“No, I say it with due weight,” I corrected Thanos, and his abyssal-black orbs flashed in reaction. “You are Her Champion, so naturally such status is below you. A Courtier of Death is someone who has engaged in great slaughter, or has killed something that should not have died and denied Death Her due in doing so. Both feats may draw the attention of Death, and as She may make use of their talents in the future, She brings them into Her Court.

“In practical terms, it means they have received the acknowledgement of Death, and beings of Cosmic or Divine significance can see it upon them if they look for it. There’s some minor insights on how best to kill things which are already subject to Death. I don’t presume to understand Her purpose behind it all, and really, it gives too much information away. If you’re trying to slaughter an Elder God, letting it know you’re a Courtier of Death and have killed the unkillable in the past is tactically unwise.”

His gleaming dark orbs flickered at the thought, and then deepened further. “You have the touch of Mistress Death upon you...” he suddenly realized.

Between one step and the next, I returned to my full Golden Child form. I had thirteen Levels in it now, meaning I was actually ahead of Kismet and she contributed nothing for me now. I also grew to six foot six inches, and I could look Thanos straight in the eye.

He paused despite himself. My hair was still auburn and my eyes were glowing emerald, not white, but there was no mistaking the resemblance to Adam Warlock, whose party of intrepid adventurers had been annoying him for years now.

And also Adam Warlock’s gray-skinned alternate counterpart.

“I hear you have been enquiring about me?” I asked Thanos archly.

He was a silent for a moment. “You destroyed the Church of the Universal Truth,” he finally rumbled, able to recognize that at the very least.

“I did. And I watch its remnants even now, as do you. That copious bad luck it’s been having is not an accident.”

“Hrn.” He clasped his hands behind his back. “And you dealt with the Magus.”

I reached back behind my back and under my hair, pulled down Function, and its Glaive form extended out with a snap and flow of Compressed metal. Thanos’ unmoving face fixed on the Skull gaping at the base of the burning Blade, vomiting out endless gray Banefire. “I did. And for that, She made me a Courtier of Death.”

The pale gray Baneflames caressed the back of his eyes with promises of annihilation, made to deal with things that thought themselves beyond Death.

“A reward for dealing with the Champion of Life?” he conjectured, managing to keep his gravelly voice level.

“The Magos was not a Champion of Life. Life has no Champion to oppose Death. There is Death, and Eternity, there is no Life. The Magos was a Champion of Order and Chaos, even if not by his own will. If those two were working opposite Death or whatever for Their purposes, so be it. But Life has no Champion, for there is no Life to make it so.”

His mouth opened, and closed slowly. “Without life, there is no Death...” he murmured.

“And thus it is Death Herself who is the greatest Champion of life. Why would She need something to oppose Herself?” I asked rhetorically. “How Order and Chaos interpret Her desires and their duties is another matter, but that Magus was not of this alternity, regardless, and his counterpart will not be born here.

“If you consider Adam Warlock a Champion of Life, then the only difference between the two of you is your methodology and level of awareness of Death and Eternity’s desires, and the balance of cosmic forces within them.”

Which meant they might be rivals, but they were NOT natural enemies. They were meant to be allies!

“And do we command the Courtiers of Death?” he asked reasonably.

“We are the Courtiers of Death, not the Courtiers of Death’s Champion,” I replied easily, and he grunted at the point. “I doubt Death appoints a Champion who does not want the job, but Courtiers, ah, I believe She thinks we are like white blood cells, an immune system for the universe, fighting off invaders across the firmament, dealing with problems, and those who would like to make trouble can look in and see they are there, ready and waiting to eat them.

“Her Champion is more like a personally-trained surgeon, I would guess.”

His dark eyes flickered again, considering that point. “And the Champion of life?” he asked, intrigued.

“An herbalist or apothecary?” I conjectured.

The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.

His depthless eyes widened slightly at the comparison. “One helping the universe heal from an infection by cutting it out, while the other helps the universe heal itself and fight it away on its own...

“I have sacrificed billions to Death,” he informed me, watching my reaction closely.

“I am fully aware of the three hundred and twelve billion sapients across nine galaxies whose deaths are to be laid at your feet, to say nothing of the ecosystems and worlds razed clean, Master Thanos,” I confirmed for him coolly.

“You believe that was... an error.” His eyes glowed blackly, perhaps anticipating an attack. After all, I had not put Function away.

“I believe all that which died would have been Death’s without your reaping, and furthermore you cost Her all the deaths of all that would have descended from them.

“If you believe Death’s ambition is to hurry the death of the universe, then naturally your actions were correct, from a very limited point of view. After all, mass slaughter using conventional means is horrendously inefficient. Tearing apart the structure of Eternity is not that hard to beings of sufficient insight and power... but naturally that would destroy Death as well, and start the universe over in a new cycle.

“Is your desire to make of Eternity a temporary necropolis, before His Will collapses, that Death may reign for a brief moment before She Ends? She always wins in the End, and time means nothing to Her, so I am unsure of your motivation to ‘speed things up’, as it were. Death has always been described as most patient...”

His heavy brow furrowed slightly. “We have a different perspective on Death, although you have made me consider things in a different light. I had pictured Her in an endless struggle with Eternity, and I sought to win Her favor by turning that struggle to Her advantage...”

“Without falling to Oblivion?” I asked archly.

He paused. “That...” he trailed off.

“I know personally of at least four attempted universe-destroying efforts that have happened in the last five Terran years. Five, if you consider Grandmaster’s usurpation of Death’s realm and temporarily killing off eighty percent of the universe.” I paused as I saw a tremor pass his face. “Which should be proof enough that the gifting you have been attempting to give Her is an error, as would it be Her Will, one hundred percent of reaping the universe is no different from eighty percent.

“Instead, She restored all the dead. Why would She do that, if the death of all was Her goal? She could win the Game at any instant She bothered to, because She has the power to do so. She doesn’t need anyone or anything to kill for Her.”

He came to a dead stop, a shocked expression in his dark eyes at the comprehension. “She... takes a Champion not because She cannot act in the world of the living, but because She restrains Herself from doing so...” he almost gasped.

“The Game is Hers to End whenever She wishes. That became perfectly obvious after that bit of shenanigans from the Elders. Since She obviously does not wish to End it, then on such a stage, it is only logical that She wishes the Game to last as long and magnificently as possible, and to be the Death with the greatest Harvests ever.” I looked around at the settlement of the Eternals of Titan. “With your perspective of years and the many potential eons ahead of you, I believe you can appreciate that fairly easily.

“Of course, I could be completely wrong. I do not know the mind of Death, I can only infer from Her actions.”

We walked in utter silence for a couple minutes, as he ruminated over the revelations which had to be challenging the very foundations of his philosophy. At last, he murmured, “You make the job of Death’s Champion sound almost heroic...” His disgust at the term was plain.

“Well, it translates as ‘champion’, not as ‘reaper’, ‘reaver’, or ‘butcher’,” I offered in reply, and his frown only deepened. “I imagine one of Her criteria is absolute mercilessness when it is time to act, perhaps even enthusiasm for the task.”

He rumbled once. “Not a mindset you enjoy?” he questioned, sounded vaguely amused.

“I am willing to kill. I do not like having to kill. It always seems too simplistic...”

“So your actions are not undertaken with any consideration of Death’s view...”

“I am a Courtier by Her wishes, not mine. Awareness of the status does not make me Her advocate.

“However, I am not stupid, and I am very good at the required duty, which oddly enough will probably benefit me regardless by keeping the universe around a bit longer, and those I do wish to defend alive and relatively free.”

“Such as disposing of the Magus.”

“I see you are aware of how devastating his remaining alive would have been.”

“And his Church.” His eyes glowed with his own dark beliefs. “Are you behind the difficulties the Badoon are having?” he inquired in a completely neutral tone.

“I am one of those responsible for some of their difficulties, yes,” I confirmed.

“Watching their empire hemorrhage has been... instructive.” His voice indicated appreciation for what was happening. “Why have you not moved against my own forces?” he asked directly.

“The Badoon are your forces,” I pointed out, and he inclined his chin slightly at the point. “And who says we haven’t been taking actions against your people? I’m sure you have noticed that the numbers of your Disciples have been falling.”

That actually drew a slight smile from him, grim as it was. “So they have. The annihilation of Nebula’s force was interesting. Such ruthlessness was very unexpected of Xandar.”

“As a descendant of Terra, you should be very familiar with how ruthless Terrans can be, such a fine example as you are.”

“Indeed. Indulge me. What is your opinion of the Badoon... and the Kree, and the Skrulls, from the perspective of Death?”

“The Badoon and the Skrull do not generate new life. They replace what is already there, and their ecosystem rewriting and substitution rapidly destroys evolution and reduces the vitality and vigor of life.

“It is now too bothersome for them to create new worlds and add to the net of life. They simply look for worlds that are alive and take them for their own instead, replacing what was there before them.

“The Kree do something similar, but their abhorrence for vegetation means they cover living and unliving worlds alike in machinery, and so even when they bring life to a dead world, it is inherently limited. After all, on Hala, their ideal, nothing grows, save power...”