Novels2Search

Maddening sadness

Laguna - South-end - midnight - Proxy

Man, no matter how you slice it, these guys are heavy. Puck is on the lighter side, but Wedge is crushing my back. Not to mention that I have to carry both of them. Alex and the others are nearby, so that’s a silver lining. That freak, Jed, didn’t come back for seconds, and that old man left. At least I don’t have to worry about anyone trying to kill me for the time being.

“Hey, there it is!” The place everyone else is at! “I just hope they’re all on the first floor. “HEY! SOMEONE! Come, one of you come out! Need help lugging these guys around!” Fortunately, Alex is the one to come out. Thank God! “Yo, Alex, help me!”

He hurries over to me with a fire under his ass. “What is going on!? Are they okay?”

“No, we gotta get back to camp, now!”

“Okay! I will inform the others what is happening!”

“Just hurry.”

He dashes back into the building. A few seconds later, he returns with the rest of the guys.

Gil picks up Wedge, noticing his missing arm. “We need to hurry back. This wound needs to be disinfected.”

“Yeah, let’s go then!”

Not that it’s important, but Chip and Garrick are carrying some heavy bags there. Maybe they got weapons in there, or maybe… Nah, that stuff ain’t important. Right now, we just need to mend these wounds!

“Don’t worry. I won’t let you two die on me,” I mutter under my breath.

Jed got away, and if that freak is still out there, then something bad is bound to happen; my gut tells me so.

Laguna - Cade’s camp - midnight

Jed limps to the howling campfire resting in the center of the camp, filled with young boys and girls of various ages, all the way to their late teens. Jed had cleaned his blade before arriving at the camp. However, his limp is real. The injury he received from Proxy throned his body, inside and out. Even if it was a strike to the liver, the pain eats away at him; it takes every ounce of discipline for Jed not to lose his mind to the pain.

“Cade!” But that pain helps him sell that he’s been through a vicious fight. Even his breathing perfectly reflects the mood he desires to capture. “Cade!”

Cade, who was sulking near the campfire, spots Jed limping towards him. On cue, he rushes over to help him to his feet. “What happened!?”

“I was…caught in an ambush… Bandits…too many of them…”

“Bandits!? Where are they?”

“I do not know. They most likely fled… I only escaped because of Puck and Wedge.”

The name drops bring a dull feeling into Cade’s heart; a heavy, uneasy feeling akin to sinking to the darkest depths of the sea. He noticed they were missing, but now their absence sends a chill throughout his body.

“Where…where are they, Jed?”

Jed turns away from Cade, faking a pained expression. He presents him Wedge’s arm. “...Wedge begged me to flee, at the cost of his arm.”

Cade lightly takes the arm out of his hand. The air runs thin, exhausting those near him. His eyes fixate on the dismembered arm. Both hands quiver and his panicked breathing gets louder and louder as the crowd of kids close in on him. The boy wants to reject the reality in front of him, that his best friends are dead, that the last people he truly cared about met a terrible end by the bandits that he wanted to end for their sakes, but he knows it’s real.

“Wedge…Puck… You two… No…no…this…this isn’t real.”

The last few friends who he could call family are gone, and he was not there to save them, is what the boy tells himself. The final pieces of his humanity disappear, ejected with a scream. A wild, visceral cry of anger that sends shockwaves throughout the camp. Fear captures the minds of all the young boys and girls there. His Source gushes outward, leaking his immense anger, tremendous sorrow, and his bottomless despair.

The atmosphere was crippling, suffocating, and darker than the blackest parts of the moon. Tears flow from his eyes. Cade has lost a fundamental piece that all humans utilize to tell right from wrong: morality.

“Kill… We…we…we… Kill…”

No longer in control of his emotions, he continues to raise his Source volume, unintentionally reaching his limit. Pushing further beyond what he is able to draw out… But he ignores the strain pushing his limit brings… At this moment, his limit snaps, envisioning the birth of his trigger; a dagger plunging into a beating heart, causing blood to explode from the organ.

“KILL! KILL! KILL THEM ALL! I’LL MAIME THEM ALL!”

No one in the camp dares to move in front of Cade, who raves about slaughtering the bandits. Several small whimpers come from the younger kids in the camp, and even from the older ones. The shadows of two figures dance around Cade.

“KILL THEM! KILL THEM NOW! NO MORE WAITING!”

Cade’s sudden outburst took Jed by surprise, but he was quick to focus on the crowd of onlookers.

“...Everyone, the time is now! We must fight! We must avenge our fallen allies! No matter what, we must avenge them! Your sorrow, your anguish, your rage! Unleash it! LET THE BANDITS HEAR YOUR CRIES, MY FRIENDS!”

Jed’s charisma shines through, even in a turbulent time like this. Although fake, the emotions he expressed struck a chord with everyone. Cries of various emotions ring throughout the night, resonating into a jumble of voices that echo throughout the dead city.

Cade’s emotions, although suffocating, didn’t just strike fear into everyone else, but they amplified the corresponding feelings in everyone else, allowing Jed to manipulate them. But as for Jed, it doesn’t affect him at all. However, he does take delight in the scene unfolding before his very eyes.

“...It is coming! The battlefield that I dreamed of is coming!”

Beyond this point, a human being would not be the one to bring about Jed’s dream, but a devil born not of anger, but immense sadness; sadness born from a lie.

…/Gray Ocean

A silver blade whizzes past my head, barely flying past my shoulder with a bright gleam. I swear I just a few of my hair get cut off, but I guess I needed a haircut anyway. A single step forward is all I needed to close the distance. My blade gets blocked by its fist. That same fist slips off my blade, trained for my forehead. Dodgin’ it isn’t a problem, but it cut off more of my damn hair!

Pissed, I hit him with an enhanced kick.

“Hey, you dick! You wanna watch the hair! Next time you hit it, I’ll–”

A sudden, violent wave of hostility hits me, comin’ from all the way down south of this city. Puttin’ it lightly: it’s like a demon throwing all its rage at me.

“Hey…you felt that too, right?”

“So, there are strong Source-users among these people still.”

“Still?”

“No matter, this fight is far from over!”

“Come on, man. Can you at least let a guy catch a break?”

“Enough! Raise your–”

“Now, now, mr. knight. Your little dance has come to an end; be gracious and bow out.”

A second Source-user pops up. Compared to this other I just felt, she’s got hers refined, keeping it under control instead of flexing it like some amateur. Its color is as pale as the moon, but as clear during a cloudless night and when the moon is at its brightest. Her small body floats in the air. Probably using air to keep herself afloat. Her heels touch the ground, all delicate-like.

“...A pleasure to meet you, mr. swordsman.”

“Name’s Gray Ocean, and you are…?”

“Selena.”

I sure have been runnin’ into a bunch of brats lately… Don’t tell me this is some sort of sign sayin’ that I’m old or somethin’? Man, I’m still too damn young to be seen as a father figure!

“Hey, where are your parents, kid?” I ask, rubbing the back of my head to relieve my headache.

“Do you mean to patronize me, or do you wish to anger me?” she poses a threatening question at me, glaring at me with a slightly irritated look.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to patronize ya. You kids nowadays are more snappy .”

Her face went serious, practically sayin’ “another word, and you’re gonna get it”. Eh, this whole side conversation is distracting anyway.

“...Whoever that is, he’s likely a B-2, perhaps B-1,” she states without a hint of hesitation.

She’s familiar with the Source Metric System? Well, that’s surprising. Not that she’s wrong. Though, this feeling is familiar…

“So that brat couldn’t stop himself.”

Guess that means he’s willin’ to fall into his bloodlust. Not that it’s my problem. Whatever happens here is none of my concern. But still, is he really gonna throw caution to the wind like that? Usin’ Source the way he was earlier is only gonna get him cooked.

Selena turns back around, facing me with a curious expression. “...Ignoring that, may I ask why you are here?”

“You know of his intentions, witch!”

“Speak when you are spoken to,” she bites back, hitting him with a cold-ass remark. “...Now, swordsman, speak of your intentions.”

Lying doesn’t sound like a good idea, and with this knight’s temper, not to mention this chick, I doubt it’ll end well for me. Oh well, might as well lay all of my cards on the table.

“Okay, okay, I getcha. I’ll tell you why.” My sword makes a clinking sound when I slipped it back into its sheathe. “I was hired to come and nab a book.”

“Do you know what this book is?”

“Not exactly, but I know it’s a Mystica.”

“Is that the extent of your knowledge?”

“Yeah, that’s all I know.”

My answer gets the kid to ponder for a moment before returning her attention to me. “...Were there others instructed to come here?”

“I dunno?”

Selena, disappointed by my lackluster answer, groans. “Are you sure?”

“Yep. I mean, makes sense when I never got to see who I work for.”

“You haven’t seen his face?”

Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.

“I was hired via a proxy, and I never even got to see that guy's face.”

Right away, she heads back to her thoughts. Though, this time, she’s mutterin’ to herself. “...Why now? Why allow new elements to enter this place? I cannot see the purpose behind it.”

She’s off in her own little world. This might be my chance to sneak off while I can. Nice and quiet like…

“You, Gray Ocean was it?”

My foot sticks to the ground, catching me in an awkward position. “Y-yes!”

“...Allow me to ask you a question.”

“Shoot.”

“Would you rather work for me?”

Huh?

“Huh?”

“Was I not clear? Come work for me, and don’t fret about payment; I am a cordial lady, after all.”

“Seriously!? But I don’t know. I’m not the type to switch sides mid-game, you know?”

“Then, in that case, allow me to provide a reason other than material desires…”

Laguna - Fire-wraith outpost - Midnight - Wildcard

The sound of the tree branches whistles in my ear. Relaxing on top of the tree that proudly stands in the middle of this city that’s surrounded by water. It’s a clear symbol of nature’s everlasting presence, even in the face of war. The only reason I’m even here in this shithole is ‘cause I didn’t want Scar’s dumbass plan to destroy this tree.

I hate even being near other members of the bandits. For starters, most of them are idiots taking advantage of the fact they’re with us. Second, rarely any of them are good at fighting, and third, none of them show a lick of respect for nature.

Of course, when I say respect, I mean understanding that we humans are guests on this land, so we have to respect its laws, as well as its sanctity. When you hunt for food, you do it out of respect for your prey, and consume it, knowing full well you took a life to sustain your own. It sounds wrong, but that is the natural order of nature; a predator will hunt prey not just for game, but for its own life.

No one in this damn group understands that, so they just go in and kill animals all nilly-willy without an ounce of respect. It ain’t like I’m gonna tell them off for it; it would be a waste of time.

“Dumb bastards. Each of them pisses me off.”

The only reason I even tagged along with the Fire wraiths was so that they wouldn’t just go destroying whatever greenery they can find, or just kill creatures only for them to rot somewhere. Other than that, I don’t give a crap about these guys. I’d rather just be doing my own thing right about now.

“It’s a pain, but I ain’t gonna let anyone hurt you, big guy.” I gently rub the bark below me.

Then, out of the blue, an instinctual feeling alerts me to something ominous coming from the south end of the city. It was brief, but it was gut-wrenching, not to mention bloodcurdling.

“What was…”

There are beasts out in the wilds that can tell when something dangerous is approaching, and I spent all my life fighting beasts like those, developing those instincts. Right now, it’s going off like crazy.

Laguna - Anti-bandit camp - midnight - Proxy

We got back to camp with Puck and Wedge. I sat next to him, watching him sleep. Doctor Crow treated him, disinfecting his wound and all that. Zell was unable to do anything more. It’s not like I expected him to pull a miracle out of his ass and bring back Wedge’s arm. Zell explicitly said that no matter how much he tries, his healing can’t reverse irreversible damage like destroyed organs, torn-off limbs, or death; Richard has that same limit.

“Wedge… I’m sorry that I couldn’t save you sooner.”

“Don’t apologize, Proxy.”

Taking a seat next to me, Puck keeps her attention on Wedge.

“Puck… Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Only a headache and that’s it.”

“You should go lie down then.”

“I’m fine. Not like I’m gonna die or anything.”

As tough as ever. Glad to see she’s doing well.

“I’m sorry, Puck. I couldn’t be there–”

“Shut up.” Her bitter response makes me bite my lip. Shame builds up in my chest. “...You showed up when you did, and we’re still alive, thanks to you.”

“Yeah…”

Speaking of saving them, why did they even need to be saved in the first place?

“Why was Jed trying to kill you guys, and why was that old man there?”

“He’s working with the bandits.”

“But why? Isn’t he working with you guys?”

“I don’t know. But if I’m being honest, he was always suspicious, even when we first met.”

“How did you find that creep?”

“We didn’t, he found us.” Definitely suspicious. “...When Cade saw him in action, he made him one of us on the spot.” She scoffs. “‘One of us’, yeah right! He was never like us, never in his life, or on mine!”

“Sucks to be him then. Being one of you guys rocks… At least, it used to be.”

Puck turns her attention back to Wedge, oddly more relaxed. “...You still are.”

“What?”

She puts her left on the other one’s lap. “I don’t think Cade hated you, even after our battle. As a matter of fact, he was depressed the day after.”

“Really?”

“This is just what I observed, so don’t let it get to your head.” You say that, but how can I not let it get to my head? “Whenever someone mentions you, he would just clam up for a second before hand-waving your name out of mind. But I think it meant what happened hurt him, but it wasn’t enough to make him hate you; he probably wished you chose us instead.”

I…never thought that. Cade’s name always made me feel guilty. It always reminded me of all the mistakes I made back then, and how I couldn’t help everyone.

“I’m sorry, but I couldn’t. You guys hurt the people I cared about back then, so there was no way I could do that.”

“You’re right, and I know saying sorry isn’t going to alleviate that.”

“...But, I wish I could’ve talked Cade down, found another way to settle things without anyone getting hurt. I should’ve been the one to do that! It needed to be me, but I was too stupid to realize that!”

She puts her hand in front of my face. Her finger flicks my forehead.

“Ow! What the hell was that for!?”

“Stop doing that!”

“Doing what?”

“Putting the blame on yourself, you idiot!” She keeps flicking my head without relent or mercy. “...Cade always does that; blaming himself for everything, even if it isn’t his fault! My parents dying, Wedge’s brother, and his parents' death too! He thinks he could have saved them all, but he can’t! No one could! It pisses me off when he does, and you’re pissing me off right now, too!”

“Okay, okay! I get it, I get it!”

“No, you don’t…!” Her attacks end. A downcast smile breaks through her angered expression. “Wedge does it too; thinking he could have saved his brother, and so do I. We all want to blame ourselves, to make sense of all the bad things in our lives, but that doesn’t make any of us feel better, or somehow fixes what happened.”

“It doesn’t…?”

A warm smile etches across her face. “When you came along, I didn’t like you.”

“Did I do something?”

“You were annoying.”

“I…I wasn’t–.”

“...loud, childishly energetic.”

“Hey!”

“...and you were proud of being a misfit; it almost made me think you were a bandit.”

“Now you’re just hurting my feelings, damnit!”

“...But, whenever you were around, Cade and everyone else would cheer up. No matter where I went back in the old hideout, everyone was beaming.” And here I thought everyone over there was just naturally happy. “...Even Cade had a genuine smile when you were around.”

“He wore a fake smile?”

“Again, this is what I observed!”

“Okay, but I already know you like Cade, so–” She holds back her middle finger with her thumb. “H-hey! I didn’t mean anything by it! It’s just…you know… You watching Cade isn’t so far-fetched.” Her finger hits me dead-center on my forehead. “Ow!”

“The point is this: We’ll always think of you as one of us, no matter what, so stop blaming yourself, dumbass!”

The pain pressing against my forehead disappears. A delightful sense of warmth builds inside of me from how blunt, yet honest, she is… I’ve been an idiot. Here I am, blaming myself for everything to feel better. So stupid, so ridiculous.

“Thank you, Puck. You, Cade, Wedge, and everyone else back at your camp, I want to help them!”

I’m not smart, stupid even sometimes, but Ocean was right. The only one who can find the solution I want is myself. But I’m not just gonna save Cade, I’m gonna help Alex, get Marie out of her slump, and beat the shit out of the bandits! So what if it all seems naive? I don’t care! With all my power, I’ll do it! But I won’t be alone…

“Puck, we’re gonna save Cade and everyone else!”

“You don’t need to tell me!”

“Sweet! First, we’re gonna need help. My friends will-”

Suddenly, hitting me like a cricket bat to the head, a dreadful pressure hits me. The hairs on the back of my neck stand, goosebumps run down my arms, and a chill crawls down my spine. What the hell is this? It’s almost like that body-snatcher, but with an ungodly amount of anger behind it.

“What’s wrong, Proxy?”

Looks like Puck doesn’t notice.

“I feel something…something awful. Like a bunch of needles are pricking my skin.”

“Seriously!?” Why is she looking all surprised? Does she know what this is? “...Proxy, there’s something I have to tell you about Cade.”

“What?”

“He’s changed, for the worse. It’s like, there’s this terrifying energy coming from him. Breathing gets hard around him, and–”

“...And one wrong move around him feels like instant death, right?”

“How do you know that?”

“We had a similar situation a couple of days ago.”

Does that mean Cade can use Source? But how the hell can he? Was he trained by someone? Jed doesn’t strike me as the type to have unnatural abilities. Damnit, I wish Richard was here to explain all this. Either way, I’m gonna have to confront him.

“Of course,” Puck, out of nowhere, exclaims, shooting up to her feet. “Proxy, where did Jed go!?”

“Um, he escaped by using the rooftops”

“Did he leave with that bandit?”

“No, they went their own ways.”

“Then… Proxy, we have to get back to Cade!”

She runs off without me, leaving me nothing short of confused.

“Hey, what’s going on!?”

“Jed, I think he went back to our camp!”

“Wait, hold up, why!? What’s the point of that?”

“Only me and Wedge suspected him, Cade and everyone else thought he was one of us. So when he gets there, he’ll make it seem like the three of us were attacked and he’s the only one who survived!”

“Seriously!? That’ll send Cade off the deep end!”

“I know! That’s why we need to go back!”

Then we have no time to mess around! If we’re gonna book it, then we’re gonna need RoadBurner. Whistling from the top of my lungs, it rolls into the camp by itself. Everyone ignores the bike riding itself like it’s just another normal fact of life.

“How did you do that?” Puck, with her mouth hanging open, asks.

“What can I say? I just rock around in style.”

“More like you keep getting weirder.”

“What can I say? I’m unordinary!”

…/Richard

A horrifically familiar pressure came from here. A bunch of kids, older, younger, or as old as me, scurry about the campsite, grabbing weapons and strapping on armor for various parts of their bodies. The emotions building around the camp is oppressively bleak. Anger erodes the area like thick murky mud in a swamp. Anger like this is new to me; if I was new to reading their words, then I would have folded from the sheer intensity. Even though I am used to feeling emotions like this, shivers run down my body.

“Master,” Nunnalé calls, planting her hand on my shoulder. “Please stand back and allow me to scout the area for you.”

“No, no, I’m okay. Thank you for your concern.”

We already know who we’re looking for, so as soon as we spot him and confirm what the situation is, we’ll retreat.

“Everyone’s Source is barely visible,” I comment, scanning the area for Cade.

“The fewer Source-users, the better our odds become.”

“You’re right. But do you think Cade could have emitted such a monstrous pressure?” I ask, hoping for her to tell me no.

“I am unable to confirm, however, knowing that he is a Source-user, it may be likely.”

“Yeah, well, I just hope it won’t end up like last time.”

“Do you mean…?”

“I don’t know Cade all that well, but Proxy does, so I just hope we can avoid a fight.”

I know better than to hope for an easy out. Something like that won’t come just from me begging for it; wishing for stuff like that is a waste, but I can’t help myself.

“Nunnalé, if we have to get into a fight, you’ll be the main offense, while I try to find objects to throw.”

“Understood.”

That’s still no good. In a fight with a Source-user, we need a better plan than just me throwing rocks while she does all the fighting. But what else is there for me to do besides that? I’m a rank amateur when it comes to Source. There’s something missing in my use of it, but I can’t figure it out… Maybe I’m just incompetent.

“Master! Cade is in sight!”

Her statement tears me away from my thoughts. A single look at him is all I needed to confirm our suspicions. An awful, muddy, black Source, oozing off of him like ink, surges around him. It radiates a dreadful presence that reminds my body of what that body snatcher’s Source was like. Oddly enough, his Source isn’t mired in malicious delight, but unbridled rage and a sorrow too deep for words.

“Did…does he have a trigger?”

The thought alone makes my skin crawl.

“Perhaps, however, that alone is not worrisome.”

“Then what is?”

“It’s whether he has a technique or not.”

“A technique?”

“Yes, a Source technique. These are usually unique abilities created by Source-users.”

“So, like those shadows from the body snatcher.”

“Affirmative, however, that’s just an example of a technique. If Cade were to have one, we must be extremely cautious.”

A technique… If I had one, then maybe I wouldn’t be as useless in a fight.

“Nunnalé, how do you– Wha…!

My heart pounds against my chest, threatening to jump right out. Even though we’re about 100 meters away, Cade’s sight falls on us. He throws all his killing intent at us.

“Master!”

“How the hell did he spot us!?”

He disappears in the blink of an eye. Nunnalé immediately throws me back, following right behind me. Cade appears in the spot we were standing on. His figure darkened under his Source, a knife gleamed in his hand, left unaffected.

“I remember you two… You’re with that bandit woman… I’ll…” Nunnalé brings out her blade and moves to protect me from Cade. “...All of you…scum of the world…each and every one of you…” He points his blade at us, ready to kill us at a moment’s notice, “...I’ll get rid of all of you scum!”