Nox’s foot hooked on a tripwire, just as the labyrinth corridor opened onto the flat plain surrounding the Ziggurat. He stumbled, flailing forward. Perception of the world fuzzed, eyes blurring as radiant energy shot through the dungeon to form an outline that made his limbs spasm with traumatic memories. As if they were trying to hold themselves together, despite recalling the sensation of dismemberments.

Grass –flowing in a nonexistant wind– tricked his footing, causing his worn out sneakers to slip out from under him, sending him into a headlong tumble. Only to land softly on lush grass, reminiscent of a private golf course. If caddyshack was a vampire who watered the greens with freshly woodchippered-humans. Hundreds of grass blades pierced flesh, carving away Nox’s fingers, checks and throat. Not sparing a second. Nox glanced up at the minotaur, gaining a full half second to observe his nemesis before the boss crushed his skull under one hoof.

But that was a half second well spent. For Nox’s heightened senses found two exploits in that space. Scanning the bull he noted a dozen details, mind hyper-focused on victory. For that half second, Nox suppressed his terror with purpose, utterly consumed with finding a weakness. Ten victories would not occur accidentally, he needed to find a repeatable series of weapons and vulnerabilities to form a lagrange point of victory.

Examining the minotaur he noted the loincloth was concealing something –besides the obvious– in a pouch on its side. The minotaur’s legs were covered in old scars, rippling knots of scarred burns, gashes, and dotted scars marred his hide. Many heroes, hundreds maybe even thousands, had tried and failed to attack the beast’s legs. If they meant to cripple the minotaur it would take their best shot, and maybe more than one spear throw. Yet, the monster’s torso was no less hideous. Streaks of scars bulged across rippling abs. While white fur covered the legs, olive human skin sheathed potent abs, lower back, and arms. Skin that would have been flattering on a human being, if not for the bovine head.

Two horns extended from an absurd skull, bending forward roughly three feet along their shafts. Six foot horns were almost Nox’s height, but the Latissimus Dorsi muscles (lats) were what caught Nox’s eye. Bro-cow looks like a bodybuilder who just does pull ups all day– oh…

Time was up. The hoof fell, crashing through Nox’s skull with a delightful pop. Electrical impulses ran down the fragment of a spine he still had but amounted to nervous spasms. Then there was joyous silence and a lingering sensation of pain.

At least that death will be easy to re-live. Thought Nox, focusing on his enemy’s form as his older –less poignant– deaths began to repeat, starting with his cellular hellfire. Fire seared his soul, a quickly dulling penalty burn.

Lats, he had lats like Thor… The last time I saw lats like that was… When our first drill sergeant made us do pull ups every day for a month. Always said our character needed ‘uplifting’ and he couldn’t carry our dead weight. Man, that guy was a dick. Always going on about fictional workouts. Or maybe it was functional workouts…

Repeated exposure to pain tended to dull the sensation, but every cell in the body combusting could only be dulled to a point.

With one immolation completed Nox gained an instant of clarity before the next wave of hellfire. Where can you do a pull up in a labyrinth? It’s just polished marble walls with no roof. Drilling into marble would be a pain, you could hang something from the top, but the minotaur’s arms are trees! He’s tall enough to rest his knees on the floor… Oh… He is peeking over the walls. Or climbing over them! That- That two timing cheating heffer!

Nox’s thoughts were interrupted by his dismemberment. Though he bent that to his advantage, accepting the pain like a telescope accepted a focusing lens. No sense in letting a good death go to waste. That was when he saw it. Something so obvious he was stunned he hadn’t caught it before.

‘Oh, he can heal quite quickly. Do you really think that’ll be enough?’ Loki asked, his sarcastic tone indicating the being’s thoughts.

For the first time in their caustic relationship it was Nox’s turn to laugh. Howling with the sardonic euphoria of an atheist who witnessed god from their deathbed.

Biiiiiii–tch plllleeeeeaaaase. It’s more than enough. The last piece to our speedrunning puzzle. He’s not invulnerable. Just tough as a honeybadger and as regenerative as Wolverine.

Nox died laughing, and found himself cowering against the Labyrinth’s polished marble wall. They were back in the atrium, Ashley was sitting next to him. Her eyes full of concern for him. Four dead goblins lay around him and something absolutely reeked of ammonia. As if one of the monsters had pissed itself. Nox shot up. Brushing off his pants to realize they were wet, this is some bull-piss. Thought Nox, gagging on an echo of his death.

He flopped forward. Knees falling atop a dead goblin as he heaved. Dry heaving for a moment longer.

“I’ve activated.” Nox shouted, making the whole kill team jump in surprise.

“Everyone! Listen closely, your lives depend on it. Disobey and this A gate will kill you.” He continued, pausing to spit.

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“Who died and put a F ranked nobody like you in charge. You’re a therapy hunter!” Snapped Taylor.

Nox shrugged. “Not anymore.” He said, smiling wider than he had in his entire life. Or was it live(s) now? “The boss is an A ranked minotaur, he can ignore traps by climbing over labyrinth walls, hahaha! The ugly bullshitter cheats his own maze.” Laughed Nox.

Mary-sue gave him a concerned look, and flicked the safety off her short barreled kalashnikov.

“Genes won’t give you working knowledge of a dungeon… But a therapy overdose comes with euphoria.” She said.

“That’s rich coming from a diviner.” Said Nox, nonplused by her doubt. “But you’re right. So here is an olive branch, I’ll go above the Labyrinth’s walls. Oh don’t follow me, there are wyverns that will fly down here and kill you if they see light. The walls are tall enough to conceal glow stones, so you’re relatively safe.”

He unsheathed his XXL sharpie and walked into the maze, circling the trigger stone and moving past it to cut the first tripwire. Those who doubted his sudden outburst found their jaws hitting the floor as the weakingly disarmed two traps and returned in the space of a minute. Nox made a point of activating the pitfall trap and pulling the goblin’s spear out of its hands in one fluid motion. Trying not to laugh at Taylor’s open mouthed shock.

“There are traps placed every twenty two paces apart, take this,” Nox tossed his aluminum stick to Taylor, accidentally thwacking him in the nose with it. “You’ll need that to find the trigger stones and trip wires. Travel along the path I sharpie out, it’ll get us close to the central structure, it’s a stepped pyramid, but you won’t see that until later. Our path doesn’t lead directly to it, but we can reach it by demolishing a wall. If we’re quick, we can reach it before mana sickness sets in.” Nox opened his backpack and held out his hand to the one least likely to reject his sudden change.

“I need all the C4 you can give me.” He said, hand open in Jesus’ direction.

In that moment Jesus showed his true character, more than he had ever done so before. Without a word he opened his own pack and handed Nox every brick of C4 in his possession, along with detonators and remotes. Jamal swore, then complied, shaking his head all the while. Other’s handed Nox more explosives than he could carry, far more than he had received in his last life. Double the amount I need…

‘It’s not going to work.’ Loki whispered, earning him a sweet smile from Nox.

“Careful with tripwires, some of them make mana crystal geodes shoot down. Now, toss me up that wall.” Nox said.

“Guys, we aren’t really going to listen to the gene junky–” Asked Taylor.

“Shut your mouth.” Ordered Jesus. “We might all be drafted, but I’m counting on each of you to bring me home to my ninos. We’ve all had enough of your petty bullshit Taylor. I kept quiet til nowcause this was supposed to be an E-gate carry, but you need to lay off of Nox and figure out how to work together. This isn’t an E gate… But an A gate? Ah…” Jesus rubbed his temples. “Seems impossible, the Corps screws all kinds of pooches, but that’s mistaking the sun for a candle. I don’t know what happened to you Nox, but you’re not the same kid that entered this dungeon a minute ago. You get possessed by something?”

In Nox’s periphery he saw Jamal raising his spear. Ready to strike him down. Jesus and Jamal are veterans… They’ve probably seen beings like Loki before, and beaten them. Thought Nox, hoping this would not become his seventh death.

Closing his eyes, Nox prepared for the end. No. This is stupid. I’m not going to roll over and let them reset me! I just fucking arrived!

We’re allies, how can I convince them I came from the future… Ha, don’t tell them how I know, just tell them something that only they would know… What would Jesus do, to get out of this mess? The answer hit him like a ton of bricks, bringing one hand to chest height he snapped his fingers, startling the onlookers. There was a perfect speech that was practically begging to be said. Clearing his throat he repeated the words Jesus had orated in two previous lives, lowering his voice slightly to match the older hunter’s intonations.

“It’s been a hot minute since I killed a wyvern, but as I recall they were awkward on the ground.” He walked towards the nearest wall, and knocked on the edge with his knuckles. “Walls are solid enough, if any wyverns land they’ll be a rhino in the pantry, awkward, and hitting everything. We’ll have the advantage. Jamal’s got a talent for killing them, buff him with speed and anything armor piercing if those lizards show up. Hopefully we can avoid them because avoiding a fight is the same as winning the next fight.” Nox said, stroking his chin.

Nox paused for effect. Eyes tightly shut. Any second now Jamal might send a spear through him. And the only thing worth doubting was if Jamal would hit him in the head, or try and skewer him through the heart.

“Yooo Jesus, this kid has your digits clocked!” Jamal chuckled.

“How…?” Jesus began to say, knowing he had never given that speech in front of Nox before. There had never been wyverns in an E gate before, nothing even close.

Nox didn’t wait for a response, “I activated a foresight talent, uhm, I got no clue how it works, but you’ve given that speech several times now. Anyways… There are traps every twenty two paces, usually tripwires or pressure sensitive tiles, and then there is a tripwire at the ziggurat’s entrance, oh- you’ll be able to divine an upside down mana-waterfall with a pyramid in it. Start heading there. Now…” he gestured to Jamal and Jesus, since they were both C rankers they should be roughly equal in strength.

“Get your thumbs outta your bums!” He shouted.

“We got a minotaur to skin. On three, toss me onto the wall.”

“One,”

“Two,”

“Three!”

The two hunters obeyed, without understanding, and Nox thanked their flexible minds. Together they threw Nox with all their substantial might, launching him a full ten feet over the wall. Overshooting the target. He flailed maniacally, arms craning as he tried to flap his way back to the wall. But he didn’t stand a chance.

“Crap.” Said Nox.

He was more than halfway over the intravening corridor now, so he pivoted targets, twisting his spine to aim at what had been the distant wall. He angled his chest forward, just enough for his pecs to land squarely on the ninety degree marble edge. Air left him in a flurry of pain as ribs cracked from the sudden impact. Tears appeared in Nox’s eyes, he scrambled, hands clawing across flawless marble.

His left ring finger caught hold of the far edge as his chest sank below the wall’s edge. One finger straining against the weight of his entire body. A joint popped. Nox tried to scream, coughing for want of air and broken ribs. But his right hand found the near edge, halting his descent. He kicked off the wall, tearing holes in his sneakers to gain a few inches. It felt like he was freefalling, plummeting to his death. His sphincter tightened. For a split second he felt his momentum reach neutral, as the strength of his scrambling feet equaled the weight of gravity. Stomach shifting from the plummet of descent into neutral buoyancy, like he had fallen off a cliff and landed in a room temperature lake.

Then his left ring finger slipped free, he thrust his hand forward, catching the far edge with all four of his fingers. Inch by painful inch he clawed his way back onto the wall gasping for air. Ribs sending piercing agony through his chest with every breath.

‘Hahaha! Idiot… Do it again.’ Demanded Loki.

Ya know what, I don’t want to kill you, I hope you get a body. One riddled with mana cancer so you know how it feels to get magically shafted. Retorted Nox.