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Rocko McGoblino, Goblin Extraordinaire
A Goblin makes some Rhubarb Pie

A Goblin makes some Rhubarb Pie

The cookies didn't sit well with Rocko.

Too much sugar in them, and not enough substance. He didn't even get to prank any kids, and thusly, the look of pure gobliny despair on his otherwise handsome goblin face was a true sight to behold. Particularly as Grandma Smotrich dressed him up in her frilliest children's clothes, no doubt they were the prior treasures of wretched old Barbra's newly acquired grandson.

Rocko clearly must have loved those clothes though, as his face changed through various colors as they hugged him ever so affectionately! Isn't that right, Rocko??

He certainly garbled in pure gobliny joy, and the sweet, innocent, grandmotherly smile from Grandma Smotrich... Ah, what a wonderful affair! The outfit truly fit Rocko quite splendidly, as he must have become the fanciest goblin alive. He certainly couldn't take his eyes off his reflection in the mirror, a slight shine gleaming from them as he cried tears of joy at his new lavender and chocolate frilled outfit.

With a swift, irresistible flick, Grandma Smotrich gently placed a bonnet atop Rocko's head, to which he was practically bouncing with joy!

With the sweetest cackle that must have filled the room with jellybeans of joy, Grandma Smotrich exclaimed: "Now you look the part, my sweet little grandson! Ahh, so perfect! You can go meet the other grandsons now, my dearie! After all, its time for Grammas little nap. Just don't wander too far, Gramma will need your help later, heheheheeee!" With a whish and a whoosh the should have blown the house down, Rocko found himself whirling through the house like a warbling vroomba on a wednesdayweekday afternoontime. That is to say, much of everything was a blur, and he found himself spinning to a stop on quite the grandmotherly of porches. He copious floral chairs sat perfectly round a rounded table, much as round tables were meant to be.

Such it was that there was a floral vase perfectly centered on the table as well, full of cinnamonbuncakes, snickerdoodledoos, and all kinds of other gingerly oriented treats. In the shape of flowers? Yes! Flowers! Of course they were!

Ah, and the sweetest of smells, accentuated by the soft rocking of Grandma Smotrich's rocking chair. Yes, the soft...

Rocko spun around quickly, and nearly lost his footing after all that spinning. He breathed a sigh, clearly in disappointment that Grandma wasn't there, but instead, lo and behold! Twas another grandchild! A rather large one at that, and not in the height sense. Truly, he could have been no taller than Rocko, who stood at a respectable three and fourty-five/fourty-eighths feet high. Unlike Rocko's prominent and respectable pot-belly, one could argue that this child was all-belly.

With the most eloquent of grunts, he warbled like a birb in the midday sun of a desert without a droplet of water to spare, yet graced with oppositely as much spittle. "What'chu lookin' hat, bumya?!"

Obviously, Rocko couldn't help but oblige the other child, his mouth gaping open in joy along. He was so happy to make his first friend as a grandson, that he couldn't restrain his own beads of saliva! After all, he couldn't leave the other kid alone in the matter.

"Haaaa, me Rocko. Me Grandson now. Hmmmm, who you be?" Rocko slurped up his saliva as he spoke with his most eloquent Goblin tongue. After all, too much mess wouldn't do, now would it, Rocko?

"Wut? Ya dun know me? I'm Glondo, me Grammy is Gramma Mabel. Course ya hafta know Gramma Mabel, she and Barbra run this shop. Tha' makes me ya bettah!" Glondo's eloquence was truly unmatched, an absolute sight to behold! His speech was so timed that it fused almost harmoniously with the well-timed jiggles of his chin.

Ding!

The message dinged.

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So the message read. Such a funny little message it was, that Rocko couldn't repress another bout of drool in amusement! He croaked, much as the frorgs do, in pure gobliny joy! Well, he certainly tried his best, at least, as again, Goblins are certainly not frorgs at all.

"Mmmm, better, yes, yes. Hmmm, I know good spot for berries? You like berries, yes?" Rocko, excitable little fellow that he is, was certainly not one to forget his manners. After all, it was time for him to make a new friend. And, while he was at it, he wouldn't have to miss out on eating berries after all! His eyes gleamed with ecstasy at the thought!

"Hew wut mate?! Hurry up den, show meh da berries!" Goldo launched himself into the ultimate rolling launch from the rocking chair.

Ding! Through observation, you have made initial progress in the grandson system!

Ding! You can now train in the Grandson Exclusive Skill: Do a Barrel Roll!

Progress to level up: 0/5 Barrels Rolled.

Rocko couldn't wait, oh how he bounced with joy.

"This way, this way! Don't slow down now!" Rocko cheered him on, as the boy rolled along behind him, crushing many a stone in his pleasant little path. Before long, they were able to reach the fabled berry patch, upon which Gordito descended with glee. Rocko was very much so excited as well, because with the berries and other ingredients of the forest, he would also be able to make his own Rhubarb pie now! It would certainly make up for the one he missed from the village earlier, but one could still find a certain appreciation in the freshest of ingredients.

He of course quietly invited his bestest goblin friend, Stoneo, and they quietly gathered all their other Goblin friends to have such a surprise party for Monseigneur Grande. One could suppose that this would qualify as the days prank on the village children, no?

Ah, but the fun with friends was not long to last at all! And soon, Rocko McGoblino Smotrich would have to hurry back and return to the village, fresh Rhubarb pie still stuck dripping from his lips. After all, he couldn't risk being late and upsetting Gram Gram! He was such a good grandson, after all.

Ding!

The message dinged heartily, as messages are wont to do.

Ding Dong!

The message double dinged again, almost as if in a little tune to get Rocko's attention.

Badababuh buh badabubuhhhhhh!

Hmmm, no, that was definitely in a little tune after all. And with it, came a new popup menu, as shiny and pleasant as a popup ad showing up on your car's windshield in the middle of a midsummer freak snowstorm that dropped on you as you were driving a meager ninety-seven miles per hour down a residential highway.

Name: Rocko McGoblino Smotrich Class: Grandson Stats: Still there, probably getting better Spells: Eh, not yet Skills: Do a Barrel Roll: 1/5 Barrels Rolled Level: 2 Enemies: Grandma Barbra Winkleheimer and her army of Grandsons, Grandma Mabel, definitely not... Grondel?

Rocko smiled in that heavenly goblin smile of his.

Me be grandson not so bad after all.

So he thought, with that goblin brain of his, as his fingers gently stroked away some of the cloth so kindly and resiliently hugging around his neck. Oh my, what a mess though. It seems that Rhubarb pie spread around a bit more than he thought.

Me stop at spring first before home.

Hmmm, yes. Good idea, Rocko. The spring would be a good visit. After all, it wouldn't do for a goblin to be spied around town covered in such a mess as freshly made Rhubarb pie.