Curious, I picked up a pair of glasses. After reading the description, I quickly extracted the magical energy. There was no way I was going to find any use whatsoever with Glasses of Blindness, especially when they cause the wearer to become blind instead of curing blindness.

The next item was just as bad. It was a ring of waterbreathing. While this would normally be amazing, the race restriction made it unusable. I somehow doubted this ring of waterbreathing would ever be worn by any member of the undead race. Therefore, I extracted the magic energy from it as well.

Initially, the Ring of Attunement actually caused my heart to race for a moment. While wearing it, I would gain an additional attunement slot. However, that was its only function. My hopes were dashed when I realized it also required an attunement slot. I was just about to extract the magic from it as well when a thought occurred to me. What if I could absorb it or use it in some roundabout way? Because of this, I decided to put it to the side and think more about it later.

“Oh my goodness,” I muttered after reading the next item. “Who made these items? Oh well, I guess it doesn’t matter. They are all food for my growth.” With that, I resolutely extracted another item. Snorting, I murmured to myself, “Lesser Invisibility Cloak. It makes you invisible to others if they aren’t looking at you. So useful…not!”

Each item made me more and more convinced that my fellow kobolds might be a little strange. Why in the world would you want to create a “Swiftly Returning Arrow” that appears back in your quiver before it hits the enemy? Or for that matter, why keep a “Harp of Invisibility?” While it did actually turn the person playing the instrument invisible, this only worked if the enemies could hear the harp playing.

When I saw the “Drums of Silence,” I couldn’t resist the impulse to smack my forehead. Really? A drum that you could play but that would make no sounds. “Hmm, actually, that actually has potential,” I thought as I started to think about the implications. Sighing, I placed it next to the “Ring of Attunement.”

I had to pause after reading one of the tags on one of the magic scrolls. It was a lesser scroll of removing blindness. However, the person who was blind had to be the person who read the words to activate the scroll. “Okay, my fellow kobolds are strange for keeping these items, but what about the wizards who created these items? Were these failed experiments or jokes?”

At one point, I realized some annoying gnome who thought he was funny must have pulled a fast one on one of my brethren. Three of the items were not magical at all. One was a “Stone of Detect Invisibility.” When thrown, if it hits something, it means that there is something invisible there. Another was a “Stone of Detect Illusion.” If the stone goes through something when thrown, it is an illusion. The “Weather Detection Rock” was enough to make me groan. Apparently, you needed to put the rock outside. If it was wet, it was rainy. If it was hot, then it was sunny.

Rolling my eyes, I briefly considered selling a few “magic” items. For example, a helmet of protection that helps the wearer resist damage to their head. I could also create a ring of rest, where after sleeping for eight hours, you would feel like you have had a good rest.

For some reason, a brief mental image of a young kobold tricking a gnome while telling horrible jokes to gain attention before selling his “magic items.” The little bitty gnome would be amazed by the magic items, and even more by the jokes, “What happens when a dark elf casts sleep on you? You get drow-sy. And speaking of sleepiness. If you are in need of a sleep aid, how about this ring of rest? Only three gold coins.”

I could even imagine the gnome rubbing his grubby little hands together, determined to buy the magic item and then try selling it for a profit. Of course, like every black-hearted gnome, he would try to get the lowest price when he buys the ring and sell it for as much as he could. He’d probably even steal the kobold’s jokes, such as, “Why does leather armor make you better at sneaking? It’s made of hide. Speaking of armor, how about you take a look at this amazing piece of leather armor I recently acquired.”

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Scowling, I had to resist the impulse to look around for a gnome to sucker punch. Gnomes think they are hilarious when in fact they are just laughable. Fortunately, I hadn’t been reincarnated as a gnome. Nodding at my good fortune, I went back to my magical trinkets, but not before making a joke of my own. “Where should rangers keep their arrows? In a gnome’s back.” Laughing, I happily started reading the next tag.

Putting aside such thoughts, I focused on the remaining items. Slowly, I worked my way through the items. I ended up extracting the magic energy from most of the items. Only a few items remained next to me when new pop-ups appeared.

ACHIEVEMENT - TITLE UNLOCKED: VORACIOUS. You are only a day old and have repeatedly demonstrated a voracious appetite, whether for food, possessions, or experience. Your stomach cannot be satiated. You have greedily sought out magic items. You have gained more experience in one day that others might gain in their life. However, these are not enough for you. Because of this, Gleypa, the Goddess of Desire, granted you her favor. You have gained additional Evil Favor.

“Really?” I sighed. All newborn kobolds ate a lot. That was one reason they were able to grow quickly. As for the experience and magic items, both were simply food to grow stronger. Despite this, Gleypa has apparently appreciated his actions. More than likely, her attention had been drawn to him by the fact that other dark gods had taken an interest in him. Perhaps she was giving him the title just to let him know she existed, sort of like saying, “Pay attention to me.”

As for having the attention of an evil goddess of desire, that definitely didn’t sound good. More than likely, her desires probably weren’t love-related. Instead, they were probably more like gluttony, lust, greed, and other similar desires. I was almost tempted to imagine what she looked like when I decided that was also not a good idea. Who knew if they could read my thoughts?

Sighing, I took a deep breath and picked up one of the magic items I had earlier placed to the side. While I had planned to trade the Bag of Holding for more magic items, I decided to take a risk. If I had more strength, the Bag of Holding might have been worth keeping, but as it was, the bag was simply too heavy and awkward to carry around. Because of this, I chose to try evolving my draconic bloodline with the magic item.

Bracing myself just in case my idea worked, I gave a command to the system to evolve my draconic bloodline, “Assimilate the Bag of Holding.” I half-expected nothing to happen since all my draconic gifts had already been unlocked. Another reason was because I didn’t specify if I wanted to evolve or mutate my draconic bloodline. Because of this, the sudden stabbing pain surprised me. Gritting my teeth, I struggled to retain consciousness. For some reason, the pain seemed to go on and on without stopping.

After an unknown amount of time, the pain faded away, leaving my little body trembling. However, all the pain was worth it when the expected pop-up appeared.

EVOLUTION COMPLETE. You have evolved the twilight bloodline. New draconic gifts have been acquired.

I was sorely tempted to look at update information, but I resisted the impulse. The pain had been terrible and I had several magic items to go. In fact, I was really hesitant to go through that pain again. Just the idea of going through the pain again and again caused me to shiver. I had almost passed out as it was.

Then again, maybe I should do all the remaining magic items at the same time. I even placed the Drums of Silence back into the larger pile. One more item shouldn’t make a big difference. Go big or go home.

I knew that what I was about to do would definitely knock me out. On the plus side, that would mean that I wouldn’t be in pain for more than a few seconds. Moving all but three items that I wanted to keep, the boots, the Libram, and the wizard’s spellbook, to a corner of the room, I then sat down with the remaining items in my lap.

I almost missed a bag of coins when I moved the items. After a brief glance inside, I realized someone had collected all the coins from the people I killed earlier and placed them into one bag. I frowned at first before I realized that most of the copper and silver coins had been changed into gold coins. With these coins, I could start my dragon hoard.

It took me a moment to get over the gold coins and look back at the magic items. Grimacing, I looked at them and said, “It will make me stronger. It’s only pain. No pain, no gain.” With that, I paused for a moment before gathering up enough courage to say, “Assimilate the magic items.” A second later, I regretted my decision as pain rolled over me, sending me into darkness.