Tilly's mind went from sluggish comfort to manic overdrive in the space of a breath as he tried to process what had just happened.
For her part, Amelia leaned back from the soft kiss and looked into his eyes searchingly. Tilly's heartbeat sped up, and he opened his mouth to say something… but there was nothing. No quip, stupid joke, or even a lame piece of small talk rose to the occasion, leaving them both stuck with an awkward silence that pained Tilly on a physical level.
Seeing the man who had literally charged into fights with horrific monsters, frozen in uncertainty brought a sudden and genuine smile to Amelia’s vulnerable expression. A steady resolution solidified behind her eyes and with a deep breath, she broke the silence first,
“Look, you don’t have to worry. I’m not asking you on a date or anything like that. I am, however, woman enough to recognize what a friend you have been to me, and I didn't want you to leave without knowing how much you meant to a lot of us here,” She allowed her last sentence to trail off, as she searched for the right words to communicate how she felt, “I guess what I want to say is, you are more than a hero, or some distant noble sacrifice that we can all watch crash and burn. You are a real person, one that many of us can and will protect with just as much passion and determination as you show in your role. No one else can do what you have to… but you are not alone. Please don’t forget that.”
Her works trickled and dripped through the space between them, thawing the last of his frozen defenses. Edifices that had kept him insulated from really needing anyone were now nothing more than puddles as he realized he cared deeply for the people around him. To his embarrassment, Tilly felt a deep blush creeping up his neck like a freaking schoolgirl at the realization, and Kindle cheeped in confusion, looking back and forth between Amelia and her bond with curiosity animating avian eyes.
The questioning tone in his bond’s voice distracted both of them for a moment, and in that brief space free of the relational tension inherent in Amelia's gaze, Tilly felt the temporary paralysis in his mouth release, freeing him to haltingly respond.
“Amelia…” He breathed, pulling her attention back from Kindle's innocent expression, “That… That means a lot. I’ve always felt like sort of a screw-up, and with all this,”-he said waving his hands around at the city built by the Alliance- “I finally feel like I know my place in the world, and I actually believe I might have a chance at succeeding. I have no clue how I’m going to pull any of it off, but for the first time in my life, I have hope that something different is possible. Something here has been trusted to me… and I’m going to do whatever it takes to make sure you, the kids, and this whole place has a chance to survive what is coming.” Then it was his turn to look down, his eyes finding part of his armored jacket that rested over the knot of scar tissue in his side.
“We’ve both had that thing inside of us. We know better than anyone that it won’t stop until it consumes everything. If I can keep even one more person from experiencing that… I will.” He said, lifting his eyes to find hers beginning to shine in the low light emanating from the moon and stars. Tilly wasn’t sure if what he was saying made sense or not, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that it was important to say something genuine here, even if it wasn’t perfect. He was done pretending to have it all together, hiding behind masks of cool competence or indifferent humor.
As cliche as it was… something about her admission made him want to try and be himself… whatever that meant.
“Ugh-” She groaned, rubbing the heels of her hands into her watering eyes, “It's never simple is it?”
Tilly opened his mouth to try and wring some clarity out of the wet rag that was his thoughts but she didn’t give him the chance, “ No, I get it. Trust me I do. There is more to life than our little wants. Honestly, in your shoes, I would be doing the exact same thing… but whether this helps or not, I needed you to know that it would hurt to lose you. So don’t go jumping off the first bridge you find because you see a bad guy down there that needs an axe to the face, got it?” She finished with a lopsided grin.
“Yes, Ma’am.” He said, now grinning in return, “If it helps, I have been figuring out all sorts of ways to deliver some serious hurt from a distance.”
“It would help a lot more if those ways didn’t keep exploding in your face-”
“... Yeah, that's a good point. Maybe Kindle can drop some of these off for me.”
“Cheep.” She happily agreed, her mental cheerful acceptance not at all hinting if she understood what Tilly was implying or not.
Amelia chuckled at that, stuffing her hands deep into her pockets and rocking back on her heels, “Well, goodnight Jonathan Tillman. Hopefully, I’ll see you in a week or two. Then we can all face whatever is next… together.”
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Something about her last word carried so many layers of meaning, that it took Tilly’s breath away. It was deeper than the possible chemistry between them. In those words, Tilly felt the call of something that he had been chasing his whole life and never felt worthy to obtain. He had looked for it in the Fire department, shattered it after the loss of his daughter, and ran away from it ever since. It was the call to belong to something greater a greater whole than yourself… a family.
He choked up then, trying to swallow down the lump in his throat, and in a flurry of impulsive action, slung an arm around her, pulling her into a fierce hug. She squealed in alarm at the sudden movement but as soon as she recognized it for what it was, she answered the strength of his embrace. Wrapping her arms around his chest with a surprising amount of force.
“... I won't waste what’s been given me… I promise.” he breathed, through the roiling of his emotions. It was then, clinging to another who cared for him on a fundamental level, that he felt the full weight of his responsibility lifting from his shoulders. It was still there, but instead of weighing him down, he felt a new strength bearing it up, flowing from a place deeper than he currently had the ability to comprehend. He wasn’t in a video game trying to beat the boss. He was fighting for something real, and the conviction that flowed from that realization felt endless in its capability.
Having communicated everything he could in his fierce display of body language, his shoulders relaxed, and he let her go, allowing the moment to pass slowly. She came away with a dopey smile on her face and awkwardly shoved her hands back down into her pockets.
“No matter what happens, I will see you again… all of you. I can’t promise when, but I’m never letting this go.” He declared fiercely.
She nodded silently, now the mute member of the duo. But her eyes showed with that same light of resolution, one that spoke of acceptance and hope, all mingled into one. Then with that, she turned on her heels and walked off into the night and Tilly watched her go for a while, letting what had just happened settle down into his soul. Once she turned off the street, he slid open his door and found a fire smoldering in the fireplace adding to the already warm feeling suffuing his whole body.
“Whoever keeps this place needs a raise,” he muttered to himself as Kindle once again woke from her half-sleep with a happy trill and hopped/ glided into the stacked stone structure to nestle in amongst the dying flames. Tilly smiled tiredly and wandered over to the pile of dried logs, picking up a few and stacking them all around the softly glowing phoenix, who had already fallen back to sleep in the growing heat.
With a quick step out to perform a total body immolation consuming all the grit and sweat caked on his skin, he got ready for bed. He had no way to really tell what time it was, but he trusted his body to wake him along with the sun. With a final happy look in Kindle’s direction, he slumped into bed, determined to make the most of what would probably be his last night of comfort for a long time.
…
Dawn’s soft light came with the soft sound of his sliding door closing, and Tilly jerked up, reaching for his hatchets. Kindle trilled angrily from her spot in the crook of his neck and he sent her a bleary apology as he stumbled out of bed and found a steaming tray of food next to his door…
Tilly sighed in gratitude as he sidled up to the tray tucking into his simple but delicious food. Kindle started pecking at his arm insistently, and he grabbed a few nearby logs and enflamed them, before tossing them into the fireplace until it was almost dangerously full. She cheeped in excitement and dived in immediately beginning to siphon off the heat.
Soon enough they were both well-fed, and ready to head out, Tilly looped his hatchets and then moved over to pick up his new belt, now with all of its five slots filled.
Hermetic Belt of Multiplication. (Mythic)
Holds up to five alchemical-based items, and will protect them from anything short of a Fourth Tier attack. Any item used from this belt will begin to reform on its clip until a complete copy is reproduced. Reformation time dependent on quality level of item. Belt cannot reform anything equal to or above its Quality rating.
Tilly smiled grimly as he clipped it back on under the flap of his jacket. His anti-fey improvised explosive sack was his lowest quality item on the belt, only rated at Rare and it had reformed in minutes. That seemed like it would prove to be all kinds of useful in the near future. His highest quality item was ironically the Modified Phoenix Fire Flask or Doom Ducky rated at Legendary. Its description was disappointingly vague, and he hoped to put it to use as soon as possible on the way to the Contested Lands to give it maximum time to reform.
Modified Phoenix Fire Flask - aka Doom Ducky (Legendary)
Promethean Fire imbued with the Phoenix’s aspect of rebirth and magnified by a dragon glass container enchanted to explode on breaking. Caution this is a Plane First Item. Its effects are untested and unknown.
After the Council meeting last night, Tilly could think of several fallen Factions between here and the Contested Lands that would be good candidates for a test of his secret weapon. Places that had descended so deeply into the chaos and hunger of Corruptions influence that had already begun to cannibalize everything around them.
Or course, that was if they could convince their resident dragon to actually work with them. Tilly winced at the prospect of getting that thing to do anything helpful… but it wasn’t like they had a choice.
He shot a mental invite over to Kindle and she she shook the last of the dying embers from her now-glowing form and hopped into the air from the fireplace, landing on his shoulder with a few flaps of her wings. Her body was already only slightly smaller than his head, and soon she wouldn't be able to perch on his shoulder anymore… again. This whole bird dad thing was made a lot more complicated by the fact that his bird was immortal and would keep repeating its life cycle.
‘You ready girl?’
She sent back an image of a hawk diving down on unsuspecting prey and let out a fierce trill.
‘Agreed. They don’t know what's coming.’ He sent back, sliding open the door to the bustling city and heading toward the mine-turned-dragon’s lair. Before abruptly coming face to face with Edna the elderly satyr Arborist.
Well not really face to face, seeing as her head only came up to Tilly’s chest, but even with the height difference, he always felt like he was somehow looking up at her.