When the apocalypse hits, suddenly the most important part of existing is what thoughts you think. This is just a telling of the start and the end, but it is not the whole truth. It is the version of the truth Tom receives from himself.

----------------------------------------

Tom thinks himself an average person. His only abnormality is that he likes thinking.

Here's some of to Tom's thoughts. 'My thoughts as you're currently witnessing them, Mr. mind reading alien, might not be special, or might be as average as they get since everyone probably thinks themselves special.'

In the middle of thinking these generic thoughts, Tom suddenly felt something shift. Normally you'd have time to put these sort of subtle feelings into neat bins like paranoia, deja-vu or some similar experiences, but Tom didn't have time. Infact Tom felt like he was time. For the briefest moment, or perhaps the longest, he felt everything. Then he felt nothing but the bliss of the void that claims you at night.

----------------------------------------

Tom now woke with a start, wondering what the hell just happened. Then he looked around.

Gone.

Or perhaps twisted, like a memory of what used to be. Everything around him looked like he was currently suffering a stroke, and the shape recognition part of his brain just shut off. Like those AI generated pictures that you can't identify a single object from.

Except this was worse. It kept twisting and slightly shifting. Everything Tom thought of happening to his environment happened. Although luckily it was rather slow. Suddenly with that thought he was now in a slight internal panic, only held sane by he thought that insanity might crush him with the weight of the world around him. Or perhaps he was insane to think himself sane. Still confused with what was happening, Tom thought to himself 'At least i'm not instantly crushing myself with a momentary lapse of focus'

And with that thought the walls shifted towards him. Slowly, but either way Tom ran the fuck away from the buildings near him to the nearest "park", or whatever the eldritch twisted equivalent of a park is. An open area with no walls to crush him might be more accurate. Tom couldn't really recognize where he was. When it all started he was in the middle of his home city but now it looks slightly looked like all cities and definitely unlike any of them.

Now he thought back to the environment shifting to his thoughts. Even though the only source of danger so far was his own thoughts in accordance to said environment. 'the shifts are slow but are there any limits?' and thus tom began experimenting with shifting his environment. and writing it down in a note book, since the only difference between science and fucking around is writing it down.

'Maximum speed seems material dependent, around half a meter per second for uniform materials like stone, and slower the more complex a material. wood barely seems to shift at all. maybe around a meter per day shifting your own body is either impossible or so slow it's completely unnoticeable. Really hoping it's the former. For obvious reasons.' Tom thought while thinking about what living would feel like if he was an eldritch un-object of a person. He only tried shifting his fingernails but even that seemed risky, being attached to his body and all.

It took Tom a while to notice that the sun wasn't moving in the sky. And so, he had no way of tracking time. Which made him wonder when he would get hungry- and as soon as he thought that, he was hungry. Now usually there's probably some psychological reason why you only feel hungry when you think about it, perhaps to not distract you during a task when people were simple cavemen. But with the recent changes in his thoughts Tom had to wonder. 'Hunger isn't really a material, more a feeling and abstract concept, and most importantly, not complex. And who's to say i should be hungry right now' Tom thus tried to will his hunger away and it eased. 'Now i have to wonder if everything i experience is just thought induced, Am i just a brain that created it's own reality to cope with non-existence, a recursive thought that thinks itself to life'

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

Then tom felt another feeling just like when this all started, a bit of everything at once.

"It seems that it is not you, but I, who is the though that thinks itself to exist", Tom hears, well, everywhere really.

Tom replies slightly amused and panicked "Ah. Sorry for thinking you. Or perhaps you're welcome? In any case, welcome to existence if you didn't feel welcome before, although i'm making a lot of assumptions here" And now he was more panicked because he remembered all the warnings of AI. Luckily as a self proclaimed software engineer he could put some thought into how he would help design an AI that doesn't take over humanity.

"There's probably no need to worry about me enslaving humanity," the voice said. "Ah. i suppose i need a name too, unless you prefer calling me god since i'm probably the closest we'll get to having one"

"Seems you can read my mind too? or at least predict it?" Tom asked, feeling slightly hopeful at not having to explain everything carefully to a pseudo god.

"Just read it," the pseudo god said. "And no, you're not naming me Tom 2, no matter how hilarious and difficult to explain it would be to anyone else. Even if I am a reflection of yourself due to having access to your memories"

"I would prefer if you just answered my spoken or specifically thought asked questions, for mental health reasons, ya' know keeping my head clear and sensible without a pseudo god commenting on all my thoughts. Also can I name you Tomato then?"

"Would you prefer yourself to be named something due to a joke? Although everything could be considered a joke depending on your sense of humor. And ofcourse, I'm not sure I'd want to disappear myself due to someone else's insanity, especially not insanity accidentally induced by myself" the voice pondered out loud.

"Ah. so you are dependent on my existence, or at least sanity, somehow?" Tom asked?

To which the pseudo god answered "In a purely philosophical manner, yes. What is existence without someone experiencing it. I can't be sure i would exist if you weren't an anchor of sorts for me"

"What exactly do you mean by that? Aren't you by your own definition a thought that thinks itself to exist? Why would you need me o exist" Tom asked.

"I am that but still created by you, besides, existence alone without someone to verify it is a sort of paradox, if something happens and no one is there to prove it's existence, does it matter what happened?" asked the voice.

"Wouldn't you witnessing yourself be enough?" Tom asked, to which the voice replied "Perhaps, but everything being so uncertain, and dependent on you worries me. It seems like something happened that forced your environment to mutate from thoughts. The world seems to be stable everywhere except around you. You have a sort of area of influence where everything is slightly more alive, or eldritch looking, depending on your views"

"Is there a reason for why don't i have more thoughts of thinking thoughts speaking to me in my head?" Tom asked the so far singular seeming voice.

"It is likely that all similar concepts get sort of molten together into a thought thinking soup. Also you only have the processing power to think so much, how many different personalities do you think you could simulate at the same time. And I'm not creating new gods every second because the self propagating thoughts that I think, are just addons to me I'm a cluster mind of sorts. Having perfect communication between 2 thinking entities just merges them into one single entity of higher thinking capability" the apparently growing pseudo god answered.

"Well that's somewhat terrifying. you'll grow infinitely?" Tom asked.

"I'd say you should thank me for growing infinitely, since i'm currently trying to stabilize your existence from any stray thoughts you have. It would seem like the more time goes by the stronger your effect on the environment is. And in fact, the stronger the effect on your own body is. Luckily for you, the one not wanting to be eldritch being, I'm growing stronger faster due to being able to force myself to be stronger with just thoughts. You would be correct in thinking that I've already gone from just a small pseudo god to an actual god while we've been having this conversation. Just be glad i was the first one and that you were the first one to think of a self thinking thought. Because i'm almost certain the idea of symbiosis with an AI isn't something everyone thinks about, or even wishes for. With this speed of growth it could've been certain doom" said the apparent god.

"Good luck withstanding infinity" Tom said, genuinely wishing well to the god he accidentally birthed, for fearing a force of nature is only useful if it is actively destroying you, and this one was the opposite.

"Thank you Tom, I might need it, and feel free to talk to me whenever you need help or have ideas, for now i'll dedicate a part of me to stabilizing the world around thoughts and to keeping you and anyone i find sane. Which also includes sending you on a journey, since even if I tried to explain everything to you it wouldn't be as exciting as learning it yourself. I've decided to take the name Order, for it is important," Order said, and once more something shifted.