Chapter 4
Pian G. Monk‘s Moon-Gate and The Young Novice-Monk Xend’-Zeon
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So the splice-cracking was left ajar behind him, either detaching nor clinging at the Monastery-Gate passing the Moon-Gate.
Pian G.’s In-Betwwen Body would turn his head, smile palely, hold palms together, attachingly, the same wind would blow gently, shadows of the skies float on the walls of the Moon-Gate as thin as a coat of film. Insects had been woken up, their voices of all sorts flocked in amidst the leaves flapping, projecting mountains' dews from all directions.
A young man carried a bamboo rucksack that was rather bulky on his backs, noticing how the overnight heavy dew had covered up the steep stone-steps.
"Master, you looked pale." Inadvertently, both of them eager to reflect upon their lives. "let's go deep."
Faces of the graceful Old Master Sand'-Huey Monk, and the mildly stern Blood Second Brother Chank'-Jack had consequently been summonsed by his sub-consciousness.This figure's thought stirred, he was on the slanting steps and it stood a 6 foot tall burly posture that belonged to The Novice Monk Xend'-Zeon.
One looks up from far from the lush pine-trees beneath, seeing vine-rattans curved as the step-stones curved, demanding the Novice Monk descend with great caution on the greyed dragon-spine.
The dragon saw the sea of clouds galloping across the abyss. The years of crouching tigers and hidding dragons had rushed off, and time flew by, suddenly they found that The Era of The Tame Dynasty had arrived in the The First Imperial Year of the Martial Virtue named alluded to the pioneering emperor.
In 618 AD, this young Novice Monk was ready to set off for a long journey on foot. The morning light appeared as lif ights of glow-worms in late autumn glittered, and the chills had been cold. He braced up.
Energies swamped from all phenomena, but no one knew where he was heading?
Let's get down first and the bottom of the mountains will make things clear for myself.
He saw that the morning mist was vast, the sea of clouds was rushing, he turned, looked back; the Monastery-Temple that had been nurturing him all those years; supporting him in Buddhism studies while removing all kinds of difficult obstacles in this jungle monastery-dojo; stood majestically above the spinal stone-steps which had curved up till half the height of the mountain.
“Namo Original Guru~Namo Original Guru!Namo Original Guru!” He held his palms together and chanted The Original Guru’s name of The Sakyamunin Buddha.
"Monks and practitioners who had travelled from far of all directions seeking refuge in the Mountains," he remembered they told him when the first time he got there.
They must have now arisen together with the natural alarm-clock sounded off by the nature.
Of course, they must have lined up filing in as quietly as the fish in the Life Relief Pond at this time. They would enter The Great-Strength of Sakyamuni Buddha Main Hall in solemnity for the Morning Chanting Session and now the young Novice Monk would have heard the Morning Bell breaking the recluse solitude, the vibration sending sound-waves traveling as far as the edges of the mountains and forests.
His Blood Second-Elder Brother Chank’-Jack Monk should have relaxed his legs in Lotus Position, in that back of his right foot pressing rest on his left thigh and back of the left foot crossing the calf all the way pressing down on his right thigh. Qi and smooth blood stream felt orbitting his spines in a verticle manner. Face turned pinkly graceful.
"Did you rest well?"
He would have asked. The candle must have swayed slightly. He must have already realized that his Younger Brother had left, the small room seemed vastly empty in an instant,.
He realized that the bamboo rucksack could be as bulky as half his size, as the dragon-tongue-like bamboo shade curned to the front on top of his head was protruding. It was meant for protecting him from the elements the nature on a long journey on-foot, And now it had also disappeared.
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Last night, he finished his duties.
He walked by the halls and corridors, cup lights were dimmed piercing weakly through the paper doors and windows on his way to his tiny chamber shared with his Blood Brother Master Chank’-Jack Monk. He was supposed to be calm and compose after a day’s hard work in cultivation to tame clustered thoughts arisen out of the thin air. After all, he had been chaste and simple-minded from his background and life experience. But he found his mind entangled and apparently incorrigible. He couldn’t help but reliving the conversation he had with the Abbot Master during the day.
"Did you really think so?"
The Abbot looked thoughtful and well-meaning to The Young Novice Monk, who was eager to express his opinion from his perspective after having studied certain commentaries during the morning Sūtra Learning Session.
He was devout to the quest in searching for meaning in his reflective perusal of textual commentaries that would take years for others to comprehend. He was ignorant about how others might have looked at his attitude in terms of the frowned upon showing off, though. Or any arrogance in voicing out opinion hastily and prematurely in that matter of fact.
He never considered the hierarchical manneristic interaction might become an issue in the present context. All and all, a naïve young novice eager to discuss the subject matter and absolved in his quest for purpose and meaning of cultivation for life.
"Don't you think so, My Abbot Master?"
To the perspective of the Abbot, his attitude changed during certain opinion expressed by the Novice Monk. He felt disrespected or at least offended in a subtextual context that the Novice Monk was supposed to be carefully aware of.
His facial composure had changed indiscernible to the Novice Monk. He was at least oblivion. And he was Instead eager to receive a favorable response from The Abbot. The next second he heard The Abbot sounded off a nasal huff.
“Hmmf!”
The Novice Monk was left alone after seeing The Abbot Master flushed his long and wide Cassock sleeve and he realized that that wasn’t a promising response without disdain. He felt tainted as thoughts of The Ten Directions flocked in his mind like dots of inks of insects flocking in.
Apparently he frowned upon the thoughts to dislike it and he felt sharp heartfelt entanglement, unable to weave, and that made his footstep heavy on his way to enter the room.
That was what the Monk who sat crossed leg in The Lotus Position heard when The Novice Monk entered.
He saw the light of the candle swaying slightly. His Blood Second Brother was still meditating before hours of retiring from the long day. The Second Brother Venerable Deputy Abbot of the Temple, Chank’-Jack Monk opened his eyes. His face sterned and he released his legs which totaled eight hours of legs crossing with a mastery without numbness by the sudden releasing.
He then stared at The Novice Young Monk who made a sound and put his legs up on the hard planked bed next to his Brother’s.
"You shouldn't go against The Abbot Master! How many years have you completed the Monkship Seniority? How many have the Abbot completed? ”
The Novice Monk Xend'-zeon pursed his lips slightly. The Monk Brother looked at him and saw that he lowered his head, lights were dimmed from the candle. He glanced out the window for a second, thoughtfully, the autumn chills seemed heightened, and the night seemed deep and long.
"Well, you have covered so many Sūtras and commentaries for Confucius philosophy in your studies; you have memorized them by heart and you are well versed in quoting the principles appropriately when debating with others. And now with such mundane ability, you must have thought that you had attained vast wisdom therefore you feel aloof and domineering, but you actually do not understand how the world works. You couldn’t be careless about how people think and how you could have easily offended them. So, I was deeply disturbed when The Abbot complained to me and I was equally disappointed in you.”
He heard him and his heart sunk. Cheeks turned warm as blood flushed up from suppression of emotion that he did not know what of, nor rather disinterested in finding out a way to fathom its whereabouts at that juncture.
It was rather unusual for the Blood Second Brother to tell him off after all these years since The Youngest Brother had attained an adulthood age. Their background demanded that they maintained a caring and encouraging relationship. All those years, he had cared for The Younger Brother while cultural contexts demanded that reprimanding for any negative traits should be left to more elderlies. However, since they have no one left in their family, the Brother would thus reluctantly take up the duty. It seemed like that he somewhat showed regret in resorting to strong words that The Youngest Brother had ever heard from him.
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The cheeks of The Young Novice Monk Xend'-zeon turned warm. and goosebumps crawled upon sides of the cheeks toward earloops. He resorted to hiding them, though unseen, through lowering his head and eyebrows, except that he couldn't help but blink.
"I’ve just made a few comments on the subject of the Buddha Dharma's method of practice of The Vinaya-Precept, The Equanimity Trance of Samādhi and Nirvāṇic-Wisdom. How was that I was wrong to try finding out whether you should be in or out of the world for the sake of practicing? I wanted to find out the perspectives why cultivation should be carried in the hidden forests far from the people who supported us and needed us....Unexpectedly, I had in a way offended The Abbot Monk with the uncalled-for questions. He walked away from me, and I... ."
He lowered his chin further, as if that was how a child could react to a telling off, in front of his Blood Second Brother who had been practicing much earlier as a monk in the same lineage at the Jungle Monastery far from the city.
People travelled for days crossing jungles and climbing mountains before arriving at the forest dojos as choices of reclusive cultivation.
Candlelight shone on his face, cheeks youthful, eyebrows turning frowned adding weight to his mood since the reliving of the event brought alive now.
He was full of grievances.
A good looking Oriental complexion, rather anxiously disturbed in perspective, like an Oriental Benedictine who had turned rather a pale handsomeness after living too long periods of sessions contemplating the windy chills and misty dews up in the peaks of the mountains and the valleys stretching into the forests.
Those words kept lingering in his mind. He couldn’t weave it nor strike them off though he was witty with logic and words to find himself at this juncture holding his urges to respond. He then swallowed all the words that had almost got uttered through the edges of his lips. Probably that suppression would never find day lights and it would forever rot deep down in his mind’s stomach.
“Brother, we have gone through so much over the years…”
That was what he could come up with up until now. The Elder Brother burst into tears hearing The Youngest Brother’s remark.
He and his Second Brother went to several dojos over the mountains and jungles. His Elder Second Brother’s reputation for preaching and commenting on Sūtra and Śāstra-Commentaries over the years won him quite some affirmation. As of the Young Novice Monk, he chose to continue with his preference of studying through researching the wisdom of ancient sages since his childhood and he had familiarized himself in depth with the Scriptures found in the libraries of the dojos.
Now that at the Adornment Serenity Temple, The Novice Monk raised questions to The Abbot Monk of whether “True Relucsing is Carried out in Big Cities” and issues pertaining to Four Principles of “The Exceptions to The Forbidden Precept-Acts and Conditions of Breaching of Abiding by The Precepts.”
He never thought that nor he ever realized that such neutral questions could have been comprehended subtextually on their contexts of sustaining of precepts in their efforts. As such, never had he known that a rather strong reaction expressed by The Abbot Master. He realized though that that could have caused complication and embarrassment to his Second Brother’s status as The Deputy Abbot at The Temple He now felt an aftermath of a possible ostracization of some sort that he had worked so dearly for over the years amongst all the Jungle Monasteries.
That was extremely significant for The Second Elder Brother, as he preferred to carry out cultivation in a forestry environment deep in the jungles far from people; thinking that his Dharma quest of The Deep-Active-Meditative Flow of Equanimity Samādhi should appropriately be attained this way.
He seemed to be too content with the lives accompanying the Morning Bells and Evening Drums in a recluse and extremely harshly lonely life.
Deep down in his heart, The Novice Monk seemed to think that it should be more than what cultivation appeared to be. He hardly thought about it over the years though until he reached a state of cumulation of studies and relationships. He had no inclination of equaling recluse cultivation to escaping the world; nor did he affirm that that should be the only method that the Buddha had promoted for monks in his era.
"Second Brother, I......" He secretly sighed, hearing himself in a softly faltered whisper.
"My Young Brother, didn't you realize? The instructions in the Buddhist Scriptures about keeping the precepts are for you to practice, not for you to discuss? Let alone for you to question the way the senior monks should have them carried out?” He paused, “You might want to reflect upon your uncalled for attention toward how others carry out their practice and why would you care if others chose a way of reclusing? How so you feel the need to unveil the taboo issue? You need to understand seniority and hierarchical phenomena, right, Brother? "
Oh? Am I doing this? Or I just wanted to better understand the principles of practice that I have been carrying out. I also wanted to find out the underlying principles why the Buddha promoted the precepts related to The Nirvāṇic Attainment. Brother, I don't have the intention of judging others. If that was what you meant for me…
The Young Novice felt suffocated within his stream of oceanic thoughts. But he couldn’t seem to express what he could logically phrased all those questions subliminally. They felt suppressed and further they felt drowning. He couldn’t manage to have them voiced no matter how hard he wanted to try. He just couldn't say it. Therefore, he simply quietly listened to The Elder Brother.
“My Youngest Brother, you could have been spoiled by our deceased Mother since you were the youngest child….” He paused, realizing The Younger Brother’s mind swayed away as he had talked for long and The Younger Brother immediately realized that he should pay closer attention and show more interest in what The Elder Brother had tried so hard to carry on.
"Just take care of your own practice and precept cultivation. I know that you have been prone to thinking about fate and life, and you tend to ask questions about The Truth since you were young. That's also been respected by Confucianism. My Youngest Brother, you have been performing rather well in your learning curves since you were a child, and now you are striving to dig deeper into the Buddha Dharma principles and you have many questions that need answers. But, you know, you came from a childhood environment that resembled a carefully cared for tiny flower in the greenhouse. After the demise of both our parents, you seemed to be thrown into similar environment...though…"
His eyes warmed up, tears swelling.
"Well, after I came here under the protection of you My Second Brother, I still couldn't get out of the greenhouse..."
The Master Chank’-Jack Monk heard it, tears bursting into his eyes.
The Novice Monk sighed softly and fell into deep contemplation.
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When he was five years old, his mother said, "Look, I watched my mother worried sick about my grandfather’s career as the Imperial Magistrate, his allies and rivalries, which were more in that matter of fact. Position and status were fragile which we did not care much for, but for his safety and well being, or rather for the family members of the whole clan; whose lives were unfairly linked to the powers to chop off your heads by the Imperial Families. Throughout her life, my Mother was worried sick. Now, My Dear Husband, The Imperial Officer, you have become a County Magistrate, I carry the same worries and anxiety every day for your safety and well-being. Or all of us in that matter of fact. The imperial officialdom is like a battlefield, so I absolutely can’t let our child develop a career-pathway toward that direction."
"But, My Dear Wife, do you have to go this far requesting our Second Son to leave home and to become a recluse-monk in the North East forests? Our son is young and vibrant. He has a promising life ahead of him…” And tears rolled out like broken pearls on his cheeks.
"This is our fate.” She seemed determined. “We can't escape from our fate. Not now. What’s pertinent rather is that, My Dear Husband, that you are confused and ignorant about the fact that our Second Son is the next target of your rivalries. Death penalty out of fake charges will fall upon his head. Or as what you had said to be his promising life…I cannot let our Sue'-Er fall prey, it was too cruel for me to even think about…but, can't you see it?"
And he wept and wailed.
The Blood Second Brother teared up and Kowtowed three times to her Mother only before turning his back; as the Father had left for not able to witness his departing. Without looking back, he had just followed their Old Venerable Master Sand’-Huey for a monkship ceremony in the North East of The City of Forever-Peace. That was almost fifteen years.
The Young Novice’s then named Chank’-Yek, carrying a silk cloth meaning as compared to a commoner cloth for the Second Son’s name of Chank’-Sue’ . Chank’-Yek had little understanding of what had happened except that he felt the sharp heartbreak of his Second Brother's going away. With his Talent of Verbatim Memory, he memoried almost all what he was given to learn from the books of Confucian and he could comprehend the underlying principle that guided his Second Brother to have reacted in such an extreme manner fulfilling his utmost filial piety toward their Mother’s request and solution.
But he still felt that he was extremely weak amidst all the knowledge he had learned.
"My Youngest Brother, our life is to be a monk. Brother, you also live up to our Mother’s last wishes. You have made outstanding achievements in the study of Buddhism. But, My Dear Brother, you should know that you have never paid attention to the skillful convenience of interacting with others. You are okay to express your opinion. "
Maybe, it was true that this Young Novice had little experience.
“That year, our Father died of illness, you would recall that it all related to his County Magistrate position and the dire relationship he had with the imperial family and officials. People have conflicting intentions and would resort to betrayal, persecution and death-threats as means to their ends… That was dire, My Youngest Brother. ..Do you remember that I travelled home for his funeral and you hugged me, wailing, I suppose you had grown up in a way overnight witnessing how family, life and fate could have changed drastically overnight….Wasn’t that's what the Buddha told us?... You probably understood how so many orphans from wars that surrounded us that we did not really care for, but it should have strengthened your ability to have brought forth the mercy and compassionate and loving thoughts for beings around you. I had great compassion for our Mother……” His tears kept rolling down, and the Young Novice joined him, forcing suppressed sighing-like breaths through his nose, “I would not refute any of her requests of me, even she wanted me to leave home for monkship, I wanted to honor her wishes and I wanted to honor my own wishes to spend the rest of my young life for the sake of cultivating in forest monastery dojos.”
“I do miss our family, Second Brother. I understand how our Mother has impacted your life. You had a promising life ahead of you. But you managed to let go all of all. Your flourishing Magistrate Exams and the promised top-ranked imperial-positions awaiting. All the wealth, wives and offspring and a rich and comfortable life ahead of you.”
He remembered the two brothers hugged and cried. He remembered the deep abandonment feeling he had at the juncture, as if he was thrown by fate in an unknown genre of absconment.
It seemed like that it wasn't an orphanage and fate per se; it was too tangible of how the emperor, his officials and community managed to destroy lives and livelihood in a splash of a second. All vanished overnight. It was so real under one’s eyebrows.
Both had now become orphans and had been relying on each other to continue their lives deep down the rarely treaded paths. They had been close and positively encouraging and cared for each other, although he received more attention from the Elder Brother.
The Second Elder Brother led him to The City of Look’-Young, the North East City of The City of Forever-Peace that The Emperor Tame Dyke-Zeon had later frequented to tackle the Warlords of the Jurchen Clan. The Pure Land Temple they both sought refuge and as a learning-venue in Buddha Dharma. He took the vows to be The Boy-Cultivator toward the pursuing The Novince-Monkship and he excelled and progressed to The Novice-Monkship a few years later at the age of thirteen, which nobody had expected. It was certainly a nobly ascetic decision that anyone could have ever made at any age of life …”
The Novice Monk felt that old memories had stirred up his settled mind and that of his Second Brother’s after all these years. They had been embedded so profoundly and deep in their souls. Especially, he realized how that had carried meanings for him.
Thoughts had monkeyed up as he started to find himself contemplating uncontrollably about how from now onwards to promise himself a fruitful environment, how he could locate thoughtfully friendlier masters to further his cultivation pursuit.
He might have agreed with whatever had happened , but what he really cared and looked forward to was how he could and would sustain a devotion that in no way to be swayed under any kind of dire situations, however rarely treaded the pathway could be.
He did not like the idea, though, of how his thoughts fell into the pits of judging the intentions of others in his quest.
He felt tripped on the trivial yet seemingly pertinent interactive skills he had lacked. He thought sincerity could be the only tool needed. On top of that, he merely wanted to materialize one’s own devotion to the promises he had made to his demised Mother; and to his Gurus.