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The Snake Report
Book III - Chapter 29

Book III - Chapter 29

Chapter 29

[Rocky]

“Are you going to let us see your boss, or not?” The shorter of the two humans asked Rocky.

"Eveth, maybe you should tone it down-"

"Are you, or not?" The shorter human repeated their question.

Rocky felt this would probably be the time to frown, if he knew how. He didn’t, outside of some odd fragments of information now innately provided by his core. For the most part, Rocky didn’t really understand facial expressions very well.

Still, in the case he could understand them, and if his face was willing to allow for it, he probably would have frowned.

“You listening?”

The short human was persistent. Rocky had been very much hoping they would leave.

“We’re here to see the the blue, magical, entity that has taken residence in this vicinity. Do you understand?”

Rocky nodded, reluctantly, to confirm he did understand.

“So, you’ll take us to see him?”

Rocky shook his head to indicate he wasn’t going to.

“Then, we’ll keep waiting. I’m sure he’ll be here soon.”

The shorter of the two humans made that announcement with a loud huff of air (which was something which humans needed, to breathe, apparently) before taking a seat on Rocky’s favorite boulder.

It was the boulder that he and Gorf had been saving, in case they needed something heavy to throw at something else. The act of the human sitting on it bothered him, for reasons he could not find words for.

This was nothing but trouble. What was worse, though, was Rocky had no idea what to do about it.

It was a strange turn of events, but he had found himself at odds with his responsibilities.

The core of his being, the purpose of which his very existence seemed tethered on, was beholden to the notion of protecting this place. Following the Creator’s orders and whims as well, certainly, but as Rocky’s foundation was to protect, and this normally meant that Rocky’s job was simple. Considering the frequency of which they tended to occur: he was very comfortable repelling attacks, throwing wagons, or fighting. In all ways he could, Rocky had taken it upon himself to be quite proficient.

But he wasn’t quite sure what to do with humans that weren’t attacking.

With humans that were just… sitting there. Flapping their odd human, squishy, bodies about, to make noise, without the slightest sign of impending violence. In fact, going to far as to directly say “they meant no harm.”

This had never happened before.

“Waiting out in the middle of the wastes, on the whims of a giant stone frog.” The larger human said. “Althought I’m thankful, that this one only seems to have a single head.”

“You really didn’t have to come.”

“You really expected me to let you come out here alone? With all that’s been happening?”

“Tuth seemed keen on it.”

“Tuth’s not known for his moral compass.”

“And, you specifically forbid Dren from going.”

“That’s because I’d rather not see him die for such a pointless reason.” The larger human huffed. “Coming back here was a monumentally stupid thing to do, Eveth.”

“So you’ve been intent on reminding me.”

“Forgetting the Constructs reportedly sighted nearby, what if our friend isn't happy to see us? Or if the Empire catches us out here?”

“I’ll handle it.”

“You’ll handle it…” The larger human shook their head.

"I will."

“You realize that damn basilisk might as well have turned half the people on the Mercenary’s Guild payroll into ashes. Followed by two noble armies-”

“Reports seem to agree no one from the subjugation armies died. Just that they suffered heavy injuries and financial losses.”

“Your point being?”

“He’s not the type to attack people for sport.”

“Until recently. Tell that the the remains of that caravan the patrols found-”

“We owe him this much, Alem.” They paused for a moment. "Besides, it would be to our benefit if he listened."

“Fine.” The larger human seemed to deflate, leaning back on the boulder.

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Rocky listened, in the way all Golem habitually listen to things. With a sense of processing the words and language, but not with much interest. His core seemed to have assessed the situation well enough, at this point. So, unless the bigger one got up and started swinging that hammer, Rocky felt confident that not much was changing in their behavior.

Which had him stumped.

The lack of hostility these two humans had shown, thus far, was unprecedented.

Plus, they had left their wagon on the road. How was he supposed to flip that into the air, when it was all the way over there? At best, he might be able to throw something- but there they were: sitting on his boulder. And, Rocky wasn’t supposed to go that far without permission.

This was a first for him, in so many ways.

“What if the snake isn’t here?” The larger human spoke up again. "What if he already left?"

“There’s a stack of stolen cargo boxes, a pile of broken wagons, and a giant frog statue guarding a small tree.”

“Is that suppose to mean something?”

“Of course he’s here, Alem.”

“Alright, I just meant that, maybe, he’s out. Hunting, or whatever it is monsters happen to do when they’re not attacking caravans. Slithering in the Dungeon, or something.”

“You don’t have to stay.”

“Come on, now.” The larger human shook their head, with a loud sigh. “I don’t know why you’re so stubborn.”

“In general, or just about this?”

“What do you think?”

The smaller human didn’t respond, this time. Following the angle of their gaze, Rocky noted they seemed to be focused on the sprout.

Shifting, slowly, Rocky brought his shield down to hide it from them.

“I just have a hard time believing it stayed here.”

“He’s still here, Alem.”

“I’m past the point of arguing about it.”

“Then, what are you doing?”

“I just feel as though…there have to be better places in the world."

"Maybe."

"I can only imagine a basilisk would be happy enough to find some other lair. Monsters usually prefer places that don’t attract so much unwanted attention.”

“If you keep thinking about him as just a monster, you’re never going to make sense of anything. If he were that simple, we’d already be dead.”

“I know he's not just a monster, Eveth. You’re not the only one who had to speak with... him.”

“But?”

“But what else am I suppose to call him?”

“That's a very good question.”

The smaller human was staring at Rocky now, instead of the sprout. Which, Rocky had hoped might be preferable, but was actually worse. Unlike most humans he’d seen, who would look at his face, this one was much more interested in Rocky’s torso. Their line of sight uncomfortably settled to the upper center, where his core was located.

It worried him that they could tell.

None of the other humans he'd seen could tell.

“Another hour here and we'll have to leave. They’ve been shutting the city gates at sundown. Too many Constructs have been sighted inland since the last breach along the lines, and we’re risking our necks as it is.”

“If we come back tomorrow, it might be too late.” The shorter one answered.

“There’s being stubborn, Eveth, and there’s being suicidal. We don’t even know if the snake is going to show up.”

“He’ll be here soon.”

“You said that same thing, hours ago.”

Rocky watched them.

Them, and their strange, non-scaly, oddly-squishy, looking faces.

Without any commands to guide him, he was quite stuck. Rocky’s brilliant plan to wait until they attacked him clearly wasn’t cutting it: so, he was going to have to try more drastic measures.

Rocky took a step towards the humans.

“Easy there, big fella.” The larger human got up, wary as Rocky decided another step was in order. Slowly, they abandoned their resting place. “Easy there, we’re not here to fight.”

Judging their reactions, Rocky felt he might have discovered a viable solution to his lingering problems. Perhaps, Gorf wasn’t the only genius, after all.

“Easy there…” The larger human repeated, hands up. “Eveth, I think our time is up.”

As Rocky stopped, directly in front of the boulder they had been sitting on, the impact of his presence seemed to be working quite well. Yet, for some reason, the smaller human hadn’t moved away like their companion had.

Rocky sized them up, spreading his arms wide. His shield of stone lifted in a show of force that sent dust flying. His weapon slammed into the earth with an impact heavy enough to send a shockwave rippling out from where he stood. It was the most fearsome display of power he could manage.

But, the smaller human didn’t move.

Even as Rocky leaned in, until his face rested eye to eye with them, he was unpleasantly surprised to find they didn’t so much as blink.

“Listen here, you big lump.” The smaller human commanded, meeting his stare. “I didn’t come all the way out here to fight, and I certainly didn’t come all the way here to get turned away by a stubborn pile of rubble. I came here to deliver a very important warning.”

Rocky raise his weapon again, but to no effect. The human didn’t seem scared at all.

“It’s critical that your master hears this warning. Do you understand me?”

Slowly, Rocky nodded.

“The Empire is going to come back here, soon. They don't take kindly to people breaking trade between the city and the coast.” The smaller human spoke very clearly and distinctly. “When the Empire comes back over here, it's going to be different. They’re not going to be playing around.”

Rocky shook his head again, as he gestured with his shield towards to the pile of broken wagons.

“I take it that is supposed to mean you’re not worried?” The human asked.

Rocky shrugged, rolling his weapon back against his shoulder, as the human sighed.

“Listen here, you brick-headed idiot. Some noble-born brat who was only expected to walk up to a hole in the ground and plant a flag, is not the same thing as the Empire. And after that stunt with the Caravan the other day, they are going to get serious.” The human stood up, pushing a finger into Rocky’s face as they continued. “So tell your master that his grace period has ended. Play-time is over. It's time for him to leave.”

Rocky eyed the finger, considering whether or not such an action counted as aggression. It wasn’t as though something like this could hurt physically him, but Rocky felt it might be sufficient to give the human a good shove in return. If that broke them, it wasn’t his fault they were so squishy and fragile…

Reaching out a hand to push back, Rocky decided to go for it.

“Wouldn’t do that, if I were you.”

The human suddenly pressed harder, and Rocky realized that he was tumbling backward. Somehow he’d lost his balance, and now his body utterly failing to respond.

He landed hard, with his core racing to identify the problem.

[Status] - [???] [!]

>{Analysis - UNIDENTIFIED]

>[Foreign Element - Detected] [!]

>[Purging] - [IN PROGRESS]

His vision faltered, as the human stepped causally onto his chest, crouching down to stare at him- but not at his face.

At his core.

At him.

>[Purging] - [FAILED]

>[Reassessment] - [PENDING]

>[Foreign Element - Detected] [!] [!]

>[Status] - [Immobilized] - [???] - [!] [!] [!] [!]

“I owe your master more than just a few favors, and collectively we all owed Imra.” They said, setting their finger to his chest. “So, when he gets back, you had better make damn sure you give him this message. Listen very carefully.”

Rocky’s core was spinning in panic, as he stared helplessly. The light pressure of their touch, holding him as sure as surely as a mountain of stone. No matter how he struggled to rise, his body refused to budge.

[Sentient Golem] - [Rank Up]

Rocky fought.

He battled with all his might. His core spun up to dangerous speeds, as his arms trembled, then fell.

[Sentient Golem] - [Rank Up]

His weapon rolled away, useless. His shield felt like a shackle, holding his body to the earth. Yet, for all his struggles, the human simply stared. That one finger pressed like a vice as they looked down on him.

“Tell him that it’s time to move on.” The human said. “Because if he doesn’t leave here soon, the Empire is going to kill him.”