After a restless night trying to calm her mind enough to sleep, Nin awoke before dawn exhausted. She felt the weight of uncertainty pressing down upon her. The leadership’s deception seemed so wrong, but they were responsible for the welfare of the colony. Maybe there were some things the colony members shouldn’t know. Regardless, what could she do about it?
Nin ate her morning meal in silence, avoiding interaction with the others. Soon she headed to the surface to begin her daily labor with the swarm of foragers. However, she found it impossible to focus on her work. The leadership’s decision to hide the Great Dying from the colony members kept hijacking her thoughts.
She couldn’t understand the logic of hiding such an important part of the colony’s history from its inhabitants. And why prohibit anyone from returning to Second Sun?
The more Nin thought about it, the more she decided that if they were willing to lie about the Great Dying, then they might be willing to lie about anything. She reasoned that if the leadership was manipulating the perception of the colony’s history, they didn’t have the moral authority to forbid anyone from returning to Second Sun.
As the day unfolded, she felt a rising anger at the thought of a small group of elites deceiving the entire population, purportedly for their own good. How could they be so arrogant? Everyone deserved the truth, no matter how distressing it might be. Her misgivings about those leading the colony weighed on her as she performed her foraging duties. She resolved to share her thoughts with Timka tonight, instead of attending the daily lecture. She trusted Timka and valued her counsel.
That evening after dinner, she descended into the lower sections of the colony in search of Timka. She found her in the nursery, tending to the young.
Nin gestured to get her aunt’s attention. “Timka!” She looked up and signaled a greeting to her niece. “Hi, I’ll just be a moment.” She finished arranging an insulating layer of dried grass over a clutch of pure white eggs, then approached Nin.
Timka knew why her niece was here. She was troubled by the revelation that her aunt had burdened her with and would now have questions. This was going to be a difficult conversation.
Nin checked around the chamber and saw they were alone. “Why is the leadership hiding the truth about why we left Second Sun?” she asked.
“They’re just trying to do what they think is best for the colony.” Timka suspected this wouldn’t placate her precocious niece.
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Predictably, Nin responded “But Timka, withholding the truth is the same as lying. And if they’ve lied about the Great Dying, what else are they lying about?” Timka was beginning to feel a conflict between her desire to support her young niece, and her lifelong conditioning to protect the stability of the colony.
“You shouldn’t be so suspicious of our leaders. It’s a very difficult job to balance the interests of the colony, against those of an individual.”, Timka said.
Nin wasn’t buying it. “If I lied to you, you would be angry with me. Why should different rules apply to the leaders?”
“Nin, they’re trying to protect the colony and everyone in it, including you! You need to understand.”
Incredulous, Nin argued, “Understand? But they’re hiding the truth. Does their position as leaders, give them some special privilege to lie to us?”
Timka scolded her niece, “Nin, you should be more respectful of those who are responsible to make such difficult decisions.”
Nin fumed at the thought that different rules applied to some colony members because of their positions of authority. She wondered why it was forbidden to return to Second Sun. It seemed logical to her to send a team, or even just one colony member to see if it was still abandoned. Life was so hard at Rising Sun, the possibility of reoccupying their old paradise should be a priority.
Nin asked, “But why forbid travel to Second Sun? If someone is willing to accept the risk of returning, shouldn’t they be allowed to? After all, it could potentially benefit the colony. Isn’t that a good thing? ”
Timka’s antennae waved up and down, signaling her frustration “It’s likely there is nothing to return to. Second Sun is probably just a hole in the ground now.”
Unwilling to accept her aunt’s argument, Nin suddenly had an idea. Her aunt was of the same generation as those in the leadership, and she had social connections with some of them. Maybe Timka could arrange a meeting with someone on the leadership committee. Nin could question them directly and even ask for permission to search for Second Sun. It seemed only logical that the leadership would want to know the condition of the colony’s former home.
Out of sheer youthful innocence, Nin bluntly asked Timka if she would arrange the meeting. Her aunt was speechless.
“Nin, the committee doesn’t arrange casual meetings with colony members. Their time is very valuable, and limited. Besides, they might punish me for telling you about the Great Dying. It’s supposed to be a secret.”
Nin offered a simple solution “Tell them I heard a rumor about it and started asking you questions that you obviously couldn’t answer. You thought it best if they explained it to me.”
Timka was hesitant “I’m … not sure. It’s untruthful.”
“Untruthful? You’re only skipping the part about where you told me the secret of the Great Dying. If the committee can lie with impunity, then one small omission on your part is nothing!” She hated manipulating her aunt, but she needed an audience with someone in the leadership. She wanted permission to search for Second Sun. Then, just as that thought formed in her mind, she realized that she’d go searching, with or without the committee’s permission.