Ch 28 Laughing all the way

I sat there, a little stunned. A US Marine Major, former or not, was making a deal with me, to supply those with prosthetics to make life better. I could do that. I need to make some auto size wands. Like this minute though.

Standing up I go to see if there are any wooden dowels anywhere in the store. I find curtain dowels and crafting dowels. I can cut them down and it should be enough for now. It won't make a hundred, but between me and Raven we should have plenty by morning. Along with the thousands of pristine and sealants, we can sell to the Fort. We should be good. I wasn't planning on sleeping anytime soon anyway.

I go to check out, it takes me a minute to find my card and my wallet. I had them in my inventory, but I had forgotten what they looked like. Raven pulled them for me in time, for the cashier to ask for them.

Loading up my cart worth of yarn and wood, and some reams of paper and sharpies? I suppose I would need them. Once I paid for everything, walked outside and shoved it into my inventory then put the cart away. Then I got back into my car and asked Raven for directions to another store.

“Confirmed, navigation will be highlighted in vision.”

So, I followed the blue lines to the second open store. More fixed on getting wood this time, and a second saw. Getting there took roughly 30 min, because there was somehow traffic at 4am.

“Raven, can you make auto size wands while I'm driving?”

“Negative, user has never performed that action.”

“Then make a bunch of auto size tags with the paper please.”

“Confirmed.”

That should help, especially with the drive. Getting to the store I had a thought.

“Raven continue making the auto size tags and just put them into my inventory as you make them, ok?”

“Confirmed, items from inventory will be used in construction.”

I nodded and grabbed a cart. Then headed off to find more wooden rods and dowels. This store had a hardware section, so I had better luck getting more. Some were extremely long, so I asked if they could be cut down to six feet or so. The one of the three workers agreed, saying they had nothing else to do. So now I have nearly 15 six-foot rods. The helpful worker also let me grab two more hand saws then helped me check out. I slipped him a twenty and left.

Once I got to my car everything went into my inventory. Now time for home and crafting once more.

*

“Raven how many tags did you make?”

“Attention, Raven has created 627 auto size tags while user was performing other actions.”

Jesus wept. I could sell them all to the fort. Well, I'll sell 600 for even numbers anyway.

“Ok, I'm going to make an auto size wand, once I have completed it correctly, I want you to start making them as well, understand?”

“Confirmed, when materials are prepared, Raven will make auto size wands for user.”

Well shit. I have to cut the rods first. “Can you not cut the rods as well?”

“Confirmed, if given the directive.”

“Please help me cut all the rods down to 6 inches please.”

Raven goes to work, pulling one rod out and swiping their hand exactly six inches from the end, a perfect even cut. I’m a little startled but whatever. I’ll have her cut all the rods while I make the wands then.

I take the proto wand and start etching in the auto size enchantment. These rods were a little narrower, so I had a little less space. But the auto size had a different shape to them so that I could still make it fit.

It took a couple practice tries with sharpie before I was comfortable using the knife to carve it, but I finished one. And the system recognized it. Then I checked my inventory, and Raven was almost completely finished with the rods. I was a little spooked by that, but whatever.

So, I just picked up another and kept working. “Raven when you're finished with rods start making auto size wands. And set and alarm for 9a”

“Confirmed.”

And that's how I spent the next several hours. I hadn't looked at the clock when I got home so I just kept at it until Raven alerted me.

“Attention it is now 9am, user must be present in one hour.”

I finished the wand I was one and stuck it into my inventory. I grabbed something to eat from my dwindling pile of meals and scarfed it down. Then pulled out my suit. Looked at it, second guessed it. And pulled my nice slacks and a button up on. Hit them both with pristine and auto size. Put on my good boots. Then got into my car.

“Raven please continue making auto size wands. Until we are there. Also please pull up visual navigation to my destination.”

“Confirmed, navigation set. Wands to be created will be deposited in inventory.”

With that I pulled my junker out into the morning traffic.

*

Nearly 80 minutes later I'm pulling into the suggested cafe. Sweating bullets, because not only am I late, but my car started clunking on the way there. The bad clunk, where it sounds like something is about to drop out from underneath. I pull into a spot a few spots down from the entrance so I can clean myself up a bit.

By which I mean hitting myself with pristine all over. Even my hair. Which feels much better than the sweaty ess it had been.

“Raven what is out count of auto size wands now?”

“Attention, current count is 251” holy crap I didn't realize we made that many. Well, I had a starting point at least. Ok cleaned up but late, traffic was an excuse but so was my car. Enchanting was also an excuse. Or I could simply say I had bad timing.

The major. No, I should think of him as Oscar, he appreciated my honesty. I'll tell him I had bad timing and was still enchanting. That works.

I walked into the Major’s rest cafe. It's quite nice, fairly old school. Lots of wooden chairs and tables. The chairs are the seat back type that hold you in. I suppose if you're getting on in age you want to be comfortable.

I looked around and sitting towards the back, which was a long ways from the front actually was a trio of couches. Facing a plush recliner. In the recliner was Oscar. So that's where I headed. There were other people on the couches, so I supposed that who I was supposed to meet.

Once I was close enough, I started to apologize to Oscar.

“Sorry, Oscar, I had bad timing, I was still enchanting and thought I would make it here in an hour, not take so long.”

He grumbled something, then laughed. “Son, are you telling me, that you left the store and have been working since then?”

I blinked, “uh, yeah? I don't need as much sleep any more with a couple skills I have. I just had to go buy supplies. I made quite a few auto size wands and have plenty of pristine and sealant wands for you though.”

Oscar waved his hand at the folks around him on the couches. There was eight people. Five men three women. They all looked younger than Oscar but still seemed to respect him. They crowded around so I had space to sit on the couch next to Oscar.

“So, tell me Arthur. How many wands did you sell to the DMC?”

I pause a moment. “Uh directly? Like 200, but I was letting them resell up to a thousand?”

Oscar frowned at that. “You're letting them resell your wands? Why?”

“Because they are connected to a bunch of little hospitals and clinics and such? And I have over 4000 on me? Of each?”

The group stared at him.

“What do you mean each?” someone asked.

“Ugh like 4500 sealant and 4300 pristine wands? Oh, and like 200 auto size wands, but I also have like 600 auto size tags too?”

There was much silence. Then Oscar clapped. It was a sharp sound.

“Tell me Arthur, how much are they reselling them for?”

“Oh, just 100 over the original price. I said they're not allowed to make that much money off them, just enough for doing the instructions and such.”

One man coughed.

“Oh, don't worry, it was a system backed contract. So, no getting out of it. And its open ended so either of us can end it anytime. I can sell them more and they can buy more any time. Mostly I'm just waiting for them to have liquid funds. Apparently, that's pretty uncommon.”

One woman looked at me and asked. “How much are you selling the wands for?”

So, I replied. “Originally when I needed cash it was a grand, but now that I'm not so hard up and I'm selling in bulk, $500 each. But there are a few caveats. Only one person can use each wand. The wand attunes the person that casts with it first. And can't be re attuned. But one person can have multiple wands. Like I have a wand of every type. And holder for them.”

I pull out my wand holder and strap it on. Placing one of the auto size wands in the holder on the left side.

“It was originally a throwing knife holder but works for this too.”

They just looked at me. “What? I have to run the dungeon to gain experience faster than crafting? And there more mana in the dungeon so it's easier to craft.”

I get a couple of shaken heads. Oscar glances around. Then pulls out a piece of paper.

“To the point then. We would like to buy all your current supply of wands, excluding what you have promised others now. I can wire the money to your bank account.”

I take a breath. “Ok I'm just going to point this out. These wands are also available in the system store as well. For different prices. I sell these to hospitals for cheap as they need them the most. I was selling them to the guard to arm them to gain experience. Why should I sell them directly to the military?”

Oscar pauses. Disbelief written across his face. Like he thought I would just go along with it.

“You have men running the dungeon, they can also buy the wands. I'm going to sell the auto size wand to the DMC and the system store. So why try to Shanghai me here and now?”

There were a few sputters, but no forth coming answers.

“You said that you spent five months in the dungeon, shouldn't you be paid for your hard work? Why not the military who is helping people run the dungeons? And keeping monsters at bay?” one of the men at the other couch said.

“Bullshit. The only monsters free of the dungeon are summons, and no one, I mean no one has leveled high enough for that. These wands use a person's mana. Outside a dungeon that mana use can kill them. These are for dungeon running and medial use only. So why do you want them so badly?” I called them out.

There were glances around, then a few glances to Oscar.

I sat up. “Listen, I will happily sell them to VAs if they would take them. Thats why I started with the biggest hospital I could find and made a deal. I'm selling more to them as they network with others to sell more. But here’s the thing. I don't need cash. I have over a hundred thousand credits. I could live off that alone. I can literally buy a house from the system store and live in outer space and just teleport down to the dungeon whenever I feel like. So, tell me why you're trying so hard.”

Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.

Nervous glances all around.

Oscar straightened up now. “Because you were right. The government will fall. And we wanted something in place to keep people's rights in order. Might makes right will take over. And we as a group wanted to select people to be in that group. I'm sorry that we approached you so poorly. Some people” he glanced around “are so used to throwing their weight around to getting what they want too easily and forget how the civilian word works, that they can't rely on their rank to get things done. That pony isn't always reliable. So, I'm asking you now. What are you doing to enable people to make their lives better?”

I stared at him. Then laughed. I laughed so hard I cried. And laughed some more. I nearly fell over. I laughed until it hurt, and I had trouble breathing. It took me almost twenty minutes to calm down.

I was red faced and teary eyed. Joyous though. He was an old man who never played a game. Especially not an online game. I looked around. They were all over 40. I kept chuckling to myself. This was hilarious. I wiped my face with my sleeve. Then hit myself with a pristine.

Then pulled out my tablet and pulled up my website for Wands and Words, then just handed it to Oscar. I just sat back and couldn’t stop laughing. I had simmered down some. But this. This was truly the highlight of my day.

He wanted to make a guild. He wanted to purchase wands from me for his guild. He wanted to lead a guild. This was so fucking funny. I was hiccupping from laughing so hard. The people on the couches were enraged at me. But I still found it so funny.

Oscar was looking over the site. He was mad, I was laughing, then intrigued. Then awkward and embarrassed.

He sat there while I just laughed. Then I made a shooing motion, and he passed the tablet around. The others all started looking embarrassed as well.

One of them got up and brought me a glass of water. I tried to nod thanks but still couldn't stop chuckling. All my anger was transformed into hilarity.

Giggling still, I called out. “Raven start calm mind”

Then I was calming down. My thoughts coming back to me. The hilarity of the situation was still there but I could push it down.

I heard a whispered, “Confirmed.”

Drinking the water now and pristining my face and sleeve. I got serious or tried to. I was still smiling.

“Ok, let me tell you about guilds.”

We then had a discussion, on how they worked, what the purpose was and how they could focus. What they looked like in different games. Then I told them the point of my guild and how I was running people and getting them used to leveling up on their own or with a partner from my guild. We all got food and drinks from the cafe and stayed there for a few hours discussing several things.

The first of which was I would let them run with my guildmates for free, they just had to buy wands and armor like everyone else. Then they could join my guild for a while running people until they felt comfortable making their own guild doing whatever their original plan was.

Oscar was more sheepish when he said his original plan was finding people and leveling them up and having them in his group.

I stifled another chuckle. I said that won't work long term, because the dungeons level up too. I told him I'm open to friendly rivals, but they just want to make a dedicated team to run the dungeon and add more teams as they go along. Oscar confirmed that's mostly what they wanted to do. I stated they could make a dungeon running guild like that for sure. They just need to find people that wanted to do nothing but run the dungeon.

And then find crafters who wanted to stay in the dungeon for longer periods and they can go together and not be isolated. If they wanted to make it an entire guild they would need an entire force behind them. And it can't be connected to the military. Because its civilians that would make the dungeon guild. The military would have their own running the dungeon and not let their troops run as they want to use their skills. But as they are set.

The civilians that have been playing games for the last two decades know how to run and set up a guild. They would know how to prepare for level ups and how to become self-sufficient. They would know how to balance a group for each level of the dungeon. And how to map out and guide newbies for the dungeon levels.

Because as people level up so will the dungeon. Which this group didn't know. So, I told them about the first clear reward. And talked about Raven. Who answered all my questions about the system and let me make purchases without a bus stop.

Oscar mentioned that he would need to separate his group from the military then. I told him when he decides if he wants to run with my guild for a while to get his peoples levels up give me a call. Or if he wants to go straight for getting a guild set up let me know. And that ill still sell him wands for his guild.

To which Oscar was now embarrassed. He thought he was the first with a great idea. And now understood why I kept laughing. I had already been running people and leveling them as much as I could. And making sure they had armor even. He hadn't thought of armor.

We chatted awhile more of the differences between a civilian guild and a military set up would have. Such as regulations, sure a guild will have ranks, but it'll be more by skill than by power. Teams will be more balanced. And healers will be important to home base especially with sealant.

There will be a level of might makes right. Which is why I'm pushing so hard in my skills. I can one shot a hobgoblin easily now. I think. I can solo the current dungeon, but what about the next?

What happens when the dungeon changes? I hadn't asked anybody's level, but if I leveled in five days, how much did they level?

*

Getting back home was a tragedy. My car just gave up. On the highway of course. It clunked its last. Then it shuddered and sunk to the ground. Going 60mph was bad. Very bad. I had my hazard lights on and people starting avoiding me quickly. But I had little choice as to what I could do.

I wasn't in an outer lane. So, I had to call police dispatch and tell them what's going on. Where I was and that my car died on the highway. Apologizing the entire time. They had to send officers and a tow truck out to block off the lane and to pick up my car.

The police were friendly at least. Asking me if there was anything in it I needed. So, I had the quick thought of emptying every scrap of paper and junk from the backseat, the trunk and glove box into my inventory. Then explaining to the cops the cars a junker never getting fixed and I have an inventory.

I told the tow truck driver. It's a complete pos and take it to where cars die. He gives me a grin and has me sign the car away. I could have sold it for scrap, but it wasn't worth it at this point.

One of the cops asked me where I needed a ride to. So, I said DMC. He seemed very alert now, I waved him off. I wasn't a patient but a client. I handed something for them, but I'd be fine after that. If they didn't find dropping me off?

The cop agreed easily. It was a big place and easily found. The tow truck made its way into traffic, the other cop started picking up traffic cones, then we pulled into traffic and made our way to DMC.

It didn't take us long to get there. Being in a police SUV tends to have benefits, even if I'm riding in the back. He pulls up to the entrance and I wait for him to let me out. He does so with a grin. I thank him politely and we part ways. He made a joke about dropping non injured off here, and I chuckled.

Going to the receptionist, I wait for her to acknowledge me. It's one I don't know. But it's like 3pm so.

She looks up at me. “Can I help you sir?”

“Yes ma’am, I'm here to see Dumar if he is free?”

She blinks. ‘I'm sorry do you have an appointment?”

I pause. She must not know. “I have a standing engagement with him. If you could please contact him and tell him turner is here.”

She looks put out. Like she was so busy looking at her computer. Then picks the phone up and calls Dumars office. She speaks pleasantly with someone then hangs up.

“I'm sorry sir, it seems mt Dumar is in a meeting with Mr. Calloway. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“Oh, that's perfect, I need both of them. Same office?”

I stride away, towards the elevators. She stands up and looks at me, not sure if she should stop me or not. Her professionalism doesn't know if she should yell or not.

I step into the elevator and head to Calloway's office. But at least I knock before entering. Dumar peaks out and sees me, then ushers me in.

“We had been thinking about you Arthur. Now is a good time for you to come by. We have much more interest in the wands than originally estimated. How many can you sell us right now?”

I blinked at him and his sudden change of pace. Last time they were unsure of 200, not they wanted more?

“I have over 4000 of each. And a new wand of auto size. But I only have 200 of those so far. Still making more.”

A whisper in my ear, “attention user, Raven has continued to craft auto size wands, count is currently 864”

I blink and refocus on Dumar, who sits in front of Caloways desk.

“Well then, I can't take 4000 but I could likely take 1000 of each, does that sound alright? Not sure about auto size wands? What is the benefit of those currently?”

I explained what I did for Oscar considering his prosthetic. And how tubing and such might be made mor comfortable if it was auto sized.

Dumar listened. Calloway was taking notes. “Like having one size fits all clothes isn't the start! Marvelous idea! Could it possibly work on bandages?”

I paused, why not? “I think so?”

Dumar grinned. “Then it might work on grafting skin!” I blinked in shock. That was not something I had ever considered. I looked at my hand, imaging losing skin and trying to pristine. Then auto size. My brain just blanked.

“I would suggest you try it on pigs first, maybe pristine as well, and not announce it yet.” I hated to burst his bubble, but that was far outside what I had imagined, and if couldn't picture it happening, I don't think it would work.

Dumar lost a little of his joy, “right of course, testing outside of parameters. Makes perfect sense”

Calloway gave me a grateful look. Then slid me a piece of paper. It was a written notice of sale for 1000 pristine wands and 1000 sealant wands. Just needed my signature then he’d wire the money to me. So, I signed. Calloway typed something into his phone, and I was suddenly a much richer man.

Then I got an alert on my phone that my account was alerted. I blinked. And stared. Then put my phone away. I'll deal with it later. I gave Calloway a nod and asked for a copy of the sale notice.

He wrote it out and had me sign it and he signed it and gave it his official stamp with all details included. Even the fact they were an authorized reseller. I thanked him.

“So now I have to go deal with my bank. Do you want to see something cool? I'm about to buy a car from the system?”

Dumar paused. Calloway stood up. I headed towards the elevators, and they followed.

“Raven tell me about the available cars for sale that I can afford right now? Future tech, but one seater or two seater.”

“Confirmed. Automotives for human use in comparison to current available in affordable range. Query, would two, three or four wheeled be preferable?”

I thought a moment. “Would the two wheel have internal stabilization that would always prevent falling? Or getting the sides close to the ground?”

“Confirmed, that is an available option on most two wheeled vehicles.”

“let's look at those then. Wait are there any vehicles that can convert into smaller items that can be transported into my inventory?”

A pause while Raven catalogues options. “Confirmed several two wheeled have the option to minimize to be transported and can be desized enough for inventory.”

I can have a motorcycle in my inventory, that was awesome. “What are my current options? Are any of them capable of current speeds?”

“Confirmed. They can be controlled at current low access and high access speeds.”

“Ok can any of them be controlled by you?”

“Confirmed. Any system tech can be controlled by User AI.”

Then maybe I wanted a car instead. Sit back and relax. “Ok wipe the thought of two wheeler. I want a four wheeled van like model than you can control that has full bathroom and ouch in.”

“Confirmed. What specifications would you like?”

I thought a moment. “Can you have it so that it can teleport to me, or I can teleport to it?”

“Confirmed.”

“I want enough head room to be able to stand, room for a two seater couch the full bathroom, room for a desk and chair. There needs to be a driver's seat in the case that I have to be in the driver's seat. I don't care what size the outside is, but the inside needs to have enough space for everything. Maybe even a pull out bed. For my current mattress.”

A pause. “Calculating”

“And I want to be able to set the colors and fabrics and materials later.”

“Integrating.”

I waited. Standing on the edge of the curb. Dumar and Calloway standing near me, just talking between themselves. I turned to them.

“Yes, of course. I have an invisible AI. It's the first clear reward. I can purchase anything from the system store without a bus stop. It saves me so much time when don't have to scroll through options.”

They gave me a look. “What? I've been designing my new digs! I'm getting rid of my apartment and since my car died, I needed a new one anyway! Why not combine them! The system makes it possible! And I have credits to blow!”

Calloway laughed. Dumar rolled his eyes.

“Attention. Finalization requested.”

“Ok hit me.”

“Exterior color?”

“blue”

“Interior material?”

“Light redwood”

“Bathroom material type?”

“Rounded waterfall shower, basin sink, full flush toilet, blue grey tiles scheme.”

“Couch choice?”

“Cushy fluffy reclining two seater gray suede with cup holders”

“Cab type?”

“Typical truck cab with bucket seat and rear view camera.”

“Confirm current mattress from current dwelling?”

“Yes.”

“Desk type?”

“Corner desk with glass top”

“Chair type?”

“Just give me a fancy office chair. And make that two seater just a recliner instead.”

“Confirmed. Any additions?”

“it'll run off the system, right? For power water and gas and such?”

“Confirmed.”

“Then give me a running skylight down the center. One that I can make opaque or clear. And purple fairy lights around the bed. But make the bed a pull down as I don't always need it. Like the bathroom in the very back the recliner facing the front, the desk facing the recliner in the corner with the bathroom. And the bed can be pulled down over the recliner?”

“Confirmed.”

“Can I sell my current stuff in my apartment to the system? Or the system can give it away to someone who needs it?”

“Confirmed. Completed.” well that's done. I just need to turn in my apartment keys and break the lease. I can park at the guild anyway.

“Can you also break my lease and turn in my key?”

“Negative, must be done in person.”

Worth a try. “Alright, what's the total?”

“Attention, complete vehicle to specifications made for Arthur Turner is 80, 000 credits. Would you like to purchase?”

Wow, I was expecting it to be way more.

“Yes, yes, I do. Can you park it right here please?”

The area near the curb went fuzzy the a tv screen that gets warped in the heat, then suddenly there was a van parked there. My van. It was about six feet high and wasn't low to the ground, so I knew it was breaking physics already. I let out a yell!

Then I went to the side door and clambered in. It was perfect. A small space here, with a book rack, which I didn't even think of the recliner to one side, the desk to the other and the bathroom to the back. The skylight was currently clear.

I ducked into the front of the cab, and it looked completely normal. I was so happy. I had a permanent space that no one could claim. Muwhahahaha. Cough. Ok I stepped out and let Dumar and Calloway poke their heads in. They didn't get my excitement til I told them it ran on the system. So, water gas electricity all system based. I would never run out. I would never have to gas up. I would never have to empty my toilet. Or restock my water.

They gave me shocked looks. All the downsides of living in a rv just gone like that. And physics breaking measure that it would comfortable stand in it? Bonus.

I asked them if they needed me. I'll be parking at my guild from now on, but I'll always have my phone on me.

Then I got in and let raven drive me away. To the bank

*