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38.3 - Matthew

Shadow Wood, Desmond, 10416 P.C.

Darkness cloaked Matthew as he slowly made his way up the old porch steps of the Lenox home, doing his very best not to make a sound. The moon was full, scattering shadows across the ground and against the side of the house. He lifted a fist to knock, grimacing at how the sound of his knuckles against the wood echoed off rather loudly into the night. Shadow Wood wasn't the most patrolled town around, and the patrolmen didn't scare him anyway, but he didn't want to make a scene.

It took a minute, but sure enough, the door creaked open. Phillip's wrinkled face peeked out at him, eyes growing wide. "Matthew?"

"It's me," he whispered, letting the elderly man grab his arm and pull him inside the house with surprising strength. The man squinted at him in the darkness, patting down grey hair with a fumbling hand to his head.

"We thought you were dead. We saw the execution on the screen, but it cut out before the sword came down!"

How convenient. "I'm not dead." Matthew didn't have time to explain to the man what had happened. "Are Hannah and the girls safe?"

Phillip nodded quickly. "No one has come."

"Matthew?" He turned to see a shadowed figure peeking around the corner into the entryway. Abby let out a muffled cry of relief, dashing to him and throwing herself into his arms. He caught her, surprised at her affections. When she pulled away, he saw the tears glistening in her eyes. "I thought you were dead."

"What else is new?"

She smiled slightly. "Are the others okay?"

"They're outside town. We weren't sure if it was safe to come."

She let out a long breath, resting her head against his chest. "I'm so glad you're alright." She looked up quickly, hungry for answers. "What's happened? We thought you were going west, not east."

"Zusia wasn't on the itinerary," Matthew admitted. "We got ourselves captured. Look, we'll tell you everything, but right now the others are waiting." He looked at Phillip. "Is it alright if we stay here for the night?"

"Of course!" the man said quickly, his head bobbing.

So trusting. It could very well be a disastrous mistake. "I should warn you that we have another companion."

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"Who?"

Matthew hesitated. The unease roiled in his chest. "Terrence Fares."

Phillip's mouth opened in surprise. Tears sprang into the old man's eyes. "Oh, blessed Creator, you've found him! You've truly found him!"

Abby shushed her grandfather. "Pappy, get Mammy up. We'll need to make them beds."

"Oh, yes, yes, of course," the man stuttered, turning and quickly hurrying off. Matthew could hear the man's whispered exclamations as he left.

"Matthew." Abby was facing him, looking up into his face. No surprise showed in her eyes at his words, only concern. He had nearly forgotten how good she had become at reading him. "What's wrong?"

"What? Nothing."

"Your face. I know that look. It's the look you always got before something really horrible happened."

He rubbed a hand down his face. "Really? I don't..." She was right. This was that aching, horrible feeling that told him something was about to go horribly wrong. It had been torturing him ever since the Gartirih incident.

Trust, trust, trust. The mantra didn't work anymore.

Abby touched his arm, hesitant. She was naive, yes, but she knew him. He knew she did. "Tell me what it is."

"I don't know what it is, I—" He closed his eyes, taking a slow breath. "I... don't trust him, Abby."

She searched his eyes. "Who?"

"Terrence. I don't trust him."

"You think he's lying?"

Matthew didn't want to believe it. Not when Stephanie seemed to trust him so willingly, not when he had assisted her in their rescue. To doubt Terrence was to doubt Stephanie, and the thought was a physical pain in his chest. "I don't know, I just... I don't know what to do. So much has happened, and I thought I trusted them but..." He faltered. Who did he trust anymore? "I don't know what to do."

"You're scaring me, Matthew."

He hated that. He hated feeling so helpless. His whole life he had been helpless, and now, when he had finally felt as though he had a grip on things, he was slipping again. "Just..." He didn't know what to tell her. "Guard yourself. Don't trust anyone."

She nodded slowly, her face firm. "I don't trust any of them but you."

The thought didn't comfort him. Matthew wasn't even sure he could trust himself anymore. He couldn't shake the horrible feeling that they were placing Abby, her grandparents, and little Bethany in terrible danger. If his worries were founded, and if anything happened to any of them... he'd have no one to blame but himself.

He was so very tired. Tired of the burden he bore and the sorrows it bled. But still, he pressed on.