March 22, xxxx
Arthur wakes up at 7:40am in his bed. It is the beginning of a day in his life. And it is not a quiet one, as his wake-up time should be at 7o’clock. However, the boy has the bad habit of being late, allowing chaos to reign in the first part of almost every morning.
After hastily changing clothes, he heads for the kitchen. His parents are not there because they have both already left for work. He prepares a snack and coffee. Even if he is late, he refuses to start the day without eating breakfast, even if the schedule allows him only to eat a piece of bread.
He drinks and chew quickly, going out of the house with the bike in one hand and a backpack in his back. It is time to work.
The rout to the office is monotonous and he is used to a slow ride. Again, the thought about the time crosses the mind, however, the proximity to the building where he works makes his desire to be on time gradually decrease.
And it is during this tour that he admires the streets, the buildings, the cars and the people. Sometimes his gaze is fixed on the figure of an attractive person and he gets lost on thoughts about situations where he would run into that person and they would smile, go out to eat and talk about their lives.
He simulates, in his mind, whole relationships, every day, on that same path. He always has dreams of a different life. But, despite being attracted to a life he does not have, he is unable to act on it. After all, acting differently could take from him the things that he already has. It could mean the end of a life of comfort. And, although comfort may be the only reason to remain the same, it is enough to fuel the inertia.
He thinks about hypothetical situations and reasons to his own inactivity when he arrives at a commercial building near the center of the city. After leaving the bike nearby, he packs the bag on his back and heads to the elevators.
He wonders what could exist on the other floors of the building. After pressing the button to the seventh floor, he imagines what might exist in the other twenty-one floors. Was there an exciting and mysterious place there? Maybe a place with secrets unknown to the entire building? Or, at least, a place that was not entirely boring?
The elevator goes to the upper floors and opens the doors a few times before reaching the seventh. Arthur could not say who were the people who traveled with him in that short amount of time, nor did he say goodbye to those who stayed in the elevator. With his head down, he turned left, towards a set of rooms decorated with sober furniture and walls painted in shades of grey.
It is in this set of rooms that he works. If someone asked him what was his profession, he would find it difficult to answer. Since the days of internship, he spent his days sending e-mails, making minor adjustments to contracts and seeking legal solutions for large financial companies. His tasks seemed so generic that he would not be able to define his work.
What he knew was that the office in which he worked was old and the owners had a lot of money. That information is useless to him, since he sees no use in putting his effort into a company where the bosses were the sons or nephews of the founders. For him, an effort to stay in the second echelon was the same as wasting his own time and, despite being able to understand the motivation for others, for him it seems obvious that the cons outweighed the pros.
Still, he was good enough at his job to secure his place there. Even though he did not work overtime and was unmotivated for the majority of his work shift, his competence and ability to adapt to often-tense situations was undeniable. Furthermore, because he was a long-time employee and had no ambitions, this made him the perfect pawn, for whom the worst jobs, that could not be assigned to newbies, were given.
Usually, Arthur left the place at the early evening and went home. He never stayed a minute after his shift, leaving as soon as possible so his day could really start.
The travel back home in his bicycle was one of Arthur’s most cherished moments. The pedaling seemed lighter and the ride seemed smoother. His mind was no longer heavy and he traveled freely through his thoughts, worries about the future or any subject that had caught his attention during the day. It was at that moment that he planned how he would spend the night.
Not that his nights were too varied. Basically, he divided the night into two parts: Dinner with his parents, which were sometimes done at the table so that they could talk calmly, or in the living room, so that they could watch a movie together.
The second part of the evening was all about entertainment: A movie, book, series or video game was what would occupy that period of time. There was always something he wanted to do, whether it was to watch random videos on the internet or spend hours searching for a novel only to stop reading it after five pages, so he could search for another one, just because of the possibility of finding something new and exciting.
Those were his nights. Dinners sometimes had more members at the table when a relative or one of his brothers (who, at this point, were all married) came to visit. And reading, or videogame nights were sometimes replaced by going out with friends to eat or drink. None of these friends were very close to him, but they were enough company to allow him to feel comfortable at a restaurant or in a bar.
After that, his night would end and, before closing his eyes, Arthur was already tired and dissatisfied with the prospect of the next day.
*
April 22, xxxx
Arthur wakes up at 7am, in his bed. Today, for the first time in a while, he is not late.
He gets dressed and has breakfast with his parents. There is an empty look in his face. He goes to work on his bicycle and do his tasks with the same look. Sometimes he answers to someone and even reacts to conversations, but always with few words and without encouraging prolonged contact.
The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.
In his mind, the dissatisfaction with this daily routine has reached the breaking point. It was insufferable. He couldn’t admit that. Some people seemed satisfied to arrive at work at the same time every day. They even seemed to enjoy some of the tasks. The routine and mechanical method of working seemed to be perfect elements for many of his co-workers.
But, for him, that was the same as a slow death.
He didn’t feel like he was living. That monotonous routine felt like purgatory or even a piece of hell. Each day seemed to pass more and more slowly and a fragment of his soul shattered every time he woke up and had to face another day.
Even tasks that would usually animate him seems to become little black holes, sucking his will to live. Hours playing videogames and minutes watching an animation also seem to torment his mind and make his chest tighten, as if he is about to faint from distress.
When did things turn into this? Why does every act feel like a sacrifice and not a choice?
This was the reason for so much effort? Years of studies and academic training, sleepless nights to prepare for exams, days when he deprived himself of entertainment and so many things he didn’t do, all to be in that position? Hating his own day so much that even waking up has become a sacrifice?
What kind of life is that? What kind of sensation is the one he feels in his body? The weakness that invades all limbs and seems to cloud the brain? How long has he not been thinking and acting like he was able to do when he was not absolutely unhappy? What would he been able to do if he had acted according to what he wanted, instead of acting according to what he thought it would be most efficient?
He rejects the idea that “this is life”. That everyone must feel the same things and still say that they are “happy”. After all, he knew from experience that his body was capable of feeling better.
He was not always unhappy and discouraged. In the past, he felt like doing things. He wanted to wake up and study, to talk to people and to look for ways to improve things around him. If his past version heard that his days in the future would be all about working, getting home, eating and sitting in his bedroom chair in front of the TV, he would not believe it. And he would not do that without reason, but because he knew that such a life was not the one that he would have wanted.
However, that was the truth. If only he were satisfied with his situation, he might not do anything about it. After all, there are people who are happy with similar lives and would desire to have that forever.
So, what should he do? After all, the comfort of his routine is guaranteed the way it is. So, what should he do? Give up and admit that it is better to leave everything as it is? Make a mistake by telling himself that he is asking for something he cannot achieve? That he should cherish the convenience of a life he didn’t like instead of looking for something more?
Or should he do the opposite?
What would happen if he did exactly what he himself did not expect?
*
July 22, xxxx
Noon
Arthur uses his lunch hour to be alone in a cafeteria, with a donut in front of him.
His gaze is fixed on a screen with the bills, days and a planned schedule. He needs more time before he can start his venture. After all, to be able to accomplish what he had in mind, he would need money and precautions.
He feels a taste that is not from the coffee or the donut coming to his mouth. What is this feeling inside him? Should not he be afraid of the unknown?
He himself doubted that he would carry this plan forward for so long. After all, it started as just another fantasy in his mind. Another hypothetical scenario, which would never materialize in the world.
Now, however, he finds himself in the real world, so involved with the events around him that he would not be able to dream again, even if he tried.
The screen in front of him displays details of a plan that started months ago. Something he fantasized about as a dream, but it created a question. What if he did what was in his mind? What if he acted the way he acted in the dream? Would there be a chance to be happy?
It was not an easy plan, least of all for him, who needs to remember every day the reasons that led him to such a drastic measure. At all times he has to fight the urge to return to inanity, to a peaceful and ordinary life. And, although it is not easy, it is still something he can do. At first, he needed only enough will to take the initiative.
Now, all he needs is time. That is all. A little more time, before the end of life as he knows it.
*
October 21, xxxx
11pm
Arthur is sitting on his bed, with a big smile and excited by the next day.
His eyes have a unique glow. It is the glow of those who yearn to live. A glow that was not as intense since the time he was a student.
Inside him, a mixture of excitement and fear forms a delicious mess.
His plan is simple: The next day, after waking up, he would quit his job. He would say goodbye to his colleagues and remove the things from his desk. He would return home and announce to his parents that he actually resigned (they didn’t believe when he told them his plans a few weeks ago).
Then, he would organize his bags in the room and check the plane tickets to be sure about the schedule and place of departure. It was time to take a trip.
Then, he would finally be free. After living so long in a terrible gloom, he could go into the light. Who knows? Now, he might not be so unhappy all the time and would finally feel like waking up every day.
Arthur bites his lip, smiling alone in his room. If someone had watched him in that same room in the past few years, it would know how such a moment was rare. Usually he would be looking empty and dispirited, regretting the end of the day and the proximity to the next morning.
This time, however, there is no regret or emptiness. In his eyes there is pure expectation. He knows that, in the state he is in, he will not even be able to sleep properly.
For a moment, he considers not sleeping and staying awake until the sun comes up. The only thing that prevents him is the fear of not being able to enjoy the events to come in a proper way because he has deprived himself of sleep for one night.
This detail is the only reason for him to lie down. It is the reason for him to calm his breath and to close his eyes.
Tomorrow, everything will change. And he can start living again.
*
Unknown day. Unknown month. Unknown year.
Before opening his eyes, Arthur feels something in his stomach. It is speed, like the one you can feel when going down in a fast elevator. It is the same feeling, but stronger.
The wind and noise of the rain confuses the boy’s mind. “What is going on?” he thinks, feeling his body fall into an unknown abyss.
He would not be able to continue his plan. He would not be able to see what happened to his old life. He would not be able to find out if the reason for his unhappiness was his unwillingness to act in his past life.
However, he would discover many other things. After falling, he would discover a whole world of things unknown to him. A world of prophecies, monsters and magic. From that moment on, he would find himself in a place far beyond any hypothetical situation that his mind would be able to create.
That would be the day he started his life’s journey.
A journey into Another World
***