A few days later, Serenity and Osgar were quietly talking in the Great Hall, watching the people work, when a messenger ran in, going straight to Sir Robert. One of many, she assumed, considering the many that had been sent out, searching for the traitor, information… and her father. She knew the last would yield no result but it was the two others that concerned her. Not only did she wish to understand why these good people were haunted by that day, why this unknown would do this, but she hoped that the answers would answer her questions as to why she was here. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't remember what happened after she sat at her desk.

Intent on the messenger and Sir Robert's reactions to the news, she did not notice the muscled soldier beside her until he quietly cleared his throat. She should have been more attentive. She had noticed Osgar was somewhat leery around certain soldiers, he probably saw them that day. She feared he did not fully understand the circumstances and would grow bitter and vengeful living here. She could understand his pain but prayed he would understand the event. It would not be healthy for him to grow up in hatred.

Looking to the soldier, briefly glancing at Osgar, she smiled gently at the obviously uncomfortable man. He shifted his weight, cleared his throat again and finally settled, looking her in the eye.

"Forgive me, my Lady, for interrupting you but… I have heard that you sometimes speak with the men. May I…” Serenity nodded for him to continue. “My Lady, I am a seasoned soldier, I have been in many battles. You do not forget the ones you have killed but always I have acted with honour for my Lord and for my own conscience. But… I am plagued by the memories of that day. Of my actions. It was not right my Lady. Not a battle at all, just slaughter. How do I live with this?"

The anguish in the man's eyes and voice pierced her heart. Standing, she placed her hand on his arm lightly. Unsure what she could do, she simply looked into his eyes and spoke the truth.

"This was not your fault. You must accept that these were not your actions. You were not in control. In all your soldiering never have you ever acted this way before, correct? The very fact that this troubles you shows you to be an honourable man. Face the memories knowing this and they will fade. You may never forget, indeed, I do not believe you should. But do not dwell on this or it will destroy you. Live to honour those who died, and to ensure such things never happen again. Fight to protect any weaker than you. You cannot change what has happened, it will always be a part of you but you can choose how it affects your life. You can let it destroy you or you can overcome it and be a better man for it. For now, live one day at a time… Already Lord De Montford searches for the conspirator. See?"

She indicated Sir Robert and the messenger. Sensing a change in the man, she quickly thought of an idea.

"Perhaps, you may find some purpose, some relief, in the coming search. Mayhap you should speak to My Lord about it. I'm sure he would understand."

Smiling again, she gently squeezed his arm and encouraged him towards Sir Robert. He gave her a grateful smile and headed away from her. Before he got far she called,

"Wait Sir, your name?"

"I have the honour of sharing the name of our King, William."

"Sir William, if you feel the need to talk again, I should be most happy to obliged. I'd like to know how you fare."

He smiled again and left to pursue his peace. She feared there would be many more like him.

***

Days turned into weeks and Serenity watched and waited, never quite settling. It wasn't that she was uncomfortable or felt unsafe, quite the opposite, she was beginning to feel too comfortable here. Lord De Monftord - Sir Robert- was making a home for her right here and she didn't know how to interpret it. He felt terrible that he could not find her father, but of course he couldn't. Even Serenity was starting to feel like this was her real life… Maybe it was now. It didn't help that she suspected she was falling in love. Which was actually fairly likely when she considered that she was socially inept and her love life was non-existent. Of course she would fall in love with a handsome, capable, noble gentlemen… who was as strong as an ox and could take care of himself. Not to mention that he was responsible, looking after his lands and people who all seemed happy. And he was so gentle with her, completely different from when she first saw him on the battle field. But she didn't like that he was so close to the King. Never trust those with too much power. Especially when they have invaded and conquered a land.

She and Osgar had fallen into an easy routine. The would rise and eat breakfast in the great hall with the castles inhabitants. Most of the time Sir Robert joined them. Then they would spend their days riding, exploring the land around the castle, helping out in the stables or kitchen getting to know the staff and workers. For lunch, sometimes they would take a packed basket out on their rides or to the gardens. Or they would bring their labours from the kitchen and share them in the great hall. Hilda was often near to help with Osgar or act as companion, guide and chaperone to Serenity. In the afternoons, Osgar loved to watch the soldiers and knights train in the bailey. Serenity often found herself speaking with the men who struggled with their memories and conscience. It was difficult to know what to say or do but she did what she could. It was better than nothing.

A particularly loud clang of metal roused Serenity from her musings. Osgar watched enraptured as the soldiers trained. He had grown more confident in that past weeks and spoke a little more every day. Though it was rare that he wandered far from her side. So, inevitably, she found herself often in the training grounds, watching those about her and hoping Osgar would continue to grow in confidence and learn as much as he could. He needed to decide where he wanted to be. She wanted him to be happy but knew that if… when she left, he would need a stable place in this world. She also knew he needed a man's influence in his life. All young boys, young men needed a positive man around to guide them and teach them, who could understand and relate to them. She thought Sir Robert would be a wonderful father figure.

Watching the training with Osgar, Serenity smiled at familiar faces. Many had heard of her encounter on the battle field and respected her. Most were grateful for her actions but some still could not meet her eye or accept her presence. Perhaps they were still ashamed or they simply didn't trust her. She wasn't exactly truthful and little recommended her, a half breed who came out of nowhere with no one to vouch for her. Still the majority trusted Sir Robert and had gotten to know her. As the training continued, one of the older trainees who also watched the soldiers smiled and waves when he got her attention. Gwain. A good young man, Serenity got the impression that he was well off, his clothing was of good quality, though not elaborate, and he had the mannerisms of one she associated with the nobles.

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"Gwain, good morning"

"Good morning My Lady. Master Osgar. And are you both well this morning?"

"Yes thank you Gwain"

“Good morning Gain.” Little Oscars eyes were fixed briefly on the young man before looking back to the training grounds shyly. The two had begun to form a bond and Osgar looked up to Gwain like a big brother, though too shy as yet to really be comfortable.

… Serenity let the companionable silence extend between them as they all continued to watch. How beautiful it was, she couldn't take her eyes off the rippling muscle that swung the glistening swords in arcs… she glanced at Gwain and saw in his face the same emotions that must be on hers and an idea flickered into her mind. She tried to ignore it, it would never work and they would both be disgraced, but the more she tried to deny it, the more the idea stuck. She stared, transfixed at Gwain and, when he noticed, he seemed concerned.

"My Lady? Are you well?

"Gwain…"

Serenity stepped closer and whispered in the young man's ear. When she had finished, she saw the conflict on his face, but he too was tempted.

"Please Gwain. Tonight, in the Gardens a notch after evening meal? Osgar will be asleep by then."

Gwain hesitated then nodded. Serenity smiled and returned her attention to the soldiers, content with her decision. After a time, Serenity tired of the inactivity. She turned to Gwain.

“Gwain, would you be so kind as to watch over Osgar until Hilda collects him? He so loves to watch the training and I know he will be safe and happy with you. I feel the need to walk in the gardens. Mt apologies, I know I ask much of you.”

“Of course My Lady. It would be a pleasure”.

Osgar’s head wiped up to look at her, frowning slightly. “No! Seri stay. Please?”

Serenity smiled and knelt down to face the boy, brushing his hair away from his eyes and stoking his cheek with the back of her hand before enveloping him in a hug. She pulled back to look at his eyes. Though he was not afraid, Serenity was concerned with how dependant he was on her. She knew he needed to start to interact with and trust others. He needed to be okay if she disappeared.

“Osgar, you know Gwain. You like him. And I’ll just be in the Gardens, you can find me if you need to. Don’t you want to stay and watch the training? I’m sure, once everyone is finished, Gwain can show you a little archery or the horses.”

Serenity glanced up to make sure this was okay and Gwain nodded, smiling gently. Osgar frowned and he thought, wrestling with his love of the training and his need for Serenity’s security. Eventually he nodded.

Serenity beamed at him and pulled BIM into another hug. She was so proud of him. She kissed his cheek, turned him back to face the training grounds and made sure he was absorbed before smiling her thanks to Twain and making her way to the Gardens.

It was too nice a day to not be outdoors, and the castle could be horribly dim with only small windows covered in tapestries. Serenity walked a while then decided to find a spot to take in the sun and the beautiful scene the gardeners had created, smell the flowers and herbs that grew in abundance. Sitting on the sun warmed ground Serenity relaxed.

Serenity enjoyed the brief peace in the sunshine. Although her modern knowledge helped her understand the trauma Osgar and the soldiers were going through, knowing how to deal with is wasn't easy. And she so wanted to help them, but she worried she would do or say the wrong thing. When to push and when to back off… she hoped she was doing the right thing. Closing her eyes, she let the residual tensions and worries melt with the sun and drifted into her thoughts.

At first she didn't pay attention to the coolness creeping over her skin. She heard the rustle of leaves and thought the wind would die down. But slowly the coolness turned cold and grew to encompass her yet the sun still shone bright and no breeze touched her. The cold seeped into her bones, her very core and quicker than she could breathe, she froze, paralyzed, unable to move or speak. Then she heard it, not rustling but whispering. Serenity began to panic, this felt wrong… the same feeling she got from that other thing that watched. The otherness continued to hold her imprisoned and her breathing became ragged. She felt herself slipping into unconsciousness but fought it. She had to fight it. Feeling herself fall on her side, something brushed her neck, the world flickered and the darkness slipped so easily into her eyes…

***

He had watched her enter the Garden and smiled. She was finally alone. Finally, after weeks of watching her, watching for his moment, it was finally time. When she sat, he began. He whispered to her, weaving his way into her mind, her subconscious. The idiots of this time would think it magic, but He knew the power of words. Psychology had always fascinated him and, thanks to his studies, he was a master at suggestion and manipulation. His Serenity would not expect this, which was why it would work so well. He whispered to her as he had done for weeks, this time wrapping her up in a blanket of cold, chilling and overwhelming her, urging her to sleep. He whispered to her his devotion and desires for them his plans for the future. And he whispered his suggestions to her. Trust him, love him, join him.

He continued to whisper and watch until she fell to her side. He was there, next to her, his finger under her neck, easing here down as her eyes slid closed. He emerged fully from the foliage and knelt next to her unconscious form. Looking down into her peaceful, sleeping face, he gently traced a line from her forehead down her temple with his finger, brushing her hair from her face, and smiled. Mine. He leaned down so their noses almost touched and her shallow breaths caressed his lips, a shadow of a kiss. He closed his eyes, lowering his head to hers.

Crunch.

He snapped his head to the entrance of the Garden. Damn it! Again they were interrupted. Quickly, He stroked her cheek then melted back into the foliage to watch. Always his Angel was taken from him. No more! He trembled with frustration and his fists clenched in anger, the nails drawing blood. This wasn't working, he had to rethink his plans. She's MINE. He needed a new approach.

***

Robert had been so busy. The reports showed no unrest… that wasn't good. How did they appear out of nowhere, with no sign of training or preparation. They were random and deadly, with no way of predicating their next attack. It was frustrating, but Robert couldn't let it get to him. And he had other duties. Leaving the Great hall, Robert walked down to the bailey and watched his men train and prepare. He was proud of each of them, men he and trained himself and trusted with his life and the lives of those in his care. He spotted little Osgar with young Lord Gwain to the side and walked over to greet them. The young boy was quickly growing, in height and confidence, and Robert was very fond of the lad. He had all but decided to do all he could for the boy. That and Lady Serenity seemed to love him unconditionally. Robert didn't want her hurt or worried, she had already been through so much. Not that one could tell, she was so strong, seemed to cope with everything thrown at her. But he was not blind, he saw the tiredness behind her eyes, and the uneasy air she sometimes felt. Something haunted his little guest and it concerned him…

Enough. She is not yours to protect. Robert struggled to rein in his emotions and thoughts. Thankfully, it seemed he gave no outward sign of his unrest.

After a brief time watching with the young men, Robert was satisfied with the progress of his warriors and the younger of his guests. He left Lord Gwain and the boy to watch the training, and followed their directions to the garden and Lady Serenity. He walked sedately, his thoughts once again ensnaring him. Upon entering the garden, Robert immediately felt uneasy. It was too quiet, as if even the birds and the elements had hidden themselves. Quickening his step, he scanned as far as he could see, hoping he would spot the colourful materials of her dress. Rounding the corner of the castle wall, he was alarmed to find Serenity unconscious underneath the bench. Hastening towards her, he felt his heart clench and suddenly speed up, yet still, he scanned the area for danger. He had failed to protect her, broken his word. She must be well.

As he reached her, Serenity began to wake and as soon as she opened her eyes, he saw the fear. She hid it quickly, but he saw and it worried him. Supporting her as she raised herself from the ground, she was ice cold. He turned to call for help but her small hand restrained him.

"Please… Sir Robert, it's okay. I'm well. Please don't make a fuss."

"Lady Serenity, what happened? If you were attacked, I must call the guards"

"My Lord, I must have fallen asleep in the warm sunlight. Nothing is amiss I assure you."

Robert watched her closely, trying to determine why she lied. And he knew she did though she did it well, yet it was obvious, she didn’t want him to pursue this, her eyes pleaded with him to let it go. Deciding to humour her, he nodded to show he understood.

"Thank you"

Her smile was genuine and full of relief. She was strong, too strong for her own good. Whatever had occurred, she wanted to deal with it herself. Robert vowed to himself he would find out what threatened her and crush it. He would start by increasing his security, and making sure his Lady guest was never alone. They walked together back to the Great hall in companionable silence, but he noticed her quick, assessing glances around her. Determination flooded him anew. Whether she knew it or not, he would protect her.