Vanya had never felt so little. She was standing in Cecil’s kitchen, her eyes lowered observing the intricate pattern of wood covering the floor beneath her feet. For someone of such power, she felt truly powerless. There was nothing she could do besides stare at her own two feet while Carmin strode across the kitchen with her head held high.
Rhohaz stood a good distance away from Vanya. She observed him from the corner of her eye. His hand had formed a tight fist around the seashell he had plucked out of her own hands only moments ago. She expected him to have his head low just like she had, just as he always did. Yet she was surprised to find him with his chin up, his shoulders open and wide, waiting for Carmin to say the first words.
“I didn’t expect to find the two of you here,” Carmin spoke dipping a finger in a slice of apple pie that Vanya had cut and left on the kitchen table. Vanya cringed seeing Carmin lick it off and leave the pie there, “I suppose the rumors are true then…” she turned to Rhohaz ignoring Vanya was even in the room.
“...that you are courting this…” she lifted the same finger and pointed to Vanya as if pointing to an animal, not looking her way once, “...outsider.”
Vanya only thought the word ‘outsider’ was Carmin being decent. She had no doubt Carmin would have used a much harsher word if she had not been around for this conversation.
Rhohaz narrowed his eyes at Carmin. His chin, unexpectedly, still up, “That is not true. It’s only a silly rumor,” he spoke loud and clear.
Carmin paused for a moment observing his posture then sighed in relief. It was perhaps the only time anyone saw Carmin smile so satisfied.
“Oh! Well, thank heavens! For a moment there I thought it was all true…” she patted Rhohaz’s shoulder to continue, “...I knew it was not the case. I knew you would not disappoint us in such a way, Rhohaz. You are truly your father’s son. Now, dispel the useless rumor once and for all.”
‘The useless rumor’ did not sound as if Carmin was only speaking about the rumor itself. Vanya felt Carmin’s words be directed towards her. She felt Carmin strip her dignity, not even acknowledging her presence while talking to Rhohaz about getting rid of her.
However, before Carmin could leave Rhohaz pressed on, “But Aunt Carmin, it's a harmless rumor. Why should I spend time bothering about squashing it if it's so useless and insignificant in the first place?”
It was clear as day that Carmin did not expect Rhohaz to speak a word in her presence. She looked at him puzzled as if she just discovered he could actually speak and voice his opinion. She narrowed her eyes in question, unable to figure out what he was trying to get at.
“Are you questioning me, nephew?”
“Not in the slightest, I am simply offering a different perspective. Why spend time and energy trying to get rid of a harmless, useless rumor when it would disappear on its own given enough time? I’m sure you and the council would have me worry about better things than this.”
The room froze after Rhohaz’s comment. Carmin eyed him like a lion about to pounce on its prey. She stayed silent observing him cross his arms and wait for her to respond.
Carmin, for the first time, turned to Vanya, who immediately lowered her gaze seeing the wretched woman look to her.
“Girl, leave us, now,” she spoke in a low tone.
Vanya scrambled almost knocking some of the apple pie off the table. She immediately nodded and stepped up to leave when Rhohaz quite blatantly, almost wanting to step on Carmin’s toes, spoke to Vanya.
“Can you check on Timmie? He should be napping outside on the bench,” Rhohaz sounded so free, his posture relaxed and confident as opposed to how Vanya first saw him at the council, hunched over and scared to speak a word.
She nodded to him, taken aback by his confidence, and passed through the gap between him and the kitchen table to reach the back door and scurry out.
She found Timmie fallen off the bench, his body on the ground, and his head pillowed by mud. She got to him and tried waking him as silently as possible while listening to Carmin whispering, only a wall blocking Vanya’s view. She then heard Carmin and Rhohaz leave the kitchen, with the sound of their footsteps fading away.
“Timmie, come on. You can’t sleep on the ground now,” Vanya tried nudging Timmie as hard as she could but he did not budge once. Exhausted from trying to lift his limbs in an attempt to carry him and set him on the bench, Vanya gave up halfway through letting herself rest on the bench that was supposed to have the man on the ground on it instead.
She stayed there baffled at what she just witnessed. She had never seen Rhohaz so confident before, that too in front of Carmin. She thought he’d be meek and silent. Yet he looked as if he was ready to fight. She wondered what it was that made him act so different. She wanted to know the mysterious reason that was making him act so poised.
She was about to settle into her train of thoughts that led her to wonder what Carmin said to Rhohaz when she heard tiny footsteps come up behind her. She turned to see Jac, in a neat green suit that was far too big on him, standing there barely reaching her shoulders.
“I’ve found you, once again,” he said excitedly to which Vanya smiled naturally.
“Yes, you did. Did you and your family just get in?” she asked for she did not recollect seeing Jac or his father around before.
He simply nodded with a confident smile. Right after, he dug into his pocket and held his hand out eagerly.
Vanya looked at him, puzzled, then realized he wanted her to hold out her hand as well. She held her palm out to have him place yet another small wooden carving there. This time it was in the shape of a tree.
She gulped, for the last one turned to sand the moment Jac was out of her view.
Jac waited for her to say something, waited for her to praise his creation.
“Thank you, Jac. It looks so beautiful.”
He smiled with his teeth out like a child so happy to be praised by an adult for his efforts. And to Vanya’s surprise, he turned around immediately to start walking away in content.
Vanya stood hurriedly and spoke aloud to get him to halt.
“Jac, wait….I…” she held the wooden carving up seeing Jac turn to look at her, listening, “...The one you gave me before, the carving…it…” she hesitated unable to decide if the next few words were even worth uttering to a child for she herself did not know if she saw right, “...the carving turned to sand. Yes, yes, that’s right! It turned to sand. Will this disappear just as the previous one did?”
She paused shocked she was even questioning little Jac, thinking she was probably making a fool out of herself. Yet she waited for him to react to her question for he seemed frozen in time for a moment. And then he smiled, as if he had for the first time in his life, felt seen.
“They told me you were a clever one,” he spoke with his little hands clasping in joy.
“Who? The sea?”
“Yes, of course! You remember well. That one too will turn to sand once I am no longer near you. And if you keep that sand together without separating them too much, it will turn back into wood whenever I am close by.”
Vanya’s eyes shot open in shock mixed with a hint of fear. She wondered if it was true, if it was truly as Jac was explaining. A substance couldn't change so drastically in the blink of an eye with no external interferences. Alchemy was banned along with anything that resembled unexplainable transformation of materials in the Northern Kingdom. Occult sciences was what Vanya’s father called it, usually with a clear distaste engulfing his mouth. This was one of the major reasons why anyone who aimed to perform magic was hunted nearly two decades ago.
Vanya looked to Jac, who had already turned around humming along to himself, and started walking down the path toward the backyard where everyone was gathered.
He disappeared around the corner making Vanya focus on the wooden carving on her palm. She waited staring at it, listening to Timmie let out a loud snore startling her.
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And then, without a warning, the wooden carving turned to sand before her eyes. She did not even realize when it turned until some of the sand fell through her fingers and onto the earth, making her gasp in frustration. She wanted to gather the sand and keep it safe, perhaps test it out one day, but it had already spread away leaving her no choice but to dump the rest of it as well.
***
It wasn’t long before Joan found Vanya babysitting Timmie, who was fast asleep while on the ground as if he was sleeping on a dreamy cloud. Joan laughed harder than Vanya had ever seen her before. She then kicked Timmie awake.
Vanya thought Timmie would rise in rage ready to murder Joan but he only shuddered himself awake and sat up to greet the ladies.
“You look awful,” Joan spoke while crouched over picking up the debris Timmie had collected in his wispy blonde hair.
He thanked her while yawning and rubbing his eyes so rough Vanya thought his eyeballs would roll off any moment now.
They got him to look a bit presentable with his shirt tucked in, although the red stains from the spilled wine were displaying themselves as he had just come off the battlefield, and went along to join the crowd in the backyard.
Soon, Tilly had Joan running off to do another errand leaving Vanya to stand with Timmie.
“Oh ho! She’s caught him already?” Timmie whispered eyeing Carmin and Rhohaz at a corner.
Vanya whipped her head around to catch a glimpse. She was surprised to see Rhohaz was still having his head held high, talking animatedly with his hands, and his stance as confident as she had ever seen before. She saw his fist still balled up. He was still holding onto the seashell.
“Does he usually talk back…to Carmin?” Vanya whispered back, curious to know the sudden change in Rhohaz’s demeanor.
Timmie raised his brows in surprise, “Talk back to Carmin? No one talks back to Carmin, least of all Rhohaz. Why? What did you hear while I was asleep? Don’t tell me I missed something of great importance.”
Timmie looked to Vanya, eager to hear anything that would let him keep himself occupied for a few days. Vanya bit her lip anxiously yet went for it, “You know the rumor you and Cecil created?--”
“The one where Rhohaz is wooing you? Sorry, I’m sure Rhohaz apologized already. It’s just we like a bit of excitement now and then, even when it's not entirely true,” Timmie was quick to accept.
Vanya rolled her eyes and huffed yet continued, “Well, Carmin asked him to get rid of it and he…he essentially said he had better things to do than dispel a rumor.”
Time gasped and clasped his hands on his mouth. That was the last reaction Vanya expected out of Timmie.
“He spoke back to…to Carmin?” Timmie whispered grabbing onto Vanya’s hands.
“Stop reacting that way,” Vanya gritted her teeth noticing a few heads turn towards them.
“I’m sorry, Jade, dear. If you know Rhohaz like I do, you’d know he would never, and when I say never, never cross his elders. He would never talk back to them. I have never seen him even remotely whisper a question about their directions. This…this has never happened. And with Carmin too…” Timmie looked to Rhohaz eagerly but his eyes faded to worry, “...Do you think he is sick? Perhaps a life-threatening disease he’s hiding from us?”
Vanya looked at Timmie baffled. Timmie flipped between emotions faster than she had seen anyone do so. Yet she narrowed her gaze wondering if Timmie was right, that something might have changed in Rhohaz to have someone who had grown up with him to worry about this minute change in personality.
Just then, Garin joined. His sea-green eyes smiled at Vanya. She only nodded, unable to fully digest he was indeed Carmin’s son.
“What is it, Timmie?” Garin asked, following Timmie's gaze to see Rhohaz still fully engrossed in getting some point across to Carmin.
Timmie hummed, “I think…I’m in love with Rhohaz.”
Vanya nudged him trying to get him out of the clouds. But to her surprise, Garin joined him, “I can understand. I fell for him first when he caught me before I bashed my head against a rock tumbling down a steep hill.”
Timmie gasped and continued, “I thought it was just me. He held me with one arm before I fell off the roof that one time. My heart has never been the same since.”
They paused for a moment only to start laughing heartily the next.
Vanya couldn’t help but chuckle along with the boys.
It must have been their loud laughter, both Carmin and Rhohaz looked at them. Carmin narrowed her eyes at her son, who immediately excused himself and separated from Timmie and Vanya. But Rhohaz only looked to Vanya seeing her smiling from ear to ear. And Vanya did not catch his gaze at all, missing him entirely.
Seeing Carmin’s hawk eyes on Garin linger much longer, both Timmie and Vanya turned away the very next moment not wanting her siren eyes on them too.
“I’m guessing Garin is as afraid of his mother as everyone else is in this village?” Vanya whispered to Timmie. She felt a special sense of camaraderie with him, almost like he had crossed a boundary that night with him being silly and embarrassingly drunk and helpless.
“Oh yes, there’s no question about it. Even my father, who is quite the self-assured prick you could meet, is deathly afraid of Carmin…” Timmie caught Vanya’s shock in how he addressed his own father, “...Oh please, he’s the reason half of the village hates me now. Cecil wouldn’t dare talk to me like she used to back then, even Kev and Stu hold back their words whenever I am around, and Roza…”
He paused, his despair growing larger the longer he held on.
“What happened? I heard you were best friends,” the words slipped out of Vanya’s mouth before she could stop herself.
“I was her best friend, indeed. And I betrayed her, all to please my father. All to finally be acknowledged by my own father, only to lose perhaps the most important person in my life.”
She saw Timmie, his smirk wiped off his face and his usually bright eyes turned to sadness. It was like the sun that hid itself below the horizon only moments ago stole Timmie’s light away as well. He was serious, his jaw clenching as if he wanted to let it all out, release himself from the guilt altogether.
“I’m sure Roza will understand, one day,” Vanya said, hoping to ease his pain. But he only stayed silent.
It may have been a moment or perhaps hours that Timmie just stayed next to Vanya hunched over and sulking on his own. She tried to speak to him, get him to be normal again but it didn’t quite help until Joan came along and tried poking Timmie till he cracked a smile.
That too however vanished as Timmie’s father approached them.
“Time to go home, son. Come along,” his gruff voice instructed Timmie, who rolled his eyes yet listened and walked away with a slight nod as a greeting to Vanya and Joan.
With the darkness washing over the sky, everyone gathered was also heading out with last greetings of congratulations to Cecil and Ronal being said as they disappeared around the corner and down the hill.
Vanya and her company were the last few to leave that night. With an empty basket each, Vanya and Joan intertwined their hands as they followed Rhohaz and Tilly down the hill waving back at Cecil and Ronal.
Rhohaz peeked behind to see Vanya smiling. He held his hand up to say something yet changed his mind and turned ahead to keep at it while following slow Tilly.
He assisted Tilly, who was too old to trot down a steep path with the sunlight no longer showing her the way. He carried her over to the flat land and held his hand out for the girls for assistance as well.
“Thank you, Rhohaz,” Joan spoke as she grabbed Rhohaz’s forearm and made her way to Tilly below.
Vanya held her breath waiting for her turn. She did not want to look at him, straight in the eyes, partly feeling as if she would show the slight admiration that was blossoming in her after seeing him so confident with Carmin earlier, almost defending her in Carmin’s presence although not directly.
He turned back to look straight into her eyes without a warning. Vanya jumped in surprise immediately looking away as if she caught a falling star in the sky.
“Come on,” Rhohaz held his hand out for her. She went for his forearm just as Joan did but stopped feeling his palm grab onto hers.
“I–” she merely sounded something in shock seeing him pull her ahead leading her down the slope and right below where Tilly and Joan had started back on their way home.
He held onto her palm for a moment longer making Vanya blush and then let go leaving something on her skin so she could hold on to it.
“It’s yours now,” he whispered. Vanya felt the seashell back in her palm.
“I wasn’t stealing–” she felt she had to say it, drive her point home once more, but she only stopped by herself seeing Rhohaz wearing a gentle smile with his pale eyes, softened, gazing into hers.
“I going to assume you are still going to report to me about Roza then? Be my spy?” He asked, again in a whisper, with his eyes taking a quick glance at Tilly and Joan moving further from them.
“I thought you didn’t want me to.”
“Not if you insist on it,” Rhohaz spoke, shocking Vanya.
“Should I insist on it?” Vanya retorted, still baffled he, who was against the idea from the beginning, was suddenly wanting to go ahead with it.
The corner of his mouth curved to smirk, “If you’d like to. You should report to me every night with your findings.”
Vanya took a moment to eye him seeing him so openly going along with her idea, then huffed, “Did you hit your head somewhere?”
Rhohaz let out a laugh, “I’ll see you every night then.”
It was not just Vanya who felt something in the kitchen earlier that day. A slight unease, a pitter-patter of the heart, being drawn to something that was made of curiosity mixed with excitement. Rhohaz felt it in his bones, the confidence oozing out of his body, making him do things he would not dare do. He had no idea where the boost of confidence came from, almost like he reached the light at the end of the tunnel and that light enveloped him whole, all at once.
He had dreamt of such a day. A day where he would speak his mind with Carmin, not be nervous and hold himself back. And even with standing his ground and not shying away from holding a conversation with Carmin while the entire village eyed them flabbergasted at his role switch, it was now, speaking with Vanya, did he feel himself be an utter nervous wreck.