Three days had passed without seeing Sol again. Hanna only knew this from the nurse visits as she acclimated to her new schedule.

Hanna hadn’t woken back up in her fancy bed in the manor, nor had she woken up anywhere else aside from the stiff, spring twin mattress in the little green room. For a time, she had no idea if it was day or night. She couldn’t sleep again that first night, and she slept fitfully that second, but by the third she curled up into a ball and whispered to herself as quietly as she could, “I’m not crazy. I’m not crazy.”

Which, she figured, was exactly what a crazy person would say, but she had to remind herself somehow or she would go insane.

The nurse, that first morning, backed into the room pulling a silver cart with a cup of pills, a small plastic cup of foggy tap water, and a plate of breakfast food that looked left over from the day before. “I’m sorry, sugar,” she said with a tired sigh, “But they were all out of that oatmeal you like again. Looks like you’re stuck with scrambled eggs and sausage. Though I think it might be meatless. You never can tell.”

The woman’s voice was familiar, but off somehow. That is, until she turned around.

Nurse Aema! She should have expected it. And isn’t that exactly what a fever-dream would look like? The big-sister type, Aema, being in a caretaker position, their leader being some sort of doctor. It was cliché! Like every bad plot twist in a novel or theatre play, here it was. Hanna would have laughed if she hadn’t been sleep deprived, confused, and scared out of her mind. But she had to pretend this was normal. Didn’t she?

Nurse Aema turned out to be a lot like the Real Aema, only with that same off-quality as Sol when she spoke. Aema was a young woman, but this Aema talked like someone older. Whereas Fake Sol was very detached, this Aema was overly loving. It was as if certain aspects of their personalities were emphasized, while the others were left out completely. Hanna hadn’t seen a Fake Hanna, but she wondered if that wasn’t part of the ploy. There can only be one copy of a person at any given time.

Today, finally, she was allowed to leave her room. She was given a plain, slightly oversized, gray sweater and matching pants with white traction socks. She stepped slowly, feeling paranoid and deeply uncomfortable in the green and white halls.

“They don’t use the beige out here,” Nurse Aema was explaining, “Because people see it as being sort of dingy and dirty. We have to use stark whites out in the main areas, but with these washed-out yellowed lights, half of the time they look beige anyway, so I don’t know why we bother.”

Hanna’s mind wandered as she followed Nurse Aema to a commons area she called ‘the lounge’. She looked to her left as a door cracked open, a young girl’s face peering back at her. Legacy? The door slammed shut before she could form the words. The girl’s wild eyes haunted her.

Legacy was one of the newer ones in the Guild’s manor. She was young, but she would stand up straighter than anyone. She reminded Hanna a little bit of a pufferfish, how they poof up to seem bigger and more intimidating. Legacy was the youngest, being only fifteen, but she didn’t want to be looked down on or seen as a baby to the group. She wanted to be useful and to be seen as an equal—so, of course Hanna had to tease her.

She wondered if she would ever even have the chance to know the girl now, or if anyone else had ended up in this bizarro-world. Was it just her, she wondered.

As the hallway ended at the edge of an open commons area she stopped, hesitating as she tried to take in her new environment. To the immediate left was a hallway that led to two double doors, an electronic keypad beside it and ‘Staff only’ sign on the doors her only clues as to what lay beyond. Past that, also on the left, a desk was built in as a half-wall in the middle of a rounded alcove. Behind it, a day nurse was minding the desk while trying to keep herself busy with paperwork. Straight ahead, beyond the Nurse’s Station, was another hallway. It looked dimly lit and gave Hanna an icy chill up her spine. To her right was clearly the lounging area. The walls beyond were nearly floor to ceiling narrow strips of massive windows, showing a spring day beyond. There were small, four-person dining tables and chairs, activity areas for various crafts, and even a sitting area made up with sofas, like a small living room, a Television playing.

Wait, Hanna thought. A television? How do I know what that is? I’ve never seen this before!

But she did know. She knew what it was, suddenly remembered films, television shows, dramas and documentaries. A few horrors. It was as if an entire file of memories slid into place.

Nurse Aema stopped and turned towards her, a wary look of concern on her face. “Everything okay, hun? Don’t worry, they won’t bite. Maybe you don’t remember, but you’ve been in here before. It’s just been a while.”

Hanna looked around, uneasy. “You’ll take your lunch here and have some social time every day,” Nurse Aema continued. “But if you ever feel overwhelmed, you can ask one of the Nurses or orderlies on duty to bring you back to your room.” Nurse Aema gave her a gentle, reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. “You’ll do fine, love. I’ll be back to check in on you later. I have some other patients to tend to,” she said with a warm smile. “Just try to find something to keep your mind occupied. There’s games, painting, books—just about anything you could want to do.”

“Could I go outside?” Hanna asked, taking a gamble.

Nurse Aema hesitated, her smile momentarily wavering before coming back in full force. “Not today, sweetie,” she said gently, as though addressing a fragile child. “The verandas and gardens are closed right now for weather and maintenance reasons.”

Hanna looked past Nurse Aema’s shoulder to see blue skies and a few puffy wayward white clouds floating lazily in the clear day outside of the tall, large windows. Before she could open her mouth to question the weather, Nurse Aema gave her one more brief squeeze and turned on her heel, walking away.

Now alone, Hanna subconsciously wrapped her arms around herself. She looked over and saw the Nurse at the station, an irate-looking blonde woman, was staring at her, so she quickly walked toward the lounge area to the right. She walked to a table facing a windowless wall and sat down, back to the rest of the room, but a clear view of the sofa lounging area. She tried to form a game plan, but she just didn’t have enough information to go on. How did she get to see Fake Sol again? Did she even want to? Was there any way out of here? What would she do if they forced her to take medicine?

Hanna was careful not to look at any of the other patients sitting or wandering around as she had moved to sit, but she was jarred from her thoughts by the strong sense of someone approaching her. The hair rose on the back of her neck as icy fingers of dread ran up her spine. After a moment, a chair protested across the floor as it was pulled out at the table just left of her.

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Several tense moments passed, but Hanna did not risk a look. She pretended the wall was very interesting and hoped whoever it was would go away. When she finally decided to relax, a very quiet voice whispered softly. “Don’t turn around. Pretend you don’t know I’m here.”

Hanna had every intention of doing just that, even before he had spoken.

“Don’t try to run,” the young man’s voice said. “They punish you if you run. Stay obedient. Play the game. Don’t snoop too much, they’ll notice.”

It fell quiet and Hanna was about to turn towards the young man when she heard the light tap of feet and something clack onto the table.

“Here’s your lunch, Cris,” said a woman’s voice. “Try to eat everything today. The Doctor is very worried about your appetite. Drink this, it will help. It has lots of electrolytes and vitamins. When you’re all finished, do make sure you come to the Nurse’s Station and take your medication.” Though her words were kind, they were said tightly and felt insincere.

There was a tense moment of silence, then a quiet, “Okay. Thank you, Sasha.” The Nurse made an unpleasant sound of disapproval in her throat, but Hanna heard her heels turn and click-clack away.

Cris, Hanna thought, her mind spinning. They had a Cris in the manor. She wasn’t sure if she’d heard him speak, but before she could decide whether or not to take a look, she heard his voice again.

“Tomorrow, when they let you out here,” he said, “Go to the clay table. Sit with your back to the windows. Try to look like you’re making something, but watch everyone.”

Hanna wasn’t sure what to make of it, but he continued. “Remember that song? ‘One pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, but the pills that mother gives don’t do anything at all’? Only take those pills.”

She heard the chair screech lightly across the floor again as Cris rose, picked up his tray, and left. She waited several seconds, heard him dump his tray, and risked a look. He walked to the Nurse’s Station casually, but there was something almost primal in his gaze. It was like a animal, waiting to see if it is hunted, primed to fall into fight or flight. She locked eyes with the Nurse at the Station for a moment, then nearly jumped out of her skin as a hand clamped down on her shoulder.

Hanna whipped her head around to see an orderly’s uniform and a tray of lunch. “Here you go, Hanna. Welcome back to The Lounge. We’ve missed you,” the man said in an almost warm way, setting the tray down. As the tray clacked down onto the table, Hanna looked up and froze as she stared into the orderly’s face. It was none other than her previous Guild Leader.

Hanna stared up at her former Leader, dumbstruck, a feeling of irresolute horror rising up in her. But she didn’t have to endure it for more than a moment before another orderly called out, “Hey, a little help over here?” The orderly looked up. “Coming!” he called out, rising, but taking a moment to smile down at Hanna. “Be a good girl and we’ll see each other again,” he said cooly, giving her shoulder a last squeeze. “Don’t forget to take your medication,” he added, before moving to the other side of the room to help restrain an unruly patient.

Hanna wondered if she had just imagined that he had squeezed much harder than the first time as she rubbed her shoulder.

-

Lunch wasn’t a full-on disaster, but it wasn’t the best meal she’d ever had in her life. It tasted a lot like a premade dinner of cheap ingredients rather than something healthy or hearty. It’s like a frozen dinner, she thought as she poked at what seemed to be thin, overly dry slices of turkey in gravy. The potatoes tasted like dehydrated potato flakes, devoid of much flavor and in desperate need of butter. The accompanying peas were no better. She mostly pushed the food around on her plate, questioning if her former Leader would stoop to poisoning her food.

They hadn’t exactly parted on bad terms, but they weren’t favorable terms either. Hanna had helped build the Guild from the ground up as his Second, but she began to dislike the direction they began to take. In the end, rather than insist on changes, Hanna chose to leave quietly.

Since the members of each Guild lived within the manor presented to the Leader of each Guild, she no longer had a home—something she hadn’t thought about before quitting. By chance, she ran into Sol on the Market Road and, recalling that she had always said she wouldn’t refuse anyone as long as they weren’t ‘problem children,’ Hanna asked if she could find a home in the House of Aether.

She worried about bringing them down at first—saw herself as a potential ‘problem child’—but no matter the issue, Sol seemed to consider all sides, and she never seemed to punish Hanna for anything that Hanna herself had seen as wrong. Sometimes she wondered if she was too hard on herself or if Sol was too lenient, but she was relieved either way and chose not to overthink it too much, a problem she had often had.

Now, looking back, she was sure it was because she wasn’t sure if she deserved this new family who readily accepted her. After all the time spent talking and teasing and working alongside each other, nearly all of her doubts had long faded away.

Sighing the thoughts of the past away, Hanna stood and walked over to dump her tray as Cris had. A curiosity prickled at her brain as Legacy’s wild eyes returned to the forefront, and she decided she would casually pay her new neighbor a visit. As she turned to walk to the hall that led to her room, the front Nurse, Sasha, called to her.

“Excuse me, but you can’t return to your room without supervision. And it’s time for your medicine if you’re done eating,” she called out, seemingly annoyed at the inconvenience. Hanna hid her disgruntled sigh as a sneeze as she walked over to the desk. The woman glared her in the eyes before she picked up a paper cup with a few colored pills inside and set it down with a hard thunk. She slid it to Hanna then sat back and stared, her mouth tightening into a thin line.

With a nonplussed shrug and a smile, Hanna picked up the pill cup and turned to go back towards the hall. “Excuse me,” the Nurse said sharply, rapping on the desk with something. Hanna turned back, blinking. What could she possibly want, a tip? She thought. I took the pills.

“Those must be consumed here at the front desk,” the Nurse snapped, as though Hanna were feigning ignorance.

“Oh. Okay, sorry,” Hanna replied, coming back. Of course they would demand to watch, she thought with minor annoyance. Hanna waited at the desk while the Nurse stared into her, growing more and more impatient. “Well?” Nurse Sasha bristled, tapping a finger on the desk, the elongated nail tapping with a click click click.

“Um… Am I supposed to dry swallow them or something?” Hanna asked, legitimately confused. Nurse Sasha haughtily put a hand on her hip. “They’re capsulated tablets,” she said with a shake of her head, as though she were talking to the village idiot. “They’re designed to be easy to swallow.”

“But…with water, right?” Hanna pressed. Nurse Sasha rolled her eyes and, with a huff, turned to clomp over to the water cooler in the back of the little room. Hanna eyed the pills while she waited. What were they? What did they do? She suddenly remembered the strange thing Cris had said. One pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, but the ones that mother gives don’t do anything at all..

Who was ‘mother’? Was Nurse Sasha mother? As if she felt Hanna’s thoughts, she threw a sharp look over her shoulder. Okay, maybe not Nurse Sasha. She looked like she’d be happy to poison Hanna. As Nurse Sasha returned with the cup of water, it struck her. Aema! Nurse Aema must be mother! Who else here would be that much of a caretaker!

Unfortunately, as she took the water cup, she saw no way to get out of this mess. At least for today, she would have to take the pills. She made a show of putting them on her tongue and opening wide before she took a drink. Then she made a show of swallowing and showed the Nurse her empty tongue, setting the paper cups back on the desk with a hollow thunk.

“Aaah!” she said exaggeratedly. “They were magically delicious!” She grinned at the scowling Nurse. “Thank you, Sasha,” she said a wink. The Nurse simply narrowed her eyes, crushing the cups in her hand and giving a nod to a nearby orderly on Hanna’s left. To her relief, it was a complete stranger. He led her to a shared bathroom, waiting outside the stall, then to her room, giving Hanna no time to try to sneak to see Legacy. The door locked with a soft click when he pulled it shut, so she knew she couldn’t even sneak out. With a huff, she stretched out across her stiff bed. Legacy’s door clearly wasn’t locked. How long until they would trust her enough to leave hers unlocked? Closing her eyes, she let her thoughts carry her until, at the edge of sleep, she sprang up.

White Rabbit! Those things Cris was saying, they were lyrics to White Rabbit! She wasn’t sure how she knew this, or what it was, but a story about a girl named Alice came to her mind. She stared at herself in the reflective glass that spread across from her. If only getting back home were as easy as stepping through that glass.