One moment, Lia was talking with Rose in their base, and the next she was suddenly somewhere else, back in her humanoid form and wearing a relatively fancy dress. Fortunately, Rose had been teleported with her, though she was now wearing a dress made of leaves, so Lia wasn’t totally freaking out, she was just…mostly freaking out.
“Oh no.” A man to her side groaned. “This couldn’t have waited for one day? Why now?!”
Lia instinctively huddled up closer to Rose, already preparing a spell. Or…she would have been preparing a spell, but it eluded her grasp. It was…was like it had been when she had been alive the first time and didn’t have any shortcuts like she did now; anything picture she tried to make just…vanished before she even realized it.
“Don’t worry.” Rose said. “We’re safe. This is…well, a party outside of normal time, where a bunch of people from different universes are brought together. I’ve been a few times before, nothing can hurt us here, and when we leave, we’ll forget all about it. I know it’s a little overwhelming, but it’s probably best to sit back and just let it happen.”
“Are you sure?” Lia hissed. “That guy seems a little…upset.”
The man from before stopped muttering, then stood up and cleared his throat. “Sorry about that, this just came at an…inconvenient time for me. This whole thing would have been a lot easier to deal with had we been plucked out of our realm even one day later, but…now it is, I suppose. Anyway, the name’s Jeryl, but everyone calls me Jerry, so you can too. I’m the Administrator for your universe, the head god so to speak.”
“It’s nice to see you again, Jerry.” Rose said. “How have things been?”
“A little frantic, as you might imagine. How are your memories?”
“Aside from what occurred in the afterlife, crystal clear.” Rose said. “Though they definitely weren’t before we got here, so it’s probably something to do with the party.”
“Another weird thing I really wish I could study but won’t have the opportunity to.” Jerry sighed. “If I could just figure out how our memories are being tampered with, I could stop that from happening, and that would be a huge step towards peace in the factions, I think. I know a lot of people who are friends in this…place that aren’t otherwise, and it would be nice to…carry that over into real life.”
“Why haven’t you used the time during the party to check?” Rose suggested. “It’s better than nothing, right?”
“I tried.” Jerry said. “Every time I do, I just get whisked away by something that I can’t get out of. It’s kind of frustrating, but I’ve become pretty sure that I’m not going to make any progress until the entity that governs this party wants me to.”
“So…you think someone’s responsible for this?” Rose asked, gesturing at the large room they were in.
“Maybe.” Jerry said. “At the very least, some force is doing this, and I doubt it’s one any of us are familiar with in real life. As far as I can tell, complete and utter memory erasure and restoration to this many Administrators and Higher Beings should take more Worship than anyone has ever seen, and this thing seems to happen at least once a year. I–”
Jerry was cut off by a trolley bumping into his knees. Lia was positive the trolley hadn’t been there moments ago, but it was there now, and Jerry was looking distinctly unhappy about it. “Fine, fine.” He grumbled. “The party wants us to get on with the partying and stop questioning its existence. That means we need to figure out where you two need to be, and I’m not sure where to start with that.”
Suddenly, Lia got a nagging feeling in her gut, one that was telling her to head to her right. Rose seemed to get it too, because she pointed in the area the feeling was directing them to. “That gut feeling says over there is the way.” Rose said.
“Yeah, I’m getting it too.” He began to herd Lia and Rose in that direction, and soon they encountered a group of people. There was what looked to be a slime woman, a pair of succubi, one oddly-imposing angel-demon hybrid, an unreasonably beautiful blonde human woman, and a redheaded human woman.
“Take these two, too!” Jerry said, bursting into their conversation. “Sorry, but I really don’t know what to do with them, and that weird gut feeling is telling me this is the place!” He practically pushed Lia and Rose into their midst. “Oh, and it’s roughly year thirty-two forty-five Amy time for me.”
“Um…hi?” The blonde ventured. “And…weird gut feeling?”
“It happens from time to time at these events.” Rose said. “You get a feeling like someone needs to be somewhere and it won’t go away until you bring them there. Anyway, my name is Rose, and this is Lia, my Queen.”
“Right, well, we’ll leave the five of you to it.” The slime woman said. “Feel free to wander around, you’re as safe as can be. No one’s able to hurt each other here.”
“And yes, conversion counts as harmful in this context.” Jerry said. “Not that you’d be able to get away with it, you two are probably the weakest people in this little group.”
Rose gave the other three a thoughtful look. “I suppose I am a fair bit weaker than I was the last time I was at one of these things.”
“To be quite honest, you don’t beat out Lilith even at the height of your old power. She is, for all intents and purposes, on the same level as the gods.” Jerry replied. “And Tess and Ellie, the blonde and redhead, are pretty close to the gods too, plus Amy’s planes are generally stronger, so–”
“Let them make their own introductions.” The slime woman interrupted. “We’ll just be stifling their conversation.”
“Alright, alright.” He said. “But, seriously, behave yourselves.”
“We will, don’t worry.” Rose assured.
“Good, thank you.” He replied, nodding his head. And with that, all the other people walked away, leaving the group alone.
There was silence for a moment, then Ellie spoke up. “So…you’re on the same level as the gods? What does that mean?”
“Yeah, I guess?” Lilith replied, scratching the back of her neck. “We’re the same category of being. How much do you know about Administrators?”
“Enough.” Ellie said. “They’re like a step above the gods, right?”
“What’s an Administrator?” Lia asked. “I…sorry, this is all a little overwhelming.”
“Oh.” Lilith replied. “Um…I don’t know if we should talk about this in front of you, then. Um…”
“It’ll be fine.” Rose said. “She won’t remember a thing when this is over. At least I didn’t the three or four times I’ve been to one of these.”
“Right. Then, I’m what’s called a Higher Being, they’re what most gods are. Lords of Monsters, too, if the planes you guys are from use those.”
“What?!” Lia said, flinching back as terror began to grip her. She was going to be the one dealing with that, albeit with Amelia’s help, but that knowledge made things far scarier than they had been. “The Lord of Monsters is a god?! How are we supposed to…”
Rose laid a hand on her shoulder. “It’ll be fine. I’m sure there’s more to it than that, or else no Lord of Monsters would ever be defeated.”
Lilith shrugged. “Power levels vary. To my knowledge, most Lords of Monsters only get abilities that relate to monsters. Or, at least, I did.”
Lia’s eyes widened in shock. “You’re a Lord of Monsters?! But you’re not…omnicidal!”
“It’s a side job. I’m pulling double duty for my world.” She turned back to Tess and Ellie. “Speaking of, Amara mentioned that you’re from a plane without magic like me?”
“Huh?” Tess said. “I mean, yeah. We were just introduced to it like…half a year ago.”
“It can get pretty overwhelming at times, right?” Lilith said. “I felt the same way sometimes. You get used to things after a while, so don’t stress it.”
“Yeah, I think we’re getting there.” Ellie said. “So…does your world just have angels and demons or is it more…cosmopolitan?”
“When I was born, just humans, at least as far as people who didn’t know about magic. There are a bunch of other species too, but not nearly as many as there are humans. And, yes, I used to be human. I was just your regular human dude and then I got turned into…this. It’s like…well, I doubt your planes have a similar concept, but I’m every species in existence at the same time, which means I’m a lot stronger than the average person, since I get every single species-specific ability.”
“Wait, you used to be a guy too?” Tess said, taken aback. “That’s crazy, so was I!”
“And I.” Rose said. “I suppose we have more in common than it seems.”
“Alright, are the rest of you really not freaking out or are you just good at not showing it?” Lia blurted out, brain finally catching up to the conversation. “This is weird, right?”
“I’ve seen a lot of weird in my time.” Lilith said. “I’m numb to it.”
“Same.” Tess said. “This is only barely in the top three.”
“Yeah, what she said.” Ellie added. “I’m just sorta dealing by pretending it’s not weird.”
“And I’ve been here before.” Rose said. “The novelty wears off by the second or third time.”
“So, as the one who’s been here before, what do we do?” Ellie asked. “Do we just stand around talking or what?”
“I suppose we begin by eating some food, then proceed to activities afterwards.” Rose mused. “Let’s talk more over dinner, okay?”
“I’ll go find a table.” Lilith volunteered. “Uh, let me see if I can…” She paused for a moment, and then a nearly-identical copy of her appeared beside her. “Sick. Alright, I’m gonna get us a table, then I’ll send this one to go dish up. So, if you find me and I’m not responding, it’s because my consciousness is in this spare body, not because I’m being rude.”
She smirked, then walked off to find a table, leaving the double standing lifelessly in front of them. “Um…I guess we should go dish up, then?” Lia ventured.
“Yeah, um…sounds like a plan.” Ellie replied. “We’ll catch you at the table, I guess.” She gently pulled Tess away from the group, leaving Rose and Lia to go find food themselves.
“Are you doing alright?” Rose asked as they picked through the tables. “You seem…overwhelmed.”
“I am, a bit.” Lia said. “That Lilith seems to literally be a god, those other two are apparently close, and that Jerry is apparently head of the gods? It’s just…freaking me out, that’s all.”
If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
“I wouldn’t worry about that so much.” Rose said. “Believe it or not, gods are people too, and when we’re in this place, everyone is about as equal as it gets. I actually was here with some of our gods a few times, and they’re just like you and me. It was weird at first, but you’ll get used to it, trust me.”
“I don’t know…” Lia said warily, piling some food onto her tray. “I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to this, it’s…weird.”
Rose chuckled. “You will.” She said firmly. “It’s hard to stay properly in awe of someone when you catch them picking their nose when they think no one’s looking.”
“That didn’t actually happen, right?” Lia said incredulously.
“Sure did.” Rose replied. “God of…Nature, I think it was. Completely killed any of that fear and awe I was feeling.”
They chatted for a bit more before they finished dishing up, and began to look for a table. After only a moment Rose pointed out a table that had Lilith’s motionless body sitting at it, and they sat down.
“You in there?” Rose asked, poking the body curiously. When she got no response, she began to inspect the body more thoroughly. “Fascinating.” She said. “It’s definitely still alive, but it’s just like…nobody’s home. It’s weird that it hasn’t gone all limp, too, so I can’t help but wonder what sort of magic she used to make this.”
“Probably a god thing. But you should probably stop messing with it, I’m pretty sure she’ll notice.” Lia whispered. “And I don’t want her getting angry.”
“Fair enough.” Rose said, turning her attention back to her food. It only took about a minute for the real Lilith to find her way over to the table, where she placed her tray in front of the empty body. The body suddenly began to move, and then the body that had delivered the food just…vanished, leaving only the one body. “So, what do you two do?” Lilith asked. “I believe Rose mentioned Lia is a queen of some sort?”
“Oh, um, yeah.” Lia said, looking away and praying that Lilith didn’t notice that Rose had touched her body. “I um, am the leader of this swarm thing, I’m…well, to be blunt, I’m working on taking over the world. Not because I’m like…a bad guy, it just sort of…was thrust upon me.”
“Oh, I’ve heard about you!” Lilith said. “You’re like, half monster, right?”
Lia blinked in surprise. She had not expected the god of an entirely different universe to know about her. “I…am. You heard about me? From where?”
“I’m from a few years in your future, and I had a chat with Jerry. He mentioned you in it, and was very excited about Blood Money, for reasons I don’t think either of you will fully understand yet. Anyway, due to that whole ‘every species at once’ thing, I’m also part monster. Or…full monster. It’s complicated, I’m basically full everything, and no, it doesn’t really make a lot of sense. but it works, so I don’t question it.”
“So, we’re still alive in your time, then?” Rose asked.
“I’m…pretty sure? I mean, I haven’t heard anything about you, but from the sound of things Lia was alive, at least? I didn’t dig into things too much.”
“Did he tell you anything else about us or what’s happening in our world?” Lia pressed, desperate to know anything she could use to prepare for the future. “Anything at all?”
Lilith paused. “A bit, but apparently talking about the future is taboo during these things.”
Before Lia could formulate a response, Ellie and Tess showed up at the table and sat down. “Ah, you two, I’ve been meaning to ask, what do you do?” Lilith asked. “Like, as jobs. You seem to be teenagers, so are you in school or…?”
“We just graduated high school.” Ellie replied. “And we’re training as freelancers, sort of…explorers slash hunters slash odd job doers. Then we’re also acting as messengers of the gods, enacting their will, that sort of thing. What about you?”
Lilith shrugged. “To tell you the truth, most days it’s nothing but training. I’m functioning as sort of…the icon of justice, so to speak. I step in when it looks like people are going to commit genocide or if the magical community looks like they’re about to subjugate people who are way weaker than them. But, by and large, I’m just there as a threat to keep people in line.”
“Been there, done that.” Rose sighed. “I don’t envy you for your position.”
“It’s not that bad.” Lilith said. “I get to hang around with my girlfriends and my family, and I don’t want for anything, so I’m content.”
“But what about meeting new people and going out to see places?” Rose asked. “You can’t do that anymore, right?”
“No, I can.” Lilith replied. “I just use a separate body or magic and no one is the wiser.”
“Oh.” Rose said. “I…really wish I could have done that.” There was silent for a moment, then Rose shook her head. “But that’s in the past. Let’s talk about something more pleasant, okay?”
They made more small talk while they ate, and eventually they finished, and began to drift towards the activities.
“So…what do they have to do here?” Tess asked. “I can’t really…see over all these people.”
“I believe it is entirely dependent on who is looking.” Rose said. “We should find a variety of activities that we are familiar with. They’ll just…appear when we look.”
Ellie and Tess shared a look. “Are any of you familiar with laser tag?” Ellie asked. “It’s Tess and I’s favorite activity, but we, uh, haven’t been able to have a fair game in a while.”
“I’m familiar.” Lilith said. “Provided it works similarly to how it does on my world. Though…I’m not sure how fair the game will end up being, especially if we go all out.”
“Oh, don’t worry, we’d make sure Tess doesn’t use any of the real cheat-y stuff, but we just want to do it with people who are…you know, actually used to being on a battlefield and have experience.”
“I don’t believe it was Tess she was worried about.” Rose said, raising an eyebrow. “She is a god, after all.”
“Gods don’t have any intrinsic advantages in this sort of thing.” Ellie said matter-of-factly. “While Tess has the advantage of being able to use all sorts of additional senses that normal people don’t get access to.”
“I’m not a god.” Lilith said. “Not technically. But she is right, Higher Beings don’t automatically get better at this sort of thing just because we’re Higher Beings. That being said, you weren’t here when I explained, but my species thing includes monsters. I have access to every monster and species-specific benefit at the same time. So, I also have those senses, and probably more. Though, hypothetically speaking, I might not have access to the kind of stuff you’re referring to, due to differences in monsters and abilities between planes.”
“Does it even matter if you’re not going to use them?” Lia asked quietly. “Just the basic five should be fine, right?”
“She’s right.” Lilith said. “How are we splitting up the teams? Tess and Ellie on one and the rest of us on the other? You two are probably the most experienced so that seems the fairest.”
“How do you play?” Rose asked.
“It’s easy.” Ellie said. “You ever used a gun before?”
“No?” Rose asked, tilting her head. “What’s a gun?”
Lia vaguely remembered learning about them in school. They weren’t exactly a popular weapon, since they required so much maintenance, but they apparently packed a punch. “It’s kind of like a handheld cannon.” She explained. “It’s this long tube that you like…pack with some sort of powder and then it explodes and fires a projectile at something.”
“Oh.” Rose replied. “I have used a crossbow before, if that helps?”
“Yeah, that’s good enough.” Ellie said. “In my world, guns are a lot simpler than all that, you just load in the bullet and press the trigger, no need to pack the powder yourself or anything. Laser tag guns are even simpler, you just press a button on the side of the gun to reload, and then you point it at your opponent and shoot. Everyone wears these vest things, and they light up when you get hit.”
“Depending on the arena there are also other things you can shoot.” Tess added. “Like pillars and stuff. They each give different amounts of points, and whichever team has the most points at the end of the game wins.” She turned to Lilith. “Have you used a gun before?”
“Guns are my main weapon, to tell you the truth.” She admitted. “But I don’t have my…well, long story short, I don’t have my aim assist with me, so I’ll be a little worse than I usually am.”
“Aim assist?” Ellie asked.
“Alternate consciousness with a biological supercomputer built into my body.” Lilith said. “Again, long story. But, yes, I use guns extensively.”
“And there’s the laser tag, I think.” Rose said, pointing towards the back of the room. “Shall we?”
The group made their way over, and suddenly found themselves teleported to a different space entirely. Their clothes had changed, too, from formal wear to nondescript clothes that were easy to move around in, vests and guns already in place. “Please wait a moment while teams are selected.” An odd, monotone voice said. “Teams selected. Please remain silent while the rules are read.”
Lilith and Rose’s vests had begun glowing orange, while the other vests glowed blue. “This is a ten minute experience with the aim of obtaining the most points possible.” The voice said. “Points are obtained by shooting your opponents or their home base, a large pillar on their side of the field. Pillar shots are worth five hundred points, while shots on an opponent are worth one hundred.
“While running, jumping, climbing, flying, and other such activities are actively encouraged, purposeful physical contact with the other team is discouraged, and will result in a fine of one thousand points. To ensure fairness, your statistics will be evened out, your senses tuned to the same degree, and any active abilities, or passive abilities that may negatively affect the game, will be disabled. If you wish to play without this tuning, you may choose to do so after this game. You will be transported to your side of the field in three…two…one…”
And then Lia found herself in a dim room with Tess and Ellie. Once her eyes adjusted, she was able to make out a lot of sleek black shapes, forming a labyrinth of stairs, walls, and low cover.
“Alright, so, I’ll take left, Tess, you take right, and Lia, you handle the middle.” Ellie instructed. “We have numbers on our side, so we can afford to have one person just camp their base while the others run interference.”
“Camp their base?” Lia asked, tilting her head in confusion at the unfamiliar terminology.
“Doing nothing but sitting there and shooting the base until someone interrupts them.” Tess translated.
“Oh. Can I do that? I feel like it’ll be easier to get used to the gun that way.” Lia said. It would give her some time to figure the gun out, too, and she wouldn’t be under too much pressure to…well, do much.
“Sure.” Ellie said. “Just find yourself a decent hiding place and blast away.”
“The other team will be given a substantial point boost for having fewer players.” That odd monotone voice suddenly said. “Game begins in five…four…three…two…one…” A horn blared, and the area around them lit up.
Or, rather, the walls, floor, and various bits of cover began glowing with an otherworldly light, not bright enough to do anything more than provide an indication of the arena’s general shape and where you were walking. It was almost entrancing, with all the different colors and patterns, and Lia found herself transfixed for a few moments before remembering where she was.
She immediately began to pick her way through the center of the arena, fiddling with her gun all the while. A trigger near the bottom seemed to set it off, judging by the noise it made, and a button on the side refreshed the “ammo” on the glowing screen near the handle.
After a little difficulty, she found the opponents’ base, and began shooting the glowing part at the top. She wasn’t interrupted for a couple of minutes, at which point one of the other team, Lilith, if the wings were any indicator, found her and shot her a few times.
Her vest made an odd noise, and Lia nearly jumped from the shock, scurrying back behind cover before running back into the maze of walls, trying to lose her attacker. She was, eventually, successful, and once she was sure she was safe, she returned to the opponents’ base via a different route, and recommenced her assault.
This cycle repeated a few times until the game ended, at which point she and everyone else was teleported back to the lobby. To her surprise, they actually won; it was close, yes, but she had been sure that the point boost, Lilith’s experience, and Rose’s…being Rose would allow the two to easily surpass Lia’s own team.
They ended up playing a couple more games with different team compositions, and all agreed there was too much variance in their abilities to try playing a game without the built-in limiters. So, once they decided to leave, they found themselves teleported back to the main room, back in the party wear they had been in before.
“Where to next?” Lilith asked.
“We did our thing, do you guys have any ideas?” Tess asked.
“I’m partial to miniature golf myself.” Lilith said.
Lilith, seemingly not noticing Tess’s surprise, turned to Lia and Rose. “What about you two?”
“I…don’t have much experience with recreation.” Rose admitted.
“Where I’m from, we don’t have anything as complex as what we just played, but…I play cards a lot, I guess?” Lia said. “I’d like to try whatever this miniature golf is, though.” The laser tag had been surprisingly fun, and, after a game or two with Lilith on her team, had finally begun to relax around her.
She was a lot nicer than her domineering figure and godhood would suggest, and Lia couldn’t help but be curious about this otherworldly game Lilith was apparently fond of.
So, the evening progressed, and they went from activity to activity until, eventually, they all simultaneously got the feeling that it was time to go. “Well, it was fun hanging out with you guys.” Lilith said. “Hopefully I’ll see you around at one of these, or perhaps even in real life.”
“Yeah.” Lia said. “As long as it’s not because you’re coming to invade my world or anything. I don’t think I could handle that.”
“I wouldn’t worry about that.” Lilith laughed. My world is on very good terms with your world. Even if we weren’t, my world isn’t in any place to be invading other worlds. You shouldn’t have to worry about any of that stuff until you’ve conquered your world at the very earliest.”
“Well…that is good to hear.” Lia said. “Hopefully, sometime in the future, we can meet in real life, then. I’m sure the five of us would get along just as well.” If they were on good terms, then…well, hopefully Lia’s status as “someone Lilith had heard of” would allow them to get reacquainted with one another. If not for friendship, then as allies; a god and two people who were “close to gods” would surely be good people to have in her corner.
“Perhaps.” Ellie said. “It all depends on circumstance, I guess.”
“Oh, you two will almost certainly be meeting Lilith at some point.” Kali said, eyes twinkling as she stepped up. “But not for quite a while. She hasn’t even been born in your time.”
“Wait, really?” Tess asked, blinking in surprise. “You just seemed older than us, so I assumed…”
“No, I’m five or six years older than you right now, but I’m also from fifty or so years in your future, apparently.” Lilith replied. “Though, I guess…things do get a little fuzzy, but that’s neither here nor there. I’ll see you all when I see you, I guess.”
“Thanks again for taking care of Maven!” Kali said cheerfully, giving them a wave. And then they were just…gone.
“Time’s up, you two!” Jerry said, running up to them. “They didn’t bother you too much, right?”
“They were fun to be around.” Ellie said. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Good.” Jerry said. With that, they blinked back to their home, none the wiser about what had just taken place.