"Identity, as in: how do you identify with the magic you are using?"

Father stared me straight in the eyes as he spoke.

"Oh."

"It's one thing to visualize the magic as a copy of something you've seen with slight modifications for your needs. It's another thing entirely to feel the magic as an extension of yourself. I've reached that point with Gravity magic and Time magic. It's actually hard not to use it every chance I get. I'll be honest, I just use the carriage to go into the city for the prestige. I could be there in a second and back the next if I did it the way I'd normally travel."

Father relaxed back into his seat, I assumed the posture he had earlier was beginning to affect his back. He was still young. My own aches started in my late twenties.

"That sounds awesome. So, it becomes a part of your nature?"

"It is awesome. Nature, huh, That's probably one way to put it. It does feel natural to cast and doesn't require too much thinking from me. In that same vein, I still struggle with getting the Elemental set beyond merely compensating with a large mana pool."

"That's why some magic doesn't need us to speak the chant to cast? Because it's just something you do without thinking too hard?"

In that sense, it wouldn't be true for me since I did put a great amount of effort into thinking up the spells I cast. I just happened to get through it really quickly.

"Well, I'm not sure if it's that simple, but I could say that it's fluid in my mind. Although, if I could properly explain what's going on inside of my brain when I cast, then I'd be past being a Saint. That depth of understanding ends up granting you the title that comes next. A Prophet. It's pretty much what you'd call a genius that can make other geniuses. If you ask me someone like that is arguably more worthy of the title of God."

"You don't have to have been a Prophet first before you become a God?"

"Of course not, it's a given that someone that reaches the point where they pose such a threat, overrides the necessity of being acknowledged first."

"Does that mean many of the Ruling Gods are incapable of teaching others the way they use their specialty."

"Yep. However, some rare cases exist too, the current Lightning God was an apprentice to the last Lightning God. There are a few exceptions like that where a seat is passed down directly."

"Are you capable of becoming a Ruling God?"

The question felt innocent enough in my mind, but the intensity in my father's eyes conveyed a critical internal reflection.

"I don't know. Becoming a God would make my life a lot more complicated than it is. I'd have far more responsibilities and I'm not even sure of my current limits. It's kind of unfair for you to spring that sort of question on me Fred. Then again, I'm having you move on faster and faster than your siblings without even telling you what other paths you can take."

"Is that really the same?"

"It is. Genuinely, Fred do you really want to keep advancing in magic like this? Do you desire to become a god? I believe you're special enough, but do you want to?"

"I guess... I don't know either Father."

He sighed and patted my head.

"It's times like this I wish I were better with raising children, knowing their wants and meeting their needs effortlessly. Your father isn't perfect Fred."

Father looked down at the table as he thought of what to say next.

"Kraimer was my first, so I had to teach him myself once your mothers got busy with the rest of your siblings. I figured it wouldn't hurt to teach him from what I knew, he enjoyed it, and it made me less worried because he'd be able to look after himself once he mastered enough. Then Darvy came around to learning alongside him, he didn't like to feel like he was under his shadow either. Barrett didn't really get much of a choice, she followed along to not make a fuss."

"I'm not doing this because I don't want to disappoint you, Father, I also want to learn magic."

He smiled.

"That's good to hear."

My father stared down again for some time after his last word. He sighed and began to speak again.

"Whitney was where I realized I wasn't doing right by everyone. She just didn't like learning about magic at all."

"Really, why?"

I couldn't help but blurt those words out.

"She told me, It felt too chaotic for her. I knew it wasn't right to force her into it if she couldn't keep up. That's why her, Logan and Page all have their own class. I decided if they didn't want to learn magic as a tool for protection, I could teach them a more constructive form of it.

"A more constructive form? Doesn't magic already serve for constructive purposes like drinking water and starting a campfire."

"I'm talking about rune carving, Fred. It's a process that lets you apply effects onto objects depending on the positions of the runes and order. It's quite a bit more rigorous mentally, and you need a steady hand."

"I see."

I figured the level of detail in Father's sketches must've come from practice, most likely from years of rune carving.

"About your older sister, I think Barrett's a little too self-conscious about how it'd seem. So she'd never admit to it, but I think she would've rather done rune carving like your other brother and sisters."

"Hmmh"

The air around the library had been turned tense. I wasn't sure why my father had decided to stretch the topic to such a personal level. I believed it might've been his own way of venting without taking a break from his busy life.

I had never seen my dad take a true reprieve within the time I've been aware. He was always hard at work on some project or another.

"Ahem. This was supposed to be an assessment on your knowledge. It seems I've gotten side tracked."

"It's okay. We don't have to be so hard on ourselves all the time. Mother told me that."

"She does say that doesn't she? Easy to say but hard to apply. I'm going to teach you about rune carving next week alright? If that ends up being more of your obsession let me know. I care about you and what you want, Fred."

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"Ok."

My father hugged me and kissed the top of my head.

"Come on, you still need to practice your magic if you want to keep improving."

I followed him back to the field.

My stepmother was talking to my siblings when my father and I arrived. She had her hands on Kraimer's shoulders.

"How do you feel?"

"I'm excited obviously, I've been working everyday for this moment."

Kraimer sounded pumped. I had some ideas about what they had been talking about.

"You gave him the news already?"

Father interjected himself into the conversation.

"Of course, he's already demonstrated what he can do. And I think he's ready, besides he'll also get to see his fiance this way."

"Veruca you know that should be secondary. So? you're saying Kraimer's ready to enroll at the academy? Even though he hasn't quite reached the Vicar rank like I said I'd get him to?"

"That's right, he's certainly going to be fine. You did your best to get him to this point Mylo. It's time we let him take responsibility of his own studying. Our son's growing up after all."

Stepmother pinched on Kraimer's cheeks. Kraimer tried to pull away with no success.

"Alright, Ve, I trust you. That leaves Barrett, Darvy and Fred then. Fred's still getting there but the other two should be ready by next year."

"I've been meaning to ask about that. Why is Fred here? I said it before, he's way too young."

"Ahaheh. I know you have your doubts about my decision and his. Why not have him show you?"

Suddenly, I was the topic of discussion again instead of Kraimer's graduation.

"Alright, then. Fred go ahead and show me the most powerful offensive spell your father taught you."

My stepmother crossed her arms and stared at Father before looking at me.

"I don't know which that would be. I've done Water and Fire Magic so far."

"Only Water and Fire?"

"Mhm."

My stepmother sighed, but my father's face started to develop a slight grin.

"Go on and show her your spell from yesterday. It's fine this time, I promise."

"Ok."

There wasn't a need to rethink what I had done yesterday. I remembered it clearly and vividly. The mana seeped out of me on command and formed the double spheres of flame with an air pocket in between.

I willed it to the dummy at the center at high speed. Just like yesterday, the forceful blast shattered the dummy's post and burned the debris to ash.

The look on my stepmother's face worried me. She had her eyes wide and then looked over to my father.

"What exactly have you been teaching him?"

"Well, that's the thing, he learned that from seeing Barrett's fireball. He did Water magic all on his own without me teaching the chant to him first or even a demonstration. We just got through-"

"You mean to tell me he doesn't use a chant, and didn't need you to show him what the spell even looked like to do it?"

"Yeah, isn't that great?"

"Mylo, I need you to look at me and tell me in earnest: why would you think it would be a good idea to have Fred learn alongside the rest of your children?"

"Is that a serious question?"

Once again, I'd seen my father's face switch from the playful and relaxed mood to a more serious gaze.

"Yes!"

"Veruca, I told you before, I'm not going to repeat my father's wrongdoings."

Father's claim weighed heavily in his mind from the look of frustration he gave.

"What do you mean?"

I interrupted. I was curious about what my father meant by that, another hidden bit of my father's past that I had very little to go off of. I knew he had been an adventurer and that I had an uncle I was named after. There was that time in the market as well that he had meant to say something to that effect.

"Don't worry about it Fred."

"Mylo, there has to be some compromise."

"What exactly would that even be?"

"Have Fred in his own class at the very least."

"That's exactly what I mean! Why would I teach him isolated from everyone else? He's just a kid too."

"You know, I don't mind Fred practicing with us either."

Darvy spoke up. He didn't seem used to seeing our parents argue, in all honesty, neither was I.

"I also don't have an issue with it mother."

Kraimer decided to talk as well.

"Kraimer you're going to enroll at the magic academy anyway. I don't think your opinion matters anymore. I agree with mom."

Barrett words weren't a surprise to me when I considered yesterday's gossip. I can't say it didn't pinch a bit.

"Teh, typical from the princess, what's your problem with him anyway."

Darvy gave a derisive retort.

"He's not even supposed to be with us he was with Vanilla, Zeus and Luca, they're all closer to him in age at least. He also copied my spell."

"Maybe you just suck as a magician if it's that easy to copy."

Barrett didn't take kindly to Darvy's prodding and gave him a hard slap across the face. Darvy's face became tightened and angry looking.

Darvy started pulling on Barrett's hair. She tried to punch him but he kept evading by pulling her head down before she could wind up a swing.

"Enough!"

Father lifted his hand and the two of them started floating. Darvy let go of Barrett's hair and the two were pulled closer to Father.

"I hate it here."

Barrett muttered, the tears began welling up in her eyes. I hadn't really regarded what I casted as all that special other than what my family considered impressive. Yet, I didn't understand that to Barrett it was something she had worked hard to produce.

My callous actions had unintentionally caused a rift in my relationship with my sister. I wasn't unhealthily placing all the guilt on myself, but I was not blameless.

"Veruca, why don't you have Fred show you around to make yourself at home again?"

"Mylo, about our discussion... we'll talk about it later."

"That would be more appropriate. Now, for the two of you. I can only say I find this disappointing..."

I didn't hear the rest of what Father said as Stepmother and I left them to see the rest of our home. She held my hand as we walked away.

"Why don't we just have a walk around and see if anyone's around?"

My stepmother suggested. I thought she assumed I wouldn't be willing to talk much.

"That's fine with me mom. Can I ask you some stuff while we're at it?"

She looked at me curiously, but smiled right after. Stepmother did not seem as agitated anymore.

"Sure, go ahead ask me anything."

"Why do you think it's wrong for me to learn magic with my siblings?"

Stepmother gripped my hand gently, her intention I guessed was not malignant.

"Frederick, it's not that it's wrong, I'm just very worried about all of my children."

"Worried?"

"Yes, I know I may have spoken a bit harshly, but Fred I see your potential too. Your talent and intelligence is more than impressive."

"Oh."

Stepmother began caressing my hand.

"I want what's best for everyone. As things stand I find it concerning."

"Why?"

"I know your sister's tantrum might seem unfair, and it is. She's also under more pressure now with you around and that's not your fault, okay. Please try to understand me, you are not the problem. You are gifted."

Stepmother looked over to me with a hopeful smile, though her face still looked a bit stressed.

"I get it."

"It's not that I want to separate all of you. I think it's better that your father puts more attention to your practice individually. Rather than juggle all of you into one session."

Yesterday's lesson, Father was always looking back at my siblings in between his phrases. He made sure to help with direction, or he would even outright leave our current conversation to guide my siblings.

"That makes sense. He's just one man."

"That's right, but we still love him."

I smiled and nodded. I had the urge to change the subject, there was more I wanted to ask Stepmother.

"Do you remember the garden that was in the courtyard?"

"I do."

"What was it like?"

We continued walking through the central library. It was void of anyone else, but the stacks of tomes and scriptures held in shelves that stretched to just about two floors was never considered unlively.

"It was quite beautiful, it was almost a tragedy to have it gutted."

"Almost?"

"I thought your father was only planning on removing the garden by scraping up the flowers and dumping them elsewhere. He made a second garden around his own quarters and replanted them there."

"I never noticed while I was in his study."

Stepmother leaned down to pat my head. She let out a slight laugh.

"Fred, the door to that garden is locked. There are some places in your father's castle that aren't really meant to be seen without permission. Don't worry though it's to keep you safe. I'll show you a spot where you can see it from inside."

"Oh?"

"Let's go, there's not much else to see on this floor other than the courtyard and the library anyhow."

"What about the old wing?"

"The old wing?"

"Yeah, the part of the castle no one goes to. It's here on the first floor too."

"You haven't been going to that crumbling place have you?"

"No, it's dangerous because it's old, right? Mother told me about it."

"She's right, good. It's not safe, and it's pretty scary isn't it? An unlit corridor with cracked walls. Who knows what could be lurking around there."

Stepmother tried to frighten me so I played along.

"The scariest."

I shivered to fake a spine chill.

Stepmother laughed at my childish reply.

I knew I was boldly lying about not going to the abandoned wing, but I didn't have much of a choice. I was certain if my stepmother of all people discovered it she might put a stop to any further training there. Stepmother was far more involved in my actions than my mother, not that my mother is careless she's simply too kind.

The fear style was something I had become attached to out of curiosity of how it gelled with magic.

With that same thinking in mind, I came up with another question to ask my stepmother as we ascended the stairs to the second floor.

"How come Father hasn't taught any of us swordsmanship?"