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Book IV: Chapter 3

{-Seldir-}

He was kind of hoping that, if they weren’t needed for anything, he could spend some time sleeping in.

It seemed he’d forgotten the fact that Lyrei never knew the meaning of that phrase, and started getting more impatient with each passing second.

Though eventually he realized that she wasn’t just telling him she was getting tired of waiting.

“Come on, if you’re any slower, we’re not going to be able to figure out where Rennyn ran off to…” Coupled with the remark was a shove. “Seriously, I know you’re not really asleep!”

“Rennyn isn’t here?” Seldir questioned, quickly finding he was no longer tired. He started to get up and motioned for her to give him some space to get properly dressed.

“Took you long enough!” Lyrei started wandering back to the door. “He heard that there were monsters in the area and went to look for them. Guess he didn’t like the idea of taking a break and decided to keep being the hero. And, as you can probably guess, you’re the only one who can help make sure he doesn’t get into more trouble…”

“Does Kaylin know?”

“I mean, she saw him leave. I don’t think she really acknowledged what he was doing, though. You know how I get super concentrated when I’m reading or writing fairy tales? Yeah, that’s basically how she is right now. And I’m definitely not going to be the one to tell her what’s going on…”

“Alright. I’ll be down in a minute.”

“I think Noa knows where he was trying to go. I’ll ask him so we’re all ready by the time you are.”

“Sounds good.”

Then Lyrei left.

As Seldir quickly got ready, there was really only one thing on his mind. He wondered if Rennyn realized it—the difference between helping others and being driven by a reckless sense of duty. One could actually result in saving lives; the other seemed to only be capable of putting more people in danger.

You don’t know what the kid’s gone through, Seldir eventually had to remind himself. Even if you might never understand it, you’ve got to try to help. The whole world’s at stake if something happens to him. And you can’t exactly just sit by and watch a friend throw himself into danger, can you?

When he got down, Noa was ready to relay all of the information that he knew; Rennyn had heard something from the innkeeper, and it seemed like the monsters in question were just outside of town. Since there was no mention of what the royal knights were doing about the situation, Seldir figured they didn’t care; that seemed on par with the rest of what he heard of Astiri. He instructed Noa and Lyrei to stay there—they protested, but it was safer for them that way—and he went off to find Rennyn.

Luckily, that wasn’t too hard to do. Everyone he talked to gave the same answer, and it really wasn’t long before he could follow the trails of animal footprints and, eventually, golden blood.

Seldir drew his sword once he was able to tell that he wasn’t alone, but it didn’t seem like the beasts were interested in him. He moved faster, partially fearing whatever might be happening, until he encountered a small group of people.

They must’ve been merchants, and had probably been attacked. But it seemed like they’d been somewhat prepared for it, or at least knew how to keep serious injuries to a minimum.

“What happened here?” Seldir prompted. He could hear beasts a little further up ahead, but he couldn’t quite see where.

“We’d been attacked by monsters,” the oldest merchant said. “We fended off the ones we encountered, but there started to be more than we could handle, and then a young man showed up…”

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Another merchant, perhaps the oldest one’s wife, nodded. “We could head back to town, but… that young man can’t fight them all on his own. We’re going to try to help him, as… soon as we figure out how. One of our children has already gone out to get help from someone in town. Are you one of them?”

“I guess you could say that,” Seldir replied, repressing a sigh. “This young man. He wouldn’t happen to be a blond with a fancy sword, would he?”

The oldest merchant nodded.

“Alright. I’m a friend of his and a mercenary—I think I’ll be able to take care of it. It’s just past here?”

“Mhm. We want to help, too.”

“I don’t want you to get hurt. Do you have any medical supplies with you? I’ll pay you for them, it’s just in case he needs it.”

“Yes, we do. I’ll get those ready.”

He didn’t waste any more time, noting that it seemed like the beasts had grown quieter. He just hoped that it was a good sign and beat down any annoyance in favor of concern. Well, being with Lyrei had taught him that it was possible to be both, but he didn’t want to come off as too rude.

Seldir soon found himself in a small clearing littered with giant wolf corpses and painted in golden blood. Rennyn was right in the center of it, mumbling something through quick breaths and brief scans of the surrounding area. He looked every bit of someone who’d just cleared this whole pack of wolves on his own—which is to say, tired, and not exactly scratch-free.

“Hey, are you alright?” Seldir prompted as he approached Rennyn. “There’s a couple of merchants not far from here. Some of those cuts look like they could be bad, let’s get you—”

“Don’t touch me right now,” Rennyn hissed. He took a deep breath. “I—I’ve got this golden blood on my clothes. I know how to get it off but I don’t want you to touch any of it.”

After a moment, Seldir nodded. “What do you need me to do?”

“Can you see if those merchants have a cloth? Preferably one they don’t mind getting rid of later. And some water.”

“Okay. I’m guessing I don’t have to tell you not to go anywhere.”

Seldir quickly went back to the merchants, explained what he needed, then took it back to Rennyn. Rennyn’s overall calmness almost had a chilling sense to it; it came with the realization that this kid wasn’t unfamiliar with what he was doing and had, perhaps, started to grow numb to the feeling.

And from Seldir’s experience, that was hardly a good thing.

“I… think that’s all of it,” Rennyn announced.

“Then go on and lean on me. I’ll walk you back to the merchants.”

“Yeah…”

They walked back together and the merchants offered what they had. Seldir kindly asked if they could take watch, just in case any more monsters showed up; even if he didn’t have the most first aid knowledge, he felt like Rennyn would be more comfortable around someone familiar. All of the merchants agreed and it allowed the two of them some time alone.

“I assume I’m in trouble,” Rennyn remarked casually. He never looked at Seldir or his own cuts. Instead, he kept staring blankly at where the monsters were. Did he expect more to come or for one of them to get back up?

“You’re one hell of a reckless dumbass,” Seldir grumbled back. He sighed—being annoyed wasn’t going to get the right point across. “You literally did everything you told the rest of us not to do. You left on your own and you rushed into battle. You didn’t take your own advice of sticking together, and you didn’t make sure we knew where you were. What the hell do you think would’ve happened if things had been worse? If you’d gotten into serious danger somewhere? We can’t help you if we don’t know where you are. And we sure as hell can’t save the world if you’re dead.”

“I know.”

“Then why are you doing it? None of us want to see you hurt.”

“You wouldn’t understand it.”

“What if I wanted to be able to understand? We’re a team. We’re supposed to be able to trust each other, tell each other what’s bothering us. You should know that I have your back in anything. But I don’t think you do. Or, at least, for some reason, you’re not allowing yourself to see that. Is that what it is? You don’t want to have us with you?”

Rennyn hesitated. At first, Seldir thought that meant he was actually going to give a real answer. “You’re not going to understand it. You never will. This is the kind of burden you’re never going to bear.”

“I might not be able to bear the full weight of it, but can’t I—as an ally—at least be able to share a little?”

Rennyn remained silent. He never looked at Seldir, not then or on their walk back to the city. And he stayed quiet, no matter what Seldir did to spark some kind of response, until it seemed he wasn’t really aware of anything they were doing.

And Seldir just hoped that, eventually, that would change—that Rennyn could pull his head out of the water, and see all the people who’d been trying from the beginning to help him out.