“Think, Dee, think! “ I urged myself. There had to be a way.

Unfortunately, whenever you need to think about something quickly, the mind will inevitably come up blank. I felt like I was in 8th grade again, doing my Biology test and the teacher was hovering above me, reading my answers. My brain would immediately go into overdrive, questioning everything I have written down as answers and promptly forgetting every single thing I have ever learned about photosynthesis.

This was, of course, much worse than getting a bad mark on a test. The Vineslasher looked like it would fuck me up for good. My fear grew even bigger as one of its tentacles suddenly snapped towards the woods, and dragged a pheasant by its legs towards the plant’s main body.

“Holy shit. ”

The poor bird was desperately flapping its wings and clucking at the vine trying to escape, but it was useless. Soon, it disappeared in the bright yellow light that glowed at the bush’s core.

A chill went down my spine. I imagined myself being captured by the plant, rendered immobile by the thorny vines. That wouldn’t be great for my health for sure.

I sat there for a few minutes, hoping the bush wouldn’t sense me. I occasionally peeked around the corner to monitor the situation. Slowly a plan started to form in my head, and I quietly crawled back to the front of the cabin.

While back inside, I ransacked the place trying to find my next weapon.

My logic was fairly simple. This thing was a plant. A very freaky, disgusting plant, but a plant nonetheless. What was something almost all plants hated more than anything? The answer was, of course, fire.

For anyone familiar with teenagers and PE class lockerrooms, making a flame thrower is a rather trivial thing. All you need is an aerosolized can of something like cheap deodorant or hairspray, a lighter, and the understanding and acceptance that you might give yourself free first-degree burns on your hands and arms.

My search turned successful when I found a can of bug spray under the kitchen sink. I shook it to see how much of the stuff was left and tested the nozzle. It was a stroke of luck that it seemed fairly full and easy to use. Sometimes these things would get stuck after the chemicals dried, but this wasn't the case. The cabin also had a small basket of disposable lighters, and I picked out the one with the biggest flame.

The possibility of dropping the can worried me. It was pretty bulky and my hands weren't exactly big. For a wild second, I contemplated taping the thing to my hand, but that was dumb. I had to make something that would help me keep it with me.

I took an old sheet and tore it into wide strips. Remembering a Home Economics class from sixth grade, I looped the strip into a crochet chain, long enough to wrap diagonally around my torso, and secured it with a knot. A carabiner would have been much better for this purpose, but I had to work with what I had. Next, I ripped one of the strips in half, wove it through one of the chains and wrapped it around the can, tight enough that it would stay in place, but not too tight so it would be hard to put back.

Sure enough, I had a bug spray holster. I eyed my handy work and a description popped up.

Bedsheet Holster (Trash)

This is the worst holster the Universe had ever seen. Congratulations!

"It gets the job done," I mumbled defensively.

I dismissed the prompt and practised taking the can out and putting it back on. After a few tries and minor adjustments, I was satisfied.

With all that done, I was ready to barbeque.

Before going back out there, I quickly checked my hit points and saw that I had managed to regenerate 3 HP, bringing me up to a total of 30 HP. I hoped that would be enough. Images of my limp body being slowly digested by that monstrosity flashed through my head and shook me up. I had to learn to control my imagination.

“Come on, Dee. You can outsmart a fucking bush. ”

The little pep talk gave me just enough encouragement to leave the cabin and get back to sitting crouched at the corner, my little hatchet in hand, and monitoring the Vineslasher. I couldn’t see the pheasant anymore, but the bush occasionally sent some of the bird’s feathers flying from its glowing core. It reminded me of a cat throwing up hairballs after a successful hunt.

Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation.

A System notification went off, pulling me out of thinking about increasingly more gross scenarios involving wisps of my hair and my phalanges shooting up in the sky.

Due to your actions, you have earned an increase in an attribute: +1 Intelligence

I wasn’t sure what I had done to earn this, but I wasn’t the one to complain. I instantly felt calmer about the situation, even though I could tell my plan was dumb. But since I didn’t have a better one, I had to get in motion.

Before I sprang into action, something caught my eye and instantly made my day much, much better.

Next to the generator sat a small jerry can of gasoline that we used for powering the machine. I put the lighter in my back pocket for easy retrieval and pounced at the gasoline, grabbing it and opening it, all in one smooth motion. The Vineslasher’s tentacle was already reaching for me, but I somehow managed to duck its reach and ran towards the plant. I swung the open container and the fuel flew at the plant, covering a not insignificant portion of the bush’s main body.

Before I could enact the second part of my plan, one of the vines had managed to grab me around the waist and squeeze me so hard I couldn’t breathe. I blindly hit it with the dull side of the hatchet, causing it to shove me into the ground, before creeping away. I gasped for air and looked towards the retreating monster. Something didn’t seem quite right.

The way the plant moved seemed very off. Its vines twitched and seized, like a frog leg when you run a low electrical current through it. The petrol seemed to be poisonous to the stupid bush.

“Take that, you vile pile of compost!” I yelled at it in triumph. That was probably the worst trash talk ever uttered by the human mouth. I didn’t care though, because I managed to hurt it, and that was the most important part.

Of course, the Vineslasher wasn’t done with me yet. This time, two of the tentacles grabbed and dragged me towards the plant, just like the pheasant from earlier. I panicked and started kicking at the monster’s main body and trying to get out of the vines’ grasp. I wasn’t dealing a whole lot of damage, but in its poisoned state the plant was weakened enough that I wiggled out of it.

However, before I could escape, the monster tensed and shrunk unto itself before it expanded and spat that disgusting yellow substance at me. Immediately, my skin started to tingle and burn, adding more damage to the numerous cuts and bruises I was already sporting.

Words hung in the corner of my eye, making sure I saw them, but not obstructing my vision.

Attention! You have been poisoned.

“Well, that’s freaking great,“ I felt like karma came for me a bit too quickly for my taste.

If I wanted to survive, I had to hurry up and finish this and finish it quickly. It was the preferable outcome of this fight, so I ignored the yellow goo seeping into my clothes and skin and ran towards the raging bush.

I got closer to the Vineslasher, ducking the remaining vines. I threw myself on the ground and rolled towards the plant. I had only one try to get this right.

The smell of gasoline filled my nostrils, as I pulled out the lighter from my jeans pocket and the bug spray from my holster. I struck the lighter and pressed the nozzle at the same time. My hands were shaking, but the flame thrower did what it was supposed to do. The petrol-covered monster caught fire almost immediately.

In the same instant, one of the vine tentacles grabbed me around the waist again, thorns digging into my side, and pulled me up from the ground. Then it threw me several meters away into the dirt, knocking all of the air out of my lungs. I felt my ribs crack.

That saved my life. If I had stayed that close to the fire I would have been burned to the crisp.

The realisation ran through my mind, but I had no time to be horrified, as I had to move further away because the heat from the flame was getting unbearable.

The Vineslasher didn’t die quietly. It shrieked and trashed its tentacles around, trying to put the fire away. It only made everything worse as the fire was spreading on the vines and dealing even more damage every second. It took several minutes until it let out its final scream and collapsed unto itself, the fire burning almost cheerfully.

You defeated a Vineslasher, level 4. 70 exp gained

Loot? Yes/No

I accepted the prompt and sighed in relief. My entire body hurt like nothing I experienced before. My vision was getting increasingly blurrier and pocked with flashes of colour at the edges of my sight.

I somehow managed to drag myself back to the cabin and close the door behind me. However, that’s all that I mustered the strength to do before my legs gave out from under me. My ears were ringing with notification sounds.

The last thing I saw before I lost consciousness was the green hue of the System script burning an image into my eyelids, like a channel logo on an old television set screen that never got turned off.

You have collected enough EXP to earn Level 1. Level up?

Name: Diana Mond

Age: 25

Class: N/A

Level: N/A (125/100 exp)

Strength: 3

Constitution: 4

Intelligence: 5 (+1)

Wisdom: 3

HP: 2/40

Points to distribute: 0