Xiatoktok woke gently. He had gone to sleep like he had been coshed by a back alley rough. Waking up felt like thousands of blessed angels had contributed the down from their wings to gently lift him up from the lands of slumber and into the waking world. It was magical. It was so precious.

His eyes fluttered open. He turned to reach for a glass of water. A stack of papers fell on the floor. He looked a little more closely. There was a glass of water there, as instructed. It was penned in by teetering stacks of papers, some reaching three feet in height. It wasn’t that big a table. Some “thoughtful” soul and interleaved various reports, stacking them like bricks or wicker to provide structure. It had to have been more work than just bringing in a second table, but then, he had given instructions for only one side table. Mmm. Hard to say who was to blame here.

Obviously not him. But someone else had clearly screwed up. It really was a nifty bit of paper stacking, though. A whole lot of effort and skill going into achieving something pointless. Xiatoktok debated the likelihood that this person had been punished and forced to practice such a useless skill by a vindictive Xia. It seemed very… on brand.

He drank the water. The bell for the servant was just behind it, in the shadow of monumental reports on… something. He rang. A servant appeared almost immediately.

“How may I be of service, President?”

“Prop me up, I wish to read in bed. Also do have a light meal sent around. How long was I asleep?”

“Eight hours and two minutes, President.” The servant replied as he tucked some extra cushions under Xiatoktok’s back. “I’m afraid it is the middle of the night.”

Xiatoktok internally sighed. This was going to be a complete pain in the ass, he just knew it.

“Please confirm that the Landau was deep cleaned after Vice President Xiatokte’s trip down to Red Mountain. Instruct the stable hands that it is to be ready for my use at a moment’s notice any time in the coming week. Has my wife or concubine been by?”

The servant smiled slightly. “They are in the next room. They insisted on having beds made up for them, and have left instructions that your bed is to be moved to the shared room as soon as you are up and mobile.”

Xiatokte lightly frowned. “Foolishness. We have a perfectly good house with a perfectly good bed. No use having them suffer here.” Inside he was plotting how to spoil them rotten. He fooled no one but himself.

“As you say, President. Any preference for the meal?”

“Oh something light and with sugar or honey. I think I will need the energy.” He looked over at the heaps of paper.”

“At once, President.” The servant bowed and retreated from the room.

Xiatoktok picked a file that had a red tag hanging from it. The words “Read Me First” were written on the tag.

The servant was walking back from the kitchen when he heard the President bellow. “Get Xiatokte in here! NOW!”

“It was Xiatokmai’s idea.” ’Te tried to deflect.

“No, it was my idea, the two of you just got impatient and blew our budget on it.” ’Tok growled.

“’Rou wasn’t going to do it. He was just sitting on his ass and running half hearted patrols a little way around the city.”

“’Rou is a violent psychopath who’s most predatory tendencies are curbed by the constant presence of the other Voices of Reason, as well as the Business Council’s heavy oversight. A couple of weeks of boredom would have seen him doing almost the same things.”

“They put you in a fucking coma, Old Man! That was the moment to push them hard. All of them- the Council, the GNUF, the Collective. They expected us to lash out, so we did. Now we are cleaning up all sorts of rats.” ’Te gave up on deflection and turned to a counter-attack.

“We are, yes. Say, do you recall how we had to literally change the financial future of this entire epoch just to plug the last budget hole we had? It was ages ago, I know. Why, that hole’s been plugged for weeks now.”

“Thought of that. It only matters if we actually pay the contracts.”

“’Te.” All traces of humor vanished from Xiatoktok’s face. “They are Blade Orders. They have to be paid. That’s the whole point of Blade Orders. The whole Clan is on the hook to pay them. And we, and more specifically I, am on the hook for putting the Clan on the hook. Because it’s my name on the order. So you can see why I am slightly peeved.”

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“Yeah, that’s why we had to use ‘em. ’Rou is paranoid enough that he’s not going to move casually, and he certainly isn’t going to stir an extra inch without getting paid.” ’Te pushed harder. “He’s not a psychopath, ’Tok. He just plays one in public. He’s a thug made good. He’s made a lifetime business model of preying on the weak and sucking up to the powerful. Offering him the opportunity to let his sadism run wild and get paid for it AND look good in front of the Clan? He couldn’t resist.”

“So what! So what, ’Te? What about this helps? How do you think it fixes the money problem, or the “alienating everyone within five hundred miles of here” problem?”

“Because he over-fucking-did it. The orders were to kill people, not start randomly hanging suspected collaborators. Did you know he’s started putting horseshoes on people? Literally nailing them to people’s feet?”

“Oh gods, another “reliable fact?””

“This one is actually real. He declared that since they liked running so much, he would make it easier on them.”

“Fantastic.” ’Tok growled, looking increasingly murderous. “I have spent the last year, and a personal fortune, improving the standing of the Xia in the North West. This prick is pissing it away in days.”

“He is. You should do something about it.”

There was a lull.

“How exactly did you and ’Mai plan to… resolve this situation if I didn’t wake up in time?”

“Same way you are going to, only with way less clout and moral authority.”

“Haah. How far along is ’Mai’s project?”

Te waved at the huge stack of interleaved papers next to the bed. “I was going to give you the rest of the things you asked for later. This is all the supporting paperwork she assembled.”

’Tok looked at the small mountain of paper, and sighed. “Alright. Schedule me a meeting with the Patriarch’s Butler.”

Xiatoktok looked out the window as the dawn slowly peeked up. He knew he only had a few more minutes of consciousness, and he couldn’t be bothered to spend them on official business. He just wanted to watch the sun rise, and let his thoughts flick past.

’Ja and Gentian walked in wearing their night clothes. They smiled and embraced him. He embraced them too. Nobody spoke, not wanting to break the stillness of the moment. He patted Gentian a little. “Assassinations aren’t all that common. Just so you know. I don’t want you getting the wrong impression.”

She choked and started sputtering. “Not that common? So they are somewhat common? Should I get an extra doormat saying “We are not at home for assassinations today?”

’Tok airly waved her off. “Nonsense. Where would you even buy such a doormat?”

“You are quite right. I will have it specially made.”

’Ja nodded approvingly. “We can look over fonts and materials together. Might make a nice change of pace in the evenings.”

“You two are ridiculous.” ’Tok said severely. Then he quieted. “I love you both very much. I… know I don’t say it much. But I do. Love you both. Very much.”

“We love you too.” ’Ja said quietly.

“We do. A happy surprise, in my case.” Gentian said with a hint of mischief.

“Oh don’t get me started! ’Ja, I want you to know that this is entirely your fault.”

“It is. And I am damn proud of it.” She nodded.

Xiatoktok threw up his hands. “Corruption! I am surrounded by corruption in my own home!” Gentian leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“It’s all right. We can all be corrupt together.”

“Hrrmph!” He grumped mightily. They humored him. They were good that way.

“We are moving you home, by the way.”

“Dearest, I cannot. I have to be here. There are too many balls I have to keep in the air to step away.”

“No, you don’t. We will have a room made up for your secretaries to sleep in. They can do shifts. You will work from your office at home, and messengers will run at lightning speeds between you and the bank. It will all work out.” ’Ja was firm on this.

“I can assure you, your secretaries will have absolutely no problems with this. At all. We may have a hard time getting them to leave again afterwards.” Gentian’s voice was dry. But then, she was speaking from experience.

“I will chase them out with a broom, if necessary.” Xiatoktok grumbled. They all took a moment to imagine that. Him in his elegant, creaseless robes, waving a broom made of bundled branches as he tried to shoo away seductive secretaries.

“Alright I want to see that.” Gentian nodded.

“Agreed.” ’Ja nodded. “Should we get him a dust pan? Or is that too much?”

“Too much. Just the broom. And maybe an apron.”

“I take it back. I hate you both and you are terrible.”

“Well, we love you anyhow.” Gentian grinned. Xiatoktok yawned.

“I won’t be awake much longer. Let’s have a meal when I wake up.”

“It will be waiting for you.” ’Ja said softly.

She was wrong about that. What was waiting for him was, instead, a letter. The Patriarch would see him. Now.