I awoke laying on the bed of a room I didn’t recognize. The light green walls were lit by a desk lamp sitting on a desk next to the bed. I sat up, surprised to find myself in just a black hoodie. Strange. Did my body grow back? It looks different. Very soft and squishy. Touching my fingers together, I notice how cozy it feels to be inside this one. My eyes wander over the room. Books. Books in so many stacks on the floor. The carpet seems like it hasn’t been vacuumed in years. The scent of a cold polluted outside added a sort of sickness to the atmosphere. I covered my face when I heard a chuckle. I turned to an open window, where Mina sat on the sill. Snow fell outside on a building being constructed. Shadowy forms moved about, carrying materials.

“Good morning.” She spoke with fire. “Thought it would be pretty simple, but I guess things aren't that easy. Am I talking to David?” Huh? Do I look that different?

“Yeah?” I did a double take at the soft voice that came pouring from my mouth. I covered my lips as she smiled at me.

“Just checking. Very cute.” She laughed. “Hey, I think you’re a bit distracted.”

“...distracted?” I spoke low, trying not to perceive what sounded so wrong.

“I want to escape. You want me to escape. I don’t want you to kill, and you want to please daddy. It’s fucking up our rhythm.”

“I told you it wasn’t likely, didn’t I?”

“That excuse wasn’t gonna work even if we didn’t have to do this. Do you know why?”

“I don’t think there’s any way you could make it work. Sorry.”

“You’re supposed to say why. Groan…” She stood up, her steps carrying her over to me. Instincts made me want to hide, but she grabbed my collar, pushing herself on top of me. “Because I won’t let you hurt yourself.”

“Hurt myself?” A whisper.

“She knows what it's like to be weak.”

“She’s nothing but weak.”

Voices from somewhere, sounding muffled.

“Do you hear them?” She held up her left arm as she asked me. “Do you want to see them?” I don’t know if I should answer. She takes my silence to pull downwards, letting the sight of her arm fill my vision. I feel something catch in my throat. Lines. Cuts. Interlocking and pulsing. They pull themselves open, making her wince. They’re all…mouths. Rows of teeth hiding tongues, and they all start screaming.

“DISGRACEFUL!”

“IMPURE BITCH!”

“HIDE! HIDE! WHAT ARE YOU DONG COWARD?!”

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“DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!”

Descending from words to incomprehensible gibberish all talking over each other. I could feel my breath halting.

“I can hear it.”

“W-wha…” I stumble over my tongue.

“When I get close to you like this.” She lowers her head to my chest.

“D-don’t. Get away.” My voice sounds completely half-hearted as her ear touches my hoodie.

“I hear all the cuts on your heart, screaming for death.” She raises her face. “Killing people hurts you more than you let yourself feel? No…you feel it don’t you?”

“I-I don’t-”

“The only thing that disappeared that day was your willingness to express your pain, into a dead woman’s arms.”

“Stop.”

“David, you’re actually a pretty good person, aren’t you?”

“I’m not!”

“Or a monster, right?”

“I…”

“You’re a god? Right? Cause you decided to throw away one nebulous concept for another?”

“I am!”

“You’re not.” She spoke the truth. “Just a human pretending to be strong by being their weakest, lowliest self. If that’s gonna be the case, why not just be everything a human can be?”

“I’m not human. Stop lying to me.” I feel my teeth gritting. Don’t cry. You’re not supposed to cry.

“You are. You’re a serial killer who does everything daddy tells them to, who can never fix all the harm they’ve caused.”

“I-”

“You’re a monster who can change the way they look to become anyone they wish. Who can summon guns to blow people’s limbs off.”

“Ngh-”

“You’re not a god. Because god’s don’t exist. Not silly one’s that subsist off simple meanings and understandings, or wishes.”

“...”

“You know what a real god looks like?”

“...wha-” Her lips covered mine. Her softness made my brain go fuzzy. She’s so warm…our tongues gently settling on each other, before she pulls away, our saliva mixing into a trail, falling on my shivering tongue.

“No clue. Let’s make one and find out.” She smiled at me, making my sensitive, tender heart throb. She kissed me again, and my brain became overwhelmed with raging hope.

…

“W-what…are…you?” Through these new eyes, watching this bastard fall on his ass and whimper causes something in me to turn. What is this? This new sense? It’s as if reality has completely changed into a foreign aspect, and yet I can still comprehend it all at the same time. Seeing things through new eyes? I touch the side of my head, feel the silky hair, every cell soft and different. So different. It makes me euphoric. I stepped forward, and with that, every layer of reality beyond the shared consensus existence fell away. A hotel full of dead bodies, destroyed limbs, and meat. I held all self satisfying fantasies in my hand, and crushed them before this false messiah’s eyes. I can feel the stares of the man behind me, confused and strangely proud. I recognize him in my soul, and want to laugh.

“A god, asshole.”

No, that’s not right. Not at all. My fingers become that of a monster’s, sharp blades for fingers. His eyes widening were a satisfying prize for all this suffering. In my soul, deep in its very depths, two voices ring as one, making me correct my original assertion with a light hearted chuckle.

“Scratch that. Just a human.”