It's hard to put into words what I felt right then. Hell, I don't think "felt" would even be the right word for it.
I would say that I was floating, but that requires a surface to float on. But right then, I was the surface too. I was a part, an aspect, of a writhing sea. It undulated, bubbled, and convulsed violently, but I somehow felt a profound peace in its chaotic motion.
Memories and sensations flowed into me in rapid succession. One moment, I was born in a warm log cabin. The next, I stabbed a man for twenty dollars. And after that, I won the presidential election of a small nation. But somehow, I knew that these recollections weren't mine. I still held my past life close to me, clutching my identity close. I was unwilling or unable to let go unlike the rest of the residents here were. It might have been just pure stubbornness, or maybe I was just greedy.
This was the Stream of Souls. It wasn't quite the afterlife, but I knew for sure that the body I had grown accustomed to was dead. These truths came readily to me as soon as asked them.
Of course, I was upset about the timing of my death. I was this close to retiring at 24 years old. In truth, I hated my job. Being a Runner had its perks, of course. But endlessly grinding characters to max level only to sell them off and start again got monotonous fast. It paid well, though. It was definitely enough to retire at such a young age, and I was looking forward to it so much too! It was my ticket to never seeing those stupid blue screens ever again! Virtual reality always had the worst aesthetic choices and that galling shade of blue irked me to no end.
Well, this outcome wasn't horrible. Now that I was dead, I got what I wanted in a roundabout way. This wasn't so bad, I decided. Maybe it was the environment affecting my thoughts, but I didn't care. The soothing peace of the Stream was undeniable and I found myself adrift and content.
"I see you're enjoying yourself, Nick", a voice wormed itself into my consciousness.
Despite its melodic beauty, I found myself sinking into a deep sense of foreboding. If I had a body, I would have broken into a cold sweat.
"Don't be like that", it giggled, "It's been a few years after you've died already. Now it's the time for your reward!"
Years had passed already? Huh, strange. Then again, time probably didn't work the same here. At any rate, I was anxious to hear of this reward the voice mentioned, since I had no recollection of ever earning something like that in my past life.
"Oh, but you have! So rarely have I seen a mortal with such dedication to the abstract, to the fictional. You poured out your heart into each life you created and still had the compassion to let others share in your work. It touched me. Truly, it did", it explained.
I couldn't help but think that this voice had it all wrong, horribly wrong. Make no mistake, I hated virtual reality, I hated each of the characters I created and sold. It was solely a job for me.
"Erm", it faltered a bit before continuing, "And I've also never seen one with such humility."
The voice was definitely in denial, I had no doubt about that. But more than that, I felt an emotional undercurrent in its words that I couldn't identify. Regret? Suspicion?
"In any event, congratulations are in order. You are being reborn!", it said, crystalline voice welling with pride, "We cannot have the soul of a true artist languishing in this place. I have arranged so that you will be born in a world of magic, kingdoms, and the very same system you worked with for all those years. You will have an opportunity to immerse yourself in a way you have never been able to, isn't it marvelous? I have set your destiny in such a way that you will be my chosen, dealing out justice and saving the world from the clutches of darkness. And when your work is done, you will be able to retire and die in peace with your wife and family. Truly a life many would be envious of, but I can think of none worthier than you."
...
Rage. That was the emotion I felt right then. The sort of white hot fury that stabs you in your gut and tingles the base of your skull. Rage.
Every word spoken was the opposite of what I wanted. This was exactly the type of fantasy crap that I despised, the kind that I always intentionally avoided during my job as a Runner. Investing myself into the lives of fictional characters, those NPCs, was a waste of time - they weren't even real! But this talk of destiny solidified the notion that I would be doing exactly that, against my free will. Not only would I be forced along this life of servitude, but I would be doing it as I stared at those wretched blue screens again! This was a nightmare!
As if in response to my maelstrom of emotion, the Stream frothed and boiled as it slowly but certainly began to form a whirlpool around me. The violent tide seemed to feed off of my mood, taking on a malicious fervor as it grew larger and larger. Eventually the whirlpool encompassed all I could see, as the now-dark liquid groaned like metal under intense pressure. All at once, the churning eddy came to an abrupt halt and the Stream of Souls became as smooth as glass.
"Enough!", the voice erupted, all pretense of politeness dropped, "Do you have any idea the strings I pulled to get you this?! I personally slaved over this destiny for years and I will not have you ruin your own future because you do not feel worthy! That is childishness to the highest degree!"
True, my reaction wasn't the most mature, but I couldn't help but think that this voice was the real childish one here. It acted like a spoiled child, forcing others to play when they didn't want to. The voice still acted as if I was some saint among saints and I couldn't help but grow suspicious at its insistence. My mind raced as I desperately tried to think of a way out of this.
It seemed to sigh before concluding, "There is no decision in this matter. In order for your destiny to be as grand as it is, I had to remove most all choice ... Take care to become strong and thrive, Nick. I expect great things from you. We will be watching."
After that, a deeply uncomfortable sensation of itchiness came over me. It was as unbearable as having ants crawl under your skin. Even worse came the sounds of sizzling and popping, which startlingly came from me. I was melting. My perception warped and stretched, engulfing me with the dizzying feeling of vertigo, like I was falling. Or maybe plummeting would be the right word. I tried to scream but I had no mouth.
I blacked out.
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Have you ever been almost blackout drunk? Ever stand up too quickly and almost lose consciousness? Being a baby is remarkably similar, only the feeling isn't temporary.
Your senses aren't developed enough to focus too deeply on anything and your nervous system hasn't advanced enough to properly understand the feeble amount of data that you do receive. In short, it sucks.
From my limited perception, I was swaddled in cloth and surrounded by wooden bars. One could only assume that it was a cradle, but my eyes refused to focus enough for me to meaningfully inspect it. My limbs were too feeble to do more than twitch and occasionally sway, so I was stuck in the cloth for the time being.
Thankfully, I was spared the painful process of being born. From my experience, that's the main reason why most people chose to start the game as an adult. Unfortunately for me, that was never an option because I needed the insane EXP bonus from undergoing the youth "tutorial" to level up my characters quickly enough to meet deadlines. Thankfully, the game would only take about a week worth of play time per stage of growth, from baby to toddler to child to teenager.
Of course, that was assuming this new life would follow the same rules as the game I was used to running, Portal Online. I didn't trust the goddess that rebirthed me to not pull the rug out from underneath me. She probably threw in a wrench somewhere.
After what I could only assume was a few hours of quiet contemplation, a familiar blue screen popped up in front of my eyes, much to my chagrin. Fortunately, I was able to focus on the words thanks to it being a mental projection.
Welcome to your new life!
You can now summon your status window.
You have been given the title "Chosen of Eremere".
May fortune favor you in your new destiny.
Chosen of Eremere
The eyes of the goddess shine upon you.
Faith attribute unlocked.
Experience gained increased by 50%.
Ah, the very thing I was trying to forget about, my destiny. From the way the goddess spoke about it, it seemed as if there was no getting out of this.
From the way I saw it, I figured I had three options.
First would be to die as soon as possible. It wouldn't be that difficult, but the issue didn't lie with the difficulty. I didn't trust the goddess to not simply plop me into a new body and force me to start over again, or maybe even punish me severely.
Second option was to obey and basically be this goddess' bitch, doing her bidding until I die. Even then, I still had no guarantee that she wouldn't repeat the process infinitely. The very real possibility of eternal servitude caused me to blanch.
The last less of an option and more of an attitude: rebellion. Of course, I had no concrete plans on how to execute this vague notion of rebellion, but that didn't stop it from being appealing. Human beings are contradictory, wanting both connection and agency. It had been a long time since I had a desire to fit in, to belong, so all that I had left was a burning desire to be independent. I would find a way out of this, I decided right then.
"Status", I mentally yelled.
Info Name - Race Lesser Human Class - Level - Title Chosen of Eremere Status HP 10 / 10 Stamina 10 / 10 Attributes Agility 1 Charisma 1 Constitution 1 Faith 1 Intelligence 1 Strength 1 Wisdom 1
Jeez, starting me off with the bare bones, huh? No stat above a 1 and no bonuses besides a useless stat and an EXP bonus that I couldn't use for a while. And of all races, why a Lesser Human? I was basically stuck in this weak sauce body until I developed enough to train.
Well, it wasn't all bad. I knew quite a few tricks from my experiences in being a baby over and over again.
First, I closed my eyes and turned my perception inward. The first thing that caught my attention was my incredibly fast heart rate, as is normal for a newborn. I listened impassively as it rapidly thumped. As I "watched" it seemed to slow, or at least my perception of it did. The tide of blood pouring into and out of it made its path to each of my extremities, steadily branching off into separate veins. Eventually my perception deepened enough to hear my tiny breaths. My lungs filled and exhaled steadily, much shallower than an adult. I stayed like that for a while, simply taking in each detail of my new body.
Ever so slowly, I opened myself to my surroundings, expanding my mental perception from my body millimeter by millimeter. The process was exceedingly gradual, but I had undergone this very same process many times, and I had nothing but a long week ahead of me.
After a while, I began encountering trails of light, whirling in a sort of sporadic but lazy dance. I couldn't help but be reminded of the northern lights, as I noted the lights' very similar behavior. This was mana. Or more accurately, these were leylines, the paths along with mana traveled.
Immediately, I began tugging at the one closest to me, honing my mental perception on it. Of course, the ley line resisted because I didn't have a mana well established. It took quite a bit of pulling, coercing, and general elbow grease before the leyline finally relented, diverting its path through my body.
The instant that it did, I felt the familiar sensation of that was in between extreme heat and extreme cold. I pooled the feeling right where my stomach should be, allowing the energy to collect until it became painful. All at once, I severed my connection and opened my eyes.
Skill "Mana Manipulation" created!
Mana bar created!
Nice. That must have been some sort of personal record. Usually something went wrong and even if everything went according to plan, it was painfully slow. I could make some progress with this extra time I earned.
Sighing, I mentally prepared myself for what came next. It would hurt, a lot.
Again venturing inward, I found my newly created mana well, pulsing quietly. Gingerly, I pulled a stream of energy from it and allowed it to blossom throughout my body. I nearly keeled over at the immediate pain. It felt like I was being electrified from the inside out, but I persisted, forcing my newly created body to digest the energy it found itself flooded with. It took an agonizing moment, but I managed to do it. My bones became just a bit more dense, my muscles just a tad stronger, and my tendons just a little more flexible. In the past, when I tried to deliberately increase just one attribute or otherwise attempted to modify my body, it always ended with failure. I would end up looking like a mutant when I inevitably grew up, forcing me to scrap the character and try again. After trial and error, I determined that allowing the body to adapt the energy itself was the most efficient way of growing. Trusting your subconscious with your growth always took a step of faith, but it was a necessary one.
A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.
I called this process "Mana Infusion" because the system didn't have a name for it, simply treating it as a subset of Mana Manipulation. Mana Infusion was no substitute for actual training but it acted as a very potent supplementary method of growth. That potency was enhanced by the fact that I was a baby. Just like how learning a language when you are younger makes it stick more, pouring mana into a young body produced more results. A baby's body was simply more malleable than an adult. This little known fact enabled my past characters to have stats well beyond their level, increasing their auction price by quite a bit.
Agility, Constitution, Intelligence, Strength, and Wisdom increased by two!
I grasped my hand, finally able to perform simple motor functions. Good. This was a decent first step, but that didn't mean I could stop. Who knows how dangerous the world that I found myself in was? Let alone how dangerous the trials ahead of me, set by the goddess, were. If I didn't grow as much as I could, then I could find myself dead or worse.
My mana well was empty and the profoundly hollow feeling permeated my mind, almost lulling me to sleep. Snapping out of it, I went into a self-induced trance. I again reached out into my surroundings and pulled ley lines to me. They seemed to be more eager to listen now that I had the Mana Manipulation skill and my own mana well. As the mana pooled into me once again, I didn't stop pulling once I met my capacity, instead allowing it to overflow into my body. Mana Infusion wasn't a one-and-done thing, rather, it was a process that needed to be constantly fed. Of course, that also meant constant pain, but I would get used to it. I always did.
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My stomach rumbled in protest. Although the growth that Mana Infusion forced was largely fueled by mana, that didn't mean it didn't put stress on the body. It undoubtedly did.
So, I did what any baby would do. I cried.
The shrill noise was louder than I expected, but I didn't stop. The wail seemed to reverberate in whatever room I was in and it wasn't long until I heard the shuffling of feet. Two lumbering giants arrived at each side of my crib, and though I had made quite a bit of progress, my perception wasn't good enough to make out any facial features. All I could tell was that they were wearing pure white robes that hung loosely off their forms.
"Oh, our little one has quite the pair of lungs in him, Enise", one giant boomed, his voice bassy and deep to my new ears.
"As expected, he seems to be as whiny as you, Dorian", the other replied cooly.
"Hey!", came the first's protest, apparently named Dorian, "That was uncalled for."
"Well, only one thing to do", Enise giggled, picking me up gently.
Ah I remembered this first time I did this. I was so nervous to be a grown man in a baby's body, taking milk directly from the source. Over time, the event lost any appeal to it. I was simply following nature's course, and so I drank as much as I could without getting embarrassed.
"Oh! He's seemed to have been blessed with mana, and a good amount at that! It looks like we may have another mage on our hands", Dorian proudly relayed to Enise.
Interesting. It's a rare thing to have parents who are sensitive enough to detect that. This family was unusual, my gut feeling told me.
"Oh phooey. I was hoping to raise him to be a warrior like me. Well, I guess time will tell", she replied, patting my head, "Still, to have developed mana before we even named him! How strange."
"Speaking of which, I was thinking of Doyle as a name, like his grandfather. What do you think?", he proposed.
Enise hummed her assent as I balked. What a truly and utterly terrible name.
Do you accept the name Doyle?
Yes
No
"No!", I screamed mentally, thanking the heavens that I had a choice in the matter.
"Wuh?", both giants expressed their surprise at once.
"'Your child has refused the name Doyle' the screen says", Enise read, scratching her chin, "Unusual, I never even knew that a baby could even do that. Welp, I guess onto the next name. How's Todd?"
Again, no. Not as bad as Doyle, but Todd was almost horrifyingly bland.
In the end, there was a solid hour filled with these failed names. I almost couldn't comprehend just now gross these people's naming sense was, and it made me dread being raised by them.
Even after rejection after rejection, both Enise and Dorian only seemed to grow more energetic and excited. They saw it as a sort of challenge, I guessed.
"Pedro", Dorian offered.
No.
"Kyle", Enise submitted.
No.
"Robert", Dorian suggested.
No.
"Jack", Enise proposed.
N- actually that one wasn't half bad. Maybe it was the constant naming barrage whittling me down, but I finally clicked "Yes".
After a little celebration, both of them finally left me alone.
I took the opportunity to continue my Mana Infusion, eagerly slurping in as much energy as I could handle and a little more after that. Enduring the unpleasant experience that was my current parents lit a fire underneath me to get better so that, if anything, I could leave this house as quickly as possible.
As the constant skill level up and attribute gain notifications buzzed by, I found myself smiling. This felt like cheating, but I didn't care. All that mattered to me was that I survived and thrived. It would be only then that I would have a chance at undoing this stupid fate of mine.
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The week was flying by and I found myself dreading the upcoming deadline. The gains from Mana Infusion didn't slow down at all. In fact, it only seemed to accelerate as my skill in Mana Manipulation grew. But I knew that this exponential growth was temporary, as becoming an infant always slowed down progress. That was something I accepted, but I still found myself greedily clinging to my growth.
During the week, I was introduced to a few key figures.
First was my personal retainer, a middle aged man named Fawkes. His greased back silver hair, ever present smirk, and uncaring blue eyes screamed "mid-life crisis". This guy was something akin to a servant and his job would be to ensure my safety first and foremost. I could tell that Fawkes was going to be a speedbump on my road to independence.
Next came Liliana, a mage, one could easily tell from her wide-brimmed witch's hat and staff. She was petite and short, and had a sort of bubbly personality. But that didn't fool me. I could tell she was much older than she was letting on by the way her eyes always seemed on guard, her careful footsteps, or even how calculated her words were. Liliana would make for a dangerous enemy, I decided.
Lastly came my older brother, Weiss. He was a young child, about six or seven years old I guessed. His green eyes and blonde hair were both family traits so that didn't surprise me. What did catch me off guard was the sheer maturity and intelligence that he displayed. He was already being groomed to be a wizard, and he had the potential to be a great one. I only wished that he didn't look at me with such derision. It would make my childhood much easier if I got along with him, but I could already tell that wouldn't be an option. Sighing inwardly, I resigned myself to avoiding Weiss.
All in all, not a bad start. From what I could tell, I was born into some fashion of nobility. I wasn't privy to the details but I was happy that I wasn't starving at least. Still, I couldn't form any meaningful attachment to anybody I had met. Inwardly, I knew that the situation was different, but I still found myself thinking of these people as NPCs. Complex and realistic NPCs, sure, but NPCs nonetheless. I didn't see that changing either.
Shaking off that line of thought, I finally found myself with a high enough Mana Manipulation skill to pull off my first ritual. Rituals were unique in the world of magic in that you technically didn't have to unlock them in the system before you used them, unlike spells or invocations. All you really had to do was say the right words, sacrifice the necessary materials, and pay the right amount of mana and boom, you completed a ritual. Of course, I was aware that it wasn't that easy. Rituals were an exceedingly rare type of knowledge, and as a result, I only knew a few, even after my innumerable replays.
I ensured that I wasn't alone and began to prepare. Wobbling, I stood up.
"चोमे तो मे, देनिशेन्स् ओफ़् हेल्ल", I exercised my tiny voice, infusing each word with mana and raising my hands above my head, "ई सुम्मोन थे लेगिओन्स् ओफ़् सिन."
The words themselves were Sanskrit, I found that language the most effective in rituals, more so than Latin. Something about those words hummed with power, even without mana infusing them. Of course Portal Online had its own magic language, but it simply wasn't as impactful as the dead languages of Earth.
"एन्लिवेन मे, गिवे मे स्त्रेङ्ग्तः, ई बेसॆच् योउ !", I finished, arms shaking with the power coursing through them.
The energy escaping from me exploded with a shower of sparks. The space above me cracked and shattered, revealing a void that seemed to live on a seperate layer of reality. The cracks traced through the air, forming a seven pointed star in a circle, a heptagram.
An ominous black screen popped into existence, vibrating slightly.
You have performed the forbidden rite, Birth of Sin.
Select a sin to guide you on your journey.
Most rituals had effects that were both positive and negative, something of a give and take. Birth of Sin differed. The effect was entirely positive, but it started out small and grew from there. This particular ritual suited my circumstances perfectly, as any normal ritual would no doubt destroy my infant body with its power.
Birth of Sin intentionally injected Hell's native energy, res, into the soul. It was one of my favorites, not because of the initial power it offered, but because of the more subtle advantage of balance. Mana, for all of its versatility and strength, was ultimately only a positive force. There were limitations on what a positive force alone could accomplish, and one that relied solely on mana would find their growth stunted. There was quite a bit of truth to the chinese principle of yin and yang.
After a bit of consideration, I chose the sin of greed. Pride, wrath, and greed were always my go-to choices, but I always found myself drawn to greed.
Sin of Greed chosen.
Experience gained increased by 10%.
Res bar created.
The effects of spellcasting have been increased by 10%.
Res and Mana synchronicity found!
Both energizes are fused and the Qi bar is created.
You are the first to perform this ritual and the first to choose the Sin of Greed.
The effects of this ritual have been doubled.
You have been given the title "Avatar of Greed".
Avatar of Greed
The eyes of the demon lord Mammon are on you.
The effects of enchanted items are enhanced.
You earn 25% more money than usual.
The final two screens caused me to raise an eyebrow. I supposed it had something to do with this world being separate from the world of Portal Online. In this world, the knowledge of rituals was probably much different. I licked my lips, thinking of the bonuses I could accumulate by scooping up the first ritual performances. What a wonderfully greedy thought.
As the final days of the week came, I found my Infusion speed had doubled, due to using the more powerful energy Qi instead of mana. As I didn't have a way to hide my steady growth of energy, both Liliana and Dorian became increasingly worried. They debated back and forth about what should be done, with Dorian insisting that they find a way to stop my growth and Liliana suggesting that they see how far I would go.
In the end, Dorian gave in because all this energy accumulation wasn't having an adverse effect on my health, quite the opposite in fact.
The final hour of the week came, finding me satisfied. My growth was leaps and bounds better than I had expected, thanks to establishing my mana well so early. I knew it wouldn't be smooth sailing from here on, but at least I set a decent foundation for the future.
What sullied the mood was Weiss. Our parents had the bright idea to have him spend more time with me, and I could tell both of us hated it. For the most part, he spent it ignoring me to read a book and I took the time to further my Qi Infusion.
I say for the most part because he was now at my crib, staring at me. Of course, I stared back, taking a better look at him. The kid had an undeniable boyish charm, the kind you would find in child actors. He had freckles on his cheeks and nose, contrasting sharply with his pale complexion. His facial features were good too. That is, they would be if they weren't twisted into an unabashed scowl.
"I hate you, Jack", he finally stated, as simply as someone would say that the sky is blue. His words had no emotion to them, but I could tell without a shadow of a doubt that he was being honest with me.
After a moment, I smiled in that cute dumb way only a baby could.
"... iss", I bubbled.
"Huh?", he seemed genuinely surprised, eyes wide.
"Weiss", my baby voice vocalized.
My new brother stood in absolute shock. Of course, I knew it was petty, but using my first word to mess with him was oh so satisfying.
Your time as a baby has ended.
You have entered the toddler phase.
Ah damn, just when his reaction was getting good too. Ah well.
Four years flashed by in a blink of an eye, quite literally. The system was showing me my actions during those four years, allowing me to make objections and changes as I saw fit. I never really used that feature much though, as the system always did a good job predicting my actions.
My preview self spent the majority of those four years using Qi Infusion and performing exercise, I was thankful that all that time spent mindlessly grinding was over in an instant. It also seemed as if Weiss' attitude toward me took a full 180, as the little squirt took me under his wing, teaching me what was taught to him about magic, all of which I already knew.
I was sequestered in the house for the majority of those four years. Even when I was allowed out of the house, it was under Fawke's careful eye and within the family estate. I chafed at the close leash they had me on, but I fully enjoyed the opportunity to become stronger without any particular obstacle. That fact came with a measure of peace.
Little did I know that my peaceful days were coming to an end.
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Info Name Jack M. Stratford Race Lesser Human Class - Level - Titles Avatar of Greed, Chosen of Eremere Status HP 570 / 570 Stamina 570 / 570 Qi 570 / 570 Attributes Agility 57 Charisma 8 Constitution 57 Faith 1 Intelligence 57 Strength 57 Wisdom 57