SO LONG
Uncomfortable silence hung over the cliff. What was once an encampment filled with nearly 50,000 people was now a graveyard of nearly half of them. None of those who participated in the mutiny were spared. Corpses of beasts could still be seen from time to time, despite the fact that nearly two days had passed since the end of the battle.
No one was drinking or celebrating the victory; backs hunched over were the true sight to behold. Silent, almost incoherent sobs would echo here and there, but no one rejoiced. Chief Trios was currently in the group that was tasked with cleaning the corpses of the beasts. He couldn’t help but sigh at the sight; even as someone who was approaching the eve of his life, and as someone who had seen quite a lot, he couldn’t help but feel shivers on the sight. And then his gaze slowly transferred to the youth in the distance; his expression was seemingly tranquil as his hair and white robes fluttered in the gentle wind.
Lynne stood at the edge of the cliff, staring into the distant horizon. He looked much different than nearly three years ago, when he had escaped Highlind. He was slightly taller and his shoulders were much broader, while his face had slowly lost the air of youth and innocence. Lines across his cheeks had expressed themselves, giving him much older appearance. His eyes had slightly sunk and lost some of their previous luster and sheen.
It was even slightly poetic, as his outward appearance mimicked the changes he had gone as a person. Were it him from three years ago standing right here, he’d be on his knees, shaking and crying, as he begged others for forgiveness. However, he had managed to straighten his back and stand up without lowering his head.
It’s not that he didn’t care, or even that he didn’t feel guilt – it’s that he understood the meaning of burden much better. In the end, he merely sighed as he turned around and walked towards a tent in the distance. Parsia, Gru, Thalia, the monkey and the bird were all sitting outside in silence, watching him as he approached.
“Let’s go.” he said calmly, looking at the tent.
“Hm.” Thalia nodded as she got up and walked into the tent; when she exited, she wasn’t alone. In her hands was Fen’er, her body cold and motionless; she was adorned in beautiful, white gown with golden roses embroiled throughout. Her face appeared tranquil, as if she was asleep. “Here.” she stretched her arms towards Lynne.
Lynne said nothing as he took her and held her up gently. He realized her body was quite light as he wrapped his arms around her. Parsia, Thalia and him departed, leaving behind Gru, the monkey and the bird.
They walked slowly, in complete silence, as they headed to a nearby lake. Sun had already streaked across the midway point of the sky, and it was quite warm, yet none of the three even frowned. Myriad of thoughts passed through Lynne’s mind as he held the corpse of a young girl; first, above all, was pain. It hurt. Whatever her faults were, she was, in the end, someone Lynne admired. Her resolve, above all, was what he never had. To abandon her own blood for strangers… Lynne knew, deep down, he’d never be able to do that.
Second was regret. Regret he couldn’t prevent it, regret he wasn’t nicer to her, regret he never took her feelings properly. It was something he will have to live with, but he didn’t mind it. In the end, it’s what made him a human.
After about an hour of slow walk, they had finally reached their destination. The lake was crystalline clear, surrounded by lush, green forest. The scenery was beautiful and Lynne nodded lightly. A small boat was strewn ashore, adorned in flowers that gave it colors boats were never supposed to have.
The trio walked over toward it slowly and stopped; Lynne stepped forth, crouching down gently as he laid Fen’er into the boat, and covered her with soft, silken blanket.
“… this isn’t how it was supposed to be,” Lynne muttered softly as he moved her hair off from her face. “You were supposed to be a pain in my ass for many, many years to come.” he smiled bitterly as he exhaled. “Perhaps it’s a bit late to say thank you, and a bit selfish to ask for forgiveness… but, it is as it is. In the end, all of us will join you, wherever it is you’re going. If it’s nowhere, we’ll be there. If it’s somewhere, we’ll be there too. See you.”
Lynne stood up and exhaled deeply as he closed his eyes, heaving his head back. He fought the tears back but they trickled. He didn’t have many friends in this world, and he had just lost one. It hurt. It hurt more than any wound or scar. In the end, he crouched back down without wiping his tears and pushed the boat onto the still waters. Water rippled out as the small, adorned boat slowly moved forward. Lynne gazed as the boat created some distance between the shore and raised his hand slowly whereupon a single spark of Flame appeared. He flicked his finger and the Flame flew, and the boat was soon caught ablaze.
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To burn away remnants of regret and pain – that’s what Lynne heard Pyres were for. However, to him, it was just one of the ways to dispose of the corpse. At least that’s what he used to believe. There was a strange sense of peace and tranquility inside his heart as he watched the boat burn. It didn’t ease the pain he felt, nor give him hope, but it gave him a memory. Something that will stay inside his mind for as long as he lives as reminder of what it means to lose someone.
“You okay?” Thalia asked as she slowly walked up to him and hugged him from behind. Lynne’s hand soon found hers on his chest, and she gripped it tightly.
“No.” Lynne replied.
“It’d be strange if you were.” Thalia said. “She talked to me once about you, you know?” she added after short silence.
“What’d she say?” Lynne asked back.
“That she regretted ever meeting you,” Lynne smiled lightly as the words trickled into his ears. “And even more ever falling in love with you. She called you her crucible.”
“Didn’t she already pass through one?” Lynne asked back.
“She wanted to tell you,” Thalia added softly. “But she was afraid.”
“We all are.”
“What’s worse: loving someone who doesn’t love you, or never loving at all?”
“… never loving at all.” Lynne said, sighing. “Come on Parsia, it’s your turn.”
“Hm? My turn?” the Price looked at him, confused.
“Aye,” Lynne nodded. “Come on, sing a song. Give her a proper send off.”
“… you want me to sing?”
“Well, I can’t sing,” Lynne said casually. “And she sure as hell can’t,” he pointed at Thalia behind him who nodded. “And I sure as fuck won’t ask the monkey and the bird to do it. So that leaves you.”
“… what about literal thousands of other people back there?” Parsia said, pointing at the massive mob behind them; they had all followed the group in silence, and were paying respects in their own way.
“One voice starts it all,” Lynne said, smiling. “And you have a very, very cute voice.”
“…”
“Manly voice?”
“…”
“… beastly voice?”
“…”
“Sing,” Lynne suddenly lowered his voice as he smiled sadly. “For her.”
Parsia sighed inwardly and turned towards the boat in the distance; although he didn’t know her for long, he liked her. She never held back against anyone, and never wavered. Her character was steel, much like her resolve. “Aye,” he said in the end. “I’ll sing.”
“The heart of stone, the winter’s flame,
Yonder rested the maiden’s grace,
In frost and cold her smile assuage,
The hearts of beasts, the hearts of men.
She’s a spire to world’s embrace,” slowly, more and more voice joined into the choir.
“Willful soul that won’t obey,
Words of wisdom disconsolate,
Wait for us, we’re on our way…
Wait for us, we’re on our way…”
* * *
Lynne had put down a massive boulder next to the lake and quickly sliced it into a tombstone as he began carving atop of it. Night had already fallen and everyone except for him had already gone back to the camp. Fire had long since disappeared, and the lake had gone back to its tranquil state. He carved letters carefully, as if to make sure they remain here for all eternity. To endure all storms to come, and to prevail even when all of life has died. As he finished, he nodded gently and cast the final glance at the lake. His eyes appeared moist underneath the moonlight, but no tear came out. He raised his chin and smiled from the bottom of his heart.
“Have fun.” he said as he turned around and began walking slowly. Behind him remained only a tombstone of marble stone, bathed in moonbeams.
Here burned a star,
May she burn for all eternity.
- We love you, Fen’er