeling that there is more to it.
Sadly, I didn’t get to see much of Antioch and Silith. Not that I want to see the male, man? It still feels like he abducted me. It’s hard to believe that all of the people on that station were evil. I even thought of some of them as my friends. I wince at the painful memory.
It will take a while to untangle the knot of conflicting feelings within me. Intellectually, I know that something extremely shady went on at the station. Why else would the guards be needed? Why else would they tell me such lies? All that time I thought that the messages from G.O.D. were just figments of my imagination, caused by the nano-plague.
I would even be inclined to cling to that lie, if it weren’t for the fact that Silith is still alive. She even knew the old handshake which we had made up just between the two of us. It’s definitely her and not an impostor.
“She zoned out again.” Sam waves his hand, drawing my attention.
Returning my attention to the kids, I clear my throat. “I am sorry. We were talking about the V.C. How is it that the two of you aren’t some sort of all-mighty, ethereal beings? From what you have told me, you should have had more than enough time to develop far beyond the material universe. Like, augmenting your minds with perfect memories and the such. I am just wondering. Because, from your description, the people of the V.C. seem to be pretty flawed.”
They furrow their foreheads and look at each other as if I asked an uncomfortable question. Min nods and looks at me. “Who says that we didn’t?”
Narrowing my eyes, I look at each of them in turn. “Then, why are you here, like this...” I gesture at them, indicating their bodies. They also don’t seem to be any smarter than Silith, Antioch and me.
Sam massages his chin as if he had a beard and regards me, thinking of the best way to answer the question. “Take the human mind and give it limitless potential. Allow it to remember every detail and to think about a thousand things at once. What would happen?”
“I- I-” I try to imagine what I would do. “I would do whatever the hell I want. I would fulfil all my wishes, learn everything I can. Make it perfect. I would go back and punish the S.C.”
“And once it is perfect?” Min asks questioningly. “What would you do once you have achieved everything achievable? What do you do once you have done everything there is to do?” Her eyes widen. “Knowledge is power. What happens once you are so smart that you might actually be a god?”
I bite my lower lip.
Sam drums on the table, using his open palms. “You either get bored, or you become something totally inhuman. Why would you still be interested in punishing the S.C.? They are nothing more than an anthill to you. You could wipe them out by bringing down your foot. But why should you do it? The ants don’t bother you unless they are in the way of some other, greater project. Sane minds don’t wipe out a certain kind of bug, just because they bothered them in the distant past. There is a faction of those people in the V.C. We call them the Blue.”
“The Blue?” I ask.
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Min smirks. “It’s actually a joke, since nobody knows what they would call themselves. You know, the human mind isn’t really made for perfection. Most people who try to augment their mind go insane or their minds simply shatter in the process.”
“I thought that my mind is already very close to that?” I answer. “I can remember everything I want to. I can also make a lot of calculations which other organic people apparently can not, not even with the help of computers.”
Min stretches herself. “I am not talking about the puny memory augments you and we have access to right now. Those are actually designed to protect your human mind. I know that you think that you are actually doing it yourself, but those are just subroutines which do the work for you. They were designed as helpers. When you wish to solve a complicated formula, the nano-tech in your brain detects that and makes the calculations for you, then it spoonfeeds the solution to the routines which are your actual mind, your personality. It takes the burden off of the actual you.”
Sam takes over. “There are people in the V.C. who really tried to go beyond the human boundaries, but there is only so much you can do before you aren’t really human anymore. When we uploaded our minds to the V.C., we were no better than standard humans. A human has wishes, hopes, and dreams. Augment your mind to the point that nothing is a mystery or an obstacle, and you take that away. The Blue did that, and all of them are just sitting around, staring off into empty space, pondering the universe. Some say that they are currently trying to unravel the meaning behind our existence. Others are of the opinion that the Blue simply glitched out in their attempt to become something more.”
“Yep. Long ago, when a computer system crashed, it showed the user a blue screen. It often happened when you did something which the software couldn’t handle. The people who augmented themselves beyond what a human mind can deal with are just like that. That’s why we call them the Blue.” Min nods. “Creepy fuckers those are...”
Sam places his hands in a praying gesture. “Well, and without those augmentations, even the most talented and interested of people are limited in what they can do. A person doesn’t simply walk off and learns everything there is to learn, even with unlimited time on their hands. Everyone has interests. Things they love and things they hate. Why would you spend twenty years of subjective time learning about wormhole-theory, if you absolutely hate the subject? Many members of the V.C. prefer wasting their time with things they like, staying simpletons.”
Min nods. “Yep, and let's assume that you actually want to learn everything there is to learn. Even if you are that kind of person. How would you do it without mind and memory augmentations? Without them, there would be a point at which your mind can’t handle all the facts anymore. Your brain would pop because of information overload. That’s why many people master only one or two subjects and ask others if they have a question… or they go to one of the few Blue who still react to outside stimulus.”
“Though, that’s actually the last thing one would do. Most of the answers you get from a Blue are rather… cryptic.” Sam chuckles.
I ponder their explanation. It’s strange, but it makes sense. If I was a bug and had a bug’s troubles with birds, what would happen if I found a way to turn into a human? Would the human me still be interested in wiping out all those evil birds? The birds would be of no concern to the new human me. “I think that I understand where you are coming from. So, the people who will join this future faction of ours, they will be closer to a normal human than to these Blue you mentioned?”
Shifting in my seat, I run a hand through my blonde hair and study my hand. It’s still thin, but there is actually some flesh on it. My body didn’t develop exactly like Silith’s. Her shape is voluptuous, sensual and feminine, while I am more on the athletic side with a small chest. Yet, I don’t feel inferior to her.
My blue eyes and aristocratic features are my own, and I like the way I am. I know that Silith wouldn't agree with my chiseled features. Actually, I am pretty sure that she will try to help me with 'improvements' as soon as she finds the time. That's simply the way she is.
It’s good that my class doesn’t allow me to play around with my body. I wouldn’t know what to do with the ability. Being a Mentor is much better anyway. I get all these nifty mental upgrades. After passing out twice during my rescue, I dumped all my skill points in Mental Fortitude. It promised to prevent such an embarrassing thing happening again. I should no longer black out because of shock or stressful situations.
“That reminds me, how are your stats, Lis?” Min asks.
“Oh, they are growing nicely, now that I have so much food. My Mental Growth is at one hundred percent, thanks to my class. My Physical growth is at sixty-two percent, but that’s just a matter of time as I understood it,” I answer cheerfully.
The twins exchange a quick glance.
“I’ll go and get Silith. Maybe she should talk with Lis, before she reaches seventy-five.” Min slides from her stool and toddles towards the exit. “Better to have a meeting before this turns into a relationship drama!”
Sam leans over and waves at his sister. “Yeah, I’ll stay here and watch her.”
Blinking, I turn my attention to Sam. “What are you two talking about? What happens at seventy-five percent?”
He looks at me and whistles, looking at the walls, then at the food in front of me, then back at me. “Well, shit. Whatever. You are a big girl. Once your Mental and your Physical Growth are both over seventy-five percent, you are considered as an adult and the system unlocks certain instincts… better to say that your body starts producing hormones which make you aware of the other-”
“I get it!”
He continues anyway, just to make sure that I understand. “The initial shock of experiencing those feelings for the first time can be hard. It’s better to be prepared. Ah, don’t worry. Actually going through puberty is much worse. We are only worried because there is just one guy on the ship who could draw your attention. Silith seems like the possessive type. So as Sis said, no need for drama.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “What about you? You are also a guy, aren’t you?”
He looks down at himself as if he has to actually check the correctness of my observation. “Errr...” He slides a little further away from me. “Believe me, we don’t want to go down that route.”