WEEKLY BRIEFING: CUSTODIAL ASSOCIATION - [COUNTY] SANITATION/TEAM OCTAVIA
Date: September [Week 1], 2024
Prepared by: Finnian Browne/[Junior Custodian], Barbara Lee/[Junior Custodian]
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1. UPDATES & ANNOUNCEMENTS
* Highlight 1: New Hires! We’re excited to welcome four new members to the team: Sienna Cross, Marcus DeWitt, Ellie Harper, and D’Noel Reyes.
* Please keep in mind that Marcus Dewitt comes from [Redacted] County and was born in 1999. As such, he is allergic to coffee (the caffeine specifically) as well as any intoxicants meant to stave off sleep. In his words: “I risk tea, but none that’s fancy or with any caffeine.”
* Sienna is returning to government work after a stint of contracting. She specializes in tech and robotic work, both natural and supernatural. You may find her on the hiking trails or climbing the local cliffs (Octavia has cleared this with Jamie [Supervisor]).
* Ellie is fresh to the workforce and has some peculiar habits—she comes with pets to work, as is the nature of her specialization through college. She will work alongside Finnian Browne in the dog kennel room which is being respecialized into a Natural, Supernatural and Unnatural Captivity room.
* And lastly, let’s welcome our recent companion, D’Noel Reyes, brother of Noel Reyes and son of Joanne Reyes. His intimate insights into the supernatural will be incredibly useful in the coming days.
* Let’s give them all a warm [County] welcome next week during their onboarding!
* Highlight 2: The Doppelgänger case is in its approval stages, but we have received a warrant to immediately draft D’Noel Reyes throughout the case. These cases take time to truly be finalized, so our focus will be on preparing for post-hearing procedures and possible policy changes, depending on the outcome. If any media representatives contact you, remember: “No Comment” is your best friend. You may also refer them to [County] Sanitation [Public Relations Committee].
* Highlight 3: Next Week’s mission regards the rumors of contamination from a [Diabolical] entity. They are confirmed present by the [Hunter Association], who will perform the slaying Sunday night in a joint effort with the [Church of Humanity]. See the [Chaplain] prior to Monday for prayer and confession, regardless of your religious belief. Brush up on your occult symbology. And yes, pack an extra pair of socks.
* Highlight 4: The Formation of Team Octavia! After months of informal collaboration with the majority of the team members and due to our handling of a sensitive case, we’ve been formally recognized as a specialized unit within the [Custodial Association]. This will give us more autonomy in handling complex cases such as the Doppelgänger case, as well as more unique mission assignments. Congratulations, everyone!
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2. ACHIEVEMENTS FROM LAST WEEK
* Achievement 1:Kudos to our team for successfully completing all administrative work for the Doppelgänger case on time! We have had problems with that in the past, but with the assistance of Barbara Lee and Finnian Browne, it was completed ahead of schedule and Octavia was finally able to rest for a work block (we had to force her to take a nap). A special shoutout to Finnian for catching the missing signature on Form 23-A. If that had been missed, we could’ve been delayed another two weeks.
* Achievement 2: We had a productive debrief session with the [Custodial Association’s] [Review Committee]. Octavia led the discussion, assisted by Joanne Reyes and Mason [Last Name Redacted]. Our team’s feedback on potential ethical dilemmas was well received—the [Review Committee] found humor in Mason’s comment on “printing Doppelgängers and making our own army.” We have reminded him that jokes don’t always go well with the board. They are humorless. This is not an opinion, it is factual. Their response: “The use of Doppelgängers has already been considered.” When questioned on whether it has been implemented, they refused to respond.
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3. CURRENT PRIORITIES
* Priority 1: Mission prep! This includes a thorough check of containment and janitorial equipment. Everyone should pack additional batteries into their kits. Please bring your kits to the chapel for prayer and blessing. Prior to Monday, if you see any mysterious fog or hear strange whispers at 0300, do not engage and disregard.
* Priority 2: New Hire Integration! Sienna, Marcus, Ellie, and D’Noel will go through their initial safety training later this evening and will shadow more experienced team members for the first two weeks. Ellie’s “pets” have already caused a minor stir with [Public Relations] and [Human Resources], but we are cleared her to keep them in the Natural, Supernatural, and Unnatural Containment Quarters. Reminder to everyone: this is a no hazing zone! That means not pretending that the hazmat suits have a cool-down mode requiring users to remain still for ninety minutes (this is for Barbara Lee specifically). Despite how funny it may be, please keep it safe and to a minimum.
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4. CHALLENGES
* Challenge 1: Public perception is a growing concern. Although our county is more progressive than most, the use of supernatural and unnatural entities may still cause backlash. Media attention is likely to increase, so prepare for scrutiny. Remember: Only designated spokespersons should speak to media. Direct any inquiries to Maria Loosen, our team’s designated media liaison.
* Challenge 2: We’ve had recurring issues with Type-5 Incorporeal Detectors. Three failed during a recent check. Sienna will be leading a small team to troubleshoot and fix the detectors. Anyone with expertise in equipment calibration should assist.
* Challenge 3: Scheduling! Due to the recent formation of our unit, we need to line all of our schedules up. Currently, many of us are two weeks on duty, two weeks off, or three weeks on duty, one week off. Our schedules are misaligned. A schedule realignment plan will be proposed soon, so please keep an eye on your inbox for further details. It is optional, but be aware that if a job is assigned to us and a team member’s specialty is needed, we will ask for you to extend your time for the duration of the mission.
* Challenge 4: Snack Machine in the Break Room! It is still malfunctioning. Thank you to Barbara Lee for attempting to fix it by shaking it from left to right. Please remember, no shaking the machines! Please recall the mysterious fog!
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5. ACTION ITEMS
* Joanna Reyes and Octavia Brigard: Follow up with the [University] on the condition we left it in after sanitation. Ensure there are no residual traces and verify no further contamination has been reported.
* Sienna Cross, Marcus DeWitt, Ellie Harper, D’Noel Reyes: Complete onboarding sessions. Familiarize yourselves with our procedures. Ellie, for the duration of your onboarding, no new “pets” or surprises please.
* Noel Reyes: Continue to report to St. Mary’s Hospital unless otherwise requested.
* Finnian Browne and Barbara Lee: Prepare the final logistics for next week's assignment. This includes coordinating transportation, gathering backup equipment, and ensuring all team members are briefed on the site’s risks. Thank you both for offering to relieve some of Octavia’s workload. Despite her anxiety around it, she’s excited. Disregard any opposition from her.
* Mason [Last Name Redacted] and Noel Reyes: Compile all of the post-cleanup reports for religious and occult incidents in our county dating back one decade. This information will be critical.
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6. QUESTIONS & FEEDBACK
Open Call for Suggestions: If you have any creative solutions for fixing the break room’s snack machine, we’d love to hear them. It is currently more of a “contained hazard” than a functioning source of snacks. Sienna has generously offered to share her stash of protein bars—thank you, Sienna.
Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Looking for Volunteers: If anyone is interested in working in the Natural, Supernatural, and Unnatural Containment Room, please sign up via the internal portal and notify Octavia Brigard or Finnian Browne. Thank you Ellie Harper your enthusiasm. Everyone is aware of it. Remember, all, extra hands make for light work!
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Looking ahead to next week:
Stay alert, stay safe, and let’s make sure Team Octavia continues to set the standard for excellence. Remember, Keep Thine Hands in Clay
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Thank you,
This week’s briefing was prepared by Finnian Browne and Barbara Lee