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Soulscapes of Aluria: Ashes to Ashes
12 - What's Done Is Done

12 - What's Done Is Done

  Viktor woke up in a cold sweat, eyes darting to and fro as he tried to figure out where he was. Last he remembered his right hand was just removed and cauterized in seconds. He very quickly shifted into confusion as he noticed he was apparently in his home, having fallen asleep in the living room chair in front of the lit fireplace.

  He removed the blanket from himself, sighing wistfully as he noticed it was the one Avalia had made him for their first anniversary. He still couldn’t believe she’d spent over a week making something for him. It was slightly scratchy because she couldn’t afford the best material, but it was more than enough for him.

  After a moment’s hesitation he looked down at his hands, sighing in relief as he saw both hands were perfectly intact. Even his wedding band was in near mint condition, causing him to smile. Avalia had been so worried his ring was permanently stained by a metal paint he’d gotten on it at work, but just look at it now. It was practically glowing.

  He got out of the chair with an audible sigh, feeling several joints pop and click in disagreement. He ignored them entirely, fully focused on going to the kitchen to see his wife. He still had a chance to get her back, to change her mind about him. Maybe she wasn’t actually pregnant yet and it was just one big nightmare. He surely showed her how much he loved her and found her attractive in reality, didn’t he? Of course he did, she was his wife after all.

  He knocked on the kitchen archway as he walked in, causing Avalia to yelp as she dropped an empty pan and letting it clatter to the floor. Viktor winced as he knew what that meant, but he didn’t care. Viktor made sure to walk up behind her and embrace her before she had a chance to yell at him about being in the kitchen.

  “What’s the occasion? I didn’t forget your birthday or something, did I?” Avalia had a smirk on her face, knowing full well she hadn’t forgotten anything.

  “Oh you didn’t know? It’s national ‘Love Your Wife’ day. That means that today is all about you, just you, and no one else but you. Now what can your awful husband do for you?” He embraced her even tighter as he spoke, giving her a peck on the cheek for good measure.

  “Well, you can start by picking up that dirty pan and washing it, kind sir.” She gently pulled herself from his arms and gestured towards the pan on the floor as though she were holding a door open.

  “As you wish, milady. I aim to please.” Viktor tried his best to hide his slight drawl as he gave her the classiest smile he could while bowing, picking up the pan while he was down there.

  Viktor walked over to the sink and turned on the faucet, not for the first time wondering just how these worked. He remembered guarding the building where they ensured the sewage and water was running, but other than something about gems it was beyond him what went on. He shrugged the thought away as he picked up a towel and began drying off the pan. He then put it away and dried his own hands with the same towel.

  It was at that moment that he began to hyperventilate slightly, his eyes filled with horror. For on his wrist was a small piece of skin missing where there wasn’t before. He tried his best to rationalize it before he went into a full-blown panic. Maybe it was just from something in the week that freaked him out. He was an emotional person after all, it wasn’t unlikely. Or maybe he’d hurt himself while on the job, it was dangerous after all.

  It could’ve been any one of those things, possibly even more he couldn’t think of. He was fine. His relationship was fine and his wife still loved him. He loved her. She was attractive to him. She was a beautiful woman that he couldn’t get enough of. He especially loved her… He thought her prettiest feature was…

  He whirled around and stared at his wife, currently preoccupied with putting away dishes. He couldn’t believe his eyes. She looked so… unattractive to him at that moment. It was genuinely at a level where he couldn’t understand how anyone found her attractive. As he thought this, the smell of cinnamon wafted into his nose, forcing him to cover it with both hands.

  “A-Ava darling, what’s that smell?”

  “What smell, sweetheart?” Avalia was looking at him with confusion plain on her face.

  Viktor walked around smelling the air looking for the source. His heart sank as he knew where it was coming from. He got closer to Avalia and smelled the air around her, nearly vomiting as he did. He quickly backed away, nearly falling over the counter in the middle of the kitchen.

  “St-stay back, Ava. I don’t know what it is, but you stink of cinnamon! D-did you buy a perfume or something?”

  “Perfume? Viktor you know perfumes don’t agree with my allergies, I’m not wearing anything. And I haven’t been around any cinnamon, you’ve gone mad.” She tried walking towards him as she said this, her soothing voice jarring with the monster he saw in front of him.

  Viktor quickly scrambled over the center counter to the other side of the kitchen. He didn’t know what that beast’s plans were, but he wouldn’t allow it anywhere near him.

  “Stay back you beast! Don’t come any closer.” He pulled a knife from the drawer nearest him as he screamed at her, hands quaking.

  But once he looked up, the beast was gone. All that was in its place was his wife, perhaps a bit homely but definitely no beast. What she was, however, was crying.

  He quickly dropped the knife as he approached her. “Ava, I-I’m so sorry, I don’t know what came over me. I-I thought-”

  “Thought what? That your horrendous beast of a wife was going to attack you? I can assure you, I have no reason to want to be anywhere near you.” She ran away crying as she said so, the bedroom door slamming in the distance.

  Viktor stood there for a moment, unsure what to do. He swore it was real, the hideous monster with the stench of cinnamon still fresh in his mind. But it wasn’t, was it? His mind was still reeling from the nightmare before, that’s what it was. Subconsciously he reached down to pinch his wrist, gasping as he retracted his hand in pain.

  He looked down in shock at the disgusting swelling on his wrist. It was clearly infected and even looked to be spreading; the pus under the surface was all the way to his mid-forearm. He shook his head and looked down again. All that remained was the same small mark from before. He shuddered in fear, hesitant to see what other tricks his mind might play on him.

  He sighed and began making his way to his bedroom. He still needed to apologize for the other trick his mind played on him. He sincerely hoped it would stop happening.

  He knocked on the door to their bedroom before calling out gently. “Ava?”

  “Go away, there’s only beasts in here.” She was clearly crying as she said this, causing Viktor to wince.

  He tried the doorknob, but it was unsurprisingly locked.

  “Ava, please let me in. It was a misunderstanding. I had a nightmare and my mind is still playing tricks on me.”

  “Shut up! I don’t care, it doesn’t change the fact that you’ll never look at me like Gunther does!” Viktor then heard a muffled slap, like the sound of her covering her mouth.

  Gunther? So she already left him for Shavoss? He was too late. He could feel his mind unravel as his nightmare started becoming reality. He could suddenly hear faint moaning behind the door, growing louder with each moment. He covered his ears as it clearly sounded like she was having sex with someone.

  “Oh Gunther, yes! Say it again. Keep going!”

  “You’re amazing. I’ve never seen anyone like you! Cosmic, I love you!”

  Viktor ran away from the door, pressing his hands into his ears until it hurt. Yet he could still hear it as if he was in the room with them. He tried kicking his front door open, not daring to move his hands, but it wouldn’t budge even slightly. That caught him off guard, considering even a hard push could force that crappy door open.

  He then ran to the living room window, but paused before he jumped into it. Outside were Shavoss, Avalia, and a little girl no older than 5 he didn’t recognize all playing together. They were spraying each other with a tubeless gemhose, an unbelievably expensive appliance they could never afford on his salary.

Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  “I’m going to get you, Cornelia!” Avalia was chasing around behind the girl with her hands miming claws.

  “Eek! Daddy, help me! The scary monster’s going to get me!” The little girl was giggling as she shouted, waving her arms above her head like noodles while she ran.

  Shavoss then sprayed Avalia down with the hose, causing her to stop in her tracks as she hissed. He walked up to her while spraying her, then stopping and dropping the hose.

  “The monster has been stopped! And now a kiss to turn her back.” He then twirled her on her feet and kissed her passionately before looking into her eyes. “There’s my beautiful wife.”

  Avalia was blushing a deep red, accenting her soaking wet brown hair and button nose. They were suddenly interrupted when Cornelia sprayed them both with the gemhose.

  “Ew, stop kissing! Bleh!” The little girl put on the best pout she could before she started giggling again. Shavoss had picked her up sideways and was blowing into her belly button.

  Viktor ran away from the window, tears blurring his vision as he ran into the kitchen. He stopped as he felt himself bounce against nothing, falling backwards onto his hands and butt. He shook his head and stood up, the scene in front of him becoming clearer.

  “Um, Gunther. I have news.” Avalia was looking down at her feet, her hands behind her back.

  “What is it, pet? Can it wait? I’m almost done with dinner.” Shavoss hadn’t looked up from the pan he was searing vegetables in, his face soaked in sweat with a focused yet casual expression.

  “Not necessarily.” At that she held up a small blue strip in front of Shavoss, which he looked down at after a moment.

  Realization gradually dawned on his face, a toothy grin stretching across his face. “Wait, really? A son?! I’m going to have a son?!” Shavoss dropped his stirring spoon in the pan, instead embracing Avalia next to him. “You’ve made me such a happy man, pet.”

  Avalia had tears streaming down her cheeks, an equally big smile stretching from ear to ear. Wrinkles from frequent smiles became more defined at the corners of her eyes. She hesitantly pulled herself from his arms, clearly not wanting to leave his arms.

  “Cornelia, come here please!” She walked over to the kitchen archway, leaning out as she called down the hall.

  A child of about 11 slowly came walking down the hall. She had the same brown eyes as Avalia, but they were closer to Shavoss in their large size. Her high cheeks reminded him of Shavoss, yet the pudginess was clearly Avalia. She had her brown hair in a braided crown which she was almost finished putting together. Her skin had clearly gone the more sunkissed route of Shavoss as opposed to Avalia’s paleness, and scratches could be seen along her legs from frequent active play.

  “What is it Mom? Is dinner ready, because it smells like it’s burned.” The little girl had a cheeky grin as she could clearly see Avalia’s embarrassment.

  She walked right by Viktor as if he wasn’t there, sitting at the center counter and continuing to braid her hair.

  “Oops, I totally forgot! Pet, you tell her while I try to salvage this.” Shavoss quickly turned back to the pan, doing his best to quench a small fire that had started.

  “Cornelia, I just want you to know that me and your dad love you very much and nothing will change that. With that in mind… You’re going to have a little brother!” Avalia tensed up as she said this, awaiting Cornelia’s response.

  “So… does that mean you won’t get mad at me anymore?” Cornelia had a curious expression on her face, as though she were deep in thought.

  “What do you mean? Have we been too harsh with you?” Avalia appeared concerned by Cornelia’s statement.

  “Well, you always get mad at me for having so many scratches and bruises from climbing. With a boy around though, he’ll be way worse! You won’t even notice me!” Cornelia adopted the same cheeky grin as before, clearly pleased with her sound logic.

  Avalia and Gunther both laughed as they heard this, while Cornelia looked at them both slightly offended.

  Suddenly the kitchen archway grew dark, hiding the scene from Viktor’s view. He shook his head and walked off, his eyes puffy and tired from crying. He walked over to the back door, no longer able to muster the energy to run anywhere. As he walked, the hallway leading backwards grew longer and longer. Open doors started to fade into being on either side as he walked, each one showing a different, yet just as painful, event.

  In one doorway he could see Cornelia holding her baby brother as they sat in front of the fireplace. In another he saw the boy, now around 5, running around with a small book as Cornelia chased after him with an angry expression. In another he saw they had adopted a stray Riesin, one of its rear paws missing and its mouse-like ears covered in bite marks. In another he saw the boy around 7 riding the grown Riesin around the house, his face full of joy. In yet another he saw an older man with a striking resemblance to Shavoss visiting their home.

  Viktor’s gradual walk sped up into a jog until it broke into a sprint as he no longer bothered looking in the doorways. Not like it mattered, his mind still being assaulted with events as they forced themselves in regardless. Sad moments like the old man’s funeral, happy moments like the Riesin having a litter. The children grew older, as did Shavoss and Avalia. The children had children, happily bringing them to their childhood home. Shavoss retired from the military, spending every day with Avalia. Eventually Avalia grew sick, and she lay bedridden. Every door after that was day by day of Shavoss caring for her, sitting by her bed, or speaking with a doctor. In every door Avalia continued having a smile, regardless of how far she deteriorated.

  Finally came her funeral, with Shavoss sitting at the very front with his children and grandchildren. Tears were streaming down his face, yet he was giving a small smile. He gave her everything she could’ve ever wanted and he knew that. Viktor knew that as well, lingering for a long time at her funeral’s door.

  After a long moment Viktor tore himself away from the door, walking up to the only remaining door. The door to the garden, which looked decrepit with age yet clearly still saw care. He stood in front of it for a good long while before he reached for it with his left hand. He didn’t need to look to know he was missing the right.

  He opened the door to the garden and took the first step into the fading blue light of the sun. It was always so beautiful the way it perfectly set on the garden, and he had frequently caught Avalia standing there watching it. Now, a gravestone stood where she normally would, with a rocking chair to its left. In it sat an old man with wispy gray hair, a far cry from the luscious full blonde hair of his youth.

  Viktor walked around to the opposite side of the gravestone and stood there, watching the sunset with the old man. He idly rubbed his hand along the top of the grave, its gray stone cool to the touch. The old man suddenly cleared his throat, causing Viktor to look over at him.

  “Are you ready?” Shavoss’s normally rich voice had faded into a gravelly imitation, yet it still held the same amount of dignity.

  “Ready for what?” Viktor didn’t need to ask to know what was coming next.

  Wordlessly, Shavoss held up a small lockbox that had clearly seen better years. The wood was rotted through at multiple points, weak enough even a slight press would cause it to cave in. Its hinges were rusty enough he didn’t think there was any way it would open. And yet the dials for the combination were pristine, as though they had been held in an immutable stasis until that moment.

  Viktor reached over and put the combination in, not able to hold it while doing so anymore. As soon as the combination was in place and he pushed the button, the box crumbled to dust, leaving behind only a spiritgun. He picked it up as he wiped away tears, making his way over to stand in front of Shavoss.

  “We don’t have to do this, Captain. I can walk away and these happy memories can still exist.”

  “It’s too late for regrets, Viktor. And please, call me Gunther. I haven’t been called Captain in years.”

  “Cap-... Gunther, I… I didn’t know. I didn’t know how happy you would make her. I never loved her the way you did.”

  “Do it, Viktor.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  “You don’t have a choice anymore. You already made this decision.”

  “Please don’t make me! She can still be happy!” Viktor held the revolver up to Gunther’s chest, finger off the trigger.

  “These memories already don’t exist. Accept that fact.”

  “I’m sorry, Avalia.”

  “DO IIIT!”

  Viktor pulled the trigger, and the world around him began spinning. Memories began swirling around him before fading to dust. He fell to his knees as the swirling began to grow louder, each memory audible all at once. They slowly grew louder and faster until everything became a screeching blur, forcing him to close his eyes and cover his ears.

  Eventually it became a dull roar, then a quiet breeze, and finally silence. Nothing was happening around him, and yet he feared opening his eyes. Opening his eyes meant accepting the nothing he left behind.

  After what felt like hours, Viktor finally opened his eyes.

Status

Name: Viktor Morigold

Race: Neuman

Class: Pathless

Spirit: 0

Attributes

Strength 3

Constitution 1

Endurance 1

Agility 4

Reaction 2

Clarity 2

Perception 3

Skills

N/A