“ZEUS!”
The word was not a compliment nor was there any shred of respect in it. The way the new doors to his temple blew off and went cascading down the atrium, scattering eager supplicants happy to make requests of the high god of Olympus, kind of punctuated the whole thing.
If you were looking at his benignly smug face, you might have seen an instant of ‘oh, shit’ come over it. However, he surged to his feet, lightning exploding forth around him in an aura of power.
“WHO DARES-,” he began.
“YOU HAVE A THREE COUNT TO GET THE FUCK BACK TO OLYMPUS, OR YOU CAN LEAVE PART OF YOURSELF BEHIND FOREVER!” were the snarling words that cut right through his own, as a golden-skinned woman skated in that door, eyes of heavens-blue fixed on him... and her Sword was drawn.
DING. “ONE!”
Her Sword rose. Zeus choked, but rallied gamely as thunder exploded in the temple, leaping forth at the woman who dared to threaten him. “WHAT HUBRIS! LITTLE MORTAL...” he swore.
TING! “TWO!” His mighty lightning faded into nothing within twenty feet of her, and he swallowed as he wavered.
CHING!
He panicked, and made for a thunderbolt exit right through the roof of his own temple.
But it was too late. “THREE! LEAVE AN ARM!”
The thunder was loud, but his scream was clearly audible over the entire city as the bright lightning failed and sputtered, and the whole back of the temple and his throne gained a gleaming seam out of nowhere.
The over-sized arm that fell to the ground was bleeding copiously, said blood already burning vivic.
“Everyone get the fuck out of here! And if Zeus actually grants any of your goddamn petitions, I’m going to first hunt down and kill every one of you, and then I’m going to go up to Olympus and take his damned head!
“GET!”
The new temple to Olympus in general and Zeus properly, wrought by Olympian magic, emptied with desperate speed. Sama Rantha stepped up, picked up the fallen arm of a god burning there, and sneered at the immortal flesh.
“You’re going to want to leave, too, unless you plan on staying forever, Queen Hera!”
The taller-than-human woman stepped out of the shadows at the rear of the temple. There was no anger in her eyes, only a rough satisfaction as she saw that arm in Sama’s golden-clawed hand, burning away. “Shall I return my husband his arm, oh Golden Hag?” she asked neutrally, but if there was smugness in her words, Sama didn’t care.
“No. He’s going to lose it forever. Get out of here. I know the shit you’ve been pulling on Hercules over the years, and never has he done anything to you to deserve it. I have no sympathy for you or your position. If you are here when I reduce this temple, you’re going to be bloodspray between the stones.”
Sama lifted Tremble, and the air quavered. Queen Hera’s face faltered as she retreated a step. “The gods may well not appreciate this lesson, Sama Rantha,” she warned the swordswoman, bowing slightly.
The laugh that came forth made all her hair stand on end, a Hag’s Cackle that conveyed scorn and contempt far beyond what a mortal voice should be able to hold. “If they would prefer I visit your pretty little mountain home and reduce it and them to finger-size chunks of food for the Land, I will do so instead! I am an expert in administering lessons in mortality, and they seem like they are in need of an education!”
Queen Hera flushed, and retreated into the shadows, gone in the next second.
Sama looked around the ostentatious building of gold and marble, ivory and silver. A step of her foot made sure there was nothing else living inside this place, and she sliced out once.
Well, it looked like once. You would have had to have had very, very good eyes to see how many times it actually cut, and where it did so.
With a hiss, the structure of the temple came apart, reduced basically to grains of sand. Vivic energy bubbled up over the magically-created structure, and began to reduce it down even further as it poured down to the floor, not even daring to generate clouds of dust as it did so, settling into heavy mounds of featureless, misting stone being devoured by vivus.
“Total fucktard,” she muttered, taking the arm with her as Tremble flicked up an opening through space. She stepped through, and was gone.
The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
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I noted that even with the departure of the Celestials, after the example was made of Zeus, none of the other pantheons made moves to re-establish their worship among mortals. It turned out the whoremongering Skyfather of the Olympians was good for something after all.
It left Hercules with the only active Church of a pantheonic god operating openly on the planet. The difference was that said Church did not operate all that much for Hercules’ benefit, although it could if its adherents chose to give him Strength when it was needed. It existed to help them give Strength to one another!
And yet Thor was running around. Unlike Hercules, he was a true god, with divine parents on both sides. He was also a God of Storms, which was... a little problematic for the self-help department. You didn’t need rain in day to day life all the time, after all...
There were already people of Scandinavian ancestry trying to set up worship of Thor, and hoping he would intervene on their behalf in mortal affairs. Given how badly that could end up, I figured it was time to nip some of the stupidity in the bud, and go talk to him.
He might not take Sama’s heavy hand or the Great Bear’s domineering one too well, especially since the latter had already made the Slavic Pantheon his servants.
Well, we’d just have to see how things went.
===============
A few weeks later...
“I’m surprised you asked for an appointment on the weekend here, Dyna,” Dr. Donald Blake said, regarding me over a steak at the Roccana Club, a very exclusive place that catered only to the amazingly wealthy. I’d borrowed Dr. Richards’ name for the reservations.
“I am aware of your other identity, Doctor, and I wasn’t going to impose on your patients’ time,” I replied, deftly slicing the wagyu and enjoying it. I didn’t eat much, but when I did, I liked it to be good food. QL 25 was pretty good for mortal standards, and if I could do better by myself, I wasn’t the one making this.
His eyes flickered. “To be expected, perhaps. So, this is about the other kind of work?” His smile was a bit forced, his eyes intense.
“No. It’s about the third kind, the one that’s probably gnawing at you at what to do about it.” I reached down, pulled out the Analects of Strength, and slid it across to him. “Have you read Hercules’ religious text?”
He reached out and picked it up thoughtfully. It was a fine copy, said copies of which could only be made by the Church itself, and were one of its bigger sources of revenue. “Not... since I became aware of who I truly am,” he replied slowly, buttering his potatoes lightly.
“You are aware of what just happened to Zeus.”
He nodded slowly as he downed a sprig of broccoli. “That would have been very hard to ignore. You are... familiar with Divine Awareness?”
“It’s not omniscience, but awareness of things that impact the portfolio that a god has influence over. Another god of storms and lightning suffering such a blow would naturally fall within the awareness of Thor.”
He gave me another measuring glance. “You are uncommonly informed about such matters.”
“Faith is a subject of powerful importance to me, and its relationship to magic and other empowering forces.” I s&p’d my own potatoes lightly, grinding the fresh peppercorns with approval. The purple bamboo salt, eh, it had style, I guess.
“And what are your thoughts on such a matter?” he inquired.
“Thor’s mortal worshippers are inevitably going to try to drag him into mortal affairs. They will barter faith for protection, and attempt to use him as a proactive shield as they start pressing for recognition, redress of old wrongs, and other mortal matters. If they were doing so against the will of other gods, fine, that is a matter between faiths and gods. But when you start setting gods against the wills of mortals... that becomes a very dangerous game to play.”
“The Hag and the Bear are perfectly willing to and capable of taking on divine forces.” His eyes flickered thoughtfully, and there was silence as we ate together after his words, recognizing the fact. “At the same time, Thor does not abandon those who have faith in him. Neither of them has moved against him, or even given him so much as a warning or friendly advice,” he noted.
“It is a test of wisdom. Being heroic does not mean being wise. Sama spent decades breaking Hercules out of his stupidity, and building him into the god he is now... but he is a demi-god, and thus part mortal, and so adaptable. Neither of them know if Thor is capable of the insight and patience to do this correctly. His legendary reputation does not encourage them... but they are willing to wait and see.”
“That is a very strange viewpoint, being judged by those born as mortals,” Dr. Blake pointed out.
“It is a question of power; no more, no less. Age, wisdom, experience, guile, intelligence... in the end, it is always power. And they have the power, along with all of the rest.”
“So they do,” he had to agree. Chopping in two a Celestial who could ignore the attacks of multiple skyfathers, and then bluntly chastising a skyfather who had overstepped his bounds. “Are you here on their behalf?” he asked sharply.
“No.” His expression softened somewhat. “I’m here on the faith side of the equation. I’ve experience working with beneficial religions, and would simply like to offer my services in setting up an official Church for Thor that would both convey his views and not conflict with human-empowerment.
“I also know a highly suitable individual who could serve as your High Priestess, giving Thor’s Church instant leadership and credibility without requiring that he actually muddle about in such affairs. I’m talking about a functional Archpriestess, a truly powerful individual, not merely an administrator and mouthpiece. Indeed, if the Pantheon wished to very, very carefully expand its interests and benefits as a whole, she could easily serve most of them.”
He gave me an intense gaze. “That... is a very interesting offer.”
“I thought it might be.”
“Tony and Hank both speak about how smart you are, although you play it close to your chest. But nobody Richards calls his primary lab aide and equation-checker is going to be dumb.” He had a couple more forkfuls, considering things. “You’ve already had some preliminary thoughts on this.”
“I do.” I pulled out another book, rougher in appearance, clearly unfinished. “However, I am not Thor, nor have I spoken in depth with him about his feelings, beliefs, goals, life mission, attitudes, and viewpoints on matters divine and mortal. I can only estimate and provide a framework which needs to be filled in, while taking into account opposing views of gods and mortals.”