Nox

I was upset with life, since I was a kid it was hard to live and get by, with my mother being ill and father working to make ends meet while I wasn't even a teenager, it made me thankful for them and what they did though despite the hard life I lived. 

I didn't wanna burden father with my greed, be it a toy or a treat like fast food and instead chose to put my head down and work. I did research on things that interested me, space, history, geography, religions, mythology, legends. Through my research I made a theory on the big bang, of course I did I was a stupid kid, still thinking dragons were real. 

The theory was that something caused it, the big bang, of course science usually has an answer and this time it was correct too, just not the modern one. Scholars of medieval Europe were right with their whole "elements of quintessence" but I didn't have proof. I lacked proof but I knew they were right, something within me told me so at the time.

Later on in life at 18, I started to give up on my mana theory when my mother died of cancer, incurable and I wished to help but I couldn't. I was still learning but the loss hurt me. It was unbearable and the tears didn't stop. The funeral wasn't any better and I wished the mana was real.

During the drive home I pondered about the life I lived and the cards I was dealt. I was thankful to my parents for my up bringing and everything they'd taught me, but I wished we could live better, a world where uncle Anton didn't abandon us.

The fog was too thick to see through and the night sky mixed with the rain made only worsened what we could and couldn't see, leading to our accidents. Father, impaled, brother with a broken spine or neck and sister was decapitated. I was sick at the time from the sight and upset that I was the only one to survive but then I saw it. 

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I'm not sure whether it was my imagination, my mind playing tricks on me or what but the events made me pass out. I got therapy for what it did to me and was angry that the last thing I thought of wasn't even my father or sister, brother or mother. The last thing I thought of as I laid on the dirt, caking me with mud and blood alike, was mana.

I furthered my research on the quintessence thing the scientist's of the past did and it eventually led to me discovering how to use mana. I did so, researching ways to bring my family back and thought of it as magic, my fantasies as a kid were true and I could be the main character of this world, this universe. But I was stopped by my thoughts. 

Thoughts that told me I didn't deserve it, that I got it through the deaths of those close to me, that I should use it to help those less fortunate, like myself. 

I started working with the mana and ether to create my own magic, something that would help those less fortunate and I named it the system, bringing me to where I am now. Sat in my basement, skinny as a twig for not eating, smelly, with my clothes dirty. The basement was a simple enough room, the walls brown and no windows. Only the one light, with stairs leading up and my desk and chair where I did my mana research.

The system popped up as purple, my favourite colour and I thought about how to share this with others. It was not needed in my world, I'm in my 20's and everything seemed great with issues like inequality, hunger/starvation and lack of clean water being tackled. I still thought of my family, many times and was upset they couldn't witness what I'd done, what I made. 

I wanted to help those in this planet, universe but then the thought crossed my mind, what about others. I used my own system, the mana, the ether to spread the power to other universes. If gods, people from myths or legends or anyone existed then it help them, and hopefully help the me in their world. That was my hope. This world didn't need it and the system recognized that too. 

The purple screen changed to a blue one and the words on the screen said that it would cost me my life for doing such a thing. My life in exchange for helping all those other people, it was worth it. What's one life when compared to billions right? I'm meaningless.

So I told it I accept and felt a rush of power leaving my body. Becoming weak, my heart rate slowed down and I couldn't think as my head rested on the aged, wooden desk. The system, with one last message, disappeared. 

"I'll spread your name across the universe."

My eyes closed and I wondered if my parents would be proud of what I did. I wondered if it would be worth it. But I didn't regret it, the system would help those elsewhere. Universe 00 was perfect as it is.

If this is dying, then I'm not afraid. I'll embrace it. 

and so my eyes closed..