I wasn't terribly surprised to find that Susie was particularly grumpy about being forced to wait around a little longer; apparently, she had gotten rid of most of her supply of junk items while playing around with Enhancement Sage, and the God's Tower didn't have a full-featured communications center for her to buy items off the marketplace. That, in the end, led to us having a nice conversation with the priestess of Kalamitus who was waiting around the temple, about whether or not it would be safe for Louise and I if Susie just peaced out.

The Priestess was nice enough. She was the same priestess who'd been around from the moment we showed up. After listening to the question she gave kind of a sad smile.

"It's possible to directly leave the dungeon from a God's Tower, yes," she said, with a kind of regretful sound to her voice that suggested to me that a lot of people were inconvenienced by not knowing this fact. "If our Lord gives you a token, you can re-enter the Dungeon directly to the Tower as well."

Boy, wouldn't that have been helpful. You know, maybe when I got the quest to come here in the first place? I didn't comment but didn't try to keep my face calm, either, so I'm sure my discontent with the flying dragon dick upstairs was obvious.

Susie didn't seem to care, much. "Is that how you Priestesses get in and out? I can't imagine you stay here full time."

"Our Lord... and the other Dungeon Gods, I suppose, have fewer restrictions when dealing with Priestesses than normal Dungeoneers. He can move us into and between Towers easily; we act as his eyes, ears, and voice in the wider world, especially while he remains sealed." She glanced at me, and I wondered just how much of what I knew, she knew, and vice versa. For that matter, had either of us been lied to? For all that Priestesses could detect lies, maybe that didn't work on their patrons. She looked away quickly enough. "The towers are all pretty much the same, though. You can only really tell where you are by going outside; they don't even have windows."

Considering the outside of this tower was amidst a war in a frost world on the side of a magma-bottom crevice, I wasn't sure windows were really a good idea, but I could also understand the sentiment. In every apartment I'd ever had, I'd eventually wanted and needed to crack the windows and get some fresh air, and not just for the smell. There was something stuffy about indoor air, even filtered and circulated, and it just got to you eventually.

"So no matter what, if I leave, these two will be able to get out of the Dungeon safely." Susie didn't need more than a nod from the priestess before turning to the two of us and offering a hand to shake. "Alright, then, I'm out. Jerry, Louise, been a pleasure. If you get new stuff about crafting, or when you're ready to go beat down the asshole in Armand Bayou, let me know, otherwise... I'll be around." She gave a vague salute, and then turned to the Priestess. "So how do I exit?"

The Priestess led her away, and Louise considered things quietly for a few minutes, before sighing and leaning against me. "I should probably go back, too," she said, with regret in her voice. "I want to stay with you, but I have to worry about my daughter--"

"I know." I had been worrying about Louise's schedule, since we had blocked out a specific length of time to be in the Dungeon without knowing for sure how long it was going to take. "Do you need money?"

Louise leaned away from me and gave me a look. "No, Jerry, I'm okay."

"I didn't..." I sighed. "I mean, I don't have a good way to sell off the Dungeon Loot here, and I wasn't sure if you were counting on that."

"No, I'll be okay. Later, maybe." Louise frowned. "It doesn't have to be now. It's early afternoon now--" I tended to forget that the Dungeon interface had a clock, since it wasn't on one of the main pages, "--and by this evening I should probably go, but we have some time."

Given Kalamitus' request for time, that seemed to be suggesting I would go back to him after Louise left, unless I got a return pass or whatever and escorted her out. That was fine, although given how we were kind of stuck in the tower, that didn't leave us with a lot to do except be together. Although...

I considered it silently for a long moment, and then made an inquiry with the Priestess as soon as she came back. When we were given permission, I led Louise to the elevator and from there to the Tower's basement. It was a little bit of a gamble, but I had to imagine given my experiences with them that the Fairy on duty wasn't going to be a stickler for rules.

It was, of course, the same gangster with anime hair as before; he'd been there when I came back, too. And although he seemed surprised at the request, it didn't take him more than a moment to open the door and move the black silk elevator out of the way.

That left Louise and I standing on the edge of a platform looking out over the abyss, and I heard her suck in a breath, and felt her step closer to me.

It was beautiful, in a way, I reflected as I looked out, but it was also terrifying. It was one think to think of the gap as a window, but when you looked out and saw other dungeon pieces hanging in nothingness, it made it pretty clear that our own little tower was also not resting on top of anything. For tons of rock and who knows what else to just sit there on top of nothing at all... it was terrifying to consider the prospect that whatever magic supported us would just fail and we'd fall into the star below.

Louise's hand tightened on my arm, and I slipped back into telepathy with her like I was slipping an arm around her, comfortably matching her. Is this really real? Her mental voice had a deep fear to it, but also a profound wonder.

Every sense I have says it is. I can feel things out there just like I can see them, and I don't think they went out of their way to disguise it all.

Louise looked out in various directions for a good ten, fifteen minutes before she dared really pay attention to what was below us. I didn't blame her; even though I'd taken the time to study it before, I wasn't immune to vertigo, and the Star beneath us had to be far larger than earth-sized, a chained ball of destruction that defied all human understanding. I held Louise tightly when she inched closer to the edge to look more directly down, but I doubted either of us was going to fall unless someone pushed us.

This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.

It really must be a star, she agreed with my earlier assessment. It's so far away and still so large, so full of energy, and... I sensed a flicker of confusion, and looked at her as her eyes drifted away from the star. What are those?

She was looking at one of the bits of non-dungeon whatever hanging in the void, from what I could tell. I shrugged. I don't know. Harry mentioned studying ruins at some point, when we were talking about... hm. Fairy stuff, I guess. Maybe other people mounted an expedition to one of those things?

Why would they keep... do you think they're from previous civilizations?

Either that or scrapped pieces of dungeon, but then, why strip them of the--I mean, the stone layer that's on top of all the rest? I didn't really know what to call it, though mentally I considered it 'bedrock', the stuff I couldn't sense through.

I guess... I just wonder if... Louise shook her head. It's scary to think that the last of humanity might be trapped in this place like the fairies are, unable to escape and just slowly dying out...

"Let's not think about that," I interrupted, suddenly very nervous.

I could sense the Fairy at the desk behind us suddenly shift when I spoke out loud, either wondering if the words were meant for him or just surprised. It's not like I cared, I just... felt a little conspicuous, I guess. I guess that did tell me that he probably wasn't able to somehow listen in on our telepathy, not that we were telling anti-fairy secrets or anything.

Louise just nodded, looking out over the darkness, like a night sky with much larger, and much fewer, stars. If you become an Administrator... I suppose you'll be hanging out there, making new Dungeons that will hang in this sky like all the rest.

I also wasn't entirely sure I wanted to think about that, for a lot of reasons. I suppose in a way it's symbolic, I replied, nervously. The Dungeons couldn't exist without the Lord Beneath and the Star. If it ever decided to destroy these things, all it would have to do is stop holding them up.

That seems like a bad way to destroy things.

I shrugged. Sure. But when you're thinking about why they do it... it does seem like that kind of power trip.

Louise looked around for a while, and then back down. I suppose they could all technically be in orbit. Would we even know if we were moving?

I considered that. Astronauts are in zero-G, though, and I think it takes power to keep them up there.

Not as much power as it takes to hold them up above a star with magic.

I shrugged. I don't know, Louise. I just don't know.

Louise looked at me sidelong for a moment as we stood there, then reached out with her own arm and pulled me closer. You could... I mean, you don't have to call me...

I recognized where her thoughts were headed before she found a way to say them that she liked. You want a nickname? Honey-bunch? Sweetums? I stepped in closer as she started blushing a little, and I could tell that a more genuine smile was hiding on her face than the polite one she usually wore. ...Priestess Boobatine?

"Oh stop," Louise Velvetine rolled her eyes and swatted my lower back. "Don't make fun of me. I just feel like, if we're really in a relationship..."

"Then it's something that needs to be said," I finished, feeling... a little scared, I suppose. "Even in small ways." I leaned in and put my head on her shoulder, trying not to think about the abyss behind me--all around us, honestly, though it was only visible through the gap. Trying not to think about gods and administrators and the fate that I'd set for myself, or how it all might still go so very wrong. Especially... especially since I still had some big scary super-fight left to go. I don't want to lose you, I thought at her, directly, unable or unwilling to say it out loud.

Louise's arms pulled me closer, tightly. Say it.

"I don't want to lose you," I repeated.

Louise's arms tightened. I love you, Jerry Applebee.

I laughed. Say it.

Louise shook her head, and very quietly, in my ear, I heard the words I wanted to hear. And quietly, I said the same words back to her.

Knowing we needed to part ways, knowing the danger ahead... I was glad we didn't leave that unsaid.

----------------------------------------

It was some hours later that I said goodbye to her, too, as she went back to the real world to check on her daughter and keep up with her normal life, with a Kalamitus Tower Pass in her metaphorical, Dungeoneer hand. It was bittersweet; I no longer had to worry that she was waiting here, trapped and miserable, but I also couldn't count on seeing her for a while. I won't say that my eased guilt made it that much easier to concentrate, but it did help me feel a bit better.

I ended up playing around with my new skills, especially my new, as yet unnamed perception skill that Merry had made, for a couple hours before deciding I should start the next day well rested and heading to bed. Merry couldn't quite explain the headspace she'd been in when she stacked a whole bunch of pieces together into the new skill, but she did say that she had used the copious amounts of spilled experience to mutate the pieces into new things, so it wasn't quite like I could guess at the skill from what went into it. It did still show me the little white lines that were some part of the Dungeon's internals being revealed to me, but I wasn't entirely sure, yet, what it was actually doing, much less how to make good use of it.

One thing it definitely did was give me eyes in the back of my head, but it wasn't quite as flexible as telekinetic sense, which had given me an impression of everything going on around me--a function that for the most part had been integrated into the Vampiric Cloak, as part of its domain-like field. Instead, I had to mentally look in a direction, and I would get a separate impression of what I was looking at. It was a somewhat faded impression, and not particularly detailed, but then, it's not as though this skill was at high levels yet, either. Maybe it would function better later, or maybe it would have to be adjusted.

I definitely got the impression, from Merry and from my own instincts, that I hadn't figured out quite what made the skill special, but that there definitely was something in there. Considering that the pieces used weren't only perception-focused, since she had used leftovers, perhaps there was some attack component there that could be used later, but Merry was content to let me figure it out and didn't try to explain.

She shrugged when I questioned her about it, and said, I'm not entirely sure, but I think that if you figure it out yourself, it'll work better. I didn't quite follow her logic, but then, we were both operating at least in part on instincts, and I couldn't look down on her for that.

When I did end up going to bed, I found myself... not exactly unable to sleep, but restless. Moreso than I'd been in a while. Most of that, I think, was a sudden and deep desire to be with Louise, but I also found myself at a crossroads. I knew for sure that I could skip the fight with Bo, which was a lot of risk just to try to save a person that I'd never even met; for all I knew, he was an asshole before the Fairy Queen recruited him or whatever. That would mean not getting to play with the new skills, but... but also, in a larger sense I wouldn't be able to play with them anyway. Unless I gave up on the Administrator thing entirely, all this stuff about skills and remaking things inside of me were all going to fade away as I took on a new role--at least, I assumed they would. I wouldn't be a normal Dungeoneer anymore, if indeed I was anything like a Dungeoneer. I'd probably never be able to dungeon dive again.

I... in a way, I guess, I wasn't all that sad about not being able to fight monsters. It had been a nightmare. The real thing is that the skills and the empowerment had been... had been proof, I guess, that I was destined for more than an average idiotic life. Instead of a job with a boss, I'd been fully independent--I'd been free. And now I was poised to never be free again.

I considered that for a long time, not coming to any good answers by the time I drifted off to sleep.