“Still 99%?” Ondine asks me, threading her fingers through the tips of the lavender stalks.
“Still 99%,” I say, breathing in the scent of lavender released by her touch. We’re in the botanical garden, our last morning walk before the flight to Scotland.
“For the record, I think you’re making the right decision. It’s the only decision you could make, right now.”
I give a nod of thanks, not trusting myself to speak. A week has passed since what we’ve taken to calling “the big event”, and I’ve had to do some serious thinking about my future, which is to say my present. I’ve spent so long hating this town that my determination to help save it surprised me, to say the least. And the big event left its mark on Juniperville; there are homes to be rebuilt, people to rehome and look out for in the meantime, support to offer those who’ve just woken up to the fact that the lake in the middle of our town is, after all, seething with those creatures of our nightmares.
Three-quarters of the Sentinel population was wiped out that night. I’m grateful every day that Rufus survived, but I know that the burden of protecting us weighs on him even more heavily than it did before because there are so few Sentinels left. The grief he feels for his comrades is a heavy cloak of sadness, too.
Rufus and I have talked about whether I should choose my fate as a Sentinel of the Deep. Rufus doesn’t want me to, and neither do I, if I’m honest. Selfishly, I don’t want to live out eternity in the deep. Maybe also selfishly, I think I have important work to do on firm ground. Definitely selfishly, I don’t want to leave my father and sister again, so soon after reuniting with them. The sad truth is that although we managed to stop the town from disappearing underwater this time, the threat is still very real. Every night since it happened we’ve expected another attack. Rufus says it’s a matter of when, not if.
Every night Ondine and I have patrolled the banks of The Wash, watching and waiting for something to happen. The water ripples and dances when I'm near, alerting me to the dangers under the surface. Sometimes, when Rufus is able to join us, we all talk about the future of Juniperville. Rufus jokes that he’ll need to launch a recruitment drive for new Sentinels, and somehow keep the general population calm about the dangers that lurk in the deep. Dr. Pendle has suggested that my academic work can be used to educate and inform, even though all of my research has been with people who’ve lost loved ones, and never got them back. I don’t see what comfort that will bring to the residents of my hometown.
As much work as there is to do here, I feel like Scotland isn’t done with me yet, and that I’ll be back there again one day. Maybe that day will come sooner rather than later. There have been times during the past week when I’ve wanted to get on the plane and fly back with everyone else. Honestly, there’s a part of me right now that wants to fly back with everyone else – resume my life there, leave the mess of Juniperville for someone else to sort out. All I can do right now is think about today, and the next few days stretching out ahead of me, and decide how to fill those days as usefully as I can.
We’re three blocks from my father’s house when Ondine says, “Being able to talk to Jenny like this in my head is handy. Plus, it saves me having to risk going back through the portal without you. Just in case you were worried I was going to try it.”
I have been worried about it. As tough as Ondine is, there’s no question she’s in danger travelling through the portal. I wouldn’t dream of telling her what to do, though, so I’m relieved to hear her say it.
“Have you talked to her about your theory?” I ask anxiously, hoping she won’t shoot me down.
“Not yet. A big part of me is still ashamed about that part in our family history, even though I really believe she did it as an act of mercy.”
Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.
“It’s very taboo.”
“Yes, Thom, it is very taboo.” She looks at me, eyes crinkled. “You know when I came to Juniperville I thought I’d meet a whole town of people who speak like they’re from another era. But it turns out it’s just you.”
“Dad always said I was six going on sixty.” We walk in silence for a minute and then I say, “Maybe after you’ve had the chance to talk to Jenny about why she did what she did you’ll feel better about it all.”
“I hope so.”
“Also, we owe Jenny a lot. It was her knowledge that saved Robbo, after all.”
“Her knowledge plus the magical life-giving paws of a loving little dog.”
We look at each other and smile, neither of us doubting that a dog really could save someone’s life. After all, we’ve seen much stranger things happen.
“I’m not going to say in front of the others that I’m going to miss you, but – well, you know.”
“I know. I’m going to miss you terribly, Ondine. After Rufus disapp – left, I should say – I never thought I’d ever have a good friend again, never mind another best friend.”
“It warms my shrivelled heart, hearing you say that. But Rufus needs you more, right now.” I smile to myself at the word more. “Oh and you’re mine too, by the way.”
My face feels like it’s going to crack from the weight of my smile.
Inside my father’s house, five of the seats at the dining room table are occupied. The house smells like Dad’s famous pancakes, and there’s a huge stack of them on Dr. Sidris’s plate, covered in butter, maple syrup and whipped cream. Dr. Pendle elegantly tucks into the single pancake on his plate and, beside him, Lina is also eating one. I see her give a substantial piece to Jason, who is sitting on her lap, staring intently at the pancake. Dad stands up when he sees Ondine and I come in, saying that he’ll make more.
Only Robbo isn’t eating. “Still no appetite?” I ask him.
“No appetite? He polished off a stack bigger than mine!” Dr. Sidris says through a mouth full of pancake.
“What can I say?” Robbo says, smiling. “It turns out your father’s pancakes are the magic charm.”
I can tell by the way he’s sitting that he’s in pain, but Robbo hasn’t complained once since that night. I’ve apologized to him at least a hundred times for almost getting him killed, and each time he’s come back with a story about a near-death experience far worse than being impaled by a jagged tree branch. I think he’s making them up, but I can never be sure with Robbo.
The kitchen smells like warm butter, which my father swirls in the pan before adding a ladle of pancake batter. “I hope you and Ondine are hungry,” Dad says. “Do you want to warm some maple syrup for her?”
“She prefers it room temperature,” I say, shrugging my shoulders. “There’s no accounting for taste.”
Dad puts his non-frying arm around my shoulders. “I’m so glad to have you home, son.”
“I’ve decided to stay for a while, if that’s okay.”
“Okay? That’s the best news I’ve had in five years!” Dad says, beaming. “Your friends will be sad, though. That’s a good group of people you’ve got there.”
I look at them all, gathered around the table, and I know he’s right. We’ve been through so much together. “I’ll see them again,” I say, unable to keep the sadness out of my voice.
“Of course you will son,” Dad says.
We stand there side by side as he flips pancakes, and I load them onto a plate, sprinkling each of them with sugar. There’s so much I have to tell my father, so much I need him to hear. But for now I want to watch him cook pancakes, and then sit down to have breakfast one last time with my friends. There are things I need to tell them, too, like how it would have been a completely different homecoming had they not been with me.
Juniperville would most certainly now be under water, for starters.
I don’t know if Rufus would have survived.
I don’t know if I would have survived.
I need to tell them that I’ve discovered that life is about the people we find along the way who, for whatever reason, choose to stand alongside us, in the day to day battles we fight as well as the huge ones. People who see things in ourselves we often can’t see. People who don’t let us get away with the lies we often tell ourselves so that we can choose the easier path. People who, against all the odds, love us.
And later, after Ondine and Robbo and Dr. Pendle and Dr. Sidris have gone, I’ll go and find Rufus, and talk to him, too. There are so many things I need to ask him, and other things I need to tell him. I think he might already know, because of everything that ties us together – our lifelong friendship, and the fact that he handed me something the night he chose to go into the deep that shifted our lives off of a single track, and onto divergent paths. I know now that those paths will never completely diverge again, and I’m fine with that. I want Rufus to know that, as unbelievably difficult as the life he chose for himself must be, he’s not alone. For the next hundred or five hundred or however many years I have left to live I’ll be watching for any signs of danger, standing on guard, on the shore.