Chapter 34 - The Overthinking

After returning from the bathroom, I closed the private browsing and checked the time, I found out that there was still some left before I planned to go back. Briefly, I thought about just going back at that very moment, but my curiosity had gotten the better of me.

I sat down in front of my PC and began to think. The things that I have lived through up to that point made me wonder how deep the game really was, it was as if it was real,  it seemed much deeper that the advertised five senses. I looked up the details and, indeed, there were some mentions on the forums, mainly made by non-human players, who began to realize...differences while they were in game.

I searched the statistics, looking for some based on the voluntary surveys. They probably wasn’t going to be very accurate, but they would at least give out some insight into things. I soon managed to find the data and started rifling through it.

The statistics shown that almost ninety percent chose or re-rolled a human avatar. With slight embarrassment I noticed that the cross gender re-rolls were extremely popular, and that the amount of people who chose to stay in avatar of an opposite gender was really low.

Even considering that it was a voluntary survey, which was bound to be unreliable, the number of participants was significant and the results too one sided. It made me wonder how technology behind the capsule came to be, one which could replicate reality with such a precision that people could get uncomfortable due to how alien different body felt. -’ Though most of the minute details appeared after some time… ‘

-’ How did they do it? ‘ Spurred by a sudden thought I brought up the technical brochures and tech forums on the screens.

I began by checking data on the lobby, which seemed like a good place to start. -’ Lobby, seems like a transfer domain, where the five senses are replayed, but there’s no time dilation and body details do not seem to be implemented fully... ‘

-” This would be like a classical perfect VR. “ I pondered the fact, especially when I remembered an old article, which claimed that perfect VR would probably require to slow down the speed at which the time passed in game, to allow hardware to keep up with all the data.

I leaned back, doing one of the shifts in reasoning that I was proud of. -” So how come not only they took it a step further, but also set the passage of time at three times the speed… “

The answer to that question was plastered all over the forums, pictures included. A simple box of dark glass, which under any kind of scrutiny turned into unresponsive and useless slab of crystal.

Reflexively, I clicked on the vidlink, which was tagged as one containing an official response of Gust Corp’s CEO to the questions about the box.

The video opened, showing me a seemingly young, twenty something, gentleman in a cream colored suit, with a slicked back, short blonde hair and a slim, rose tinted glasses. His lips seemed to be perpetually bent in a small, impish smile. When one considered his extremely good looks, it made him look like a chosen actor during Hollywood gala that willfully decided to portray a spirit of a Cheshire cat, but without smiling outright. The man was on a podium, addressing questions of several journalists during a press conference.

Despite it being a video I had to admit that the man had a sort of irresistible charm to him. Briefly, I thought about pressing the forward button, but I hesitated, my curiosity piqued by the questions issued by the press.

-” Could you tell us why you claim to use a retinal scanner as an account security measure while it has been proven the it’s not used in that regard? The tests show that the users can't use other peoples machines at all, and it has nothing to do with the retinal scan. “ The question was asked by an unassuming guy of Japanese origin.

-” There seem to be a misconception. " CEO’s smile turned cold, almost cynical. -" Retinal scanner is merely used to protect users data stored on the capsule’s system, the account security is based on much more fail safe mechanism… also the capsule is supposed to be used by only one person, as stated in the ownership contract. “

The statement caused a bit of a stir, but I really didn’t care about that, so I skimmed to the later part, which shown a big and bulky guy in a suit. -” ...then what is used to safeguard the account? “

-” The soul...Khem " CEO responded instantly, though he suddenly made a small cough as if to cover something. -" I meant to say that the user's, as you would call it, psyche is used as a mechanism to identify particular people thereby using someone’s account is impossible. “

-” Does this mean that you are a believer? “ The question was asked by some Arabic guy wearing a thawb.  -” And what religion do you believe in? “

-” Yes, I am very much a believer. “ The CEO gave of a smug smile and a small nod. -” Though I believe that we have gone off topic. Let's answer some more questions, that’s what we all came for after all. Maybe the lady in the back this time around. “ The CEO said goodnaturedly, while waving his hand. -” The one blocked out by the brute of a gentleman in a black. “

The camera shifted, showing an image of a flustered woman in a business attire, next to her there was indeed a really big guy in a black suit, who looked rather embarrassed at that point, it was the same one that just asked the question a bit earlier.

-” Ah, y-yes. Amy Houghton from TechNV. “ She stuttered in surprise, but collected herself instantly. -” Our followers would like to know how did you manage to recreate reality with such precision, or more precisely, what is the black box inside the capsule and how does it work? “

The question instigated quite a large upheaval among the press, who all wanted to add their small tidbits to the question.

-” Ladies and gentlemen, please contain yourself. “ CEO’s voice penetrated the tumult, evoking momentary silence. -” As to the question, at our Company we consider that small box a gate to the other world, and I assure you that it is its only function. “ The CEO fell silent while exuding self satisfaction.

-’ That's Bs not an answer. ‘ I concluded, while press erupted into a frenzy of questions.

-” Does this mean… “ The brutish corresponded from earlier evidently tried to somehow rehabilitate himself by screaming louder than his more moderate counterparts. -” ...that it’s indeed a quantum computer? Is this why it breaks when studied? Was the company already approached by the military or a government? How were you able to obtain… “

-” I believe that all of us can use a break, let's meet again in fifteen minutes, so everyone can calm down. “ CEO softly said to the microphone and, without waiting, left the podium. Which only incited the raving press.

I closed the inert video and sighed, none the wiser. It didn’t take long to confirm that there were no answers to the questions asked by the brutish gentleman, as I inadvertently began to call the man.-’ So the only possible answer is that they broke the fourth wall in several fields at once, quantum physics, psychology, some sort of biology and also AI, and I bet there’s at least a few other fields that I have missed… ‘ I blinked at a sudden realization. -’ Also, the CEO’s slick to try and discredit the guy who had the most important questions there… ‘‘

I shrugged and decided that I don’t really care anymore, I was just glad that the technology was somehow there. I rose up, feeling big, sluggish, and clumsy. It wasn’t long, but I already missed my avatar’s body, somehow it had grown on me so much that I felt uncomfortable in my original one. -’ If only that world was somehow real. ‘ I wished wistfully, as I made my way to the capsule. -’ Hmm, maybe with time it will turn out like in that one fiction where one could earn real money in game and live in a hospital, strapped to a life support apparatus…Hell, with three times the speed I could live three lifetimes there...  ‘

I sighed in melancholy, while opening the cover. Moments later a familiar numbing sensation enveloped my body and I uttered the words. -” Log in: Ar Ciel. “

* * *

The numbness gave way to a warm, mellow sensation in which I languished for a moment, enticed by the lazy feeling. I almost purred like a cat, when I stretched reflexively, my arms moving from under sleek, velvet covers and resting on the headboard, my body shivered in satisfaction. I sighed in contentment and opened my eyes, to a rich room dimly illuminated with magical lanterns made of glowing gems and mirrors.

Clothilde was still sitting in a nearby armchair, her eyes closed but position rigid. If I made any sort of noise she would probably wake up instantly, ready to assist me in whichever way. I let myself rest on the smooth pillow, lazily enjoying warmth, comfort and a sweet, flowery scent.

Curious, I raised a hand and sniffed, realizing that the smell must have come from an oil that I was massaged with earlier. -’ So nice… ‘ I thought while compulsively differentiating between the scents of lily, orchid, lavender, white iris and some sort of oily, almost scentless substance underneath. To my surprise, after a bit of trying, I was somehow able to recognize the last ingredient, which turned out to be some sort of sunflower oil.

Briefly, I wondered about going back to sleep, but even though I haven’t slept a wink I felt refreshed and restless. -’ Maybe it’s because I used a soft logout and left the body behind… That’s impossible, it's virtual in the first place. ‘ I wondered for a while and decided that there’s no use pondering it over and over. -’ If I am not sleeping it’s wasteful to just lay there. ‘

I bent my legs and rose to a side sitting position, enjoying the smoothness of the silk on my skin. A frothy, thick piece of cloth slid off my belly, making me realize how unexpectedly comforting its warmth felt.

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-” Clothilde… “ I whispered softly, to my surprise maid’s eyes fluttered open and she responded instantly.

-” Yes, Milady. “ Clothilde’s voice was calm and clear, without ounce of tiredness or sleepiness in it. -” How may I serve you? “

-” I believe that I had rested enough. “ I stated, already resigned to face unavoidable pampering at the hands of the maids. After yesterday, it didn’t even feel that embarrassing anymore. -’ Should have gotten used to dresses long time ago anyway. ‘ I concluded.

-” Are you still unwell? Maybe you should rest some more? “ Clothilde asked with a worried expression. -” I assure you that the Master wouldn’t be upset… “

-” No need, Clothilde. “ I interrupted softly. -” I feel well already. No need to be so considerate. “

-” Are you sure? There’s no need to force yourself. “ Clothilde continued insistently.

-” Please be at ease, my… “ While I spoke my cheeks unwittingly turned hot. -” ...my yesterday indisposition is already in the past. “ I somehow managed to sound official despite vehement embarrassment, that I felt at the memory of yesterday.

-” I see, I am glad to hear that, Milady. “ Clothilde affirmed, with relieved expression, and clapped her hands loudly, while murmuring. -” Must be convenient… “

Only then I realized that her murmurs were so quiet that other humans couldn’t understand them, but I could, and the content made me feel embarrassed yet again. My musings were interrupted when other maids entered the room and assembled behind Clothilde, who already rose and stood to the side of the bed.

Pressured by the expectant maids, I removed the nightgown and panties, vividly aware of my body and fluttering sensation in my stomach that came with the thoughts and sights. -’ Do all the girls get aroused that way, or am I special in that regard? ‘ I wondered while closing my eyes and trying my best not to think about my naked body, memories of yesterday still vivid in my mind.

Maids urged me to the edge of the bed and helped me into a pair of white, gossamer like stockings, that reached to my thighs, and a pair of flat heeled, low cut shoes made of dark green, lacquered leather, they looked adorably well on my feet. I was also supplied with a fresh pair of silk panties, which I instantly put on, not wanting to dwell on the fact and wary of the maids *help*.

Afterwards maids had me stand up and step into a pool of dark green fabric which was then hefted upwards. My arms were quickly placed in a long sleeves while maids made final adjustments to make sure that the fabric fits snugly to my torso. Then they fastened dark ribbons on my back and sides.

Moments later, I was brought to the mirror, where they began to brush my hair, while I could take a look at the outcome of their work. The gown was made of dark green silk, heavily trimmed with ruffled, white fabric. The bodice had a square neckline, which was partially covered by a giant, white bow placed just above my chest. I had to admit that the dress matched well and that the image, of a girl side sitting modestly on a stool, was simply...

-’ ...cute. ‘ A thought appeared unwittingly, making me brazenly aware that I was wearing a gown and admiring myself in the mirror. Some time ago that realization would have probably made me feel embarrassed, but… -’ That’s no longer the case. ‘ I thought intransigently, while giving myself a challenging look. Under dauntless gaze of the girl in the mirror, I could feel my confidence growing, so when the maids finished the brushing, I curtsied and thanked them politely, with a smile.

-” At your service, Milady. “ Clothilde responded with a goodnatured smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes. To my surprise she didn’t chastise the other maids, who curtsied in response and instantly began giggling between themselves.

When I was leaving the room I could hear Live’s conspiratory whisper. -” I wonder what happened, she was beet red when we helped her into a gown last time… “

-” Maybe she wants to look pretty for Lord Oliver… “ Ollie chimed in, her voice conspiratory as well and full of glee. -” ...I bet a pink one woul… “ Upon hearing the wild idea I fumbled my step and almost tripped on an even floor.

-” Khem. “ This time Clothilde reacted and tried to silence the maids, but it only made them erupt into soft giggles again.

-’ Pink, really? ‘ I was on a verge of face palming myself over the absurdity of the idea, though I settled for a deep sigh and a small shake of my head .  -’ It’s a strange day indeed when someone tells you that you would look good in pink… and you felt inclined to agree. ‘ I thought in resignation, while maids collected themselves and rushed to escort me.

Ollie hurried to open the door, on the way giving me a smug, encouraging smile, she would have probably sent me a wink if not for the Clothilde’s stern look. Maid’s insistent gaze somehow reminded me about her comment from yesterday. -’ Get a grip! ‘ I thought to myself in desperation, as my flushing cheeks no doubt fueled Ollie’s wild delusions.

Abruptly, I took a deep breath, forcing myself to focus. -’ The Master Assassin is waiting. ‘ I reminded myself and straightened my back, trying to appear as prim and proper as possible. I concentrated on taking small, even steps while traversing the lavishly decorated corridor, paying no heed to Ollie’s occasional glances.

Soon we arrived at a door, it was simple and unadorned, though made out of expensive wood. Ollie sneaked another glance at me, and suddenly took on a prim attitude, no doubt urged by Head Maid’s furrowed brows. Ollie knocked gently and then deftly opened the door, when she entered the room her back was straight and steps flowing, she made a strikingly professional display of stepping to the side with a curtsy.

I swallowed, my heart aflutter with sudden anxiety, and followed the maid, trying my best to mimic her dignified stride. The room changed since my last visit, previously neat and organized look turned into an image of cluttered, urgent efficiency. The desk was covered with maps held in place by random stationery, vials and goblets. A big, wooden board on a wall, which was previously empty, was now overflowing with countless pieces of parchment bolted to the wood with nails and daggers.

I hesitated when my curious gaze inadvertently singled out a hand drawn image of myself, it was pierced by a blade that held it together with Sylthfran’s similarly made likelihood. My eyes widened in surprise, but I was instantly brought back to reality when I looked at the Master.

He changed significantly since we have last met, he seemed much thinner than before, his eyes were bloodshot and sunken, his features were fraught with worry, turning his face almost skull like due to his hollow cheeks. Only thing that remained constant was the look in his eyes - it was stern, calculating and confident.

My heart skipped a beat as I witnessed Master’s miserable appearance, somehow it evoked an alien feeling of… concern.

-” You have returned. Apprentice. “ Master’s voice was deep and husky, almost lifeless compared to before… and threateningly flat.

I was barely able to stifle questioning words that appeared on my lips. Instead, I curtsied deeply and spoke in a regretful voice. -” I am sorry Master. I seem to have failed you. “

A small chuckle surprised me and made me look up, I saw a tiny, wry smile on Master’s drained face. -” That you did… “ He spoke softly. -” ...though by not much fault of your own. I have been hard on you it seems, forgive this old fool for assumin… “

With bone chilling quickness I collated the facts and was struck by a sudden realization of what the Master was going to say. -” No! “ I screamed out my denial, brief memories of the past flashing through my mind - on how I met him, talked with him, got familiar with him and… -’ ...and failed him. ‘ I didn’t know that the one unimportant decision, of going on a random adventure without speaking a word, could have such a big impact. -’ But it did! ‘ I knew, I had done plenty enough of those in my career as an Iron GM.

Unavoidable conclusion followed, dawning on me, that I had somehow grown attached to those people… -’ ...those NPC’s. ‘ I forcefully corrected myself, struggling to put some sort of a dam between me and tidal emotions drowning me in a feeling of a loss.  -’ ...and it is all gone now. ‘ I thought dully as flashes of past interactions, with Master, Oliver and the Maids, rushed through my mind.

I found myself sitting on a floor, with my legs bent back to the sides. -” I am sorry, I didn’t know, I was just playing around...haven’t thought there was so much at stake… “ I whispered fervently, like a sort of mantra, hot tears rolling down my face. With sudden resolution I forced myself to speak coherently, to say the parting words, to run back where I came from. -” I apologize for the loses my halfheartedness had given you, I best leav… “

-” Leaving so soon, Princess? “ Oliver’s mocking words suddenly turned my mood upside down. -” I am not sure if I understood that whole delusion of yours yet… “

-” What?! “ I exclaimed in surprise, suddenly aware of Oliver and his teasing smile as well as suspiciously impassive look on Master’s face. I wasn’t sure what was going on, but I was suddenly full of guesses. -” What do you mean delusion!? “

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Hey~, Mea’s Here~

today’s chapter went a bit shorter than planned, but I had problems writing, hence I had to settle for measly 3,3k words (instead of planned 4k+). Still, it is a good amount considering 2k word long earlier chapters.

Anyhow, I hope you like today’s development too.

Cheers~,

Mea

Ps1 Comments welcome as always.

[ Ps2 The plot thickens~ ]

NEXT CHAPTER: Chapter 35