“Aaaaargh!”

My left hand feels like it’s on fire; the stretch marks and muscle tension are intense.

“You gotta be kidding me!” I continue to grunt.

“Boy, did you miss the drop or something?” The old man starts to panic.

I can barely look up at the rest of the crew through my teary eyes. I can feel my skin being red-hot and the veins protruding on my forehead.

I hold my left forearm tightly with my right hand, restricting the blood flow to the dissolved part. It seems that the wounds have opened up and are no longer stiff. Blood starts to flow and spurts out of the area where my little finger and the side of my palm were.

“Hold it still!” the old man orders me.

He spills about a tablespoon of acid over my wounded area, also covering a tiny part of healthy flesh.

He puts the bottle then in a safe, leveled spot and uses both of his arms to hold me by my shoulders.

“I think it has to be a healthy area! It might do the trick. Hold it together!” he encourages me. My body shakes and sweats, and I can barely even nod at him.

*Exhale*

I finally exhale, calmly and with relief, but I feel like I would like to take a quick nap after that tension. No more shaking, no anything.

My head is once again blank and focused on the present, completely desensitized. I exhale all the air from my lungs and let the fresh one fill them.

What a damn relief. Avoiding this at all costs must be my top priority, or else I need to start to enjoy the pain as a masochist.

----------------------------------------

“I got seriously worried this wouldn’t work. And the only option would be...” The old man starts the conversation.

“Running a bullet through my head?” I interrupt him.

“Would you even be able to do it?” I continue to ask.

“I did it once. And it still haunts me to this day.” He lowers his sight. “But I thought about it since we’re together. If one of us gets mortally injured and is dying in agonizing pain? I always keep one bullet, not just for myself, too.”

“I apologize, Harald,” I answer him with sadness in my voice.

“Don’t worry, finish sleeping. If anyone wants to get in the back of the car, it is a bit less windy there."

"I need to stay up, clear my thoughts once more... And do the procedure on myself.” He points his finger at the hole in his left cheek.

“You have your own jug, right?” I ask him, looking into his eyes.

“I feel relaxed enough, really! This temporary shock made me wake up anyway, so I will assist you.” I highlight “really” as he raises his eyebrows and tilts his head, questioning my status.

“I will never fucking touch this substance of yours,” Mike tells us out of nowhere while frowning.

Mike, distraught, slips his arms under Astrid and offers her a calm sleep inside the car.

He lifts and carries her there carefully while Harald and I wait for his moment.

----------------------------------------

“At least she will fit the seats without having to fold herself,” Harald adds, I believe to brighten up the mood. I cough immediately and chuckle at his dark humor.

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

“Too soon, way too soon,” I say, looking at him, and we laugh a little.

“So, what was that with the car escape earlier? I had all sorts of weird thoughts, like you might leave us for good,” I conspire.

“Ahh, sorry about that. That car is a diesel and wasn’t running for a long time, buried under the sand. I had little hope it would start at all. Just felt I needed to grind it and burn the sediments.

It was really immature, for an oldie like me. But it happens. Again, sorry...”

“Nah, it’s okay.” I tuck it under the carpet.

He takes out the bottle and offers me a sip with a gesture.

“This isn’t the acid, right?” I joke again.

He laughs and pulls the cork out with his teeth.

“Oh man, I can’t wait to replenish our water. I’m dying of thirst,” I say before taking a mouthful of cool water.

“Why didn’t you ask?”

I shrug back.

“You know what bothers me?” he asks, raising his sight.

“Hmph?” I mumble while guzzling another huge gulp.

“That the little girl needs to deal with this again. Just to set up the stopwatch,” he says sadly.

“I can’t imagine how painful it was for her. I’ve lost a small part of my palm, and the pain was unbearable. It took over me so fast.

How she made it with both of her legs fully melted, I can’t wrap my head around it.” Harald shakes his head in disbelief.

----------------------------------------

We sit there for a while, and I think about how fast it all happened back there, calculating the estimate for when his time will come and being ready with the acid dose.

“I think this is it,” he tells me calmly.

“I was thinking about the spot... And I will continue to sacrifice my toes.”

I look at him, frightened.

“Wait! How do we know we get ‘repaired’ after death? What if this is a permanent toll for the painkiller boost?” I continue speculating.

His left boot is already off, and he starts to roll down his sock.

But near the end, he starts to shake and struggle.

“Tsk. Come on. Pour it!” He barely squeezes the words out, his face twisted in pain.

I mobilize as fast as possible and do a quick pour over the nail and the tip of his fourth toe.

It starts to hiss immediately, and a terrible smell of rotting meat hits my nose again.

Harald groans and struggles to hold it together. He spits through his clenched teeth, and some saliva sizzles through the hole in his left cheek, too.

“Five. Four. Three. Two...” I start to count down, but just as I hit two, I see it in his eyes.

Complete relief, finally. He exhales deeply and closes his eyes.

“You two. You two are goddamn heroes,” he tells me, while catching his breath and glances at the Hummer, where Astrid lays on the backseat, hopefully sleeping.

I see Mike’s feet poking out of the semi-opened large trunk. He joined her to watch over.

“Are we going to sleep, or do you want to stay up?” I ask him.

“Honestly, this sudden pain and relief afterward weren’t as exhausting as I expected,” he tells me what he’d like to do.

I appreciate that he wants to spend some extra time with me and chat.

He offers me his water again, and we start to talk by the firepit.

“Nobody is going to yell at me for having a midnight fatty snack.” We both chuckle and start to munch on the dried meat.

----------------------------------------

*Brushing teeth*

Damn, what a shame. I haven’t brushed my teeth for almost a week.

I’m baffled by how I could even sleep without it. I never changed my routine; it must be all those unexpected and horrendous events combined with exhaustion that made me completely forget it.

I excuse myself and continue to use the simple toothbrush Harald showed me how to carve out of wood and some dried stalks.

I finally tuck myself back in my nest and gaze upon the stars, thinking.

I can feel that we are making a great bond together. Obviously, I can’t get closer to Astrid, even as a friend, or Mike will kill me with his stare.

Getting close to him is also not so comfortable for me.

Harald is the only buddy I have. I think of the friendly chat we had and hope that it will grow.

I fall asleep shortly after.

----------------------------------------

*Repetitive heavy breathing and counting*

Weird exertion sounds wake me up.

“Ninety-seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine...”

Rolling my head over, I see Harald doing push-ups. He’s wearing his heavy bulletproof vest, not surprising.

“It’s easy while nothing hurts, right?” These are the first words I say to him before a good morning.

“Hundred. Phew.”

He jumps up on his feet and claps. I see his arms are pumped and red.

“Wow, how come I never thought of that?” I wonder aloud.

“I think we should take advantage of this and train hard.

Seven hundred push-ups daily till I start to lift,” he says, hyped, telling me his plan right away.

“Morning.” Mike joins us while carrying Astrid and putting her gently down near my wooden throne.

They all chat together with Harald.

I decide to do something on my own after the old man sparked the motivation.

I still can’t believe I never thought of it.

Leaning on the ground I try to do a push-up. I don’t remember doing a successful round of push-ups back in the day, the best I could do was about two before starting to shake and fall on my face.

"Ugh. So let’s see."

I rub my hands together and hop on the ground.

My body starts to shake as I plank and adjust myself.

My muscles aren’t strong enough to support my body weight. Guess I can’t do this without cheating.

Focus!