October 2042. The third quarter bonus has been paid out and Patricia invested all of it in short-term commercial papers with 30-day maturities. It didn't amount to that much, only about $200 in interest revenue at 3% interest rates, but better that than nothing. In her mind, every dollar counted.
Fast-forward to November 2042, a few days before they leave for Ukraine. Of course, prior to their departure, Patricia appears on Kansas City-area TV so that both sides of the city (Kansas and Missouri) learn about ChGK, as well as how to qualify for the Worlds. And, of course, tips on how to get started, and, from there, better at the game.
"The Kansas State Team will represent the US at the ChGK Worlds in Bakhmut later this week. Here's an interview with its captain, Patricia Halpern! For most people in this region, ChGK is a complete unknown. Could you please give a high-level overview of what ChGK is?" the journalist asks her.
Obviously, the journalist's questions made it clear that ChGK flew under the radar, even with one of the best players in the country playing right under their noses.
But the Americans wanting to know about the United States' performance at the ChGK Worlds in more detail than what Kansas City media bothered to do are forced to rely on Ukrainian media, and more specifically, its international English-language channel, UATV. And, out of 100 teams competing at the ChGK Worlds, Ukraine has 6 teams to the US' 1.
"I appeared on TV last night! We slaved away for years, play at Worlds and it's only now that we appear on TV! Not even after winning Nats did we get a news release!" Patricia tells her teammates while going through airport security.
"It's not like in Mariupol where, after Azovstal won the LCM, local media ran an article where they described their victory at the LCM as a sweet vengeance for their failures of the rest of the season" Vira explains to them.
"No one expects much of us at Worlds, except maybe for China, North Korea and Syria" Yakiv adds to what to expect.
And maybe Azovstal and Brain Art, too... we beat them at various tournaments, but lost the LCM to them! I am nervous; what we worked so hard towards during the past 2 years all comes down to one Saturday in Bakhmut, Bohdan muses while he gets through security prior to boarding their flight to New York.
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The following day, upon arrival in Donetsk, they waste no time driving down to Mariupol. Already the hotel staff starts asking them questions in Ukrainian about what they are in Mariupol for. A seminar at Mariupol State about Vira and Yakiv's lives as refugees and the sacrifices endured by the US for Ukraine. Which included a skyrocketing military budget that caused the federal government to risk being in default of payment. But there were several steps the US didn't take, fearing that it would lead to disastrous consequences.
Yet, at a bar close to the hotel that night, some guest somehow overheard Patricia talk about North Korea in ChGK.
"You might be wondering how North Korea even was able to play ChGK, let alone at a level that enables them to play at Worlds. You must understand the following: North Korean contractors end up working in Russia, as do students, mostly in business, science and engineering, and then bring ChGK back home" a local patron tells Patricia in a heavy Ukrainian accent.
"I assume the same happens with Syrian students, as well as Iranian ones" Patricia then remarks on how Syria and Iran could have played ChGK.
Syria is currently the fastest riser in ChGK. Even so, China's rise on the international ChGK stage was meteoric. But defeating China at the Last Chance Marathon is not the end of the story. Yet, here in Ukraine, I represent the US, Patricia ruminates while struggling to resist the temptation to drink alcohol.
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The following day, Vira gets the team from the hotel to the campus of Mariupol State which, post-war, was rebuilt in a more traditional Ukrainian architecture. This is nothing like the Mariupol State I attended, which was much more Brutalist, she muses upon entering the gates of the campus.
The auditorium is filled with over a hundred attendees, mostly students in the English and History departments. The host professor introduces Vira to the audience.
After a while of talking about the siege of Mariupol, Vira starts talking about something else: her life as an ELL teacher in Ukraine vs in Kansas.
"I had experience of teaching English as a second language before I left Ukraine, so I could apply for a restricted teaching license in Kansas as soon as I arrived on American soil. Now, Kansas is more like Kherson or Zaporizhzhia oblast countryside than it is like Donbass. Elementary school kids are going to be unruly everywhere and only a handful of them will take their studies seriously. Early on, people sympathized with our plight, but I was utterly unprepared for the sheer level of anti-intellectualism as I got more used to my life in the US" Vira harangues the crowd.
Vira then talks about her sacrifices endured, especially early in her career in the US. And the crowd has a lot of questions about how she deals with anti-intellectualism, and other areas of American life that differs from Ukraine, beyond language alone.
"How does American university experience differ from ours?" an undergraduate asks Vira.
"The American system tends to stress the importance of a well-rounded education even at the university level, leaving less room to learn your major in greater depth. Often people treat college as a time to explore different fields. But at the same time, humanities and social sciences are often treated as a way to get good grades easily at the undergraduate level" Vira explains to the crowd, somewhat puzzled.
In contrast, in Ukraine, people must declare their major on their application. And the most stressful part is the choice of a major. Obviously, some majors carried higher requirements but in humanities, most of the time, all you needed was to graduate in good academic standing from high school. At least as far as Mariupol State is concerned, Vira reflects on how it happens in Ukraine. By now I'm sure Patricia and Sergei both know this, but most high school ChGK players used to be top-25% students in high school, and often top-10%, as with scholars bowl, especially those who went on to play in college. In my corner of Mariupol, we needed to pool together all the schools in the neighborhood just to field one team.
"If you wanted to go for a PhD in the US, what are special steps you need to make?" a second-year MA student in English literature asks Vira.
"My ChGK teammate Patricia would probably be able to talk about this process in greater detail than I could. Beyond, of course, the need for good grades and three letters of recommendation"
The second-year MA student is then directed to Patricia backstage. But the crowd in the auditorium asks Vira for more information regarding ChGK in the US, and Kansas more specifically.
"ChGK? There are somehow people playing it in the US?" a bewildered Philologist asks Vira upon mentioning that Patricia is playing ChGK with her.
"Yes. Actually, this seminar would not have been possible if my team wasn't playing at ChGK Worlds this week" Vira explains to them.
Among the gasps of the crowd, the second-year MA student then starts asking questions about a variety of topics related to PhD admissions in English, but while Patricia was perhaps the best person Vira could have directed that student to, it makes her feel nauseated. But not because she didn't know about the process. Memories of her junior year in undergrad resurface and not very pleasant ones. From before she pulled the trigger on the BA+MHA 4+1.
This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.
Grades aren't the end of the story, but that kid is going to need more than just good grades and 3 strong letters of recommendation, of which his thesis advisor is pretty much secured. I was encouraged to pursue a PhD, and not simply because I was supposedly brilliant, or curious. But while I knew what value humanities research had, not sure I would have wanted to end up as an adjunct professor for the rest of my life, Patricia struggles with flashbacks Vira triggered in her.
"I strongly advise you not to take an unfunded offer. In fact, most reputable departments will reject people they can't fund. Oh and it may sound stupid, but, for PhD admissions in the US, the GRE must be taken and it tests you on both English and math. Don't worry about the verbal part: it's generally a given for English PhD applicants. But sometimes a strong math score will help you secure funding, especially at universities where discipline-independent funding opportunities exist" Patricia lectures the English MA student.
"Anything else you think might be useful?" the MA student asks her.
"While it's a little late to get started for this cycle, crafting a strong personal statement can make a world of difference. In addition, the writing sample is key. In your case, it should be an excerpt from your MA thesis, in which case the preface should state clearly where the excerpt fits in the overall work. It's a lot to think about, on top of contacting potential dissertation advisors to ensure your research interests overlap. And it goes without saying that research fit is going to make a difference. And pay attention to program application requirements, too"
While, of course, humanities departments struggled for decades, some departments closed graduate programs, while others closed altogether. Tulane, for instance, operated a MA program that ended up being a funded program just to ensure the graduate program could even have students at all. The unease proves a bit much for her and she reaches for the nearest bathroom. Just before it intensifies...
"That's a lot to take in, but I assume I would be a teaching assistant" the MA student tells a visibly unwell Patricia.
"Yes, but keep in mind it doesn't pay a whole lot. Not that I advise you against it per se, in fact, there are a lot of people who would advise you against pursuing a doctoral degree, I am just not one of them" Patricia answers with her voice not being normal.
"Let's back up for a bit. What level of math is going to be on the GRE?"
At Tulane, so many came to campus with credit for calculus BC, including myself, that those who didn't tended to come from schools that didn't offer it, or were athletes. But I am not sure to what extent Ukrainian high schools covered math. Vira made it sound like there wasn't any math coverage in Ukrainian college humanities curricula, Patricia's malaise forces her to keep quiet while the student remains outside the bathroom.
And then comes the vomiting. Probably the stress of the upcoming ChGK Worlds getting the better of her, or the unpleasant memories from professors regularly reminding her of what it takes to get into a PhD program. Once the vomiting ends...
"I would say high school level math. Hence the stupidity of the test for the purpose of English PhD admissions. However, if you have friends in other disciplines, they can't take the verbal part of the GRE for granted the way you could, but almost everything else I said could apply to them, too" Patricia then belatedly answers the student's question.
"You gave me a lot to think about, thank you. I'll give that information if my friends ask for it" the MA student tells her.
Speaking of graduate school, I must check on all 3 people I helped! Ainslee, Deepak and Stephanie, she muses before texting Ainslee and Deepak individually. But also that she knew that, while she had a rough idea of where Stephanie stood, the missing piece is their GRE scores for the other two. She never asked for these, but also she knows that she wouldn't get answers from them for a few more hours.
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But once the question period for Vira's seminar ends, the honorarium is paid by check, or rather two checks of equal amounts: one paid by the English department and another by the History department.
"Before we leave Mariupol for Bakhmut, let us go to the bank and cash the checks. And, of course, the monument to the fallen in the siege of Mariupol, which is in some technopark" Vira warns her teammates.
After Mariupol fell under Russian hands, the Russian authorities ordered the demolition of the Azovstal steel plant. Especially since the battle damage sustained by the plant made it virtually irreparable.
Once the checks are cashed in hryvnias, at a bank branch near where Azovstal stood, they arrive at the location Yakiv and his family believed was a must for anyone visiting Mariupol, along with the old water tower and the houses with a spire.
There only remain two monuments on site: one to the Azovstal steel plant workers who lost their lives in WW2, the other being a sculpture of a HIMARS system, fully loaded with 6 rockets as used in Ukraine at the time. I wonder if I should have been a college counselor instead... although it's the first time I ever had that impression. Doesn't make any sense. Sometimes, I envy people who can afford to take a more carefree approach to their intellectual life, like this student I helped navigate through the PhD application process. Or at least the appearance of being able to take a more carefree approach to their intellectual life. However, I just couldn't do so; I graduated with $86k in debt. That, even though I repay my student debts relatively fast. I'm down to $15k by now. I wonder if things would have been different if I didn't incur that kind of debt. Like, if I got a full-ride at Tulane rather than three-quarters as a combination of need and merit aid. That being said, I was lucky and not with my education. Lucky that Tulane feels more like a liberal arts college, and people seemed to not be as careerist as at other Ivy-equivalents. Unlucky in that I felt essentially forced to tack on something more practical to pay back the debt. And that something gave me the job I have now. By and large, I took a more holistic approach to rehab management, Patricia reflects on her dealings with higher education.
"I must say the following: often top students in high school and college tend to be trapped in a rat race I only partially escaped. The pursuit of intellectual passions is often lost on so many; they're really good at what they do but their motives to do so are mostly external. Like, you know, get into a good college, then get a good job or a good professional school. I deviated a bit for the second step" Patricia explains on the road from Mariupol to Bakhmut, as the van left Mariupol's city limits and the sixth player is driving it.
"What do you mean, you deviated only a bit?" Vira asks her.
"I still did what's safe, and I still believed credentials were my salvation back then. I did so, believing that whichever degree I would then pursue would, for a time, define what career path I would take, and I saw in the eliteness of Tulane's MHA a silver lining. I don't necessarily dream of wealth, though"
"I get it, people tended to look at college in terms of job training. You were not a failure by any stretch, however. In fact, you were lucky to still be able to function by the end of high school" Yakiv comments on Patricia's past.
"Never did I say that I was a failure. Many hoop-jumpers, as one tie-breaking question at the LCM put it, suffer from much more crippling anxiety and depression than I ever did. I might have cried from time to time, but mental health issues spare no one. I saw my own classmates in high school as well as in college suffer, but, at the same time, being a therapist or a social worker wasn't for me. Yet, I saw so many at Tulane get drugs or alcohol, and not just because of partying, but also to cope with the academic pressures. It was even worse than in high school, I saw the warning signs coming even then. Now you have a better idea of what made me work as a psychiatric hospital administrator" Patricia then tells her own dealings with addiction.
To be fair, Tulane draws so many high achievers, many of whom are overachievers of an even more extreme kind than I was. And reading the Venomous Agenda Memoirs, written by a retired Louisiana superintendent, made me realize there was a high human cost in the pursuit of success, academic and professional, Patricia muses, while reading the Venomous Agenda Memoirs right next to Vira.
Vira was most interested in the measures taken by the VAs' school and, subsequently the Jefferson Davis parish, in rural southwest Louisiana, took to limit the damage to students. They were limited to 4 AP courses per year and 2 extracurriculars. Initially understood to mean 2 varsity teams, sports or academic, band and theater were quickly understood to be the same as varsity teams to the eyes of the teachers.
What Vira does not realize is that one of Patricia's quiz bowl teammates on the Green Wave was mentioned in the Memoirs by name. Imélie. And Imélie was somehow one of the least achievement-obsessed of these star students whose high school days he extensively commented upon. And the first of these students who even made the Venomous Agendas a mathletic household name, at least in the Deep South, Geneviève Lasedri, was, simply put, maniacal about mathletic achievement.
And only a handful of students the parish cherished back then were able to escape the overachievement trap. The most remarkable of these students, to his eyes, was Florence. Even though, in the author's words, Florence was an overshadowed high achiever, she was seemingly content to spend 4 years at Laval University and then return home to teach French. Less is more in student form.
When their van nearly runs out of power, they make a stop in Niu-York to recharge their van, as well as eat.
"To me, the measures described in the Venomous Agenda Memoirs feel like half-measures motivated not so much by a desire to relieve stress but as a response to budgetary constraints" Vira comments on what she managed to read of the VA Memoirs.
"How so?" Sergei asks his mother.
"AP courses usually cost more on a per-student basis to teach vs non-AP courses on the same subject. Four AP courses are very stressful. Three would be a more appropriate limit" Vira explains to him.