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Shadows in the Dawn Mist
7. The Good Life

7. The Good Life

The passing of several more weeks had helped her settle even more into her comfortable routine in the castle. The sense of otherness seemed to have retreated somewhat and Serenity began to wonder if it was even there at all. Had she allowed the strangeness of her new life to spook her so completely? It was possible but she could not convince herself of this reasoning. What she had felt, it was unsettling. Dangerous. The incident in the garden…

Regardless she was comfortable in the castle. Perhaps too comfortable. Her own chamber to share with Osgar, breakfast with Sir Robert, friends and healthy activity in the castle. She loved being in the kitchens but her absolute favourite was to watch the men train. They were so skilful and hardworking, very rare in men from her time. They trained with the assurance that their skills would save their life of the lives of those they cared for. To her it was a noble and natural skill to acquire.

She wanted to train but daren't broach the subject. All the men here were so protective and, she feared, a little arrogant believing she would not need to learn. They would protected her and the others. Perhaps she was doing them an injustice thinking so but she didn't want to risk insulting them. It did not stop her secretly learning what little she could from good old observation and the young solider-in-training, Lord Gwain who trained her late at night in the gardens. Well a girl should be prepared.

Serenity was happy here, and things had improved, but she could never quite shake the feeling of being watched, but she could never pin it down. The incident in the garden, especially, rattled her. It was disturbing and each time she began to feel unsettled, she would remember her dreams. While disturbing, they reminded her of her real home in her time and she felt a deep sadness. Would she ever get back? And if she did, would she ever be content know all she had left behind in the past? Osgar was like her very own child and the people of the keep had become her family. She loved them all and was sure they loved her too. And Robert de Montford…

Serenity was distracted from her wandering thoughts by a horse and rider galloping into the bailey. It must be a messenger, Sir Robert was always receiving messages. He was a powerful and well liked Lord with many duties and responsibilities. Moving over to the new arrivals, she tended to the most beautiful grey gelding she had ever seen. The messenger ran off but she barely registered her departure as she and the stable hands set about caring for the horse. Horses. They were the only thing in her new life she could truly lose herself in. When she was with horses, it was the only time she was not constantly searching for that thing that haunted her or trying to deal with the constant thoughts whirling in her mind. Thinking about why she was here, about home... Sighing contentedly, she grabbed a brush and got lost in the rhythmic stokes of grooming the beautiful grey gelding.

***

Serenity. So like her name, as she had proven in the weeks since they first met. He watched her from his room as she came to the gardens and roamed contentedly, glancing around every now and then for Osgar. She was like a rock, calm but strong and immovable. She nurtured the boy and all within his keep, even his men in ways he had never considered. She tended to wounds of body and mind, encouraging, comforting or just listening. She had become their confidant and a wise advisor. She was smart and thoughtful, fair and just. She loved to be in the kitchens and there was always a rush for the food she made. She brought order and relaxed authority to everything she did, efficient yet not intrusive. And she got on well with the servants who looked up to her. Thank goodness for that, he needed a peaceful home with the life he led. He was amazed at how swiftly she had settled in his heart.

His only concern was the glint of something in her eyes, as if she was always on edge, ready to flee or fight. It saddened him, he wanted her to be at home here, maybe even make it her true home… well and why not? She fit in perfectly, not like the spoiled, timid or stupid maids he was accustomed to. His enquiries had led nowhere, no one knew of her or her father and the Lord she had claimed an acquaintance with was senile and fast approaching his end. No answers there. He was satisfied that she had no guardian and he wanted to become her protector, her rock. She was so strong but she never really let anyone in, let them be her strength. He was determined, he just had to court her and convince her of what he already felt. They belonged together.

Robert's steward approached bearing a message for him. Opening the missive, he read his orders. A Saxon band had been reported attacking Norman lands and strongholds. He was ordered by the King to hunt them out and end it. Save some only for answers and information. Sigh. Robert was wary and weary of such tasks, but he needed to protect his lands and people. And Serenity. He would be extra careful this time, no knave would dishonour him again. He must come back safely, too much was at stake, too much to lose this time.

Rising from his desk, he set about making arrangements for this new mission. Soldiers, supplies and protection for his home and all within. He'd tell Serenity now. He didn't like leaving her, it would be the first they were separated and his heart hurt to think of her in danger and him not being there to rescue her. Hopefully it would not be too long before his work was done.

***

"How long will you be gone?"

Serenity's brow creased with concern and she contemplated the men making last checks in the bailey. The messenger yesterday had brought bad news and new orders for the Lord of the keep. Considering how his last orders had turned out, Serenity could not help but feel worried. In addition, she was not convinced the keep was wholly safe, the thing had not gone away as she had hoped, but neither had it done anything. This might be just the opportunity it was waiting for. She felt ridiculous, she wasn't even sure if this thing was real or even tangible to any but her.

"I'm not sure but I won't be gone long. If we don't have them within two sennights, we will return to restock and strategize. You needn't fear, I'm leaving plenty of men to protect you and the keep. Just don't leave until I get back and don't let any unknowns in understand?"

Serenity nodded. What else could she do? Picking up Osgar who had run to her side, she gave a quick curtsy and Osgar grinned at the tall Lord. He mounted and gave a signal, his men mounting up quickly and falling into formation behind him. He looked at her and grinned, putting his heels to the charger under him and surging out of the keeps gate following by his warriors. She watched until they had all exited and the gates were secured behind them. Running up to the battlements with Osgar she continued to watch until they disappeared from sight. A cold, empty feeling settled in her stomach. When would she see them again? Her family. Steeling herself, she turned, endeavouring to maintain her life, her routine while they were gone.

"Come on Osgar, let's bake some sweetmeats" she went off humming a happy tuned, eyelashes veiling her true thoughts.

***

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The Shadow watched too as the men departed, satisfied with his work. He would have liked to follow and cause more destruction like last time but now he had found her, he would never let her out of his sight. Now that the Lord was out of the way, he could begin his entrapment. Besides, there was plenty of destruction to reap right here in the lands of Lord Robert de Montford. He would enjoy that so very much. He allowed the shadows in his heart to consume him further and revelled in the power they gave him. It wasn't hate, he simply loved to watch the world fall apart around him, delighted in the fear and panic it induced. Chaos and destruction were all he desired and to watch those around him come to embrace it like he had. So he was no longer alone. More. He needed more. And he needed her. It would not be long now.

***

Six days. It had been quiet yet everyone was a little on edge. With all that had happened lately, things were just a little cautious with Robert away. He was well loved and everyone prayed for his swift and safe return. Serenity found herself distracted from her normal routine, but couldn't say why. Osgar was doing so well, gaining confidence along with his new skills. Eloquence, manners, and of course his ever growing knowledge of all thing knights. Soon he would be old enough to begin his lessons. He was even beginning to become more social.

The keep was productive and safe and the regular messages from Robert or his allies held no ill news. Even her faint homesickness and unease had not bothered her of late, yet still, something nagged at her. The waiting felt… pregnant, as if something were imminent. Sitting in her solar, she had hoped the quiet would help her focus.

The door opened, and Osgar’s head peeked around. When he saw her, his eyes lit up and he scampered across the room to sit with her. Smiling, Serenity scooped him up and sat him on her lap. It was amazing how well he had coped and adjusted. Resting her chin on his head, Serenity frowned. What would happen to him when she disappeared?

“’Ren’tee”

She smiled. He still couldn’t say her name properly. “Yes Osgar?”

“May we go see knights now?”

“But we normally go in the afternoon don’t we. And what about helping cook? Are we not doing that today?”

The little boy frowned adorably as he thought about his options. Serenity knew about his growing fascination with Roberts knights and his increasing interest in joining them.

“Kitchen tomorrow? I want see Gwain. Please?”

“Alright. Run down and tell cook we can’t make it today. Then we’ll go and find Gwain.”

Osgar was already across the room. He was so excited, Serenity was happy to see it. She smiled wanly, so tired today. She sighed and closed her eyes.

The images flowed fast, unrelenting. Standing in the mist, the shadows surrounded her. No longer faint, she could see the gaunt faces and horrendous wounds. Blood dripped and voices moaned in pained screams. She could not find relief. They reached for her, holding her in place and the bloodied mud cling to her. In her hair and on the hem of her dress, the weight was unbearable. She couldn't breathe. Searching for escape, she saw something amidst the shadows. Immovable, it stood, a solid darkness so deep she felt it tug at her, trying to drag her within. Looking closer, she saw chains extend from the darkness to ensnare the shadows, dragging them toward it and they reached for her… for help. She grabbed a hand and pulled, desperately trying to free a shadow but the chain held firm. Exhausted, unable to move, she held on unwilling to let go. Glancing again at the darkness it seemed to expand and grow, dragging more towards it but within, faintly something emerged. All stilled as the darkness resolved into a figure. Faint and blurred, the face turned to look at her and Serenity was afraid. The darkness was…

Her eyes flew open and she sat up in her chair, breathing hard. She had not been asleep, but the images were not her imagination. The shadows she had been afraid of her whole life were trying to talk to her. They were enslaved, tortured and chained. They were reaching out to her and she could not leave them as they were. She had to help…

***

“Relax your shoulders. Good, My Lady. Stop. That’s enough for today.”

Serenity relaxed and lowered the sword gently. She re-sheathed it and turned to her mentor, Gwain, with a grin. She was so happy.

“So Gwain, how am I doing?”

“Better and better My Lady. You are becoming quite accomplished. Now all you need is the strength, and practice. We are lucky to have my old training sword, or you would not have been able to lift wield it half so well as you do.”

Serenity laughed quietly. These late night training session had become one of her favourite times of day. Gwain was great company and a patient and understanding teacher. And it felt great to do something to protect herself. She felt empowered. And she had always loved swords. They were fascinating.

They always practiced in the gardens after dark, away from prying eyes, hidden by shrubbery. Gwain had set up four or five torches to light them, but it was still dim. Sometimes, Gwain had her practice in the dark to hone her other senses and teach her not to be distracted.

“Thank you Gwain. You’re are a wonderful teacher. I still have so much to learn though.”

“It will come with practice My Lady. Of which I am glad, for you shall have to protect me when Lord de Montford finds out what I have been doing. Now come, we should finished for tonight.”

Serenity, smiled again at Gwains comments. It took some convincing to get him to agree to this and it continued to be a conversation between them. Serenity headed inside, tiredness setting in. She should sleep well tonight.

***

Serenity came out of her slumber into awareness swiftly but not alarmed. She was unsure what had awoken her in the middle of the night. The moon was big and high in the sky and she glanced out her uncovered window. Over the last month and a half, she had become accustomed to the castle and all that came with living in it, noise, light and smells, though she had yet to conform to the ideals of a Lady. Doubt she ever would. This was not her time and she would always be different. Different speech, different priorities, different way of thinking.

That difference had her climbing out of bed and slipping on her boots and a cloak instead of alerting a guard. Slowly she made her way along corridors and down stairs, pausing every now and then to listen and watch, following some instinct in her search for that which woke her. At the edge of the Great hall, which was uncharacteristically empty thanks to the current campaign, she listened and waited. Minutes passed but nothing revealed itself to her. Sighing and resigned to the fact that her feelings were wrong, Serenity turned to head back up to her chamber.

Suddenly, from the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of the light and movement and before she could react, she was surround, held fast and gaged. They had made no sound and as she struggled, they swiftly and efficiently hustled her through the kitchen and out the door into the grounds. Serenity saw guards all along their path, inert on the ground and she fear for them. Her struggles increased but to no avail, they simply held her tighter and she depleted her energy. Suddenly relaxing with a huff, she tried to look around gleaning what information she could. It was not much, maybe six or seven men made up the party who had so expertly kidnapped her. And why would they do that? Hardly anyone knew she was at Roberts castle. Huh, "Robert", funny how quickly he had become so familiar to her. Drawn from her musings by the decreased pace of her bearers, she realised what had bothered her about them that she had not registered until now. They were not Norman…

At the back of her mind, she felt relief. History may not be the most accurate medium but all agreed that the Normans could have a nasty, brutal streak in them, especially the Norman Lords from this time. Something about war must bring out the old Viking blood in them, laced with French passion and the arrogance of the wealthy. She had not seen much, but she feared history had been right this time, with Robert and his ilk the exception. But that begged the question again, who where they and why had the kidnapped her? A sickening thought occurred. Perhaps they sought retribution for the events surrounding her arrival and thought her proximity to Robert would harm him or give them advantage… but surely they would have just killed her or ransacked the castle. They had gotten in and she was still alive so what- ?

Serenity's thought were rudely interrupted when she was roughly, but not unkindly, plopped down on the cold hardened ground. The men immediately stood a little away and conversed quietly. She took the opportunity to push the gag out of her mouth with her tongue, ignoring the coarse texture and unpleasant taste. She didn't want to think about what is was made from. Finally clear of the obstruction, she tried to listen in to her surroundings. It was only then that Serenity realised they were speaking old English and all her conversation until then, with Robert and all those in the castle, had been in French. And they likely thought she didn't understand them…

"She is not what we expected"

"No"

"Is that good for us or bad?"

"I don't know yet, but we can use her"

"What do you think Aelfwine?"

"Quiet!"

"…"

"She could be dangerous. We don't know what to expect now…"

"Ahem." At her gentle throat clearing the men turned to her. In the bright moonlight she could see they were all on the younger side of adult. Not juvenile but none older than 25. And only one had the hardened body of a tried warrior. She tried to appear non-threatening but not weak. She spoke to them in their own language, an old form of English as familiar to her as French and the many other languages she spoke and studied.

"Well met. I am Serenity Neville. Since you went to the trouble of kidnapping me, I'm hopeful that you have no intention of killing me. But that begs the question, what do you want from me? If I can help, I will."

Stunned and sceptical silence met her little announcement. The youngest of them seemed to swing from awe to fear while the single warrior merely stared at her in a thoughtful scowl. Serenity tried to be patient, and sat quietly, benignly watching the warrior.