Rain didn’t often deter Theo. In fact, he often preferred it to a bright, sunny day. When he discovered a weather overlay app, he immediately downloaded it and set it to rain for a week straight, until it actually started raining and he remembered how much he didn’t like being wet.
“You know, there’s a simple solution to that.” Jacque said, seeing how uncomfortable Theo was as he walked onto the Criminal Investigations Division floor.
“Yeah?” Theo asked, dabbing at the drenched top half of his shirt with a balled-up paper towel. Jacque responded by tipping an invisible hat. Theo shook his head and rolled his eyes.
“C’mon, you’ve got the coat and the grizzled attitude already, why not round it out with the hat?”
“I’d rather not be so stereotypical and tacky.”
“Even if it’s used for its original purpose? You know... Keeping the rain off your head?” Jacque said with a laugh. He was currently sitting at Theo’s desk. Theo didn’t mind. The desk had become a dusty mailbox since he received his implants.
“What are you doing here, Jacque?”
“Just backing up some scenes and videos.”
“Okay, but what are you doing here? The servers are in the basement last I checked.”
“Can’t a guy just come say hello to his friend?” Jacque stood up from the chair and leaned back against the desk, reducing his distance to Theo. An outside observer might assume the gesture as a sort of playful flirt, but a longtime friend would immediately recognize the kind of smile Jacque was exhibiting.
“What’s up?” Theo asked with a hint of concern in his voice.
“I uh... it’s Amelie. Something weird is going on with her, I dunno.”
“Weird, how?”
“We had an argument a few days ago, and she’s been kind of, no-contact with us since then.”
“You and Chris?” Theo asked. Jacque nodded. “I mean, she’s a teenaged girl... I don’t imagine this is the first time?”
“You’re right, and honestly, it’s not the worst argument we’ve had. We’re just giving her space. We expected she wouldn’t talk to us for a few days... but her socials just seem... weird. She’s been using a lot more flowery language that didn’t really seem like her style. I commented on something and she replied... which was kind of weird in itself, but she also used... emojis?”
“Emojis, huh? From a teenaged girl? That is weird.” Theo’s words implied rolling eyes. Jacque looked at him like he was an idiot.
“You’ve met Amelie before, right? You know, your Goddaughter, who often babysat your own daughter, and whom you’ve babysat yourself? Ringing any bells?” Jacque said. Theo didn’t answer. “Well, you don’t have to be a detective or a close family friend to know that she hates emojis with a passion.” It was a pretty good dig at Theo, who responded with a respectable nod. “I know you don’t have a huge messaging history, but you’ve exchanged comments on socials and whatnot. In your memory, have you ever seen her use a smiley, a thumbs up, or even a goth-y black heart or whatever? She’s been writing like a lawyer or an engineer since she was in 6th grade, for Christ’s sake!”
As Jacque spoke, Theo pulled up her public online profile and looked randomly over some of her comments in the past weeks and months. Surely enough, she was a bit of a grammar nazi and loudly felt that an emoji could never replace the emotions expressed through the written word. It was a little much, in Theo’s opinion. Her front page almost read like a textbook on Gothic Subculture. Her most recent comments, however, looked more like something you would see from the average teenaged girl, and was frankly jarring when compared to previous messages.
“Okay, you have a point.” Theo said. “Have you already filed a missing person’s report?”
“Yeah, I have... just a few minutes ago before you came in.” Jacque looked down. He clearly didn’t have faith in the report. “I wanted to give a report directly to someone, but I was pointed to an online system.”
“I’m sorry...” Theo said. He knew that it was frustrating to the families of missing people, but he also knew how much more efficient and accurate the automated system was for reporting such cases. Theo browsed through the police log and quickly found the case. “I do see it in here, and it’s already been assigned to detectives Schanze and Holland. They’ll be in the meeting that’s about to start.” Theo pointed to the briefing room. “It won’t be long, and I’ll talk to them about it. I’d suggest you do the same after.”
“You’re not going to investigate it yourself?”
“Jacque.” Theo said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “You know I work in Homicide. You don’t want that investigation to be sent to me.” Theo could see on Jacque’s face that his words weren’t very comforting. Theo continued, “Don’t take this to mean that I don’t care. I’m going to be on those guys like ticks, scrutinizing everything they’re doing. Even if I were to take over the investigation, there would be a clear conflict of interest.”
“My daughter is missing... who the fuck gives a shit about a conflict of interest?” Jacque was starting to care less about keeping his voice at a private level.
“You would, Jacque! Especially when my emotions cause me to overlook or misinterpret evidence that could lead to finding her.”
“So, you’re not even going to-”
“I’m not even going to think about doing nothing.” Theo said, cutting Jacque off with a vague double negative. He gripped Jacque’s forearm to get his attention. “We need to trust the system on this.” It wasn’t a great thing to say in this day and age.
“Trust the system, Theo? Are you fuckin’ kidding me?”
“Hey, I didn’t say ‘believe’ in the system, or ‘have faith’ in the system. Part of trusting it is understanding that it has flaws, and your responsibility as a part of society is to find those flaws and work to fix them.”
“It’s a lot harder when the system works better for some than it does for others.”
“Yeah, that is one of the flaws, and the report did some work towards fixing it. But in this specific case, do you have any reason to believe that someone in power would want to take, or hurt Amelie?”
“Well... no...” Jacque said. “Not anyone specifically, but you already know there are tons of people out there who want to take advantage of a vulnerable young girl.”
“You might have been right to call out my sarcasm before, but I honestly don’t think ‘vulnerable’ is a word that describes Amelie.”
“I would have said the same thing about Kara.”
Theo wasn’t expecting a punch to the gut so early in the day. His immediate reaction was indignation. He wanted to plant his knuckles in Jacque’s face but didn’t get past tightening his fist before thinking better of it. What Jacque was saying wasn’t a statement about the level of care that Theo was providing to his wife. Instead, he was pointing out the fact that everyone is vulnerable when they are playing that damned game.
“You think she’s sunken into Wanderlust or something?”
“I dunno... maybe. To be honest, I kind of hope that’s all it is, but she’s never used bots or autoreply or anything like that. She’s usually pretty good about keeping up with her socials, even in the game.” Jacque said. About this time, several officers and detectives began filing into the briefing room. The meeting was about to begin.
“There’s not a whole lot to go on, I will admit, but after the meeting, give all the info you gave me to the detectives on your case, and anything else they ask for or that you can think of. I’ll do what I can to help.” Theo grabbed Jacque’s hand and gripped it tightly. “Just be ready for when we find her, because she’s going to be pissed that we did all this for nothing.”
“Yeah...” Jacque said with a half-hearted laugh. Theo pulled him into a firm embrace.
“She’ll be okay, Jacque.” Theo said. Jacque nodded as they separated. Jacque took a seat at Theo’s desk as Theo joined his colleagues in the briefing room.
The meeting was generally pointless. It could have been done entirely digitally, and it often was, but Captain Richardson insisted on a monthly in-person meeting so he could see his detectives face-to-face. The homicide desk was up early in the meeting. After covering the primary homicide assignments with the other detectives in his unit, the captain touched on the recently assigned suicide with Theo, who simply nodded in confirmation. For much of the rest of the briefing, Theo was pouring over the new victim’s social media and the images that had already been gathered from the scene.
Robin Evans was quite the poet, her social media littered with emotional and bleak commentary on the pain that comes with existence. Her medical records showed that she had been diagnosed with manic depression. What’s more, the very last post was a very clearly written suicide note, posted hours before her body was found. She had slit her wrists in her bathtub, next to a broken bottle of alcohol and an empty bottle of medication. The woman didn’t even have an interface of any kind. Within only minutes, Theo felt confident that the woman’s suicide was genuine, and was not related to his ongoing investigation. Still, he continued with his research until Captain Richardson called on the Missing Persons detectives. The captain mentioned Amelie’s case and the detectives acknowledged it. Theo stepped into the conversation.
“I’d like to investigate Amelie’s disappearance as part of my ongoing suicides case.” Theo said. This garnered looks of confusion mixed with subtle anger from detectives Schanze and Holland. Captain Richardson himself looked at Theo with a raised eyebrow. There was a momentary flicker of light in his eyes. Theo knew what he was looking into and was expecting a negative response.
“Amelie is your Goddaughter, so, absolutely not, but I would like to hear your reasoning.” The captain said.
“She’s got some similarities to Christina Auburg’s case. Her socials seem to have been taken over by bots recently, and she’s got a BSI.”
“You just described around ten percent of the population. That’s 80,000 people in Boston alone.” Captain Richardson had a point. Plenty of people were known to use bots to manage and post on their social media, and the bots saying weird things wasn’t an uncommon occurrence.
“I know... I just... it feels like it’s related, more than many of the other victims I’ve been investigating.”
“Using gut instinct to help find a connection when you have nothing else is fine, except when you have a relationship to the missing. You can’t be sure that your instinct isn’t being affected by your emotion, and statistically speaking, it probably is.” The captain was absolutely right, and Theo knew it. He put up his hands in a gestural apology. The captain continued. “Give Schanze and Holland access to your case files, should they need them. And detectives?” The captain looked at Schanze and Holland. “Keep the man updated, would ya?”
The briefing carried on as expected, and Theo met with the two other detectives and Jacque at his desk. He made sure to let them know that he wasn’t going to be stepping on their toes and stood by as support while Jacque gave his statement. After all was said and done, Theo insisted that Jacque and Chris take a day off. Jacque still wasn’t happy with Theo standing on the sidelines, a sentiment that was shared by Theo himself, but after giving the specifics to the two assigned detectives, their professionalism and attention to detail made the situation as comfortable as it could be.
On the way to the scene of Robin Lewis’s death, Theo continued going through the available evidence and crime scene images. Again, he could not find anything indicating foul play. It wasn’t long before Theo felt like he was looking at a brick wall. He still had several minutes before he would arrive at the scene, so he decided to kill time by lurking Forums. He joined the Boston Area Tech Philosophy forum.
PorcelainPantsu23: Whatup, Dick?
FoxyFrosting286: Hey, Dick!
HardBoiledDick44: Hey all.
DoctorDingwall: You really don’t think it’s possible?
FoxyFrosting286: Of course, it’s possible. The BSI wouldn’t work if it wasn’t capable of interrupting signals from the brain.
PorcelainPantsu23: And you can get any number of heart monitor apps already.
NortriptylineQueen: Yeah, but those apps can’t stop your heart.
DoctorDingwall: It’s not that they can’t, it’s that they aren’t programmed to... because it’s kind of illegal.
FoxyFrosting286: Actually, I read about some medical trials for BSI-based pacemaker apps that are designed to adjust heart rhythm, and even intentionally stop the heart for defibrillation or whatever.
NortriptylineQueen: Hmm... Well, I guess if those technically exist, then it is possible.
HardBoiledDick44: Just to be clear... You’re discussing the possibility that a Brainstem interface has the capability of stopping someone’s heart?
FoxyFrosting286: Not just the heart, but the lungs, kidneys, liver, pretty much everything.
NortriptylineQueen: Nothing like that has ever been reported though. You’d think if it was possible, somebody would have done it by now.
FoxyFrosting286: Bell-Westbrook has an insanely well-funded PR team.
DoctorDingwall: Sure, maybe, but Bell-Westbrook also has a very well-funded legal team. If it being against federal law wasn’t enough, any person who claimed to be able to do it would also have to go up against Bell-Westbrook. Even Syn isn’t stupid enough to do that.
PorcelainPantsu23: Just because nobody’s admitted to being able to do it doesn’t mean that it hasn’t been done before. I’d think not bragging about killing people is a no-brainer.
DoctorDingwall: Have you met humans? Many of them are notoriously vain and shortsighted.
ProcelainPantsu23: Fair point.
TornadoFloraMuffin: Well, if anyone is dumb enough to admit to something like that, it’s Synapse.
NortriptylineQueen: Could we stop talking about that asshole? You know how he is. Say his name too many times and he’ll apparate like a red-pilled Betelgeuse.
DoctorDingwall: Wasn’t Betelgeuse basically a redpill already?
PorcelainPantsu23: Haha!
NortriptylineQueen: A psychotic womanizer who excels at scaring the shit out of people as a job? Haha, I suppose you’re right!
FoxyFrosting286: He’s certainly scared away plenty of people in this very forum. Speaking of... has anyone spoken with Darkmatter lately? Or has he become the latest victim?
At his mention, Theo was reminded of the warrant he had requested a few days ago. Checking the status revealed that it still hadn’t gone through. Theo composed a relatively polite bump via message and had it sent to the magistrate assigned to review approval of his warrant, just as his vehicle pulled up to the suspected victim’s home. It was a nice, suburban home, or it would have been nice a few decades ago, but had since fallen into disrepair like most residences outside of Beacon Hill.
It wasn’t as crowded as it had been previously. The only officer on the scene was in the process of trying to take a statement from the victim’s distraught girlfriend. Theo exchanged a glance and a nod with the officer, and that’s all it took for Theo to begin receiving live video, audio, and a transcript as well as all other case data that had been gathered thus far. They exchanged no words as Theo passed by them on the driveway and made his way into the home.
It was much more spacious than his current apartment, though nearly as sparsely decorated, save for the empty bottles of alcohol and pills strewn about. The sizeable front room reminded Theo of his former home, the one he and Kara lived in with Alice. The distressed surroundings in particular prompted memories of his home in the time after Alice’s death.
Theo wasn’t ecstatic about having to spend an extended period of time in such a place that reminds him of his darkest days, but he soldiered on, videogrammetrically scanning the place as he investigated. The closest things to a personal computer the woman had in her home was an internet connected television that looked like it had been broken for months, and a smartphone with similar damage, but was still functional. On his run through the kitchen, he noticed a knife missing from the knife block and took note of the manufacturer of the set. He expected he would find the missing cutlery later.
He made a pass-through Robin’s bedroom, again finding nothing conflicting with the mindset of a suicidal person. Last came the bathroom in which the victim was found. Theo paused before stepping inside and wondered why he didn’t try to argue that this case was emotionally compromising to him. When he stepped into the room, his heart sank as he recalled his own experience. He couldn’t remember anything about the moments before, during, and after due to his intense inebriation at the time, but he distinctly remembered the image of his wife laying in a bath so deep red that it looked like undiluted blood.
Shivers ran up and down his spine and there was a catch in his breath, as if his brain had forgotten for a moment how his lungs worked. Theo let the feeling wash over him, accepting and acknowledging the intense emotions. He finally shook it off. It was a terrible memory, but it was in his past, and he felt confident that his wife wouldn’t do it again. At least, not in such a willfully violent way.
There were a few details that were different from his wife’s attempt, however. Specifically, there was a freshly emptied bottle of antidepressants paired with a bottle of vodka. He didn’t need to see the vodka to know that she likely downed the entire bottle. Theo wondered if it was possible that he was getting the stench of alcohol straight from the blood in the water. He knelt down next to the bathtub to get a better look at the wounds in her arms. The gash in her left arm was incredibly deep and long. So deep that Theo surmised the woman may have severed the tendons in her arm, as evidenced by the significantly more shallow cuts in her right arm. When taking a closer look at her right arm, Theo found the missing knife in the bathwater underneath it.
Theo pulled up Robin’s social medias again, quickly finding photos and videos showing her to be right hand dominant. Everything fell into place. He felt confident that Robin’s suicide was genuine, but Theo still notified the Crime Scene Investigation team to collect the body for further investigation, as was standard procedure for suspected murders. He felt his job here was done, and just in time to be notified that his warrant had been processed and approved.
‘Delighted’ wasn’t quite the word he wanted to use in the presence of such an awful scene, but he did feel relieved that he could finally continue with his investigation. As he hopped back into his vehicle, he verified the Forums account that belonged to Christina was, in fact, MegiddoWillow9. He began at the end, the very last message that she received.
Synapse: You wanna see something really scary?
Theo was caught completely off-guard. He was now confident that Synapse was behind both Christina and Jackson’s deaths, and he was surprised at how easy and quick it had been. Shortly before the threat was a message to the moderators of the Tech Philosophy chat, a complaint about Synapse’s hostility and abrasiveness toward anyone and everyone. It wasn’t the first time either. She had made multiple complaints, but the mods didn’t seem to ever do anything. He also noticed that only one mod had even replied to her. Now that the warrant for Christina’s account had gone through, Theo had another set of warrants sent for approval to access the chat history of all users who had interacted with both Christina and Jackson. The warrants were approved before Theo even had time to give Chess a scratch under her chin.
The first person he wanted to look into, clearly, was Synapse, but when he selected to open their profile, for a brief moment, he could only see a corrupted mess within their profile information, and then the Forums app crashed.
“Fuck!” Theo yelled, causing the cat to jump. “Oh... Sorry Chess...”
It was hacker bullshit. He knew it before Synapse’s account kicked him out several more times, but he tried anyway. Aside from Synapse and the mod handling complaints, there weren’t any other users that had spoken to both Christina and Jackson in private messages. As was approved in the warrant, Theo went the only other way he could and began looking into the mod’s history. The singular active mod for the Tech Philosophy forum was SoxyNerd34, real name Joshua Moore. Theo had a lot more information on him as well because the man had a police record, having been arrested for petty theft. Theo sent him a request for an in-person chat from his police account. It was accepted within minutes, with his address included. Theo ordered his vehicle to the location.
Joshua lived in a low-income apartment, an old brick structure that hadn’t had the funding for maintenance in nearly a decade. When Theo arrived, he sent a message, asking him if he would meet him in his vehicle. When Joshua asked whether he was in trouble for something, Theo said that he was only doing a check-in with former offenders as part of a community outreach program. He also offered the man a meal. The man, justifiably, responded saying that if Theo arrested him under false pretenses, his lawyer would be hearing about it. Theo said he was willing to go up to the man’s apartment, but Joshua refused and agreed to come down.
The man stopped on the sidewalk, looking at Theo with the doors to his vehicle open and inviting. Joshua looked as skeptical as he was tired. His face was gaunt, with sharp cheekbones and a thin jawline. The dark circles under his eyes betrayed his sleeplessness and he carried himself with a sense of unease, his movements quick and jerky.
“Good afternoon, Joshua. My name is Theo.” The detective offered the man his palm in greeting.
“How do I know you aren’t just going to arrest me, and lock me in and take me to jail or something?”
“Well, I’m a detective. I don’t often arrest people myself, I would just have some uniforms come and pick you up in that case. And, I would hope that my car is at least a little more comfortable than a police cruiser.” Theo said. In an effort to appear less intimidating, Theo stepped back into his vehicle first. “And if you’re locked in here, then so am I.”
Joshua still wasn’t sure. Like the rest of the country, Joshua had little trust in the police, but he thought about the consequences if he didn’t comply. He was afraid that a gang of uniforms would break down his door and disappear him if he refused. Joshua timidly entered the vehicle and sat opposite to Theo. The doors gently closed automatically, and as the vehicle began to move down the street, Theo could see that Joshua was still alarmed.
“Look...” Theo said, in an attempt to further calm the man. He reached over and pulled the handle to one of the doors. The car came to a stop as the door opened. “You are free to leave at any time, we won’t be going far from here.” Theo closed the door again, and the vehicle continued driving. A few seconds later, Joshua suddenly opened the door closest to him and the vehicle came to another stop, though he didn’t step out.
“Sorry...” Joshua said, then closed his door. “I just wanted to be sure...”
“Hey, that’s fine man. I understand.” Theo kept a reassuring smile on his face. “You hungry? I’ll get you anything you want, as long as we eat it in here.”
“What do you want?” Joshua said abruptly.
“I dunno, I could go for a cheap cheeseburger and fries.”
“No, I mean, what do you want with me?”
“Ah, yes.” Theo nodded. “First, let me explain why I wanted to talk with you in here. There’s a single data access point in this car,” Theo pointed to a small dome protruding from the ceiling, “otherwise, we’re in a completely enclosed Faraday cage.” He reached up and flipped a switch on the dome, and they were both alerted through their interfaces that they’ve lost network connection.
Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.
“What, so you can threaten me and it won’t be recorded?”
“You can record all you like, but I don’t think you want to. I’d actually like to talk to you about Synapse.”
As soon as Joshua heard the name, he quickly reached for the door, but paused before opening it. Theo didn’t stop him. The man slowly leaned back into his seat.
“Is this a trick?” He asked.
“I’m not really sure how else I can prove that I’m not interested in arresting you. All I can really say is that I’m after Synapse, and I’m pretty sure that you aren’t him.”
“Are you real?”
“Uhh...” Theo was already starting to understand why Joshua looked like he was seeing ghosts. “Frankly... I don’t know how I can prove that I’m real. It kinda seems like reality is pretty subjective as of late.” Theo said. Joshua didn’t respond, so Theo continued. “Did he threaten you?... Did he do something?”
Joshua looked around like he was expecting something to jump out at him. He did seem to be reacting to Theo as he spoke, but the delayed reactions made Theo wonder just how long the man had gone without properly sleeping. For a few seconds after asking the question, Theo thought the man had fallen asleep sitting up, staring out the window. Then he turned back toward Theo and jumped as if he hadn’t expected him to be sitting there.
“Joshua, are you okay?” Theo asked.
“I’m, uh... I’m fine. And it’s just Josh. No normal person has preferred to be called ‘Joshua’ for a couple centuries now.”
“So... what about Synapse?”
“Oh... that fuckin guy.” Joshua looked around the cabin, and up at the access point on the ceiling. “Are you sure... he can’t get to us in here?”
“Well, Josh, I’m not sure, to be honest. I don’t know much about Synapse, and was hoping that you’d be able to give me something. But, if he needs a network connection, this car is specifically designed to keep them out, so, I’m pretty sure he can’t get in that way.”
“But... he could get in some other way?” Josh asked. He could tell that Theo had a few doubts.
“He’s been doing things to people... Giving them visions, right?” Theo asked. Simply mentioning it, he could see confirmation in Josh’s face. “If he’s been doing it over the internet, then I think you’ll be fine in here... but...”
“But what?”
“If whatever program he’s using is installed directly on your BSI... well...” Theo trailed off, letting the silence answer for him. Josh looked back out the window. His started nervously tapping his foot and tightly crossed his arms.
“But... what if it’s not a program? What if it’s not even Synapse?”
“What do you mean?”
“What if it’s in my head? Like, not in my Interface, but actually my brain fucking with me?”
“I’m afraid if that’s the case, it’s a little too far outside my area of expertise. Have you been seeing things before you came in contact with Synapse?”
Josh paused for a few moments. His leg stopped tapping and he looked back over at Theo.
“If you suddenly started hallucinating after meeting Synapse, that seems to make the case that it’s not a problem with your brain, right?”
“I’ve hallucinated before after taking...” Josh paused, reminding himself that he was speaking with a police detective. Theo couldn’t care less, especially since most hallucinogenic drugs have been legal for over a decade now. Even if Josh admitted to using the illegal ones, Theo wasn’t about to arrest anyone for it. Josh continued, “Uhh... after a bad reaction to some medication... but these... these visions are different. They’re much more real... More tangible.”
“Even more reason to believe that they aren’t being made by your own brain.” Theo said. Josh felt some small bit of relief from Theo’s reasoning, but it didn’t suddenly make everything okay. “How long have you been seeing them?”
“I uh...” Josh looked down at his bare wrist, a common gesture to check the time and date for anyone with an Interface. Josh shook his head. “I don’t really know...”
“How long has it been since you’ve been able to get an ounce of sleep?”
“I can’t really say... The thing just happens so often, and pretty much anytime I close my eyes.”
“When you close your eyes? How do you see them with your eye’s closed?”
“I can feel them... and hear them...” Josh shivered as he spoke.
“These hallucinations, or visions, you said you weren’t sure if it was Synapse that was doing this... If you think it’s unrelated, then... why are you afraid of Synapse?”
“That fuckin’ asshole is like a black hole on the internet. I’m sure if you’re investigating him, you’ve already seen his profile.” Josh said. Theo looked out the window with a transparent stoicism, and Josh started laughing and shaking his head. It was the first time Theo saw him smile. “HardBoiledDick44? That’s gotta be you... right?”
“No comment.”
“God, you’re just so into the detective shtick, aren’t you? Do you enjoy being a walking, talking, embodiment of a stereotype?” Josh’s words cut deeper than Theo let on. “Tell me, what kind of porn is a hardcore blue-shitter like yourself into? Minority rape-play? Maybe not even with the -play part?”
“You’re not afraid of cops, even after all the things you’ve seen and heard about them, but you’re scared of some scrawny red-pilled nerd with a keyboard over the internet?”
“Keyboard?” Josh laughed again. “Are you stuck in the 20’s? With a BSI, your thoughts, and a half decently trained AI, you can write incredibly complex hacks and do a ton of damage to someone’s wealth, reputation, get them arrested, get them killed via vigilante justice. You name it.”
“You think Synapse is capable of doing that?”
“Absolutely.”
“Do you think he has done any of that?” Theo asked. Josh paused to think about it.
“Hmm... I would say it seems like it by how knowledgeable he is, and just by his general, antagonistic demeanor, but I don’t think he’s ever admitted to doing anything. At least, nothing illegal, or worthy of reporting to the police.”
“What about the reports to the mods?” Theo said, gesturing toward Josh.
“Yeah, we have had plenty of complaints, and we’ve tried suspending and even banning him outright, but the request never goes through in the system. In fact, the other mods of BA Tech Phil dropped out a couple of weeks ago, and I’ve seen the same from mods in some of the other forums he was in as well.”
“What other forums were those?”
“Uhh... cryptography, programming, a pretty big Wanderlust one I think.”
“Were the other ones based around Boston as well?”
“Not those ones... but I think I saw him in an MIT forum a few times.”
“The other mods... have you spoken to them since they left?”
“Yeah. They just stopped modding BA Tech Phil, they’re still mods on other forums.”
“These weren’t mods, but do you remember the users MegiddoWillow9 and DarkmatterDisaster?” Theo asked. Josh was silent for a moment. He was getting pale.
“Yeah... they were some of the most outspoken users against Synapse... they haven’t been online in a while... They were listed in the warrant, weren’t they?” Josh asked.
“You’re in the Boston Area Tech Philosophy forum, you’ve got a BSI. You seem pretty knowledgeable about its capabilities.”
“Probably not as much as Synapse, but I’d like to think so, sure.” Josh said. Theo paused for a moment before his next question, putting a point on its importance.
“Do you think it’s possible to take over someone’s physical body? Make them kill themselves?”
Josh didn’t answer right away, not audibly, at least. As he began processing why Theo would ask such a question, Theo could see the worry again creeping into his expression.
“These visions... I suppose that’s something that can come from the BSI. I mean, even Wanderlust has some rudimentary touch capabilities. And...” Josh gave a very subtle laugh as he shook his head. “I can certainly see something like this driving a person to suicide... but... Actually controlling a persons body, I’m not so sure about that.”
“I was just reading in the forum about BSI-based heart-trackers and pacemakers being able to monitor and control your heart.”
“Those are autonomic functions... there’s not a whole lot of data there, and it’s pretty easy to write a program to control that. Hell, basic programming from nearly a century ago would still probably work with a little translating, but active coordination is a lot more tricky. There are more signals that would need to be interpreted by the hosts BSI and sent over the internet, and then it needs to be converted back into a signal that the user’s brain can make sense of, then it has to do it again the other way.”
“Sounds complicated.”
“Very... and on that scale, everybody’s brain is different. Your motor cortex doesn’t have the exact same structure as mine. Even twins would have trouble.”
“But isn’t calibration like... the very first thing that you do when you get the implants?”
“Well, yeah... and it’s pretty much always calibrating in the background.”
“It does sound complicated, but I’m not convinced that it’s impossible.”
“If none of that makes it impossible, then Bell-Westbrook’s security does.”
“Yeah, I heard that one before too. Again, I’m not quite hearing ‘impossible’. Instead, I’m hearing ‘very hard’.” Theo said. Josh found himself reluctantly agreeing with Theo, but was trying to find any reason why someone wouldn’t want to do it.
“Okay... even if someone got past BW’s firewall, you would notice the delay and the difference in motor detail. It would be sickening.”
“Sounds kind of like being drunk to me.”
“I think it’s less ‘kind of drunk’ and more ‘completely shit-faced’.” Josh said.
He wasn’t much of an alcohol drinker, and thought it often looked completely unenjoyable. Theo, however, thought it sounded like a great time. The two continued their discussion regarding Synapse and the possibility of controlling another person’s body remotely. Their talk was longer than a leisurely drive around the city block, and eventually, after passing by Josh’s apartment again, Theo still had things he wanted to ask him, but he also wanted to observe. Josh was starting to become more comfortable toward Theo as well.
Theo asked what his favorite restaurant was, half expecting that Josh would try to take advantage, sending him to Ruby’s Chad Mansion for an $80 steak, but to his surprise, Josh chose Charlie’s Entertainment. It was a strange choice, but at least it was reasonably cheap. Theo reminded Josh about their safety inside the car, and suggested he would pick up a pizza to go, and they would eat in the car, but Josh said he would be more comfortable going inside, and understood the risks. Theo didn’t fight him.
After arriving, the two went inside and to the counter where Josh ordered a large supreme pizza, then went to one of the many empty tables, as expected in the early afternoon on a school day. Still, there were a couple of delinquents, a boy and a girl, who were running around the game area, having the time of their lives.
“What is it about this place that you like?” Theo asked. “I don’t expect it’s the quality of the pizza, and I hope it’s not the target audience.”
“No... man, c’mon. When I was a kid, I would come here a lot with my brother as an escape. I also happen to think that the pizza here is better than most places.” Josh said. He paused, listening to the loud chime of the games and laughter echoing through the large empty space. “It’s kind of relaxing, in a blissfully ignorant way, no?”
Closing his eyes, Theo slouched back in the chair and listened to the noise. He never had any memories of going to places like this when he was a child, but it was starting to become his daughter’s favorite place. When he heard the girl’s laughter from the game area, a glimpse of his daughter’s smiling face flooded his thoughts. Theo smiled back, but he knew what always happened whenever he thought about Alice, and before that could happen, he opened his eyes and shook himself back to reality.
“So... She’s dead?” Josh asked. Theo was alarmed, and confused for a moment, then Josh continued. “MegiddoWillow9?”
“Oh! Uh...” Theo took a moment to regain his composure. He cleared his throat. “I can’t make any comments regarding the case, but you can read the warrant for more details.” The moment that Theo stopped speaking, Joshua’s eyes lit up. He took a few seconds to skim the details.
“Suspicious suicide?... Darkmatter too? And you think Sy-” Josh was cut off by Theo clearing his throat and understood his intention. “You think someone convinced them to kill themselves?”
“It’s hardly an original scenario.”
“I mean, I don’t know about Darkmatter, but I think I knew Megiddo pretty well, at least as well as a rando on the internet could know her.” Josh said. Theo raised an eyebrow toward him. “Okay, maybe not any rando. I knew her as well as a normal, well-adjusted person online could. We’ve had discussions about suicide, and she’s vehemently opposed to it. It goes against her core beliefs.”
The pizza was delivered to their table. Josh took a couple slices and stuffed his mouth. Theo sat back and watched.
“Feel free to have a slice.” Josh said, the food muffling his voice.
“Have you ever met her in person?”
“I don’t think so.”
“You... don’t think so?”
“Well, yeah... We’ve never made plans to meet in person and I never sought her out, but we do both live in and around Boston. I might have run into her and not known it.”
“Is it possible that maybe her online persona is different from how she is in real life?”
“I’d argue that your online persona IS your real persona, and the one you use when in meatspace is the fake one.”
“How do you figure?”
“You’re not as likely to get punched in the face when you speak your mind online.”
“I suppose that is true. Though it seems to me that some people can do a lot more damage than a punch to the gut through the internet.”
“I think that it’s rare enough that people don’t really worry about that.”
“Well, maybe when I’m done with this investigation, it might remind people to be a bit more cautious online.”
“By watching what they say? By censoring themselves? By making sure they aren’t offending hidden psychopaths?”
Theo thought he would quit before delving too deep into the security vs. freedom debate. He took a slice of pizza and picked off the olives and green peppers, eliciting an eyeroll from Josh, then stuffed his mouth so he wouldn’t continue the conversation. Theo admitted through his expression that the pizza was, in fact, pretty good. The two ate quietly, listening to the subtle sounds of blissful youth in the background. Theo fiddled with his stylus as he continued looking over previous interactions. In particular, Theo wanted to see just how much Josh had been looking into Christina. Just as Josh said, he had some conversations within the forum, and had chatted with her one-on-one a few times, mostly regarding Synapse, but beyond that, Josh didn’t look at her profile or social medias more often than anyone else’s.
Just beyond the forum window, Theo saw Josh drop a half-eaten slice of pizza, almost throwing it down onto his plate. When Theo looked at his face, he saw disgust and confusion. Josh was looking at the pizza, his mouth agape. A second later, Josh spat out the masticated food into his hand. He looked at it, then dropped it onto his plate with a yell and a jump, and whipped his hands away.
“Josh... what is it?” Theo asked.
Josh shoved his fingers into his mouth and fervently scraped any remaining food from his tongue, and then began to vomit over the plate and table, ruining the remaining pizza. Theo pushed himself out of his seat and away from the table. As he stood up, Josh took a single glance at him, then shouted and fell back over the bench to the ground.
“No! Oh my God!” Josh said.
He started shouting and scrambling away, cowering from Theo. As Theo came around the table, Josh rolled over and started trying to get to his feet. Theo reached him quickly, pushing him back onto the ground on his chest, then with practiced dexterity, he pulled the handcuffs from his belt and had them clasped to Josh’s wrists in seconds. Theo looked up to see the two kids and a couple of employees looking over with understandable concern, as Josh was screaming bloody murder.
“Boston Police!” Theo shouted. He pulled his badge from his belt and displayed it to the small crowd. “I have this under control, please step out of our path to the doors!”
Theo pulled Josh up by the back of his shirt and held on tightly as Josh tried to run the moment he was on his feet. Theo was effective at keeping him within his grip as they left through the doors and to Theo’s car. It was a struggle to get him inside, but eventually, Josh’s strength was waning, and he was unable to resist, but he didn’t stop trying, even after the doors had closed. Theo held him down against the seat as he continued screaming and squirming. The vehicle moved into an idling pattern. After a full minute, the screams turned to cries.
“Please! Just kill me!” Josh yelled.
“You’re okay, Josh! It’s me, Theo! I’m the detective, remember?” Theo tried to get through to him, though he had no idea if it was working. It was possible that Josh’s implants could be blocking his brain from receiving outside audio altogether. One thing was clear, since it didn’t stop as soon as they entered the vehicle, it was a pretty good indication that it didn’t require network access. It was something installed directly on his BSI.
Theo wasn’t sure how much more he could take before he was going to have to report it to somebody. He knew that he should have reported it already, but the opportunity to see the effects of this virus or hack, it was too good to pass up. But there would come a point of diminishing returns, in the form of consequences. He continued restraining and observing Josh, but as another minute passed, his worries were mounting.
“Come on, man, snap out of it or I’m going to have to take you to the hospital!” Theo said. It seemed like the fear of financial ruin made its way through whatever Josh was currently seeing.
“No! No hospitals...” Josh said. He was in a flop sweat with damp spots growing on his shirt.
“I dunno... you seem pretty fucked up to me.”
“No... I’m fine... it’s going away.” Josh said. After holding his eyes shut for the past few minutes, he began to open them. He was still shaking but was no longer resisting against Theo’s hand. Theo slowly removed his palm from Josh’s chest.
“I think it might be a good idea to see a doctor about getting it removed or disabled.”
“Okay, yeah, I’ll do that, just take me home and I’ll set up an appointment.” Josh said. Theo shrugged and shook his head in concern for Josh but ordered his vehicle to Josh’s apartment anyway.
“Are you seeing anything anymore?” He asked.
“Uhh...” Josh looked around, but beyond glances, he didn’t seem to look directly at Theo. “No... I don’t think so...” Josh said. Theo took a deep breath and sat back against the seat next to him.
“What the hell did you see?” Theo asked. Josh shifted around in his chair, looking out the windows and all around, unsure if the visions had stopped.
“I saw... a lot... To be honest, I’m not really sure where to begin. How long ago did it start?”
“It’s only been a few minutes.”
“Really?” Josh sank in his seat. “That’s not what it felt like.”
“You were sitting there eating your pizza and you suddenly spat it out and vomited before freaking out.”
“The pizza...? Yeah... I was eating it, and I felt something moving around in my mouth... when I spat it out and looked at it. It looked like rot and mold, and it was swarming with these little red maggot things. But... they weren’t like regular maggots... I didn’t look too closely but... they kind of looked like little fetuses...”
“That would explain the vom, but when you looked at me, you saw something terrifying.” After Theo mentioned it, Josh looked at him, but instantly looked away, far enough away to try and keep Theo completely out of his line of sight.
“I saw... It looked like... your eyes were gone... but not gone. They were like a void, but not just emptiness, it was the eyes of... something else. It looked like... it felt like your body was a shell, but the thing inside you, the dark emptiness, was larger than your body. Much larger, and it was controlling you like a puppet.”
It didn’t sound all that frightening to Theo. It sounded like the kind of thing a goth would use as their avatar, but Theo saw a tear fall from Josh’s eye. Theo let him continue.
“The darkness... It was... uh...” Josh’s voice was quivering. “It was like... you know how bright light can be blinding and painful to look at, well, this darkness was so dark, that everything else around it seemed blinding in comparison. I just remember not being able to look away. It felt like, if I looked away, you would- the thing would immediately get me, but in staring right at it, it was like it was feeding on my attention, and it was growing...” Josh was becoming more frantic as he described it. “And I couldn’t get away, and it was getting closer, and I could hear it in my head, and I couldn’t understand what it was saying, and it sounded so joyful, but it wanted to hurt me!”
As Josh rambled, he became more worked up. He started shaking, sniffling, and even openly weeping. His voice cracked and warped until his words became unintelligible sobs. Theo tried to comfort him by grabbing his hand, but Josh jumped with fright, already forgetting about the man sitting next to him. Theo gripped him tightly with both hands.
“Josh! It’s okay!” Theo said. “Just breathe... You’re alright.”
For the remainder of the ride, Theo sat in silence. In his years in law enforcement, he had to be there for dozens, if not hundreds of abused, assaulted, or otherwise deeply disturbed victims and their families. He had seen intense fear in people’s eyes, but he had never seen a person as close to being literally ‘scared to death’ before. When the vehicle pulled up beside Josh’s building, Theo shuffled to the seat opposite of him and the two sat in silence. Josh looked somehow worse than when Theo had picked him up. He didn’t seem to want to go inside, but not because he felt safe inside the vehicle. He simply saw no reason to. Theo stepped out and held the door open. Josh slowly rolled his way out and started walking up the stoop into his building, without so much as a parting gesture. Theo didn’t mind. He did feel guilt, however, like he wasn’t doing enough to protect the kid.
“Hey...” He said. Josh stopped and looked back. “I know you said you aren’t going to the hospital, but I don’t feel right doing nothing, so I’m going to have someone come and check on you.”
“Fine, but if I see a medical bill, you’ll be seeing a lawsuit.” Josh turned and continued into his building.
The first person that came to mind was Chris Dumont, Jacque’s husband and a tenured psychiatrist who Theo would often turn to in these situations. However, their daughter was missing, and Theo had just told them earlier in the day to take a break from work to focus on that. Instead, he sent a request to dispatch to have them find and send someone over. Theo was done for the day. After stepping back into his car, he ordered the car to MCI-Concord for a visit with Ellis.
“What made you think about her this time?” Ellis asked across the table.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, the only reason you ever drop by is to talk about your daughter.” Ellis said. Theo was taken aback.
“What? That’s not true.”
“C’mon man, it is.” Ellis leaned back against his seat. Theo’s eyes avoided his gaze. “I’m not offended or anything, but I’m also not completely stupid. It makes sense, in a weird way.”
Theo looked at his own tightly interlocked hands on the table. Despite Ellis’s reassurance, Theo still felt no small amount of guilt. There was a moment of silence.
“I’m sorry, Ellis.” Theo said. Ellis crossed his arms and his brow furrowed in displeasure.
“Dude, what did I tell you about apologizing to me?”
“Just hear me out, alright?” Theo said. Ellis waived one of his hands, gesturing for Theo to continue. “It might not feel like it for you, exactly, but to me, it almost feels like I’m punishing you by talking about her. And, hell, maybe there is some part of me that sorta likes the idea of trying to torture you with this stuff, but I mostly just... want to talk to somebody about her. I mean, the way it ended wasn’t...-” Theo trailed off for a moment, then shook his head, “But when I think about her smile and laughter, it fills me with warmth and resolve.”
“This might be a stupid question but... why don’t you talk about her with your wife?”
“Well... A lot of the time, when I do think about her, I often start thinking about... you know... and I worry that’s all that Kara would think about. I don’t want to do that to her.”
“Yeah, that makes sense. Well, I just want to let you know, you can talk about her to me anytime. So, what was it that made you think of your daughter?”
“We went to Charlie’s Entertainment.”
“You and Kara?”
“No, no. I went with someone related to a case I’m working on.”
“Like... A child?” Ellis raised his eyebrows.
“No! It was... ugh.” Theo rolled his eyes. “It’s neither here, nor there why we were there, but it wasn’t weird, okay?” Theo said. Ellis put up his hands backing off the subject.
“Alright, alright, but I imagine you saw some kids there or something?”
“Yeah... A boy and a girl playing hooky.”
“Did you go over and call their parents?”
“What? No. C’mon man, there are a lot worse places to be when skipping school than Charlie’s Entertainment. Anyway... just hearing them running around and laughing... well, I guess that’s it.”
“Ah.” Ellis said. “Did you ever take Alice there?”
“Yeah... a few times. She wasn’t old enough to play a lot of the arcade-y games and stuff, but she had a lot of fun climbing around the play area and loved the pizza.” Theo smiled and then started laughing to himself. “Actually... the last time we were there, Kara and I were eating, and we let Alice go play. Five minutes later, she’s brought back to the table by an employee, her front side completely covered in blood, but she was laughing and giggling the entire time. Apparently, as soon as she got to the play area, she faceplanted on a hard piece of plastic and gave herself a nosebleed, but just got right back up and continued playing as if nothing happened.
“She left a trail of blood all around the play area and on all of the surfaces... I mean, I’ve seen stabbings that were cleaner than that.” Theo shook his head and hid his face in his hand, laughing. “They had to close the play area and clean down the entire thing. I remember seeing the employees on their hands and knees with cleaning supplies, just looking at us with total disdain as we left. God that was so embarrassing.” Theo said. As he recalled the story, he was just beaming with nostalgia.
“That sounds like... a good time?” Ellis wasn’t quite sure how he felt about the story, but he could see the happiness on Theo’s face.
“I mean, yeah, it was humiliating and kinda gross, and Kara was completely horrified at the whole thing, but Alice thought it was hilarious, and because of that, so did I.” Theo said with a genuine smile.
“Wow.” Ellis said, leaning back in his chair.
“What?”
“Nothing... it’s just... I don’t know if I’ve ever seen you so happy.”
“Oh...” Theo hid his smile in his hand and wasn’t quite sure what to say.
“I suppose I don’t really know much, but it seems like she was just about the best thing to ever happen to you.”
“Yeah... though it wasn’t just her. It was all of us, Kara, Alice, and me. I’m not one to say that the traditional family unit of mother-father-child is always perfect, but for us, it absolutely was. It was heaven made manifest.”
“That’s incredibly sappy.” Ellis said with a chuckle. “Are you sure that Kara felt the same way?”
“Yeah, absolutely.” Theo said without hesitation. Ellis didn’t respond, but Theo inferred a question about whether he really knew her. “It’s not like we had a shotgun wedding, or just got married in Vegas on a whim. I’ve known Kara since we were kids, and I think I’d be a pretty shitty detective if I couldn’t tell whether my wife and child were happy.”
“I dunno... I might just be a kid with a GED from prison, so I don’t know if my ideas are worth much, but it seems to me that the solution to your current woes might already be on your mind.”
“Uh... what?” Theo wasn’t quite sure what Ellis was referring to.
“What I mean to ask, detective, is: have you considered maybe having another kid?”
There was a silence. At first, Ellis thought that Theo was going to lay into him about Alice being a miracle baby, or that he was impotent or something, but Theo sat back in his seat and looked up at the ceiling in contemplation.
“It’s a pretty big decision,” Ellis continued, “I know. It’s probably a better idea to talk to your wife about it, or at least get the opinion of someone who’s... you know... not incarcerated.”
“Nonsense.” Theo said, waiving his hand at the notion that Ellis’s opinion didn’t matter. “Most people outside don’t know what they’re talking about any more than you or I. Though, I think you have a point about at least talking to Kara about it. It’d be a little weird if she didn’t know about it...”
Ellis laughed. The two continued chatting, the discussion morphing from family to sports and old movies, as it often did. After an hour of visiting, Theo returned home. He followed his regular path, subconsciously holding his breath until he could confirm that Kara was okay. After sitting down next to her on the bed, he touched her shoulder.
Kara didn’t respond. Not until Theo squeezed and shook her shoulder as his fear began to rise, and Kara reached up to brush his hand off of her. The negativity of the gesture was overlooked by Theo’s relief. He could breathe again.
“Hey, beautiful?” He said. Kara didn’t look at him, but turned her head slightly, which was all the indication Theo needed that she was listening. He stood up from the bed and began putting his things away and disrobing. “I’ve been thinking about you today. I mean, I’m always thinking about you, but... Today I was feeling a little nostalgic, I guess.” Theo paused for a response, but he didn’t get one, so he continued. “I just thought it’s been a while since we’ve been together. I know we are together right now, but I mean, like... really together. Just you and me, enjoying each-other’s company.” Still, Theo was met with silence. Glancing over at her, she was still in a posture that indicated that she was listening, so again, Theo continued.
“And I was thinking about how hesitant I was when we were gonna have a kid, and how scared I was when we found out it was a girl. But... well, she turned out fill this part of me that I didn’t really know was missing. Together, with you, and her and I, I felt like we were complete, and I guess I only really realized that after she was...” Theo couldn’t say it. There was a catch in his throat. He felt like he couldn’t even say his little girl’s name in the presence of Kara. After stripping down to his underwear, Theo plopped down onto the mattress and rolled over next to his wife. He placed one of his arms underneath her, wrapped the other around her belly and pulled himself close to her. He brushed the side of his face into her soft hair and lowly spoke into her ear. “What do you say? You want to have another baby?”
Despite her noticeably cold and increasingly bony form, Theo was comfortable, but just as quickly as he nestled into her, she pushed herself out of his grasp, and pressing her body into the corner against the wall in response.
“No.” Kara said, wrapping as much of the sheets she could find around her body. Theo felt the pit in his stomach instantly grow to a point where he couldn’t speak. He pushed himself back to the edge of the bed and sat up. He stared at Kara’s back as pain and confusion flooded his brain. He couldn’t understand what happened, or what it was that he did wrong. He stood back up from the bed, but nearly lost his balance, as it seemed all his strength had immediately left his body. He held his head and nervously pulled at his thinning hair. He paced the empty space in their room a few times. He wanted to ask her what was wrong, or what he did.
“Okay.” Was all that Theo could get out, so low and quiet, he wasn’t quite sure if he had said anything at all. He inhaled shakily when his body reminded him to breathe. He wasn’t sure how long he paced in the room. Eventually, he felt like his body began moving on its own, and as he left the room, he said “I’m sorry... I love you.”
He found himself in the kitchen, opening the fridge, and pulling out an MRS, twisting the cap off and drinking it as fast as he could. The smooth, bland taste was nothing like what he was looking for, but the motion itself brought some cathartic relief. When the bottle was empty after a few seconds, he tossed the bottle near the trash and did the same to another. He then grabbed a third bottle and moved over to his chair where he selected his favorite film. At first, he had the digital window projected on the empty wall in front of him, but he found his eyes drifting away from the screen and into the reality of his shithole apartment. He flipped through his video settings and found ‘Immersive Mode’, which made the screen large enough to encompass his entire field of view, and blacked out the rest of the environment.
It was all he could do.