Here’s something unintentional, a story of my life. Not interesting, not at all memorable. Just a story of love lost, disaster and pain followed after! Pay attention! I'll tell you about myself. With a taste of savory delight. It was at a place in my life, when I was younger. A time when I was naive and full of ……. SHIT! It started off as a normal day, me playing around outside with friends. I remember it like it was yesterday. Well, I'm pretty sure I was twelve. You get the gist. My friends and I were playing Mixup, which is where you pick or create a character to be and then a setting. Imagination could go anywhere!

I had chosen what I thought was extraordinarily epic. An alien whose planet was close to its sun. Who had recently crashed on earth because his ship was critically damaged in a battle for his home. My best friend Sahra, had chosen a witch that could manipulate the mind into thinking anything. My twin brother David, was an ex-soldier who had been experimented on. He was given heightened senses with future technology. We all met up after they investigated my crashed ship and we worked together ever since. The scene was on earth and on the location of a missing laboratory. A two-hundred-acre, three-story base just disappeared with no explanation! We thought maybe the lab was troubleshooting new tech. An invisible forcefield or something. There was nothing to signify that theory to be true! We saw something afar and started to follow it. We took a few steps, Sahra the witch spoke and asked!

“Jake, what's the plan? Where are we going?”

I spoke. “I really don't know, I haven't figured that out. I guess we'll find out.”

David, my brother, decides to open his whacked-out, oversized mouth and says" Do you ever figure anything out?".

I flat out told him to "shut his wide open butthole" Sahra and I both started laughing! We thought that was the most inappropriate, hilarious thing ever spoken. Sahra was having a hell of a time, so much so she started crying. Which made my brother David start laughing as well! After the fit stopped I noticed someone moving in next door. I asked David if he knew who they were. He said “No” with a dumb-founded look, then proceeded to tell me “Go find out for yourself. Chicken Wipe!”. I did but not without asking Sahra to go with. I felt comfortable and confident with her near. She brought positivity with her constant negativity, don’t know how that worked. It did! She had always been there for me. Maybe that's where the positivity came from. Sahra and I asked the new neighbor if she needed help moving.

She said “Yes” with hesitation while looking me up and down. There wasn’t much of the moving left. We finished with haste and after she invited us inside to talk. It was getting late so Sahra decided to head home while I stayed.

“My name's Jake.” I said.

“I’m Mellany, thanks for the help.” She said.

“Yeah sure, anytime. Where you from?”

“I’m from the town of Tellsik”

“Isn't that on the other side of the island?”

“Yeah, It’s a ways!” She said with sincerity.

“How do you like it here in Tellwire?”

“ The city seems to be underdeveloped!”

“All of Mordum Island is like that!”

I explained to her a little of the island's past and that this place was not very old. We talked a little more then I left. She seemed to be getting tired. I thought it was a well-planned idea! I headed home with a smile on my face and a thought, she had left me with. The thought of permanent happiness.

Going back home, I noticed that my brother wasn't there nor was my mother. My brother was known to wander off without notice. He snuck out a lot. My mother though was a different story. She would always tell me where she was going, she was the worrisome type. If i didn't know where she was i couldn't get to her in case i needed help. She always said if I can't find her it's because I'm not looking. She knew that I was okay on my own but always worried about me. Hince, the worrisome mother.

David was always hanging out with a bad crew, but never got in major trouble. That night I knew something was up, but didn't really care enough to get worried it wasn’t late, so I figured that they went to the store. For hours!

The next day Sahra called me asking if i knew what happened to my brother and if my brother was home.

“ Hey Sahra, whats flippin the bucket?” I asked.

“Where is David? Is he at home? Have you seen him since yesterday?”

She sounded a lot like my mother! Very frantic in nature.

“Calm down, He probably stayed with a friend.”

“I mean probably, but i tried calling Leanna and she didn't pick up” She said.

“What's my mom going to know?” I asked with a hint of confusion. I shortly realized both my brother and mom were still gone. Later they both showed up yelling at each other.

“Why the FUCK would you go and do stupid shit like that? I shouldn't have to bail you out!” My mother screamed angrily.

“It's none of your business! Don't be a dolt!” David said equally as loud. Then stormed off to his room. Leaving the house full of hostility and silence!

I was never told what had happened that day. Every time i’d bring it up to anyone being my mom, my brother, or Sahra even. They would change the subject or just tell me to forget about it. My brother had some issues with some bad people. Getting into illegal contraband. I guess him and a friend got caught with some of it. That's all I really know.

Years went by. Friends found were no longer, for reasons like time slipping away or losing communication. I ended up marrying Mellany and continuing on with my life. Content, for a while! Everything was going well. I was happy with what I had. Not long after I got this amazing job at his highly valued company, making animal treats. I loved everything about it. The people were kind and full of heart. The pay was great! I had felt like things couldn’t get any better!

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Mellany and I were living with her parents at the time due to issues that pushed us to do so. We would argue constantly. She would start at it with every opportunity she had. Nagging me about not doing what I was told quick enough. She was violent at times, throwing things like lamps, plates or basically anything she could put her hands on. Sad thing is the lamps or various objects wouldn’t always break when they hit. It wasn't pleasant. I had caught her talking to someone else. The conversions were very explicit in nature. I felt I had to confront her about it. That was not a bright idea, physically.

“ Who is this you're talking to?” I asked with deep concern.

She would avoid the question each time I asked. With each question I grew more and more aggravated.

“ Who is this?” I asked with anger and intent on finding the answer. She wouldn’t tell me so I walked out with no plan on returning.

I was having problems trying to find a place to live. There for a while I was living in my car. Luckily, Sahra had my back. I had stayed with her until I had seen an apartment in Tellwire close to my job. The place was a roof over my head, so I took it. The inside was decent. Not much to complain about. Don't get me wrong, there was stuff to complain about. Didn’t feel the need. Cleanliness is what it seemed.

Just as pain can be found

Love can be lost

There is nothing that can pay the cost

Laying on the ground praying to be found

Wishing i never loved

Soaring like a dove

My hand it touches my heart’s desire

While I’m being strangled by a wire

The fire of passion i once had

Dissipates and makes me sad

I find subtlety and safety in what i once knew

Hoping the pain finds elsewhere to be

Knowing the hurt

Knowing the love

Feeling like I’m getting a kick

That’s worse than a shove

As it all fits like a glove

You never know when something amazing happens or when something demolishes your way of life. Forcing you to rebuild yourself from the ground up. Not knowing when it’s going to end or even begin.

My brother was always there for me in my time of need. So I called him.

“Hey David!” I said when he answered.

“Hey long time no talk, why is that?

"I've been busy I promise. I called for a reason.

"Well of course everything has a reason behind it. What's up?"

"I'm having doubts!"

"About what?"

Where my life is going? Who I'm going to be? Who I'm going to be with?

I'll give you some advice, Life is a teacher with hard lessons. Learn from it. Let life lead you and listen, you'll be better for it. Promise!

“You are a very wise man! Why is that?”

“I finally Listened” He said.

“Thanks, I think I understand. I think”

“Good! I’ll talk to you later.” He said with a hasted tone as if he had something else to do.

I hung up the phone, and thought about what he had said. It seemed simple enough. “Life is a teacher with hard lessons”! Although how is that going to help?

Something else happened that day at work, I met this very lovely, heart drenching, eye catching, hispanic woman! I don't know what it was but i felt obligated to talk to her. I did just that. She was a newbie. When you get hired You have to wear a green colored shirt. The shirt was sort of a lime green but a tad darker. A not so distracting color on a very distracting person. You can tell I was working hard on trying not to look at her, because I was not succeeding.

I asked her if she liked it here. I did not get an answer, so I let her be. I think she thought I was racist or just terrifying to look at. The only thing left to do was wait. It took a few weeks before she started talking to me. I honestly thought she was never going to. Maybe she realized I was looking at her too often. Which would be understandable if she decided not to ever talk to me. She did though!

“ So I don't know if I told you my name.” I said.

“It’s Jake right?” She said.

“Yeah Jake Lovelet”

“Lovelet, that's intriguing! My name is Candy Merrez.”

That name seems most definitely Fitting.”

“So sweet!” She replied with a cute shy smile.

We had continued talking all day after that, asking each other questions and chatting with friends. While working. I feel I need to make that clear. We were working. I promise! I was happy when I would talk to her. Singing to myself at home and on my way to work. Then things had to get awkward, I realized what I was singing about. It was about love. I was singing about love. I was even starting to sing at work while on the production line. I would make up the songs. On occasion! One of the songs lyrics read:

She’s a beautiful sight for a man of might

She has a heart of gold

She’s got me sold

A star at night so incredible bright

Her beauty is truly on the inside

Although it shines throughout

The song was short! I was mainly humming a tune, then added a poem to it. Before I continue I need to explain something, so that what I say further in the story would make sense. At my work we deal with production and distribution of baked pet treats, for dogs. We have lines of conveyor belts, which is how the product travels to one place in the factory to another. I work in the packaging part of the distribution process. Now let's get back to the story. I wouldn't sing when I was near people, I'm shy like that. Candy was walking by and noticed I was singing. She complimented me!

“You have a beautiful voice” she said with a smiling glow. I looked at her and said nothing. Simply smiled back. My head was in chaos with thoughts like, “ Oh my gosh! She heard me.” and “You idiot! Why?”. Then she asks “ Do you sing often?”. I replied with “No, I recently picked up the inspiration too.” I was not expecting what she’d say next. I thought she would end the conversation there. No, she asks”Where did you get your inspiration?”. She had utterly and completely caught me off guard! I was terrified to tell her the truth, also did I know the truth. Was she the reason? So instead i told her “My wife.”.

Our relationship had gotten closer over time. We would talk somedays or just say hi, others. Those days were magnificent!

Let's take a break from all this madness and go back to a day on

Cliffed Lake. The lake was one of my favorite places to go as a kid. Back then I lived near the lake as well. In a town called Bennik. I enjoyed every moment I had there. In the summer I would jump off the fishing dock and swim for hours. Waiting for life to jump in with. The lake had a beautiful view when the sun would set. Time would stand still only for minutes as if life didn't matter but yet mattered all at once. This time I was there to blow some steam off, because my mother and I got into an argument about school work I needed to finish. I was not doing well and did not like listening in general. Teachers were an authority figure and I was not a fan.

I was sitting on the dock watching the sunset. Admiring how the sun would reflect it’s colorful beauty onto the water. The rocky cliff off in the distance would bring a calm feeling to mind. The sound of calm waters hitting the bank and dock itself. Had a relaxing vibe that would compliment serenity. At the lake I would reminisce of so many memories as a kid.

The sun had set, it had gotten dark. I had seen some headlights coming towards me, heading down the dirt road. They parked, stepped out, it was of course my mother here to pick me up to head back home.

“Hello Laenna! Come to take me back. I will not go willingly.” I said loudly with a snarky sarcasm.

How many times do I have to tell you to call me mom. You know very well i do not like that! She softly yelled while proclaiming “You need to come home.”.

“Alright” I said with a well toned disappointment.

I got in the car, looked once more at the beauty of the lake then we rode off into the distance.

My mother is a very loving and kind person, but if you were to anger this loving woman. There would be a wrath of gods and goddesses. She would put the fear of God in me every time I’d wrong. I truly believe she raised me right. I had put her through a lot as a kid, and even now. She says she's proud of me and loves me very much every day!

I feel now that you have gotten to know me a little better, we can move on! Time for more pain and hardship. How fun!

You remember Sahra, right? She is one of the most loved friends I’ve never lost. She has been by my side through all of the hardships pertaining to me. A sister she has truly been. I would tell her everything. Didn’t matter what the details were. That's just the kind of person she was. I would thank her because of that reason every chance I had, to a very exhausting point. For her! I wanted to make sure she was aware of it.

We had just got out of a concert and were on our way home. The concert was an experience for sure, but not well planned out. And! The music sounded as if a group of tone deaf non talented people were trying to scare away any chance of success. That’s if they had any to begin with. She was driving in her vehicle and I was in the passenger side. We would have taken my vehicle. It’s a piece of green turd half floating in the water of the toilet, and mostly like a toaster oven. Well at least in the summer when it worked. That’s the reason I call it a toaster oven. Creative, right? Well during the drive Sahra and I were conversing about Candy.

“So I heard from a certain someone you like a female from your work.” She said with a simple smile.

“How’d you hear this?” I asked with a very worried confusion.

“I told you, someone told me!”

“Who? I want to know”

“No! But do you really?”

“Yes! I very much do!” I said with an aggravated, soft anger.

We went on with the subject, talking about how Candy and I laughed at the most simple things. Sahra asked me for details on who she seemed to be. I described Candy as a brown haired, brown eyed, bronzed skin, gold hearted angel.