The best businesses are effortless, rewarding, and crazy. This one is no exception. ENJOY!
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“Squirrels! Fresh Squirrels!”
As Jack shouted, many crazily rushed forth.
At this moment, the entrance to Legendary-U would have made countless question their sanity. What would usually be a welcoming lobby had been turned into a small market?!
And amidst the confusion, a certain duo really stood out…
“Hehe, Jack, how many did you sell so far? 15 or so?! At this rate, you’ll have to open a pet shop! What should we call it, eh? Furry Paradise! Or maybe We Like ‘Em Hairy!”
“Sharky, I can assure you that WOULD not help to sell squirrels.”
“Think so? I’d definitely check those out.”
“I bet— and we’re out of stock!”
By the time they had finished their short conversation, they had already sold their last squirrel, and it was the same for pretty much every seller around, their signs changing.
OUT OF STOCK!
OUT OF STOCK!
OUT OF STOCK!
….
Jack couldn’t help but grumble.
‘This is too long and way too inefficient…’
Those squirrels were free credits, but the back and forth was getting really annoying. Besides, they still had issues with the other classes, and those wouldn’t solve themselves.
1. Passing the test for the Language Class
2. Finding a way to join the Runic One
3. Worst case, find an alternative
…
His future was far more important than some short-term gain. But what if he just happened to solve both problems with a bang? With a confident smile, he turned to his best friend.
“Sharky, let’s do one last run. Get ready to move.”
“One? We can afford to do a couple more.”
“Hehe, not if we go BIG!”
As Jack saw Sharky's slight tremble, he couldn’t help but laugh. Seems his friend had understood the scope he was aiming for. He'd make this VERY memorable!
“Say, Sharky, Valor cars still have camping kits, right?”
“ALWAYS! But why would we need it here?”
He’d know very soon…
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The plan was simple.
First, a squirrel with Stockholm Syndrome!
Jack simply sat it down and told it as straight as humanly possible.
“Look, you’re the one that followed me. I could have let you be devoured MANY times. I could have kicked you to the curb, too. You can do this little thing for me, can’t you?”
His voice was akin to a dark promise, gently urging. Yet, the cute squirrel still had reservations as it held its tiny head. What Jack was asking for was quite insane!
Yet, that didn’t last long as he gave the BEST argument.
“Or, I can unlock my shadow and—”
"Chii-chii! Trrii-trrii!”
It bloody ran.
Jack’s shadow t̶e̶r̶r̶i̶f̶i̶e̶d̶ inspired it, granting it the courage to brave the outside world, soon facing a crazed battlefield with Supers hunting Squirrels seemingly to extinction!
It was more than insane. Squirrels were running for their lives as Quirks were being wantonly thrown at them, the poor creatures scaling trees and buildings to save themselves!
Yet, many were already screwed. Arcane walls blocked them, anti-gravity magic made them float, lightning nets restrained them, and flying rocks were even thrown at them!
Watching it all, Jack’s squirrel squeaked in pure terror. Then again, that terror was justified, for it was quickly noticed. It had barely taken a few tiny steps when…
“SQUIRREL! Get it! Catch that nut muncher!”
“You take the left. I’ll take the right!”
“Grab it by the— Fuck, it’s HIS!”
…
As the critter scaled Jack’s left leg to safety, many students spat out in dejection. Just when they thought they had one, turns out it already belonged to someone?!
Yet, an instant later, their eyeballs almost fell off….
Jack and Sharky came out swinging, but they were FAR different from the other students. Their version of hunting looked incredibly strange. They happened to have WAY too much gear.
→ A tiny portable stove
→ A comfy-looking camping sofa
→ A fancy-looking cooler with lemonades
→ A crazy folding stand that matched their drinks!
…..
They had everything to go hunting, start a lemonade stand, and perhaps even a permanent house right here and there! Many couldn't help but wonder what those two idiots were doing.
Yet, they sighed at the bystanders…
“What? Never seen two friends hunt together? This is how men bond! Talking, hunting, and drinking lemonade! If you guys don’t like it, please leave. We won’t disturb you either!”
They shrugged off the weird looks and resumed building their base…
In a matter of minutes, they had a small encampment set up that looked WAY too relaxed and comfortable for the atmosphere.
Yet, even as Quirks flew all over, they didn’t mind one bit. Even as a lightning strike went straight at their face, they didn’t move; they simply stood there making toasts?!
“Here’s to you, brother. May we prosper and live long lives!”
“And may we forge eternal legacies that remain far after we’re gone!”
Then the magic finally reached them, and— BZZZTT! A blue Mana field suddenly appeared and completely blocked it, the two cheering once again, taking yet another sip.
“Here’s to the Valor camping gear. May it never fail us!”
“Here’s to the opportunity to use it at school!”
“Let us drink and relish this moment!” X2
Two best friends enjoyed themselves in the middle of a Super VS Squirrel Apocalypse, their drinks feeling even sweeter as they watched Supers bicker all over the battlefield.
“Idiot. I had it trapped, and you freed it!”
“I saw it first. I even called dibs!”
“Think that means anything?!”
….
It was madness!
Yet, amidst that madness, there was peace.
Operation “Just Chilling” was in full swing, and all they had done so far was set up a camp. But, just as it seemed they’d remain undisturbed, IT happened!
“Come back here, you little—!”
Chased by a student, a Squirrel rushed their way. It was so tiny, so cute, and so dumb! The student chasing it couldn’t help but rejoice. It would hit the Mana wall and bounce back!
“Go on! Keep going. At the speed you’re running, you’ll knock yourself right out!”
The squirrel quickly reached the barrier and— WHOOSH!
“Wait, it passed through instead?!”
Surprised, the man gave chase, only to collide with a Mana Barrier. And it was at that moment that the people finally understood what the two were doing here.
Chilling? God no! They had clearly set their barrier to allow squirrels in, but not humans! This was pretty much a safe zone for the little critters!
“You guys! Stop messing around and let me in!”
“Yeah, I don’t think we will actually.”
“We’re quite busy, you see.”
“….”
As a student outside raged on, a certain Stockholm Syndromed Squirrel was doing its job properly. It welcomed its brethren with open paws, gently soothing it.
The new arrival sniffled cutely, finally feeling safe after so long. As for the two humans who hadn’t turned mad? At that moment, it thanked its luck. Finally!
Poor thing, if only it knew…
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Jack happily drank.
Even now, he didn’t even bother hunting. Why would he go after the critters when they could come to him instead? Grinning, he glanced at their encampment.
There were 12 squirrels happily chilling.
There were 3 times as many students angrily glaring.
There were 5 times that many humans heavily cursing them.
…
There wasn’t anything more painful than to chase a squirrel for five straight minutes just for it to enter a camping encampment out of reach but VERY much in sight.
Yet, even that wouldn’t discourage the hunters. They just learned to avoid the area altogether and to make sure they drove the squirrels away from it as much as possible.
Then again, even the insults were bound to stop as Jack sharply retorted them…
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“You bastards! Come out and face us like men!”
“So, not like squirrels?”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
You bunch of scaredy cats hiding behind your fancy barrier!”
“Very fancy! It even glows!”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“Just wait till I get my hands on you; I’ll beat you both black and blue!”
“Wait? We can wait for sure.”
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
Yes, they could wait some more, but they wouldn’t. Seeing as they had enough squirrels in their encampment, Jack gave his squirrel in crime the craziest order.
“It’s time. Do it. Bring them all. Don’t leave ANY!”
A second later, it began. Jack’s squirrel called out to its terrified brethren. It was a loud, sharp, and clear cry, one that meant “SAFETY” and “FOOD”!
And in their panic, the squirrels answered the call!
Squirrels rushing to the encampment
Squirrels rushing to the encampment
Squirrels rushing to the encampment
…
It was a world-view-shattering scene!
All along, many had been hunting them with all their might, only to fail, and then a second later, they were literally throwing themselves at the duo just chilling there?!
The squirrels could see it, even from a distance.
There were so many of them safe, and they looked so happy! Between the scritches and the nuts that Sharky kept throwing them, it looked like Paradise! They couldn’t wait!
This glowing vision and their brethren’s sharp call made it a no-brainer. They ALL rushed forth for what would be the greatest Squirrel exodus EVER!
And Jack didn’t refuse a single one…
He simply sat there enjoying himself as endless squirrels dove in, the bystanders watching with their jaws hanging so low they seemed about to dislodge, the moment ruined by jealousy.
“Who the hell is that?! Take a number, buddy!”
“He just comes along and steals them all?!”
“Don’t tell me he’s an activist?!”
…
Countless held their breath.
If he didn’t want to share the squirrels, then what could they do?! Should they attack that barrier? Technically, he wasn’t doing anything too wrong, just camping.
Also, why wasn’t the squirrel flow actually stopping?! Wait, even the ones in hiding were coming out?! No wonder they had been so hard to hunt!
“C’mon, we just have to intercept them!”
“Let’s make a wall and block them!”
“They won’t pass, for sure!”
…
Many students could be seen trying to intercept the squirrels before they reached safety, but most failed, which wasn’t too surprising considering the critters were FAST!
They more than made up for what they lacked in power in nimbleness! They bypassed the defenders, many taunting the laters from the “safety” of the encampment.
That was simply adding oil to the fire!
As for the glares that followed, they were VERY telling. Some considered snitching to the teachers, but most were thinking about taking matters into their own hands instead.
At any moment, Jack would become their target— and it would soon be Game Over.
A single barrier would eventually falter, and it wasn’t like his shadow or the wolves it contained could protect him from Quirks once it did.
After all, even mere air was enough to defeat his summons right now!
Oh, and the air was ESPECIALLY tense!
There were already bets in the background on how long it would take to break the barrier and how long the duo would spend in the hospital. Definitely more than a week!
But as Jack faced them all, he actually grinned…
“Selling Squirrels! Get yours now!”
“Selling Squirrels! Get yours now!”
“Selling Squirrels! Get yours now!”
….
His call shattered the tension.
What?! He’d actually sell them?! Compared to fighting and getting in trouble, this would be easier for sure. Then again, what if he asked for an obscene price? What if—
"Reserve your spot for Beast Taming! Now only 30 Credits!"
"Learn to raise the strongest beast— or the cutest!"
"For 30 Credits, you might just find love!"
That’s when everything changed.
Motherfucker! 30 Credits was dirt cheap! Hell, some dumbasses in the school were selling them for 100 Credits already! This guy was a saint in comparison!
And it was at that precise moment that the squirrels realized they had fucked up. Selling them?! What about the safe haven they had been promised?! They squeaked in anger!
That traitorous furry bastard!
First, they’d run away, then plot revenge— or at least that was the initial plan. The encampment they crowded just happened to be in a certain youngster’s shadow!
Jack loosened the LOCK…
FRIENDS! FRIENDS! FRIENDS!
FRIENDS! FRIENDS! FRIENDS!
FRIENDS! FRIENDS! FRIENDS!
….
The Ink Wolves’ aura spread like wildfire!
Yet, it also remained inside the shadow itself?! Was it because this world was rejecting their very existence? Either way, the poor squirrels sensed it ALL!
They felt themselves watched by playful but monstrous eldritch creatures, and then they understood. A single word from the crazy human, and it would be hunting season!
Ink Wolves VS Squirrels? All they saw was DEATH!
And that’s when they truly understood…
It wasn’t that the traitorous squirrel had schemed against them. It simply didn’t dare to stand against the human in the first place, the anger in their eyes turning to despair.
But just as they were hitting rock bottom, Jack’s voice echoed in their tiny ears…
“Pftt— Don’t worry. It's for a class meant to take care of you. Food, exercise, snacks, you’ll get it all! Enough with the melodrama already, alright? I promise you’ll be fine.”
They weren’t sure what he was talking about, but they understood one thing. As long as they behaved, no harm would come to them. With this, they stopped resisting.
As they turned as obedient as kittens, the school stirred.
“Am I crazy, or did they just agree to be sold?!”
“Their eyes glowed red with fury, but now…”
“They’re just chilling in the back?!”
“HE HAS TO BE A DRUID!!!”
…
But while some were commenting, Jack was already serving customers again. The first was a valiant-looking boy who decisively transferred 30 Credits over, receiving his squirrel.
Sadly, he had committed a very grave mistake: he lacked a cage!
Everyone watched with rapt attention. Wouldn’t it just run?
It was about to, but as it saw Jack, it changed its mind.
…
This crazy-powerful human was strange. Low key? Friendly? And it had even promised its safety when he really didn’t have to? In that instant, the squirrel actually believed.
Instead of running, it turned a curious glance toward the human it had just been sold to, the latter quivering in excitement.
“You’re so goddamn cute! Here’s an orange slice!”
“Hehe, you and I are gonna join Beast Rearing!”
“You’ll see, it’s gonna be so EPIC!”
…
Squirrels stirred…
What kind of slavery was this?!
It was way more cozy than they had expected!
The first thing the human did was feed their brethren?! Then, an instant later, came the belly rubs. The guy thanked Jack enough to lose his breath and hurriedly left while wheezing.
Perhaps being sold wasn’t too bad? With this, the hunt for squirrels was officially over. Why forcefully abduct them when they could directly buy them from Jack instead?!
He simply stood there as the school went crazy…
“I’ll buy one right now! 30 Credits, right?!”
“Forget one. I’ll get five for my squad!!”
“I’ll get five, too, and for 40 Credits!!”
…
It was like printing Credits.
No, it was even better because it wouldn’t cause inflation either. The more squirrels he sold, the more their value increased! Oh, and he had the greatest monopoly ever!
At some point, a smart-ass quickly bought 10 squirrels for 30 Credits each, like an absolute big wig! Then, an instant later, he launched his own "business" with a grin…
“Selling Squirrels! Fast lane! No waiting time!”
“Only 80 Credits! Get yours right now!”
“At some point, classes WILL be full!”
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A squirrel scalper?!
It sounded so damn silly, but where there was money to be made, there would be resellers! Yet, just as the reseller had boldly proclaimed, came a laughing student.
“Everyone, hear this! Professor Wilder didn’t put any limit on the beast-rearing class! This means that as long as you have a squirrel, you WILL be accepted!”
That was amazing news for all but one…
A certain reseller couldn’t help but freeze. Luckily, even then, a student didn’t really care as he headed his way. To the new buyer, 80 credits was chump change regardless.
“80 Credits, was it? I’ll take a couple. I HATE waiting in line.”
The transaction was quickly over. Or was it?
The squirrels that had just been resold suddenly shared a glance with Jack, and that was all it took. His promise for safety? That wouldn’t apply if they pissed him off.
They didn't hesitate and ran for freedom, a buyer and a reseller freezing in place.
Then came snickering from squirrels and students alike. Those who were currently waiting in line especially felt relieved. That’s what they got for trying to game the system!
“Pfft— Look at those credits run! How inspiring!”
“How many did he buy and lose? Six? Wow!”
“Can you believe this dumbass?”
…
Pity? None! Seeing this, most gave up on competing. That feeling only got stronger as they noticed Jack and Sharky still drinking there, completely calm.
“That’ll be 30 Credits, Thank you, come again!”
“Jack, what should we do about the language test?”
“Hard to say. Heard it changes every year, but it’ll probably be something to test our memory. Forget cheating. I think it’s best if we simply try our best.”
“That’s easy for you to say. You’re always memorizing Super facts. But what am I supposed to do? I’m a Shark with a life! What happens if I blank during the exam, eh?”
The two were conversing as if no one was watching. They were neither worried about getting their product stolen, and neither did they care about moneybags either.
No matter how many credits one offered, they’d be treated the same.
“That’ll be 30 Credits, Thank you, come again!”
“That’ll be 30 Credits, Thank you, come again!”
“That’ll be 30 Credits, Thank you, come again!”
….
Then, Jack would return to his conversation.
He seemed incredibly carefree— or so it seemed. In fact, he was keeping an eye on the very long line, which grew increasingly restless as his stock dwindled.
After all, while one’s acceptance was final, who knew when a new directive from Teacher Wilder would fix what was clearly an unintended recruitment glitch?
It would be as easy as adding a student limit to his class! What if they finally got a squirrel but were too late anyway? To be safe, they really wanted one NOW!
But just as they worried…
“FREE SQUIRREL FOR ANYONE WITH INFO ON THE LANGUAGE TEST!”
“FREE SQUIRREL FOR ANYONE WILLING TO DITCH RUNIC CLASS!”
“FREE SQUIRREL FOR ANYONE WITH INFO ON THAT RESELLER!”
….
Ah?! This was the best opportunity!
As Jack shouted, so many students rose excitedly.
Info on the test? They could ask their seniors! Ditching the runic class? That one was quite hard, but not the only option. As for info on the reseller? The guy was just leaving, cackling to himself— which was never a good sign!
Like good little bees, his customers quickly spread all over the school, and it didn’t take long for many to return with info on the language class and its teacher.”
“Miss Valencia always hides bonus questions in her tests!”
“Miss Valencia gives bonus points for compliments!”
“Miss Valencia loves espressos a LOT!”
….
That was the gist, with some even delivering detailed sheets on the topic.
Most of it was useless, but Jack still gave them all a squirrel for trying, the students leaving with endless cheers. As for the reseller stalkers, they rushed back trembling.
“Crap! That salty guy went to find Professor Wilder!”
“He’s trying to get that glitch fixed!”
“This is bad. It’s about to END!”
That’s when panic set in. What had been a steady business mere seconds ago had quickly turned into a house of cards, one that was about to crumble under him.
Knowing this, Jack resolutely gave it all up…
“Alright! New promotion! Squirrels will pick whatever human they like best. You guys just send me the money later!” And that’s when he set all the ones he had left free.
[Ding! Successfully Made 147 Friends!]
[The Squirrels are Grateful!]
[Happy Pet, Happy Life!]
….
They were happy to have been sold?! He couldn’t help but grin as he watched them all leave with their respective new masters, a grin that only got bigger as he saw his bank account…
< Received 30 Credits Deposit From… >
< Received 30 Credits Deposit From… >
< Received 30 Credits Deposit From… >
…
It was an endless stream of notifications!
In total, he had made 4 410 Credits in a morning selling squirrels. Who knew Legendary-U could be that profitable?! And that’s when he felt Sharky’s hand on his shoulder.
“You keep it all; I’m fine money-wise for a while, BUT you better help me study for that language exam. Do we have a deal? Yes? Then I’ll be counting on you!”
Jack happily nodded. It wasn’t even about the Credits. If Sharky needed it, he’d give it all in a heartbeat. No, it was about having a brother that treated him so well. This was LIFE!
But just as he was enjoying himself, IT came…
“Selling without a permit? GUILTY!”
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
“Capturing wild beasts? GUILTY!”
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
“Setting camp illegally? GUILTY!”
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
They were under attack?! With every new violation, a glowing projectile would be sent their way, only to explode on their barrier, shaking it to no end! Actually, there was an end.
As the blue barrier broke, a haughty student was revealed…
The first thing Jack noticed was the cards. Blue and yellow, ethereal-looking and gleaming, they flew around him like sentient creatures, oozing so much power he choked.
As for the man’s blue hair or the hippie cut he adorned, it wasn’t even worth looking at, so he refocused on the magical cards once more.
That’s what had destroyed their barrier?! This guy was no joke, and yet, on his chest was an impossibility. < Second Year: Student Council Enforcer >
Seeing them freak out, the man flicked his long blue hair…
“You Newbies really screwed up. Hand over your gear, your student IDs, and ESPECIALLY those ill-gotten gains of yours! It’s time to pay up for exploiting fellow students!”
Had this guy joined the student council to rob people?! What was up with that insane list of demands? He was probably just messing with them, but that wasn’t even the issue.
They had classes to finalize! They couldn’t mess around with this clown! And if they missed the language test, they’d be royally screwed! And at this moment, they shared a look…
‘Sharky, this is bad. That guy broke your barrier!!!’
‘I was taking it down when he attacked…’
‘Still, he’s a second year.’
“RUNNN!!!!”
As they bolted away, what resounded behind them were endless curses. That and the whooshing sound of cards flying after them and exploding all over the goddamn place.
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
Fwoosh! Shiiiing—KRAK-KRRSH!
….
“Sharky’s, what the fuck is wrong with this school?!”
This was a Super school in a nutshell…